[a/n]Son of is now officially all grown up and of legal age. And I've got a solid 40 in the queue. Just wrote a quickie idea of Harry taking Percy to task for CoS failings.

Harry Does Different CCCXI

Dumpy

"Stamps all over the bloody thing." Uncle Vernon grumped as he turned the envelop over "Never seen the like."

Harry immediately recognized the writing from Hogwarts "That's from my friend Ron's mother, Mrs. Weasley."

"Your sort?" he almost dropped the package in distaste "What's wrong with her anyway?"

Harry shrugged "What's the matter? Not enough postage?"

"Watch your lip boy!" Uncle Vernon snapped back "Who is she?"

Harry thought how best to describe his friends "Mmmm…you met them. At the train station. Big friendly family. Colorful clothes. Red hair, I guess that's their trademark."

"Ahh! Now I do remember! The dumpy lady!" Vernon exclaimed as though retrieving a long lost thought. "Well boy? Why would she be writing me?"

Harry's answered in reverse "Well, it's addressed to you and Aunt Petunia, not me. And dumpy? Really? Ever look in a mirror? Or at Diddikins?"

"What's that supposed to mean?" demanded Dudley, doing an impressive job of matching his father's coloring.

Harry snorted and waved a hand at both Dursley males "Him calling Mrs. Weasley dumpy? Hahaha! What a joke! I mean come on! Ever look in a mirror? He's wider than he is tall. And Dudders you're right behind him. Ooh bet that hurt." The wizard had dodged a punch that went on to make a minor dent in the drywall behind him.

"Mummmmmmmiiiiiiiiiiiiieeeeeeee!" Dudley was whimpering and cradling his hand that was already turning purple.

Vernon was reading the letter "What's this quid-dok thingy?"

"Quidditch." Harry corrected automatically "We play it on brooms at Hogwarts - -"

His uncle shook the letter violently "Ah-ah-ah not another word! Apparently they want you to leave for the rest of the summer. Don't see any reason we should make you happy. Just hurt Dudley."

"I should let him hit me?" Harry was incredulous. And added sarcastically "Either way I'll be with dumpy people, right Uncle? She's skinny as a snake by comparison. Remember snakes Diddy?" he raised his eyebrows tauntingly.

Dudley whimpered more. Whether fear of the snake memory or the pain his knuckles were in?

Vernon snarled "Fine brat! Shaddup! We'll be happier with you outta here too. Write back you can go. The sooner the better."

"Cool." Harry grinned happily. He toyed with the thought of sharing with the Weasleys, particularly Fred and George, that Uncle Vernon called Mrs. Weasley 'dumpy' but opted to tuck the bit of juiciness away for future use. He settled for giving his cousin a slight poke in the belly and quipping softly "Dumpy."