YUKI

Yuki glanced up at the stars and shifted her hold on the bag of food she was taking to Zero. There really was such little time before this would all be over… Somehow, it would all be resolved, and all this time planning and on the road would seem like a bad dream. Well, not entirely bad. No, she had certainly made some good memories, as well.

Unfortunately, she was quite sure that Zero wasn't considering those happy moments at all lately. Lately he'd been sporting a rather pinched, brooding look that she might have found endearing under other circumstances. Anyway, she was fairly certain he hadn't stopped to eat much all day, so she'd decided to bring him something. Stress wasn't good for the appetite, but he needed to keep up his strength, especially before they launched their attack on the capital.

As she approached her knight's tent, she saw a familiar red-headed figure heading in the opposite direction. "Akatsuki. I didn't expect to see you here at this hour," she told him in surprise.

"I had a report to deliver," the redhead informed her in his deep rumble.

Thinking of Kaito and Zero's near-assassination, she warned, "Don't let your guard down, not even here in the safety of camp."

She could still scarcely believe such a thing had happened. To think that one of their own men had been a spy! Worse, he was Queen Shizuka's sworn Bloodguard..! How many more spies were amongst their ranks? She glanced around suspiciously. There could be an assassin lurking just about anywhere, and no one would know.

"Will do." His tone was serious, but she detected a twinge of amusement.

She shifted uneasily, then confessed, "It would be bad for morale, but...I wish my friends would stay behind, out of danger…"

A rueful smile. "I wish for that, too. I would prefer to leave Ruka back home, but...she is determined to be here. And she's been helpful, as well. Already, she is fussing over every detail, worrying over things I didn't know to be worried about. It's refreshing to watch her boss around the soldiers…" He chuckled, then sobered again. "But...to lose her here...it would be more painful than I could bear."

Yuki pressed her lips together. Somehow...the battle, this war...it still didn't feel real, even while she knew that it very much was. Even in her own head, she hadn't mulled over the possibility of defeat. "Why is it that I must send such precious people into danger? I keep thinking it will be alright, because it's them, when I should be more worried, like Ruka."

"Are you saying that you're not worried at all about the battle?"

No, that wasn't it. "No… I just...I suppose I feel optimistic. In my heart, I feel confident that everyone will make it through this, because they are strong, far stronger than I. But...although I say this, there is one exception… Whenever I think about Zero fighting, my chest seizes up. I know that someday Zero will die… That scares me, but maybe in this case my worrying is excessive…"

He nodded. "It's natural to be worried. Just don't let that fear paralyze you in battle."

"Somehow I'm an utter mess. Even I hate myself when I'm like this…" She was both anxious and cheerful, stressed and hopeful… Truly, it was such a tangle of emotions that she didn't know how to begin to sort them out. She shook herself from such thoughts. "Anyway, don't get yourself killed."

"I'll try," he promised. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight." She watched him as he strode away, and then signalled her assigned guards to stand watch outside as she ducked into Zero's tent.

At once, she chastised herself. She really shouldn't be popping in unannounced! But, it was a difficult habit to break… Inside, Zero reclined on his bedroll, propped up on one arm as he read one of the novels he'd borrowed from Hanabusa's library. In the candlelight, his pale skin was cast with a warm hue.

"Hm?" He raised an eyebrow from beneath burnished silver fringe as she entered.

Yuki moved to sit beside him, chewing the inside of her lip a touch nervously. "Hi. How are you feeling?" she asked. Really, should she barge in on him like this? She had always done so unconsciously before, but now they were both very much in the public eye here in camp.

"Fine," he answered, sitting up and putting down the book.

"Do you need anything? I brought you some food…" She placed the small bundle of bread and cheese she'd brought beside the makeshift bed. Zero had been so busy today, she knew he'd barely eaten.

He gave her a lopsided smile, saying, "You do know I can take care of myself in these matters, right?" Nevertheless, he carefully untied the bundle and took a piece of bread to nibble on.

She flushed. Maybe she was being too much of a worrywart, just as she'd said to Akatsuki. "But...I want to take care of you…" she mumbled. More than that, she wanted to keep him close, to make sure he was eating and sleeping properly. If he wasn't in good health before the battle… She swallowed.

"Thank you," he murmured.

For a moment, Yuki merely listened to the sound of her knight chewing. Then, quite abruptly, she asked,"If I were like Rido or Kaname, you wouldn't love me, would you?" She wasn't sure where the thought came from, but… Rido and Kaname had both been heirs to the throne...and both had been consumed by darkness. That same blood ran through her veins, after all… She frowned, brows knitting together anxiously. She could not allow herself to fall like they had.

A brief sensation of pain on her forehead startled her out of her thoughts. Zero had flicked her! "Alright, you," he scolded. "Stop trying to imagine it so vividly."

She giggled, rubbing her forehead. "Sorry. It's just that sometimes I feel like maybe...that potential for evil is within me, too…"

Finished with his snack, Zero tied the bundle of food back up and set it aside. "Get some sleep," he told her gently. "You've been so busy these days that you haven't gotten much, have you?"

You haven't, either, Zero, she thought, although she didn't voice it aloud. Instead, she suggested tentatively, "From time to time we should try sleeping together. like that one time, before…" That one time, after Hanabusa and Yori's wedding… It had been surreal...falling asleep to the sound of his voice, waking up in the warmth of his arms… It was something she wanted to experience again...something she might never experience again should the battle go poorly.

A sigh crept across her lungs. Great. Now Akatsuki had her thinking about worst case scenarios...

Zero was quiet for so long that she fidgeted and said, "You can say no..."

"It's not that I'm against it…" he replied at last. "It's…"

"What?" she wove her fingers together, held herself back from disappointment.

"Everyone is looking at you here."

She made a sour face. "I hear that enough from Hanabusa."

"We'll soon be at the capital…" he trailed off. Then, "Thank you for always being there for me, for saying that you like me the way I am. Really, I'm the one who should be saying all this. Thank you for caring about someone with such a bleak and bloody past..."

Yuki shook her head. "I just couldn't accept that your future was going to be painted black because of what happened to you. If only my kind knight could smile peacefully...I always had these wistful thoughts, ever since we first met."

"Since then so much time has passed. I'm happy that the number of things I have to be happy about has increased."

"You're happy?" she asked, heart fluttering.

"Yes. I'm happy." The smile he gave her was rare, genuine, and utterly breathtaking.

"Me, too…but I'm so scared of losing you…" she admitted. "I want us to properly be together at least once before-" she broke off abruptly, realizing the weight of her words. "I-I mean..!" Ugh. She had put her foot in her mouth. To say such a thing, out loud..! But...it wasn't as if she didn't want to… She wanted to share the same closeness with Zero that Hanabusa and Yori had. Preferably...before it was too late…

Her face was heating up several degrees. Did she really want to propose such a thing? They had only kissed before; she didn't know the slightest thing about doing anything more..!

"I'm going to ignore that…" He chuckled.

"Eh… But… No…" She was making a mess. She took a breath to steady herself and continued, "About that… It's something I want to consider properly with you… It is a very special thing, after all…" She was just digging the hole deeper, now.

"Is that so?"

"Yes..."

"Then let's consider it properly...later." He touched her cheek. "I think it's better if we do things naturally, at our own pace."

"But…" A sudden lump constricted her throat. "But...if one of us should die…"

"Then...I suppose...we could sleep together tonight, like you wanted. Even if it will reflect badly on us…"

"Really?" she brightened immediately. "I can stay here with you tonight?"

"Yes… Although…"

She cut him off before he could finish, "I already know. Hanabusa fussed at me enough the other day about propriety or something like that. As if he's one to talk! He hasn't been acting with propriety towards Yori at all."

"Away from the court, and he isn't going to be king…"

The princess rolled her eyes and puffed out her cheeks. "It isn't fair."

"If we make it through this battle, we'll have a lifetime," he promised.

"A lifetime sounds good," she breathed.

Carefully, Zero tugged her into the circle of his arms and laid down on the bedroll. Like before, her small form fit perfectly with his. Against him, she felt herself relax entirely. She wanted to stay like this, not just for tonight but for always.

"I love you," she whispered.

He turned back to blow out the candle, then leaned forward and kissed her cheek. "I love you, too."


AN: What are your expectations for the battle? Leave a review and let me know!