Alfie finally got his sisters involved when he decided that he needed to take Quinn away for a weekend and they were more than happy to help. Iris knew he'd been seeing someone but he had kept it as quiet as possible and she'd let him. Alfie had to do it his way, she was worried if they pushed too hard he would withdraw, she knew he was worried about the affect it would have on Addy and Lola and Mae were hard to control some days. They wanted this for Alfie more than anything.

They had been good together; it was slow and steady but frustrating especially when Addy got sick and Alfie soon followed and it was almost two weeks in between seeing each other. Quinn had understood but it had bought up a lot of questions for her. He hadn't wanted her to meet Addy yet and on the one hand she fully understood his position. She had met a lot of different people in a short space of time and she still got jealous if people took too much of Alfie's time away from her. On the other hand she felt like they were stalling a little because of it.

"Pack a bag, you won't need much, something to swim in I guess but I don't plan on letting you get dressed too often."

"Where are we going?"

"Away. Just you and me, I'll pick you up Friday after work and we will be back on Sunday."

"What about Addy?"

"Just you and me, Addy's staying with Lola for the weekend." Alfie told her. "You'll love it."

"That doesn't tell me much."

"It tells you all you need to know right now."

"What if I have to leave a note, in case I don't come back?"

That had upset Alfie and she had no idea why. He snapped at her that if she didn't trust him what the fuck were they doing. Quinn had been a little surprised and he apologised immediately and explained why he reacted badly and then she felt awful. 'I shouldn't have snapped at you, I am sorry. My parents never left a note, they just didn't come back.'

Quinn apologised and he brushed it off. He had reacted in the moment and that's how he worked; he'd react then just move on. Even when he picked her up she tried to apologise again. "Quinn, please don't worry about it. I've forgotten about it. I should never have spoken to you like that, you didn't deserve it, that's not who I am."

It had rocked him little, it still did some days, out of the blue his past crushed him but he kept forging ahead and he wanted to share something with her that meant a lot to him. He had bought people here before but he knew this one was going to go deeper into his past than he had previously, he always kept things very on the surface as a coping mechanism and a way to protect himself. This was make or break for them and suddenly he wasn't sure he was ready for that. Perhaps he was scared she'd decide to walk away and that was the last thing he wanted.

They got about half hour out of Chicago when Alfie finally told her where they were going. "My grandparents had this beach house and my Dad used to take my Mom up there all the time, it's stayed in the family. I love it and that's where we are going."

"I can't wait to see it."

"Every time I came home from Australia I'd always come up here to relax." He liked the feeling of her hand on his leg and he played with her fingers. "I've bought Addy up here and she loves it. When we first got back and I had those three months off with her I bought her up here for a couple of weeks just to relax and get to know her, it was just us most of the time and it was great." She did like how he had taken the time to really get to know and settle Addy in, it may not seem like a big thing but it showed her how much he cared and really thought about what was best for her.

Quinn saw a sign for a rest stop and asked if they could stop so she could use the bathroom but Alfie drove straight past it. "I can't stop there." He added quietly. "That was the last place they were seen alive. I can't stop, I'm sorry."

She slipped a hand behind his neck and stroked behind his ear. "It's okay." He took a deep breath and she noticed he was shaking a little. "Alfie, just breathe." Of the whole trip, every single time it was that place got to him, he loved the house and all the memories but he hated that place, he hated those people for being the last to talk to his parents even though they had moved on years ago. For Lola it was the spot where they died, Mae never came and Iris had no memories of any of it.

"It's stupid, I know. The people who were there moved on a long time ago but I've never been able to face that place."

"It's not stupid, I can't imagine how that feels."

"They sent us a letter, a long time ago when they heard about us. It was nice of them I guess, they wanted us to know how happy they were together and how much they were looking forward to seeing us again. Man, that still feels like a kick in the guts." They drove in silence for a couple of minutes while Quinn's steady hand comforted him.

"I find you fascinating." He knew that Quinn was watching him drive.

"How so?"

"So many layers, I've never met someone like you before."

"I'm an onion." He chuckled.

"I like onions, they make me cry yet I am strangely okay with it because it's worth it in the end."

"Do I make you cry? I don't want that."

"Yes you do and that's okay." Quinn assured him. "There is good crying you know. You make me good cry."

"Okay." He didn't really understand that but it was time to change the subject. "You are not going to pee in the car are you? Addy's already done that."

"No, but if it is much further you may need to pull over."

"It's about ten minutes."

"I will cross my legs." She wasn't desperate yet, but it was coming. "So Addy peed in the car?"

"And shat and spewed, all of it. I've cleaned up more bodily fluids than I ever imagined. I used to laugh at my sisters when they bitched about stuff like this so I get no sympathy from them. It's just nasty some days."

She screwed up her nose. "Sounds like it."

"I hate it when she is sick, it breaks my heart. She asked for her Mum the first few times and that was tough."

"I think she's lucky she has you."

Alfie just chuckled as Quinn leapt out of the car and barely took a second look at the house when Alfie let them in. He pointed out the where the bathroom was and stepped out of her way. When she came back she found him in the kitchen putting some groceries he bought into the fridge. "Feel better?"

"Much."

Quinn took a look around at all the photos and mementos scattered around. "This place is so cosy, it feels very homely, like a family home. If these walls could talk, there feels like so much history here and love."

"Oh, they'd be things they'd tell you that'd make you blush or run. We were pretty crazy as kids." He pulled two glasses out of the cupboard. "Are you hungry?"

"A little."

Quinn sat up at the counter and poured them a wine while Alfie started preparing their dinner. He put some pasta on to boil while the sauce was heating up and she took over when his phone rang. "Hey Darlin', how are you? Are you ready for bed?"

"Yes, I miss you Daddy." He had it on speaker and she had the cutest voice. She'd heard him talking to Addy before but this was the first time he put it on speaker and let her listen in. It was the first time she'd heard Addy's voice and that in itself felt huge.

"Hey Darlin', I miss you to the moon. Are you having fun with Sam?"

"Yes. I sleeping in Sam's bed."

"Lucky girl." Alfie screwed up his nose and Quinn laughed. "What does Sam think?"

"He like me."

"Of course he does, who doesn't?"

"You come home soon?"

"Two more sleeps Addy, remember two sleeps at Sam's house. You are going on the boat tomorrow with Lola and Riley. Have lots of fun and be a Djinda."

"And Sam and Baby Billy." Addy still called him Baby Billy, that had never changed.

"Yep. I love you Adelaide. I miss your kisses and cuddles."

"Love you Daddy."

He took it off speaker and talked to his sister, assuring her they made it safely, that he was being nice, and Lola reminded him to having fun and not to worry, Addy was having a great time. Quinn did laugh when he commented to his sister that Addy was way too young to sleep with a boy. She had no idea what his sister said but Alfie just grumbled. "Yeah, yeah. Love you to Lola Bear, look after my girl." It was his first time away from her for a whole weekend, even when he was working nights he still saw her during the day and Iris would often bring her in for dinner when he was working late.

"Well aren't you the cutest little Daddy."

"Thank you Mam." He bowed a little. "It's all part of my charm. You know this is the first place she told me she loved me and called me Daddy."

"Really? What did she call you before?"

"It started with Alfie, then I became Daddy Alfie and eventually when we were here she started calling me Daddy. Man, it sounded so damn good. Hearing her say I love you Daddy was just this heart stopping moment, I knew we'd be okay then."

"Wow. I didn't think about any of that." She just assumed that Adelaide had always called him Daddy, it didn't occur to her that it was a process of adjustment for both of them.

"Neither did I, she knew I was her Daddy but never said it. Sometimes when she gets really upset or scared I get Alfie again."

"That must be tough."

"Like a knife to my heart." Alfie carried both plates of food over to the couch while Quinn bought the wine. "Anyway, enough of that. Bon appetite."

"This is nice."

"What? Are you surprised that we've spent four hours together and not had sex yet?"

"Well yes, but the anticipation is just as exciting."

Alfie groaned. "I am rapidly losing my appetite."

"For me?"

"No, for food."

"I like it." She was right though, it was nice just to spend time together, eating, laughing, drinking and learning about each other. They sat crossed legged on the couch facing each other and ate dinner, shared a bottle of wine and Alfie made her laugh as he talked about some of the mishaps he'd had working with animals. He didn't talk about Adelaide much and when she asked him why he told he that he wanted to be more than just Addy's Dad.

"You are more than that."

"I know but sometimes I get overwhelmed by it, like suddenly everything I do, every decision I make isn't about me anymore. I used to be able to just pack up and come here or accept a speaking engagement for the Foundation or go to a party or game without having to plan it like a military operation. I spent three times as long packing for Addy to spend two nights at my sister's than I spent packing to move house. It's insane." Quinn loved this side of him as much as the funny stories he told. "I would laugh at my sisters when they arrived with all this shit; bags, toys and food for an afternoon and I thought nope I'm not doing this shit and then I took Addy out one day and she spilled her drink all over herself and she hates wet clothes, like I'm talking hates it and she took everything off and I'm standing there trying to get her dressed again and she refused because they were wet, and she refused at the top of her lungs, I swear people thought I was killing her so we are in the bathroom drying things under the hand dryer so she'd at least have something on. Never again, now it's a full three changes of clothes."

"A whole new world hey?"

"Yep, and when I bought her up here my car was packed to the rafters and now she packs her own stuff too and that's a battle. We get here and open the doors of the car and stuff just falls out it's jammed in so tight."

"You seem really happy here."

"I love it here, it's my favourite place on earth. And I love it if I am here by myself, or with a crowd. I love bringing Addy up here, she enjoys this place as much as I do. I am really looking forward to this weekend with you though."

"Me too. I feel special."

"You are special, you know that right?" Alfie looked serious all of a sudden. "Things have changed for me in ways I never expected, what it also made me realise is that I can't just go with the flow anymore, there is another little human now I have to take into consideration and I wanted to bring you here because I am starting to realise that I want you in our life. I know you haven't met Addy yet and I want you to meet her soon. I want you in my life."

"I've tried to rationalise all this, you, Addy, your life and how it works with mine. How it will all fit and what I want."

"And?"

"I can't stop thinking about you, I get giddy when your name pops up on my phone, I can't wait to see you. I love that you always ask about me, how my day is, you remember things I've told you. You are smart, sweet, funny, sexy, patient and so incredibly amazing in bed and I really want you in my life. Whatever we have to do to make that happen we can." She reached for his hand. "And I really can't wait to meet Addy."

"Yeah?"

"Yes, oh god yes. I love listening to you talk to her or about her. You are so crazy in love with her and as a woman I find that a bit of a turn on to be honest."

"Really?"

"Alfie, you are a Dad. That's never going to change, never. I didn't know you before, this is all I know. I don't know if being a Dad makes you a better person, but I really like the person you are."

"You make me feel good about being a man again, not just Addy's Dad."

Quinn ran her hands up both his thighs. "Do you feel like being a man right now?"

"I certainly do."

Alfie woke her up early with some urgent kisses and eventually dragged her out of bed for a walk along the beach and a swim before breakfast. He started talking about his parents, which Quinn had heard bits and pieces but never the story of how they met, he told her about how they had come up here when they were first dating.

"When they met up again about ten years after they split Mom was with another guy but once she saw Dad again she knew. He had come back for his new job but he was also roped into giving a talk at her Dinner, she had no idea who the speaker was going to be and she walked into a meeting and he was there. They couldn't stay away from each other. He went back to Africa for a couple of months, she broke up with her boyfriend and then when he came back this is where they came. Dad picked her up one morning, she didn't know he was back and bought her here."

"Is this were they first like….. did it?"

Alfie laughed; it was cute the way she asked. She looked a little embarrassed. "Ha, no, I don't think so. I do know that Dad was her first though, I don't think it was here."

"So it meant a lot to them, this place."

"It did." He stared out of the water.

"It's nice that they were here together at the end."

Alfie looked wistful, he wondered what they talked about, if they talked about them and how much they missed them. They had called them the night before to talk to them and he knew that Lola had sent them a message and their Dad had replied, she still had that message. He recalled nagging Lola to borrow her phone to call them to tell them something but she wouldn't let him. "I am sure their last few days were pretty sweet."

"Is that why you love it here?"

He shrugged. "I guess. I've always felt close to them here, even after all this time. Crazy huh?"

"No." Quinn watched him from the corner of her eye. He was miles away; his mind was with his parents. "What was that like?"

"What?"

"Finding out they died." Quinn always wondered if she went too far. Alfie kept telling her that he didn't mind the questions, it was part of getting to know someone. On the odd occasion that Alfie felt it was too much he always told her and changed the subject.

"I don't remember much. Pops told us. I know Lola was angry, she slapped Pops across the face. I remember that." Some things he remembered and some were stories that he had been told so many times it was like he could. "Mae stopped talking; for weeks she didn't talk, not a word and I tried desperately to look after them all. She still does that sometimes when she's really hurting. I just wanted to take care of them and I didn't know what else to do. Bug was so little and I was always protective of her. She slept in my bed for months." He was digging his toes into the sand and she could tell he was struggling a little and she regretted asking and bringing up such painful memories for him but he didn't tell her he didn't want to talk about it.

"I can imagine you being a very sweet brother."

"I was the man of the house. My Dad always told me that, he'd tell me that 'we were the men Alfie and we have to take care of our women.' I took that very seriously; I didn't want to let him down and I thought I had to do it all, I didn't want anyone to help me. MiMi and Pops were so great. We actually were supposed to live with Sam's sister Heidi and Hudson but we wanted to stay with MiMi and Pops so they all decided that was the best thing for us in the beginning. We never really moved."

"I love the way you look when you talk about your family."

"They are all I had." Alfie squeezed her hand. "I was going out with a girl, not long before I found about Addy and she was pissed with me because I left a date half way through dinner when Pops called to say he had a fall. He was okay but he was home alone and I couldn't leave him. I had to go."

"Why was she pissed?"

Alfie shrugged. "Guess she didn't like that I chose Pops over our date. She didn't get the family thing, I never really talked about it with her. I don't know why." He did know why, it was because she was just a bit of fun, someone to mess around with, have fun sex and the one time he had mentioned something about his parents she had just changed the subject and Alfie closed off a little after that.

"Was it a special occasion? The date?"

"No, just dinner and you know, a root."

"A root?"

"Sex, sorry, I'm speaking Australian. "He explained. "A root is, you know a screw, bonk, fuck…." He looked at her and laughed. "….a bash and dash."

"Got it."

Alfie had suddenly had enough of the trip down memory lane, he needed something to take his mind off it. "Want a root now?" He smiled and winked, tugging on her hand.

"Yes."

Alfie poured them a whiskey to share and they settled onto the couch after dinner, he had talked to Addy before she went to bed and she had told him all about the day on the boat and that Riley took them for a swim. The first time they took her out on the boat she cried all day and would not move off Alfie's lap but now she loved it. "I want to show you something." He pressed play on his phone and sent a video to the TV. "We've all got one of these."

Quinn was stunned to see a video of 'Alfred Phillip Ruzek Hollister'. Right from when his mother was pregnant with him right up until their death. Gus had organised for them each to have a movie made of all the moments, videos and photos of their life with their Mom and Dad. She looked at him quickly and he was just staring at the TV, she leant forward and was transfixed and reached for Alfie's hand. He was very quiet and the next time she looked at him he was watching her and not the screen which unnerved her a little.

It was beautiful, from the moment she saw his parents celebrating the pregnancy, although she knew that it was a horrific pregnancy for his Mom. The video of his sisters with the blue balloons shouting it's a boy, their first cuddle, lying on his Daddy's chest at night. It was beautiful. She watched his first steps, rolling over, talking, running, singing, jumping, cuddling his parents, his sisters and some breathtaking videos of him with Iris. She could see why his relationship with Iris was special, it always had been. Her favourite part though was watching him sit with his Mom when she was pregnant and he was running a train over her stomach, she asked him what he was doing and he told her he was playing with his Bug. Quinn actually gasped. It was beautiful and heart breaking all at once. "The train?" She got it, she got the train and why he didn't talk about it.

"Yep."

The final picture was of Alfie and his Dad outside shovelling snow together, he was talking to his Dad and he looked so happy. "That was the day before they left." He added quietly.

"Oh Alfie, that's beautiful, I don't know what to say." She had tears streaming down her face. "Your Mom was so beautiful, and I can see your Dad in you, you look so much like him. That's a really, really sweet thing to have. How do you watch it?"

"I don't."

Quinn swung around quickly to face him, he had tears in his eyes and that shocked her. "What do you mean?"

"I don't watch it. That's only the second time I've watched it."

She grabbed his face and kissed those tear-filled eyes as they fluttered closed, there was so much pain on his face it took her breath away. "You beautiful precious man."

"It hurts, it's always hurt." He leant his forehead on Quinn's and wrapped his arms around her waist. "I've been angry, sad, jealous and sometimes I hate myself."

"Why?"

"Because I've hated them. I hated them for leaving me." It was very raw and she could now feel his pain as well as see it. "And now with Addy, it's all come back, all those feelings. I hate her mother some days because I didn't know about her for so long, her whole life and if something happens to me now she's got nothing. I've got that…" he pointed to the TV. "…that video, I've got more than seven years. Bug doesn't have that, she doesn't remember anything and if something happens to me Addy will have nothing."

"So Alfie, make those memories for her. Capture every moment, live every moment with her and love your little girl."

"Will you help me?"

"I think you are the Dad Addy deserves, you've got the chance to be the Dad you always wanted to have."

"I did have a Dad, for seven years."

"I know you did and I didn't know him but I think he's a big part of you and your Pops helped you be the man your Dad wanted you to be and now you can show everyone that you are that man, that Dad, for Addy."

It was an intense few hours, Alfie had been very open and honest. She had learnt a lot about him and how he ticked. He had always felt things keenly and been protective of his sisters. He felt like this with Addy now and it had taken him six months to leave her and start to think about himself. It was a big deal and it made her realise how much he was trying to make this work between them. He wasn't going to let people into Addy's life if he didn't think they had more than a fling going on. If he was willing to put his heart on the line for her right now she wanted to give him the same. "I've never met anyone like you. I didn't think men like you existed. I'm glad I met you and every minute I spend with you makes me look forward to the next minute and the next."

"You are so sweet." Alfie was surprised when Quinn stood up and indicated he should sit forward a bit. She slid in behind him and let him lie against her. They were quiet for a while; Alfie was enjoying the feeling of comfort he was getting from Quinn's hands in his hair as she cradled his head to her chest.

He was emotional, he was hurting and he wanted her to see all that and he'd never felt like that before, he had never shared so much with someone. Quinn saw a new side to him, not just the fun, sexy side but a passionate, emotional man who had dealt with more heartache than most. He had demons and for once he wanted to share it, to ease his burden. She wanted to help him because she was falling in love with him. That realisation didn't scare her, it was a beautifully intense moment and she closed her eyes and let it wash over her.