May, 13th
I see I abandoned this diary and I am sorry for it. Writing about all of that left me so exhausted I had to leave it and then things started happening and distracted me. I took some trips with Switzerland and the most shocking: one evening I found I had stained the sofa with blood. That's right: I got my first menstruation. Switzerland almost suffered a heart attack. Good thing Austria was much more calm about it because if it had been for my brother, I would have been hysterical. Eventually, Switzerland had the good thought of calling female friends who, of course, knew much, much more about the matter than him. They came home and had pastries together. They pampered me so much. Miss Belgium congratulated me for having turned into a woman. Miss Belarus warned me that it would occur once a month, it was completely useless and it hurt, so I had to get used to it. But she and the other gave me very good advice and answered all of my questions. They say it is a sign that I am growing up.
All that happened made much of the attention focus on me. When I went back home there were cameras from all around the globe broadcasting how my princes hugged me in tears. My people celebrated my return with a national festivity. I couldn't disappoint them. That life I had conserved had to be of some use. I started by becoming the voice of the micro-nations, who were left alone and hurt after the attacks they suffered and the disappearance of their leader, Sealand. I spoke in their favor as much as I could, gave them the chance to speak for themselves. I also implied myself more in state matters. I wanted to make Liechtenstein appear on the maps, make myself be noticed. I don't want to be Switzerland satellite eternally. He has already risked so much for me. I think the best way I can pay for his attentions is being as independent and adult as I can.
I feel more adult indeed. I did all I could to escape form that hell. And I have my own secrets.
I haven't heard a single comment about the existence of Tero, the Only Nation. At the house they only found three corpses, all of them human. That is the official version.
But I don't want to give one more thought to those people. I've left my memories in these pages and so I free myself from it.
This year they've invited me to the Eurovision contest even if I couldn't participate for different reasons. I accepted, of course.
We met in Milan. I had the chance to do some tourism before and after the show, and it turned out to be a very interesting city. I had the chance to meet Latvia, who had never seen Milan either. We talked a bit about everything. He said I was very brave and surely very strong, having survived that captivity. If Switzerland hadn't been around, like a guardian dog, maybe we could have talked about many other things, Latvia wouldn't have felt so intimidated. But Switzerland couldn't prevent us from seeing each other at the stadium where the show was celebrated. He didn't get to classify for the final, so, like me, he was free to chat around and explore. We sat side to side. And Switzerland by his side. Oh, well! He had also failed in the semi-finals, but he seemed to care more about my companies than the show.
From my seat I could see the other nations. Australia showed up giving spine-breaking hugs to everyone. Much was spoken about England's company: three young people, one girl and two boys, which England introduced as the Vaughans, not related in any way to the singer or her crew, who looked around enthusiastically, took photos of everything and everyone and wouldn't stop joking. Jokes in which England participated.
Russia's apparition got things a bit tense. As soon as he approached, the Nordic countries walked away. I believed for a second Finland was going to throw the soda can he was drinking. I don't know why they did that. I've never seen them behave like that. Russia didn't seem to care. Only I saw he found someone there who made him feel good instantly. It was his sister Ukraine. I saw them approach each other, exchange some words. Then, she left some kisses in his face as if he was a child and, oh, I've been told terrible things about Russia, but they wouldn't think he's so bad if they had seen his face when she did that to him. Their little sister Belarus approached them and Ukraine included her in the hug. Seeing them made me smile.
A man sat by my side, one who carried a little white bear in his arms and let me caress. "He won't bite you" he assured me. Apparently, he was the honorary guest that night but nobody seemed to remember him in the whole night. Not even I can remember what his name was. But he had a good time. I heard him cheer enthusiastically.
The flag parade was spectacular, with a gigantic screen in the ceiling which reflected the flag of the country that was introduced. Each nation crossed the catwalk to the participants' zone with their singer or singers.
Nobody except the Anglophone countries sang in English. All of them performed in their respective language. An old vindication which seemed more necessary than ever at the time.
Belarus started with a song performed by a woman who apart from playing the violin danced. Greece followed with something inspired in a tune from his place, with dubstep touches. Then Finland made the whole stadium vibrate with a female heavy metal group. Then Romania came with a man who seemed to be dressed with a ballet dancer suit and a king's cape. Portugal presented a couple who sang an incredibly romantic song, so much I thought they would kiss live. I liked Turkey's representatives, because apart from traditional music they had dancers who did pirouettes all around the stage.
There were comments about some of the performances.
Because of the lyrics of the song, like the bearded man who sang for Germany:
«And if I could be born again / Start over / I would change everything»
Or the one Lithuania was apparently involved in, sang by a seventeen year old girl:
«We think we are on our own / But we are all connected / By the long thread of life»
Because they were lively, like Spain's entry, called 'Come and dance', performed by a seventy year old lady, who had us standing up to clap and dance. In fact, that year made history because it was the only one in which there was not a single ballad, not one single sad song.
There were some moments, actually. It was unavoidable. Russia presented a song called 'Peter Pan', which, even if it wasn't what we usually call a sad song, made Latvia by my side wipe a few tears which ran down his cheeks. Cameras focused on England. Although he kept his posture quite well, I noticed his collar seemed too tight for him. When the performances ended and there was a time of rest before voting, there were performances from some Eurovision winners and revisions of winner songs from Italy. A man sang a song about loving forever, the song North Italy was going to use to ask his girlfriend to marry him. I saw some nations couldn't contain the tears: Hungary, Ukraine, France, even South Italy. His brother, on the contrary, sang along with his eyes on the ceiling with a smile. But generally it was a very, very lively show. I have never danced so much in my life. I even lost a hair clip for moving so much.
The decisive moment came, the voting. You could feel the nervousness. Old quarrels surfaced. Prussia's screaming voice was heard saying to France and Spain that the one who ended up in the last position would pay for some beers.
The vote of the professional juries gave the United Kingdom the victory, followed by Iceland and Monaco. But, as usual, televoting changed everything. Magically, United Kingdom became third, Turkey ended up second and the winner turned out to be Lithuania.
He didn't believe it at first. He looked around like asking himself why his name was the first on the list. His singer and partners attracted his attention, and he gazed at them with his eyes open wide, asking again and agian 'what? seriously?'. Even Poland got up from his seat to pat his shoulder to make him notice. He finally reacted, hugging the winner and going to the stage with her to get the trophy. "Thank you, Europe!". He let his singer say the words, because he was speechless. He had never won before, he was too happy.
The party did not end there. After the show it was mandatory that the winner went partying. Of course, the other nations joined. We met at Italy's villa, where we stayed till late, talking, laughing, dancing. There was a lot of alcohol (by the way, it was France the one who had to pay for the promised beers), even someone got a Twister game and Prussia, Hungary, Ester Kostrová (Slovakia's representative singer), North Italy, Spain, the three young people who came with England and Denmark played. When it got late and came the time to go the hotel to sleep (some were so wasted they had to stay at Italy's house) I was still giggling as I got into bed.
Now I am back home. There is no place like this. I've missed so these prairies, my home, the staff of my house, Hans, Marie, Alois, Maximilian, Constantin and Tatjana. My people, who throw me kisses when they see me coming. Being with my brother, simply sat on the grass eating sandwiches. I'm at home. It is marvelous. I have never felt this happy for being here. Alive one more day to enjoy and try to do good to my people.
Indeed the darkest times are those which help us value what we have, both the people and our lifestyle.
THE END
