Learning to Live Again

Chapter 19

Libby had been a bit scared about spending time with Hannah, but Hannah was an absolute joy and seemed thrilled with anything Libby, Sasha and Tamara picked out for her. She was extremely sweet and just adored Mike. Libby's biggest fear was that Hannah would view her as the evil stepmother, and that wasn't what Libby wanted. It appeared anything would have been an improvement over her real mother.

Mike was not at all angry at Libby. He felt horribly about all that Hannah had been through and as more came out about how Kate had tried to protect and help Hannah before her death, he felt even worse. He held a lot of guilt where Kate was concerned, and Libby wasn't sure why. He obviously had loved his oldest daughter dearly and had grieved deeply for her.

While they were out, they went for lunch and then got Hannah's hair trimmed up. The drive home was quiet because Hannah had fallen asleep in the backseat. When they walked into the house, Mike had Abby on his hip and Andy was playing on the floor with Bobby. Joey was sound asleep on the couch.

"Tamara, he pulled a stitch and then had a cramp. I called the doctor and they said it was normal. The muscles are regrowing. He took a pain pill and…well, you see." Mike explained to a very concerned Tamara.

"I was afraid he was overdoing it." Tamara said simply as she walked to the couch where Joey was sleeping. She knelt down and touched his forehead. Joey's eyes popped open and he gave her a weak smile.

"You're back and I can guess that Mike gave you a report?" Joey asked.

"He did, and you are spending the rest of day in bed." Tamara said.

"Best offer I've had all day." Joey remarked.

"I told Daddy I'd give his belly a kiss, but he said it wouldn't help too much." Andy said.

"But I did let you give me a kiss on the cheek and it helped." Joey said. He held an arm out for Andy and Andy rushed up to him and gave him another kiss, this time on his forehead. Andy idolized his dad and didn't understand that he just wasn't feeling good.

"I can help you out to the SUV. Tamara, Andy and Abby both took a good nap. Andy ate a full bowl of mac and cheese, a hamburger and a hotdog. I fixed Abby some instant mashed potatoes and she ate some yogurt too. I also think Bobby gave her a bite of his mac and cheese when I wasn't looking. I found cheese on her chin." Mike said with a grin at Bobby.

"I hope that's okay?" Bobby asked Tamara.

"It is. Did she like it?" Tamara asked.

"Yeah, she gave me a big smile and I cut it up real small so she wouldn't choke." Bobby explained. Mike had handed Abby to Libby and was helping Joey off the couch.

"Maybe next time, you can help me feed her spaghetti. She does most of it all herself. I just cut it in little pieces." Tamara told him as Mike hauled Joey to his feet. Joey was groaning and Mike let him lean on him as they walked out to the car. Libby followed them out while Hannah and Bobby began pulling her new clothes out of the bags.

"You take care of yourself." Libby ordered Joey after she secured Abby into her car seat. Mike had helped Joey into the passenger seat and put the seatbelt on him.

"Remember what I told you about putting a pillow over your stomach. It'll help with the pressure you were describing. And have Tamara pick up those pills I mentioned." Mike told him. Joey nodded and smiled at Tamara, who was thoroughly confused.

"Does he need something?" Tamara asked.

"It's a bit embarrassing." Joey said.

"Its surgery related, but he needs stool softeners. I spoke with the doctor about it and he said you could get them over-the-counter." Mike explained.

"I can follow you out and get them if you want to get home. I think Tom and Sasha are packing up." Libby offered.

"No, I need to stop and get milk anyways. I can get the pills at the grocery store. Joey, are you up for staying in the car with the kids?" Tamara asked.

"Yeah, we'll be alright." Joey said, very sleepy sounding.

"Just let me know if you all need anything." Libby said before giving Joey and Tamara both kisses on their cheeks. Mike shut the car door and they walked to the porch as Joey and Tamara drove away. "I sure hope he'll be alright. I knew he would overdo it." Libby told Mike.

"He's trying to prove himself a good husband and father to Tamara, and in the process, forgets that he is recovering from a very serious injury. I don't think Tamara expects miracles out of him, but he is barely a week out from a stabbing." Mike remarked.

"Too true. Once he gets to feeling better, I would really like to babysit the kids so they can have a date night, before he goes back to work. I think Tamara needs the one-on-one time with her husband after everything." Libby said as Mike put his arm around her and guided her inside. Hannah was taking tags off her new clothes and Bobby was helping her sort them by color and fabric.

"Libby, I know you said everything would have to be washed, so we started taking tags off and separating them. The jeans are a load by themselves, but I wasn't sure about the pajama pants and stuff." Hannah said.

"I'll help you with all that." Libby said as they began picking the clothes up. Mike had picked a shirt up and looked at it suspiciously.

"I don't think this is going to be dad-approved. I can see my hand through it." Mike said. Libby grinned at Hannah and picked up a spaghetti strap cami for under it.

"It will be dad-approved with this under it. And Hannah promised that she would always wear one under it and several of these other shirts." Libby told him.

"Yep, I promise, Dad." Hannah told Mike.

"Alright. Bobby, while the girls are sorting all this; let's go in the living room and get out of their way. Hannah, did you get everything you needed and wanted?" Mike asked as he put his hands-on Bobby's shoulders.

"Yep. Way more than I need, but everything I wanted." Hannah told him sweetly.

"Good. Bobby, the race is on. Channel four. Get settled and I'll pop some popcorn." Mike told the little boy, who ran for the living room. He loved watching car races with Mike.

"Mike, I have all the receipts in my wallet. I'll get them out for you, but Hannah is quite the bargain shopper. It seems like we got her a lot, but we got good prices. We also got her a new bedspread, sheets, curtains and a rug." Libby explained.

"That's perfectly fine. I intended that you do." Mike answered before walking into the kitchen and putting the popcorn in to pop.

"While the boys are watching the race cars driving around in circles, we'll get your bedroom fixed up and see what is still needed. I'm glad you picked such mature stuff. It'll grow with you." Libby said as she and Hannah began loading things into the washer.

"That sounds great. I was okay with-it last night, but its nice to have a space of my own. I haven't in a long time. Even before, I shared with Kate; and Mom did matching everything." Hannah explained.

"It was probably easier since you shared, but since you have that room to yourself; we can let you pick your stuff out." Libby told her.

"Is my dad okay? He seemed really sad when I talked about Kate." Hannah asked.

"He's really missing her. He thinks that he didn't treat her well enough, considering that she was trying to protect you." Libby told her quietly.

"She wanted to tell him really badly, but Mom always seemed to swoop in. Kate just didn't know how to, and it frustrated her. I think she took that out on Dad, because there was something, she wanted to tell him, but she never could. She loved him a lot." Hannah told her as she put detergent into the washer.

"In a lot of ways, your dad is still very much grieving for Kate and Lucas. He never got much of a chance before he retired, and now he has to find a way through the grief and pain. He feels a lot of guilt because he knows that your mom mistreated you, and has just found that she mistreated your older sister. He feels that he should have protected you both." Libby explained.

"He did his best given our circumstances. When he was home, it was better and when he was gone, Kate and I lived for and prayed for the day he came home." Hannah told her.

"And that is not how he would have wanted you to feel. He would have wanted you to have a happy childhood all the time." Libby said. They left the laundry room and walked to Hannah's bedroom, the same room that Libby had only recently stayed in.

"It is what it is. I just hate that Mom died so unhappy. I realize she created a lot of her own unhappiness, and Dad did everything he could to make her happy; but if she had been happier, I think she might have been a lot nicer." Hannah said. She was stripping the bed while Libby began hanging the new curtains.

"Probably, but some people are just not happy people. Its how they are wired. You can't fix it for them, but you can stay yourself, and not let their actions affect you. And yes, I am saying that from experience." Libby told her.

"I thought so. Bobby is a happy person. I know he is a foster child, but he sure loves you and Dad." Hannah said.

"He is and he will grow to love you. Bobby is very accepting." Libby assured her.

"He reminds me a lot of Lucas. I know Dad isn't trying to replace Lucas, but I think that is part of the reason why Dad loves him so much. I just hope me being here doesn't derail the adoption. I am afraid of that." Hannah remarked.

"I'm sure it won't." Libby said.

"I hope not. I'll talk to the social workers and judge if I need to." Hannah offered.

"Okay. So, I think your dad is going to get you enrolled in school tomorrow. You'll start either tomorrow or Tuesday. You ready?" Libby asked.

"I think so. I really loved school in Florida." Hannah answered as she put the bedspread over the bed.

"Good. I know some of the teachers over at the high school. All very nice. Do you like sports or music? Art, maybe?" Libby asked.

"I love art but couldn't ever do much with it in the group home. There wasn't a lot left for hobbies." Hannah explained.

"I see. Well, we will see what we can do. Alright, much better and more for a teen girl. Let's go watch the cars drive around in circles." Libby teased. She hated racing, but the men in her new family loved it. They walked into the living room and Hannah sat down beside Bobby, and Libby positioned herself next to Mike, and he wrapped an arm around her, and they snuck a kiss.

They sat like that for the rest of the afternoon. Tom and Sasha left in the early evening hours, and Mike opted to order pizza rather than make Libby cook. He and Bobby went and got it and some soda while Libby worked on some grading. Hannah put her clothes away and brought something out before Mike got home.

"Libby, I have had this for years and I think Dad needs it. Kate had it and wanted me to have it. I think Dad gave it to her for a birthday." Hannah explained as she handed a charm bracelet to Libby. Libby immediately noticed the 'Daddy's Girl' charm.

"Are you sure? This was a gift from your sister." Libby asked.

"I am. First it was a gift from Dad to her. Its time it goes back to Dad. I think he needs to feel a connection to Kate. This is all I have to help him." Hannah said.

"Well, I think you need to give it to him." Libby said.

"Okay. I just don't know how to." Hannah said.

"I'll try and give you an opportunity. Maybe when Bobby is getting ready for bed." Libby suggested. Just then Mike and Bobby came through the door. Hannah slid the bracelet into her pocket and smiled at them. Mike wasn't just carrying pizza and soda, but a store-bought birthday cake and Bobby had a gift bag in his hand.

"We're a day late, but we thought a little birthday party was in order." Mike said before sitting the items down and giving Hannah a big hug. Bobby was just thrilled to have another piece of birthday cake so soon after Libby's birthday.

"You didn't have to give me anything. You already bought all the clothes and stuff." Hannah said, obviously shocked.

"I picked it out! And your cake too. I hope you like strawberry with white frosting!" Bobby said, jumping up and down.

"I love it!" Hannah said, giving Bobby a high five. Mike had released her, and Libby grabbed plates and forks.

"Let's eat the pizza and then we'll have cake. I have some ice cream too in there. While I'm dishing things up, why don't you open your present, Hannah?" Libby suggested and Hannah grabbed the bag. She opened it and pulled the tissue away and smiled at the jewelry box inside.

"Its birthstone earrings!" Bobby shouted and Mike groaned.

"Teach me to take him with me when I go shopping for birthday, anniversary or Christmas presents." Mike said.

"I love them! Thank you, Daddy." Hannah said as she leaned down and gave Mike a kiss on the cheek and then gave Bobby a hug. Not even twenty-four hours after Hannah had come back into the picture, she and Bobby were developing a very sweet relationship.

"Your welcome, sweetie. Let's eat up." Mike said as they all sit down and began passing around plates for pizza. As they laughed and joked, Libby was beginning to realize she was finding herself being part of a family. Sure, she had always been a part of Joey's, but the family she was building with Mike was her own. She could only hope he felt the same, because the idea of divorce after adoption was becoming very unappealing.