Sakura and Sasuke sat across from each other. There were five candles lit between the two, a dagger in the middle, and an insane, chaotic smearing of red handprint marks revealing white here and there painted the floor. The couple of ninjas began chanting in the secret ninja language that Kenshin helped them create a forbidden happy fun time hitokiri murder genjutsu for the learnings of. What it sounded like doesn't actually matter, so let's just go with "Umkcha jingydingadatcha."

"Umkcha jingmpldatcha," Sakura chanted.

"Umkcha jingydingadatcha, Sakura. C'mon, what are you, Naruto?" Sasuke asked, staring blankly.

"It's a really stupid word, Sasuke."

He shrugged. "Not like I made it up."

"Yeah, then who did, and how?"

"I don't know, Sakura. Just do the chant. Umkcha jingydingadatcha."

"Umkcha jingydingadatcha." "Umkcha jingydingadatcha." "Umkcha jingydingadatcha."

The wind blew.

The chanting was supposed to take a few hours. Sakura frowned at the thought. With a huff, she tried to concentrate again. A rustling sound came from a tree. Sakura shut her eyes. The rustling stopped, but soon came the chirping. She fucking knew it. Pain in her forehead, she gritted her teeth hard, the corners of her eyes straining.

"Sasuke?" Sakura asked. She created a clone to continue the chanting.

Sasuke frowned. Sakura was going to want to go off on a tangent or something. "Yeah, Sakura?" he sighed and created a clone.

"How do you make a new jutsu?" Sakura asked. The wind blew. She leaned forward and placed the hood of her cloak over her head.

"I don't know," Sasuke replied.

She put her gloved hands on her knees and leaned forward some more, turning her head, eyes squinting.

"What?"

Sakura glared. "But you made kirin, didn't you?"

Sasuke stared at her. He shut his eyes, shrugging with his hand up. "You got me," he said.

"So?" Sakura asked, leaning forward further.

Sasuke opened his eyes and stared at her. "Well," he said, tapping his fingers against his leg. "No idea."

Sakura nearly fell over onto the knife, but she put a palm down. She felt, and saw, her husband's fingers on her forehead. His eyes appeared to glisten. Perhaps his feelings about his brother were still complicated and she shouldn't have brought him up. It was an accident, though….

"Sakura," he whispered. Had he even blinked in a minute? Five?

She scratched the back of her head. "Sorry."

"Huh?" he asked. He blinked. "What are you talking about?"

Her mouth started to open, but she caught herself. "Nothing, Sasuke," she said.

"Well, okay," Sasuke said. He raised a brow. "How did you know about kirin?"

"I don't know…" Sakura replied. Her eyes widened. She turned her head. She raised a hand to her chin. She smiled. "Nope," she frowned. "Wait!" she raised a finger. "You must have told me!" she said, mouth wide.

He shook his head. "Nope."

"Darn."

"Was that not the first reason that came to mind?"

"You callin' me dumb, buddy?" Sakura asked, frowning. But she couldn't, and her lips cracked.

Sasuke smiled.

A little.

Time passed, and the "ninja ritual" was complete. The area became flooded in smoke. Sakura fanned her hand in front of her face, wincing. Atop the knife a baby slug and baby snake appeared. Katsuyu lifted her head, the antennae-like eyes wiggling around. She stared at Sakura with her large grey eyes. "Sakura?" she asked.

"Sorry, Katsuyu," Sakura said. Her brows fell. "Really."

"Sakura?" Katsuyu asked again. The shadow of Sasuke's hand began to fall over her, but it moved past her and he snatched up Aoda, the snake. Sasuke, holding the small creature by the back of the head, between thumb and index finger, brought it to stare face to face. Katsuyu watched on intently. The small snake went into Sasuke's mouth.

"How is it?" Sakura asked.

"Crunchy," Sasuke said in between chewing. Once he started again, he placed a hand to his mouth.

Katsuyu stared, mouth slack.

"You're going to barf," Sakura said.

Katsuyu's eyes began to tremble.

"NN, U, R," Sasuke said, swallowing some. There was still half the thing left.

"Keep your mouth shut!" Sakura said. "What are you, a little kid?"

"NN, U, R."

"Are you smirking?"

"Who knows?" he said in between a bite.

Katsuyu was very confused. She still felt like she should be terrified, but something about the situation was strange. She never liked snakes very much anyhow.

Sakura leapt forward, landing in Sasuke's arm. The two looked face to face. Sasuke's cheek was full, and a snake-tail was hanging out of his mouth. Sakura grabbed the snake loosely by the end of the tail with her teeth and slurped it up to Sasuke's lips. She helped push the snake in with her tongue.

Hot damn, Katsuyu thought she just might make it!

Sasuke had to finish the whole thing himself, however. Sakura pulled away. She looked at Sasuke, her cheeks red.

Sasuke swallowed. "Wild," he said.

They smiled.

Katsuyu smiled, too. The two looked so warm, and it irradiated off of them. They just stared, smiling at each other as the sun set behind the blackened trees in the distance. Though they watched each other, like momentarily going cross-eyed, they appeared side by side. The solitary slug wondered if she'd ever find another of her own.

Then Sakura turned her head. Katsuyu had been in thought. Her heart spiked. Sakura's eyes met hers. They lingered. "Katsuyu," the girl said.

"What's," Katsuyu choked. "What's going on?" Sakura stared at her, causing her to shiver.

Sakura moved her face closer to the tiny slug creature. Her eyes went flat. "I'll just drop the pretenses," she said with a monotonous tone. Like a serial killer…. "I'm going to eat you."

Katsuyu screamed.

Sakura burped. "I feel guilty," she said.

"We had to, to absorb more ninja magic so we can construct a new Naruto," Sasuke said. "Besides, they were alternate versions. No harm done!"

"Yay!"

They then did another ritual and made a new Naruto then brainwashed him to tell them how to go Sage Mode.

"So, you just concentrate on nature really hard," Sasuke said. "Idiot, Naruto."

"No, weren't you paying attention, Sasuke?" Sakura asked. "We need magic frogs, too! How are you going to get them?"

"Yeah, forget that. I'm going to just concentrate really hard. Better than Naruto."

He did and went Sage Mode.

"So cool!" Sakura said.

Sasuke smiled.

"Pretty anti-climactic, too," Sakura said. Her lips twisted, and her brows narrowed.

Sasuke glanced away. "Geesh, sorry."

Sakura was still glaring. "Always is with you," she said. "And I kissed you with that snake in your mouth."

"Well, you didn't have to. It was very nice of you. Not my fault I sometimes…"

"Wow, I was just kidding."

She wasn't.

Sometimes.

He knew.

"Well," Sasuke said, "we need to get your chakra blade working right."

"How?"

"I dunno. That's your department."

"I asked you how to create totally new jutsu…."

"Look, I just threw some fire into the atmosphere. Just make up some hand signs after you do something and attach your concentration to them."

Sakura frowned. "Whatever," she said, standing up. She held her fist forward, focusing. It started to glow, then an aura stretched out of it. Her frown seemed to cut through it. The thought gave her some strength, and the energy blew up. She walked to a tree and swung. It crashed, split clean.

Sasuke went to clap sarcastically, but luckily, he had only one arm, so he just looked like a fool. He didn't think Sakura noticed, but she had, and smiled, thinking Sasuke could be a lot more chill than he let on.

"It's not even close to enough, though."

"Goku's wood is too strong, yes."

"What do you think his WHL is?" (Wood Hardness Level).

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. "I dunno," he uttered. "But it's some kind of godly."

"Godly wood," Sakura uttered back. "Do you think the pubes glow too?"

"I don't know, Sakura," Sasuke said. His lips went stern as he looked at her awkwardly. "I just want to make him have to use his full power. We must get stronger for the village."

Sakura stared. "And I must know," she said, "the color of a Super Saiyan's pubes."

Sasuke sighed. "Okay, so we need to teach your blade to cut through fabric, but not dick…"

Sakura lit up. "Yay!"