Chapter 96.
Sam followed Cas and Jules into the kitchen. There were candles on the table and counters, giving the room a golden glow. "Nice!" he said.
"The candles were Dean's idea." said Sarah.
Sam glanced at Dean. Something about that felt wrong.
Dean smiled at him. "Special occasion. Right, Cas?"
"Right." said Cas.
"We don't get a lot to celebrate." said Dean, "Pursue joy, right, Sarah?"
"Always." said Sarah.
Cas sat down next to Jules. Sarah sat at the head of the table, Cas to her left. Dean was serving up the soup. Sam sat beside Sarah, leaving the seat opposite her for Dean. When they all had their food, Dean took his place and said, "This is the best soup you will ever taste and this is a happy occasion, so eat, drink and think happy thoughts." He turned to Cas and said, "And I'll know if your thoughts stray from the happy."
"I don't think they will, tonight." said Cas.
Sam wanted to ask Dean about his own thoughts, but he recognised the performance and knew he would not be thanked for questioning it. Instead, he smiled at Jules and said, "Welcome to the family. I guess you're a Winchester now."
"She sure is." said Dean, watching Sarah pour the wine. "Sarah will fill you in on the pros and cons of that. We adopted her too."
Jules accepted her wine with a nod of thanks and took a sip. "I'm grateful to all of you." she said.
"We both are." said Cas, "But I must ask you all to be discreet."
"We always are." said Dean, "But if your recent behaviour didn't put her off, I'm sure no stories we can tell will."
"I mean with others." said Cas, "Not at the bunker, but with outsiders. Nothing must draw Heaven's attention to Jules."
"Fortunately, Heaven has other things to worry about." said Sam.
"What Heaven chooses to focus on can surprise you." said Cas, "What if I am not allowed this?"
"Happy thoughts." said Dean.
"What if this defies the will of Heaven?" Cas went on.
"I'm sick of hearing about the will of Heaven." said Dean.
"If this is wrong ... if this is forbidden to me, the continuance and consummation of our relationship could endanger Jules, even condemn her to death."
"Even if Naomi can spare anyone to carry out that sentence," said Dean, "Which frankly, I doubt, if she or any other of your fraternity come after Jules, I'll do to them what I did to Zachariah."
"What did you do to Zachariah?" said Jules.
"He stabbed him in the face with an angel blade." said Cas.
"Now that's a happy thought." said Jules.
"I mean it." said Dean, "We look after our own."
"If someone will teach me to use an angel blade, I'll gut the bitch myself." said Jules.
"Dean will teach you." said Cas, "But discretion would avoid the need to kill any of my dwindling kind. And if it does come to that, one of Bobby's bullets would do the job more safely."
"These are not happy thoughts." said Dean.
"No, they're not." said Sam, "We'll be careful what we say, Cas. Just relax and be happy with Jules."
Cas smiled. "It occurred to me today, that the only thing in my life right now that doesn't spring from panic or shame is my relationship with Jules." He looked at her. "In fact, panic and shame almost cost me my chance with you. Thanks for your patience."
She put her hand on his. "Some things are worth a little patience."
"All we're missing is Jack." said Sarah.
"We'll bring him next time." said Dean, "We'll have to. He loves you. Can't argue with a nephilim. I make it a rule never to argue with anything that can turn you to a cloud of dust by clicking its fingers."
"Is this a new rule?" said Sam, "Because you've spent decades pissing off people who can do that."
"Jack wouldn't do that anyway." said Cas, "Jack would just be quietly disappointed."
"Yeah." said Dean, "And somehow, that's worse."
They enjoyed the meal for a while in silence and then Cas said to Sarah, "You've always said people can change."
"They can." said Sarah.
"How about angels?"
"As the most evolved of the angels, you need to ask me?" said Sarah.
"I told you it was evolution, not a fall." said Jules.
"If I really am depressed and not just accurate, is there a way to get undepressed and ... " His voice trailed off.
"And believe in road trips and happy endings." said Dean. It wasn't a question and Sam knew the link was allowing Dean to hear what Cas could not easily say.
"Are you finally ready to let go of all that guilt and sorrow?" said Sarah.
"I don't know." said Cas, "I want to. I don't know if I can. I don't know if I should."
"You should." said Dean.
"You can and you should." said Sam.
"Will you help me, Sarah?" said Cas.
"Of course I will, always."
"We all will." said Sam.
Jules took Cas's hand. Sarah took the other, then reached out for Sam's. Sam took hers and then Jules and Sam reached out to Dean, who, with a doubtful smile, completed the circle.
"Let's all promise now," said Sarah, "Whatever's coming, that we will face it together, give our angel the support he needs, guide and protect Sam and Dean, protect and help Jules."
"And get this farm up and running again for Sarah." said Dean.
"We're family, forever." said Sarah.
"Forever." they all said together. Then they returned to the meal.
"So, you wanna believe in road trips?" said Dean to Cas, "Maybe you'll eventually come to believe in me."
Cas looked at him. "I have never not believed in you."
