Linda sighed as she carefully shifted to her left side- the only part of her body that wasn't aching. She bit her lip to keep herself from crying. She was an adult- she wasn't going to cry just because she got shot in the right side and the back. She lost that battle, though, and the tears started falling.
Danny, in his mostly asleep state, thought he heard crying. He scooted closer to his wife and put an arm around her, planting a kiss on her shoulder.
Linda shook as she lifted her hand to her mouth, trying to keep her teeth from shaking. After five minutes, she carefully extracted herself from her husband's arms and padded to the en-suite. She held herself as she shook violently, sinking down to the floor. She felt the contents of her stomach creeping up her throat; she launched for the toilet, opening it quickly. The bile burned her throat as nerves took ahold of her. She felt a hand on her shoulder, lovingly rubbing up and down. She sat on her knees, sighing.
"You okay, baby?" Danny's voice was soft and caring.
Linda shook her head, "I'm sorry."
"Sorry? Sorry for what?"
"Everything," she sniffed.
"It wasn't your fault that that son of a bitch shot at Hector and got you in the crossfire."
"But-"
His arms encircled her, "but nothing. You were doing your job. But I know you know that. So what's really bothering you?"
Linda turned her head, feeling the familiar on stubble on Danny's cheek. "I can't sleep. I keep replaying the scene in my head. If I had ducked sooner, or... I can't sleep cause everything hurts. I can't sleep on my right side, like I want, cause it hurts. And I can't sleep on my back cause there's a bullet in there and it hurts. And my head hurts, and my heart hurts, and-"
"Your heart hurts?"
"Mhmm. It hurts because I can't love you like I want to. It hurts because I'm putting you through all this... crap. And you're fighting with Frank and Erin, and the family's always giving sympathetic looks like, 'we're sorry. We're wondering when you're going to go off the deep end'."
"They don't look at you like that."
"Yes, they do." Linda started crying again, "they look at us like- like they're wa-waiting for y-you to l-leave."
"I'm not going anywhere. I'll never leave you, and I'll always be here for you. No matter what." Danny kissed her cheek before she curled into his side and sobbed on his chest. He rocked her back and forth until her sobs became heavy breathing. "Listen, Linda. I read somewhere that you shouldn't tell people that everything's gonna be okay. Cause sometimes things aren't going to be okay. But that's okay... Linda, you're going through ptsd, and... I understand that. I know that I don't listen always, but I'm here for you-" Danny was surprised when Linda's lips found his.
Linda broke the heavy kiss when air became a necessary, "I love you, Danny Reagan. With all my heart. And I'm sorry I can't show you the way you deserve-"
He pressed his finger to his lips, "you don't have to show it," he pushed her short hair behind her ear. "Not in that way, anyway. You're showing it just by continuing to fight." He kissed her forehead, "Come on, let's go to bed."
Linda nodded and was gently pulled up by Danny. He kept an arm around her as he flushed the contents of Linda's stomach. She felt him slip his arm beneath her knees, and lift her up.
Danny sat Linda down on the bed, "get comfy anyway you want. I can sleep any way that's most comfortable for you... need anything?"
Linda slipped her fingers between the band of Danny's sweatpants and his skin, "just you."
He smirked and bent over, "yes, ma'am." He kissed her lips, praying she'd get better.
