"Finally, Piper," Jess teased as I got out of the car in front of her house, "Nice Range Rover, when you said your loaded wife spoils you, I didn't think you meant this spoiled. How rich is she?"
"Enough. And this isn't even the most important way she spoils me or the most visible anymore," I told her as I flicked my ring in her direction.
"Can I," she asked as she reached for my hand to admire the gleaming rock on my finger.
"Uhm, we dated, we nearly slept together. You weren't nervous to put your hands wherever you wanted when we were nineteen."
"I just don't want it to be weird. I don't know how things are with Alex. From what I know about her she's the possessive type."
"I know it's cliché but it's true, she's different with me. And it's so refreshing. Larry was so controlling. He never trusted me but expected me to trust him. Alex's best friend and business partner is her ex-girlfriend and I had a kid with someone else, we had to start from a place of trust that most relationships don't. We both had babies we loved, lives with other people but now our lives have melded together beautifully. Our relationship is almost too healthy sometimes if that's possible. I mean we still have our explosions and as Diane reminded me about an hour ago our son knows a lot of things that he shouldn't, but she is the most amazing partner. It's so refreshing after everything I've been through since that night with you when I was a total chicken shit."
"You just weren't ready. I was nineteen when I said those things. I don't think them anymore. I understand that bisexuality is a valid identity. I just wanted to see you happy and doing what you wanted. I didn't want you to settle for what anybody else told you that you should have or want. Still don't and still never will. I knew your worth from the first time I asked you to coffee."
"You were justifiably angry. I would have said what you did if I had been you. So that thing about picking a side?"
"Call yourself what you want just if that woman treats you as good as you say she does then you cherish her twice as much as she does you. Cause I don't know how she exists, let alone how you were the one lucky enough to bag that goddess and wife her up but you were and it couldn't have happened to a better person. I just didn't want to see you settle. I know how amazing you are. You are funny and sweet and still the best kisser I've ever known."
"Should I tell your wife that?"
"She already knows if I weren't with her, I would be with you in a second. I've only ever truly loved two people. Piper, one of the things that brought you and I together when we were sophomores at Smith was that we loved the same way, with the same loyalty and intensity. We don't fall out of love with people if we truly love them."
"And if I weren't with my wife, I'd probably consider it. Sometimes I wondered how my life would have been different if I had made a different choice that night when we came so close."
"You wouldn't have gotten knocked up at like twenty-three, that's for sure."
"I'm not sure that's a plus or not. I can't imagine living in a world without my silly monkey boy. He makes everyone he encounters so happy and playful, even Nicky who had never even remotely liked a kid or enjoyed spending time with one in her life until she met Geo. She still claims she won't change diapers, but I know the first time her nieces cry and their mommies are busy, she'll be looking for the diapers and wipes before even previewing the contents of the diaper. And Alex is my soulmate. I was meant for her."
"And Ashlyn is mine. She helped me glue those last broken pieces back together after you. Cause, bitch, you broke my fucking heart but I'm sure I'm not the only one, especially now cause no man or woman or whatever else in between can compete with the goddess you married. If you can get that then us mere mortals don't stand a chance. You are probably only going to break more hearts now."
"Oh yeah, every time I kiss my wife in public somebody's heart breaks and some dude loses a boner."
"Speaking from experience, I wouldn't be so sure of the second one. You two kissing is hotter than any porn I've ever watched."
"There might be a reason but I'm not about to tell you outside."
"God, I wish we could just get drunk and stupid like the old days before you decided Polly was your college best friend and not me. What happened to that lovely individual anyway? I was surprised when I got to your wedding and she wasn't there," Jess asked as she grabbed my bag from me and watched to make sure I made it up her front steps okay and into the house.
"You were right and then some," I choked out before I burst into tears as I fell into her couch.
"Oh, sweetie, that's nothing anybody wants to be right about. I'm going to get some wine, what would you like? Tea?"
"Well, I'd like wine but I don't think my daughters would appreciate it as much as I would, so neither would I. So green tea would be great with a little honey."
"You act like I've never made you tea before or you've changed over the decade plus that I've known you."
"Well considering that I'm carrying my wife's babies I think I've changed a teensy bit."
"I don't know if I would say that constitutes a twist in your story. I'm still not sure I buy the bisexual thing in your case, but I will respect however you choose to self-identify. You are the dykey one in your marriage, just in case nobody has made you aware of that fact."
"What cause I'm into sports and don't have those typical feminine nurturer qualities?"
"Those are two of many reasons. It's not a bad thing. We'll talk about that next. And maybe you'll elaborate on your earlier porn comment. We have all night."
"Where's Ash?"
"She decided to spend some time with her sister, she's meeting us for brunch tomorrow and then we can spend the afternoon together. Is that going to be a problem with your wife? You know, us being alone together?"
"No. She's spending time unattended with her best friend all weekend. And their thing ended like five or six years ago, well Nicky told me they fucked once after a party three years ago but I've never asked Alex about it cause it was before we got together, they were drunk, horny and neither found anything better to play with. Once they opened Artemis, they agreed they couldn't fuck anymore and Nicky told her that she needed to find someone who wanted something serious. But at that point, Alex had made up her mind that she was done with women and sex and just wanted to have her baby. To create a perfect being to worship her, as if that was somehow healthier but it's also what she knows. Lucky for me she realized she was just done with unhealthy sexual entanglements."
"A woman like that has no business being Ace."
"Yeah, that's about as hilarious as me thinking I had any business giving frat boys blow jobs so they wouldn't stick their dick other places."
"Yeah, you're bisexual. Sure, Piper. Do you want to order dinner or go out?"
"Can we just order in? I just want to relax on the couch. These girls like to shift positions every time I get comfortable. I don't even like going out to eat with my wife."
"I wouldn't either. I wouldn't even like going to eat in the dining room if I could fuck a woman like your sex goddess of a wife whenever I wanted," she teased before turning serious as I rolled my eyes and shook my head at her, "If you need anything let me know," she told me soothingly.
"Well, my wife does give me a massage every night. She's probably drinking whiskey out of the bottle and playing poker with her ex, I don't think she'd have a problem with one little massage as long as I wear a sports bra and panties."
"Yes, because we've never been there before," Jess answered sarcastically from her kitchen.
"Funny, bitch."
"You know you love me."
"If I knew that this would be my house."
"I thought we agreed it wouldn't. And I've seen the pictures of Castle de Vauses and damn, bitch. That place was like a home out of a magazine before you chose to spend what I spent on my home remodeling it, oh sorry customizing it to your unique needs as lesbian giant and her bisexual princess bride," Jess teased as she put a crudité platter in front of me and an iced green tea with just enough honey and lemon garnished with a honey straw, she really didn't forget anything about my likes and dislikes from my college days.
"So, tell me about Polly. What happened? How long have you been out of contact?"
"After college and I moved to New York she came to visit, just before I met the idiot. She loved it so she never left. She moved into my apartment in Brooklyn and we went out meeting guys and I waited tables while she looked for jobs in sales and marketing. We started making soap in my apartment, just for fun and then she got the idea, really I think our friends told her, that we could make a lot of money selling it. Right around that time, I met Larry and he had a friend named Pete who Polly fell in love with and now has a son with and is married to. I wasn't sure I wanted any of it. But she convinced me this was what women dreamed of. I had the perfect guy who all my friends envied and now I had the opportunity to be a female entrepreneur. To have real power and that I didn't need to go to NYU. That I could have a great life without it. I still felt a pull to these fuzzy dreams I had but I gave in. I listened to her instead of myself. We started the business, I moved in with the idiot and she and Pete kept my old apartment. Within a few months, I was knocked up and I didn't want to be. Then I found out I was further along then I thought I was and while I could choose not to have the baby it wouldn't be as simple as I had been hoping for. And I didn't want to take the risk that this could be my only chance to have a child. But still, I didn't really want it and wasn't totally sure I wanted kids. I knew Larry didn't. But I hoped he was just one of those guys who just doesn't like other people's kids. He wasn't. He will never like kids or being around them. He did it to please his mother. But his mother wanted a perfect little Jewish boy and she was more harsh than necessary towards him. She used to beat my son with a wooden spoon while saying horrible things about me and it got worse after she figured out I was 'a fucking dyke who wanted to steal her son's seed' as she called me the last time I saw her. I did not want his sperm in me, that was his idea. I liked his dick. I liked how it made me feel and what it did for me. I liked having dick in cunt sex with him but that doesn't mean I wanted him to put a baby in me. A girl can just want to have sex with a cute, sweet boy and not be a slut or trying to get pregnant. So Geo was born and Polly tried to be supportive but she felt she had to compete with me and do whatever I did better. So she married Pete out of spite when Geo was almost three months old. They just had a small courthouse ceremony with me, Larry, her sister and Pete's best mate. She then convinced him to stop using condoms a month before their wedding, she had already secretly stopped using her birth control. Three months later, she announced that she was fourteen weeks pregnant and gave birth 'early' or so she claimed to a seven-pound baby boy when Geo was almost ten months old. But she loved her company more than him and Pete didn't want to be tied down so when Geo was around one, he got snipped and it improved their marriage or so she claimed. But still she kept telling me I should marry Larry, even though she had seen him yell at me and physically abuse me. She always told me 'he's just drunk' or 'you shouldn't have been checking other people out' or anything else I did that made him jealous or unhappy or 'you hit him first'. It was never his fault. I had always done something wrong to provoke him. He was a good man, a sweet guy and he was cute. And pretty good in bed or so I thought until I had my first orgasm literally at the hands of Alex Vause and realized I had no clue about sex and how it was supposed to feel. Plus, he was my baby's father and my son deserved to have his father in his life. My friends and my family agreed on that much and that rarely happened. So I believed all that. So I accepted it. I listened to her. Even as I started feeling progressively drawn to not only men but women. I would go on dates when we were on a break. I had a lot of anonymous sex and some not so anonymous sex with guys trying to fuck everything away. But Polly wasn't there. Her only advice was I needed to make things work with Larry. I was suicidal because I couldn't go on anymore. She downplayed it or said I couldn't possibly be serious. When you are asking your best friend if she would be the guardian for your kid, it's a realistic plan. A real friend would have said let's check you into the hospital and get you help but she didn't. She said of course she would always take care of Geo if I needed to take some time to figure out how to make things work with Larry. I was past that point by then. I was getting drunk on wine and watching lesbian stuff online, then it turned into porn and neglecting my son's needs during the night. I couldn't be a mother and that's when Polly's idea of helping was to tell Larry how bad things were with my alcohol and homosexual fantasies, knowing he would try to make my worst fear come true and take him because as she said, 'I was becoming an alcoholic lesbo and it was only a matter of time before I found some powdered alcohol. And I was using benzos and Ambien but still as prescribed. She was certain I would end up hooked on Coke or street drugs. Probably not an untrue assertion since I couldn't die but couldn't live either. Larry sued me for custody so I took every penny I had and found a lawyer, I didn't tell the lawyer at this point that I was bisexual but she suggested therapy, to make it look like I was working on my issues when we went to court. The director at Geo's old school told me about her friend-"
"Let me guess, her friend's name was Dr. Alex Vause?"
"Bingo. So, and this part is just between us, I emailed her and she emailed me back. And she just had this way of making me feel better and reassuring me. She was gentle and the first person to ever just listen. She never really gave me advice, she let me talk myself into the answers. She never judged me or told me things were my fault. Then we started just talking about everything under the sun. Our conversations became about movies and books and music instead of me. She didn't tell me much about herself at that point, but she had already broken the therapeutic relationship we were building and let me in more than a professional should. But I didn't mind. Looking back, I can find the moment she developed a crush on me and after that everything became about making me fall for her as she was for me."
"Looks like whatever she did worked since you ended up with her egg in your womb."
"Nope just bumped into her one day, our abs slammed together and I guess I hit an ovary too hard too close to my uterus and bam, embryo then whoops it split and turned into two fetuses because my wife is part mutant or something equally not-quite human and this egg has all her best genes," I joked.
"Yes and next you are gonna tell me that you tripped and fell and your tongue just happened to land in her vagina."
"No, but that is how her dick ended up there."
"I like this new Piper. She's fun without four shots of tequila. Go on and we'll get back to our favorite psychiatrist since Lucy started asking for nickels."
"Of course, I fell for Alex. I fell for her before I knew what she looked like. I fell for her personality, heart, and spirit, I just got lucky that she wasn't butt ass ugly. And Polly didn't like it. And she really didn't like it when I told her I planned on raising Geo with Alex. She thinks a boy needs his father and thought that I should accept full responsibility for my irresponsible actions and marry the man who got me pregnant. I didn't want my son to end up with a dead mother and I knew either he would end up beating me to death accidentally, I'd end up overdosing on pills and alcohol or killing myself to end it all because I couldn't take it. I loved my son too much. I didn't love myself but I loved my son and he loved me. I knew I had to do what was best for him and I knew that was Alex. She called her some horrible things and said some homophobic crap. She never wanted to try to see the Alex I saw, that I loved. She believed what people said about her and I know she did enough damage around Northampton that you know what those things are, even though you've never mentioned it."
"If I believed a word of it, I'd be the first to say and you know it. I have some questions and you know I'm gonna get some answers before the night is through. I've always tried to protect you, Piper. You are so trusting and don't make great decisions when it comes to Piper and what you deserve. I like Alex, in every sense of the word. And I really did hope Polly would be able to give you what you needed that I evidently couldn't. I would never have let you live with a man who hit you and we took the same classes and went to the same rallies, there's never a good reason for a man to hit a woman or force her to do anything. I'm not saying women should be absolved of their bad behavior simply for chromosomes and body parts but that men have power that women never will. Men are pit bulls, women are chihuahuas, both can dole out some pretty gnarly bites but one is still more deadly by virtue of breeding. Did he hit you when you were pregnant?"
"He started abusing me when I was pregnant. When I decided not to have a late surgical abortion because I was worried about how it would affect me in the future. I didn't want kids in my early twenties, cause who really does but I didn't want to find myself in ten years unable to have them, I wanted the option. That theoretical choice mattered more to me than the very real choice I had to make. And now that I have these girls growing inside me, I know I made the right one. He would tell me he hoped I lost the thing or that it had the good sense to strangle itself in my belly. He didn't seem to care that then I would have to go through induction to push out a dead baby. That was my problem, not his. He never understood the physical toll a live baby had on my body, I couldn't ask him to you know," I paused as I couldn't say the words when I could feel my daughters swimming in my belly.
"Yeah to understand what a dead one would do to you. That your body would do everything it was designed to do for a live baby but with nothing to show for it."
"He was repulsed by my body but he was faithful so when he needed sex, he fucked me without caring about my comfort until he was satisfied."
"Did he rape you?"
"I never said no and he was the father of my child."
"Doesn't mean he can't be your rapist too. You know what the definition of the term is."
"He had sex with me when I didn't want it with implied consent, we'll say that."
"Sweetie, I'm so sorry," she reached for my hand and ran her finger along the hills and valleys of my knuckles as she held my palm tightly, "I always knew you were one of the strongest willed people I had ever met. I never wanted to think you could have to be that strong. How long was Polly around after you got serious with Alex?"
"Last January, Geo and I moved in with Alex. I left the business Polly and I started, I sold my shares to Polly with Alex's money and went to work starting Alex's foundation and overseeing her businesses. I was already a marketing and community outreach consultant for her therapy practice. Now I'm the Executive Director of the Artemis Foundation and Marketing and Community Outreach Director at Artemis Health. I also own a third of Vause Investment Ventures, her real estate and remodeling business and venture capital firm. And I'm in charge of brand identity and digital/social media marketing for the company. She calls me the Chief Marketing Officer. Her mom runs the office. But after I left, I didn't talk to Polly again. She made it clear she wanted nothing to do with me and didn't want me to influence her son to be queer like me or think men are unnecessary," I explained as I settled back down and for the first time in a long time, my heart felt truly free as she dropped my hand into my lap and went to make us some coffee.
"Did she know about your plans to have children with Alex," she asked when she came back with two steaming mugs and a big bottle of organic creamer tucked in her arm.
"No. I had barely learned about the embryo that became these girl's existence back then. Alex and I had discussed having a house full of kids but I wasn't about to tell Polly that and make things worse. I was happy and done with the drama and pleasing everybody else. With being the Piper everybody else wanted me to be and fearing if I wasn't nobody would love me. Alex loved my true self. My son did. And when my family saw how happy Alex made Geo and I so did they," I explained as I poured creamer into my coffee and took a sip.
"You left me off that list, sweetie. I always loved you for the amazing person you are. So does that mean there's an open position in your life," she asked as she tested her coffee and reached for two stone coasters.
"That depends. Are you putting in an application," I asked as I playfully shoved her arm.
"Yes. I want to be your best friend. I want to show you how a sister is supposed to be. Cause Polly never treated you like a sister. But I knew you wouldn't listen, that you would have to find out for yourself. So I resolved that when you did, I would be around no matter how much it hurt," she told me as she returned my nudge.
"Of course. I invited you to my wedding because I wanted you to see just how right you were and to say thank you and sorry. You were a big part of making that day happen," I told her as she put some relaxing music on in the background.
"So are you going to ever go to NYU? Wouldn't it be like free now," she asked as we kept sipping at our coffees once she sensed I was ready to change the topic of conversation.
"Yeah, I can go for free. I'm applying to Gallatin for a Ph.D. in the spring. Right now, bringing these girls into the world and getting them through their first months is my priority. I'll probably have the next one while I'm in school but at least I'll have that time with our first kids together and that will never happen again. I want to spend as much time as I can with her, especially seeing Alex and Diane and wanting to do everything I can to cultivate the good parts of that in my own life with our daughters. Especially since I know how badly Alex wants that too and all she went through to make it happen."
"How many more are there?"
"Sixteen. Nine female and seven male."
"You aren't planning on having all sixteen, are you?"
"If I could without ruining my body and risking my life and theirs I would. I love and desire every part of my wife and those embryos are an important part of her. I had very different feelings on the subject until the moment I looked at the pictures of my lover's embryos, when they were clumps of her before I even knew she nearly died trying to create them. They are hers and any of them that choose to grow in my womb will be ours. But usually half don't survive the thaw, so the chances are we'll get four if we use all the embryos," I told her as I felt Baby B kick, "and no more decide to split," I added.
"The thought of having one baby just growing and pissing inside me is so weird, I couldn't imagine carrying twins. Not that I can't imagine the good things too. The amazing shit."
"I never thought I would either."
"I never imagined you'd be a mother but here you are lounging on my couch with a swollen belly and your toddler at grandma's house a few miles away."
"I'm still not very good at it. I'm a great parent, I'm just not a mother. I'm not very maternal. I guess I fit better into the more paternal role where I provide the basics but I'm lost when it comes to everything else. I'm not nurturing. I'm not the one who is going to make everything a fun game. I'll take my kid to the park, teach him how to throw a ball and that kind of stuff. But when it comes to cooking and bath time and skinned knees beyond slapping on a bandage I have no clue. I used to wonder how other moms did it, how it came so easy. I hated them but then I saw Alex and Diane with Geo and they were so natural. Even they don't know how they do it. It's second nature to them but to me, it's a struggle. I love my kids and with a supportive partner who I made the deliberate, knowing choice to pursue an activity that could result in pregnancy, I love it. Everybody who sees us thinks Alex is the bio mom of Geo, I think they just figure he looks like his donor. We're obviously a lesbian couple so nobody questions that she has this kid who she seems to be the mother of who looks nothing like her. And I look too young to be the mom of a preschooler. It'll be interesting when the kids do look like her and they have a biological tie. I corrected people the first few times but then Geo told me when I was putting him to bed one night, 'Mommy, I don't mind when people think I come from Momma belly. I know I come from your belly and I love you both so much. You both my mommies, it doesn't matter which belly I come from.' After that, I let people think whatever they wanted about the true nature of my relationship and our family. That kid has a way of kicking my ass and putting things into perspective. I told Diane that once shortly after that particular incident and how sometimes I was convinced I needed him more than he could ever need me and all she said was 'Yeah, I know, mine too.'"
"That's an amazing kid. He's a smart one."
"Yeah, he is. He's a sweet boy. Even after seeing everything he did his first nearly two years of life. He's so good-natured. I don't know where he gets it from."
"I'm looking right at her. You've been through some shit and I thought that just from what you told me when we were in college, before you told me what you've been through since graduating from Smith. And you still have so much love and believe people are good. And you are a woman, you can't be paternal. You are just a mother in your own way and got lucky to find a partner, a woman who fills in those places where you just aren't skilled. You are a great mom. I can tell just by seeing you with Geo and how your hand hasn't left your belly the whole time we've been talking. The way you beam and gush when you talk about your kids. You are a mom. Maybe you aren't the mom who bakes cookies but you'll be the mom cheering loudest at their soccer games and the mom at their matches all the kids hate until they take your advice and the next game they decimate the whole team. Cause we both know you are a damn good coach. And a kid needs that kind of nurturing as much as they need cookies and a mom to be goofy and playful and patient. You make tiny humans and you are obviously good at it. That's a mother. I'd like to see a man carry twins for five minutes."
"I've dated plenty of man-children and yeah they couldn't handle a day of this and go to work ten to twelve hours a day nauseous and tired the whole time."
"Aren't you in the second trimester?"
"Hate to break it to you but it can last all pregnancy, all day. Twins make it worse. I was barely sick with our son but this pregnancy, I'm sick constantly. Are you guys still looking into it?"
"We want to do it but it's too expensive. Now we're looking into just both doing IUI or trying at-home insemination."
"If it's what you want then I'm sure Alex wouldn't mind if I helped you pay for it. She knows what you did for me and she knows how rewarding and challenging building a family is."
"Thanks, Piper," she answered as she scrolled through her phone while we reminisced about our favorite local restaurants. After we chose a place and the food both arrived and was consumed she grabbed a pillow and leaned against the other arm of her couch.
"So now that we've gotten through all the emotional and reminiscing stuff, let's get to the fun stuff. Is anything off-limits on the subject of Dr. Alex Vause?"
"Depends. Ask whatever you want to ask and I'll answer if I think Alex would be cool with it. I want you to trust her and what we have."
"I already do that, I'm just curious about some things."
"Such as?"
"Let's start with what I do believe about the things people say about the woman you call your wife and if you are into, I find shocking. Is she really into leather and BDSM and are you?"
"Uhm, yeah. She lives for leather couches, four-poster beds, and red lipstick. The second time I came over to her place I told her how nice her bed was. How soft and comfy it is. She glared at me and told me that wasn't the point and back then I didn't know any better so I, of course, asked what the point was and after a couple rounds of are you sures and yeses I found myself blindfolded with my limbs tied to the bed and her lips and hands doing whatever they wanted before she went down on me with the blindfold off. Just when I thought she had no more tricks, without losing her rhythm on my pussy she untied the blindfold right before she let me cum. I had never watched anyone give me an orgasm but that day she kept fucking me until I learned to keep my eyes open when the master was at work on her favorite muse. And now I love to watch myself get fucked or made love to. It just makes everything so much more intense."
"I bet you were walking crooked for a while after that."
"Oh, I was. We gradually ramped things up over time and I became both her play partner and lover, which was new for her. Usually, they were two different kinds of women but we work because she can find both parts in me."
"What about you? Why does she work for you?"
"Cause she melds and plays with gender and roles so well. She's so fluid in all the ways I find exciting. She looks good in anything and no matter how much makeup or product she puts in her hair. I could talk to her for hours or even just sit in her presence and watch her read a book. The first time I thought she didn't want me there, that she wanted her time and she did but she wanted to fit me into her world. I got used to it and realized that's all I've ever really wanted, to have someone fit me into their world. To come together as two whole people. I didn't want to be somebody's world or have somebody be mine, I wanted a partner. But I also craved adrenalin and Alex gives me all of that. And it helps that she lets me fuck her tits and do things to her ass."
"Piper Elizabeth! What would your mother think? I know that she knows about you and Alex but does she know about that?"
"What the part where Alex ties me up? Where she's my dom and I'm her pet? Or the part that would shock the whole world, that Alex Vause, great lesbian BDSM-positive sex therapist and infamous dyke leather top lets her wife fuck whatever body part she wants, however, she wants to fuck it from their first night together?"
"Damn, Piper. What happened to the sweet girl who wouldn't let me make love to her?"
"Well, maybe you should have tied me up first and not given me the option of running. Especially since, unlike Alex the first time she tied me up, you knew how good of a runner I am."
"I could, I would never and I didn't think that was something you wanted. Were you scared the first time she did it?"
"The leaves were falling, I was falling in love with my soulmate and nothing else mattered. I trusted her and wanted her to open my world up. I knew she was the one who could guide me out of my misery and help me explore who Piper was and come to terms with myself. I was nervous, of course. I liked her but I had never been all that into sex and really wasn't into oral. Turns out I just have exceptionally high standards. The first time her tongue swiped along my pussy I felt like I could fly. The whole fireworks and earth moving were real. It was even better once she realized I like it when she plays with her food a little bit first. That touching my pussy isn't the be all end all main goal."
"You still like that spot on your inner thigh touched and kissed, don't you?"
"And Alex found another one behind my right ear. And she likes to kiss it in public knowing what it does to me."
"What's her spot? I won't tell. Anything you say tonight is between us, merely for my own curiosity."
"The spot where her cleavage starts. I kiss there and I can get whatever I want. She loves when I touch her left cheek when we kiss. When I rest my head on her shoulder. What really kills her is when I massage her scalp, especially when she's having a little snack and finds a spot her little power bottom doesn't want her to ever leave."
"Does she really have a box of dicks? A pleasure chamber? A closet that makes her a virtual lesbian Christian Grey?"
"Oh, she does. And other assorted toys. She's acquired a lot of new ones since we started sleeping together, including a double-sided dildo."
"What? Everybody knows Alex Vause doesn't do penetration! That's more than a rumor, it's a fact she has acknowledged every time the topic comes up!"
"Yes, and she did with me but she likes it from me and at first only if she's inside me at the same time or using it to fuck me. It adds a degree of realness and closeness because then we don't need a harness and it really feels like her dick inside my vagina making us both cum."
"Well, I guess we know where baby dolls come from now. Are you sure these girls aren't going to come out with like silicone instead of human flesh covering their insides?"
"We made love like good little vanilla lesbians the night they were 'made.'"
"How do you decide that?"
"The night before our embryo transfer, we had passionate sex in a bubble bath with candles and lots of fingers and kisses. Then we went to bed and the next morning I was technically pregnant. Although they would have been conceived on Halloween and that lovemaking was anything but sweet and gentle. She had me bent over the counter in our bathroom and made me watch her fuck me with an eight-inch dildo until I took every inch of it and then proceeded to tie me up and fuck me again while I was still raw. To make it even more torturous, she didn't let me make a sound but she could groan and tell me how tight I was and generally say anything she wanted. But of course, I was the one tugging at her hips to keep her inside me and then pulling her hair to keep her tongue on my clit after her dick got so tired it couldn't hold it's erection and the damn thing was molded that way. Yet can never match my stamina in the bedroom. Hell, I even exhaust the great sex-fiend that is Alex Vause."
"No way! Dr. Five Chicks in a Night?"
"Oh, that's not the most she's ever had in a night. Even her mom knows that."
"Her mom cool with it?"
"She is now. I mean no mom would be cool with coming home and seeing her ten-year-old having sex with a thirteen-year-old, who was actually fourteen but only I know that. She always knew Alex was gay and that never mattered but how out and sex-positive she was worried her getting assaulted for the way she lives her life and the things she says. And she pictured getting that call. She still does. She was surprised the first time she caught me on top of Alex kissing her and the first time she heard Alex having an uncontrollable orgasm. And the first time she asked so where's Piper when we were in bed with the door to our room or hers at her mom's partially open and my head was between her legs under the sheet. And of course, being Alex Vause she had to say, 'having breakfast.'"
"What did Diane say? Cause I know what my mom would say if I made that joke."
"She told her to stay out of her kitchen if that was her idea of making breakfast for her girlfriend. And she's learned never to ask us if we want to go out to eat for obvious reasons. She rolls her eyes, sighs and shakes her head. It's entertaining. But that time she just closed the door. And I knew better than to let up or chuckle the least bit unless I wanted to get her teeth and claws on my skin in a not entirely pleasurable way."
"And how is that not abuse?"
"I am in control of any scenario she creates. I can withdraw consent at any time and I know what the consequences are for any action. If I do something that gets me punished, it's knowing what she'll do and wanting her to do it. She doesn't beat me. It's about pleasure. And she may be the dom but I am in control of the play the whole time. She wants me to enjoy it and demands to know the second I'm not."
"Do you still do BDSM now that you are pregnant? Do you do costumes and stuff?"
"Yes. We, of course, make sure it's safe and Alex is an expert on motherhood and S&M separately so she knows what she's doing and what she should do. Just as with any physical activity, if you are used to doing it before pregnancy and it feels comfortable and it's safe and sane then its fine to continue. And yes. My wife fills out a corset-like nothing else. And when we first started playing she leash trained me, she still makes me wear a collar sometimes but that's just so nobody tries to take her girl. We haven't done too much dress up stuff but I'm sure when we need a little spice we will and it's something I want to explore now that we are married and have a closet just for sex stuff, our bedroom has three closets and our contractor is on Alex's payroll so he didn't say a word when we made that design request. Plus we have a nice dungeon with a toddler-proof lock."
"Damn. You are a kinky little thing. It's probably good that we never got together. I wouldn't have been able to satisfy you and there would be no chance we could be best friends. I'm kinda glad we never had sex. You are hot but we would have been so incompatible in the bedroom. I'm just a garden-variety vanilla lesbian."
"I'm glad too. I like you more as my friend. And I'm glad I waited for the one. If I had known how amazing sex would feel with her, I would have completely waited for her and never let anyone touch my uncovered pussy with anything and definitely never let anyone else inside me. I wish she had gotten my virginity. That I had saved myself for marriage."
"It's probably a good thing you didn't. Because I've seen that woman with Geo and how raising him brings you together in a way that it might not otherwise. And fucking a woman like that takes some practice and deserving that queen demands kissing a few frog princes along the way. I was at a bar with some friends, a few of them from Smith, just before we went up to Manhattan for your wedding and they all thought it was sweet how I was taking my wife to NYC for Valentine's Day. I told them I was going there for a lesbian wedding. They asked who's and I answered Chapman. They couldn't believe it, not that you are in love with a woman but that you admitted it and your parents let you marry one. Then one of them asked who is she marrying? And I said Alex Vause and the whole fucking bar gasped. Long story short, I am a legend at that bar and no longer have to pay for beer on tap there."
"Yeah, that sounds like my life. Alex waves at a bouncer and we're in with no cover. She never waits in lines and always gets first class and the best table. I haven't bought a drink in like eighteen months. They find out who my girl is and people scurry. I like the power but Alex makes sure I keep some humility and stay in check. She doesn't want her reputation tarnished."
"She has a ring on her finger and knocked up her chick, her reputation is toast. She's just another domesticated once solely career-focused lesbian trading beer bottles for bottles of her lover's breast milk."
"Only the part she never asked for in the first place. She likes being a domestic, power dyke and she can cook. Man, that woman is as amazing in the kitchen as she is the bedroom."
"Yeah, I can tell. It looks like she's pretty good at more than adequately filling your belly."
"She is. Anything else you are curious about?"
"Who's her dad? Do you know?"
"Uhm, I have her babies in my belly. I know everything there is to know about their genes. So yes, I know. I'm the only person other than her mom who does know. But that name isn't for me to give. If she chooses to tell you or anyone else for that matter, she will. He's never done anything for her except provide a sperm, he's insignificant and doesn't deserve the power."
"Is it true that he's a famous rock star though? Without telling me who he is or what band he might be part of."
"At the time Alex was conceived he was. Now he's a casino has been. He's a drummer so not even really a face of the band."
"When was that?"
"1979. Her birthday is in eighteen, no nineteen days."
"Piper!"
"The age difference is insignificant when we get down to the connection between us and our ability to respond to each other's needs. Alex is young for her age and I'm old for mine. Even if I hadn't had a kid young, I still would have been an old soul," I asserted confidently but the way Jess' eyes softened as I explained my feelings on the subject told me I didn't have to, that she accepted it. Of course, she had seen us in the most loving moment any couple can share, the one when we were wed.
"True. I'm glad you're happy. I love seeing this side of you. Pregnant and in love and completely unafraid to be every bit of your true self that evidently is kinkier than I ever expected. Should we get some sleep," she asked as she looked at the ornamental clock above the mantle.
"Yeah and I want to say good night to Alex," I added
"I'll bet you do. Just if you cum on my sheets throw them in the washer," she told me in a sarcastic tone as she got off the couch and began clearing cups and dishes from the coffee table.
"I'm not going to-"
"Sure, Piper. You act like I don't know what a loving wife does when she has a bed to herself. And if I weren't married and she wasn't my best friend's wife I know I would," she teased.
"True. Night, Jess," I told her after she showed me where everything was and she pulled me into a warm embrace outside the guest bedroom.
"Night, Piper," she replied as she let me go and closed the door then walked down the hall to her own room. Once curled up in bed I video chatted with Alex. I showed Alex my belly and she cooed at her daughters and gave them kisses while they kicked and flipped wildly. This was definitely a moment to add to a letter to nineteen-year-old Piper, not that she would have believed a word of anything that had happened this day.
