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#164
Mackus said:
I wonder what was Tywin's reaction to *Stannis so expertly criticizing his "necessary act".
Tywin
Riverun, Riverlands
283 3 months after Wildfyre plot exposure
He spared a look at his brother Tyget as they enjoyed some of the fine wines Prince Stannis had requested be prepared for the occasion. The 'reactive' poison testing cloths and animals were effective and he felt safe on that front, even though he retained his poison testers. Some might take it as the man extending an olive branch but Twin knew better. This wedding was important to far too many to allow personal feelings to get involved, thus the man was being 'pleasant'. This was obvious when one considered the services of their handlers were until the termination of hostilities. It yet another stealth insult implying he believed Tywin would need a great deal of personal protection.
He saw Ser Gregor in position to his far right, with none but his personal guard near him. Tywin made especially sure to remind him to be on his best behavior lest he wind up like Ser Amory Lorch, who was currently a sub Castellan in Casterly Rock. In truth he was a prisoner who would be traded to the Dornish at war's end. Unlike the porcine glutton knight of manticores there was still a use for Gregor, though he wondered if the brute was intelligent enough to see his end pon the morrow.
"This is pretty good Arbor Gold. The bottle says 187 but I am no expert." Tyget and Gerion were always the ones for making merry. It was part of the reason Joy Hill even existed. Tywin made certain Gerion understood the use of the new 'condoms' and that further shaming of the family would not be tolerated should he wish to continue receiving his stipend. Though with how generous Robert and Stannis were he was uncertain that threat would be sufficient.
"I would hope the Tyrells know better than to short Prince Stannis. After all it is damn unlikely they could get away with it for long. Not to mention doing so won't help Lord not so fat Flower get his great grand daughter on the throne." Twyin countered and used a tone of speech that indicated he wanted silence.
Below them on the stage were numerous singers and players who performed. Some of them were making traditional songs, while others had some of Stannis' developments. Tywin was never fond of the King or his brother. The first was a drunken lout and the second far too sanctimonious and that was before his near death experience. Were it up to him that fool knight would have done the job properly.
He watched his daughter wave a page over and whisper in his ear. Three minutes later Twyin listened to another foreign singer warble 'The rains of Castermere' in an attempt to appease his daughter's request and he rolled his eyes. The fool would have been better off ignoring Cersei's unwise attempt and supporting her father's house. All she was doing was inciting the resentment many of these people had with house Lannister and Tywin in particular. In their minds he was responsible for 'Rhealla's rage' falling upon their shores and lands. They were too polite to say anything about it but the hard looks should have been enough to warn her off it.
This of course led to yet another one of Stannis songs being played, this time requested by Lord Jonos Bracken. And without coincidence it was one that could be construed as a response. The slow mournful sounds coming from the mouth of what he astutely construed was an Andal who spent time in Essos were indeed mesmerizing. His green eyes didn't match the purple hair or his outlandish clothes but his voice was enthralling.
When I heard that sound
When the walls came down
I was thinking about you
About you
When my skin grows old
When my breath runs cold
I'll be thinking about you
About you
The lion of the Rock stopped himself from snarling, because letting others know they could get under you skin was just another way to encourage more of the same behavior. Each time he attempted to explain the necessity, regrettable as it was of dealing with the Targaryens he had been shut down.
That accursed 'heroes' dinner was the worst of it. The up-jumped peasant actually pulled out a note when Tywin brought up a reasonable argument defending himself.
Back then
"Begging my lords' pardon but I don't want to misquote the prince." He handed the note to Lord Arryn and the king confirmed it was his brother's hand writing. The hand smirked without humor and the King barely contained his laughter. Then they passed it back to the damned smuggler who handed it to Maester Cressen.
It laid out Stannis' sly rebuke, and it was a rebuke for its delicacy. He actually rebuked the man who got his hands dirty for his brother. As if King Robert didn't smile with glee at the sight of his enemy's wife and children. The hypocrisy almost made him gag and the worst part was the end.
"And I understand the necessity of making hard choices in war. This is a land of harsh extremes and it breeds hard men. However I hope you will take time to consider the long term political and strategic ramifications of your actions in your much valued service.
I also realize you are quite experienced in solving difficult problems. Though should you find yourself making a hard choice for more than four hours I recommend you seek the attention of one the maesters allotted to your new academy." The laughter and snickers he received were increasingly unbearable. He had not been called a cock in quite some time.
Now
Tywin was not an idiot and he realized the strategic logic of the prince's argument, but he was just as much an ass as his brother. There was no need to be mocking, unless he was increasing his distance to Tywin even after marrying his daughter to Lord Edmure, claiming Tyrion as a page and actually legitimizing Gerion's natural child to make her a cup bearer to Queen to be Lyanna. The fact he allowed Tywin to have so much and hinted at releasing Jaime from the Kingsgaurd could be construed as a reward, but a part of him worried. Perhaps they were shoring up the West support for removing a troublesome and out dated Lord. He looked at Ser Gregor and a part of him was uncertain.
We bleed ourselves in vain
How tragic is this game?
Turn around, I'm holding on to someone
But the love is gone
Carrying the load, with wings that feel like stone
Knowing that we nearly fell so far now
It's hard to tell
He looked at his daughter and she like a good deal of the vapid, empty headed cows were becoming misty eyed. That Essosi singer would likely become the father of many a bastard if he did not have any of those 'skins'. It was almost love, that hook was a stealth insult to him and the triumph he had over the scheming Reyne bitch. Symbolically, the song could be the last lament of people trapped in a collapsing building; or drowning under water. And the singer was really earning his position with delivery. Tywin was good at reading men and the single tear that fell down his cheek felt genuine. So did the look of barely concealed hatred that burned into him as their green eyes locked, before he wisely repressed it back within his mask.
Tywin considered making an example of him, but though better of it. Many small folk had lost people in the Saltpan's landing and subsequent offensive. And contrary to what Stannis might believe Lord Tywin could learn from his 'mistakes', unlike the Iron born scum Prince Stannis brought into the war on their side. His victory in Massy Hook and economic incentives had convinced Balon Greyjoy to retake an active support in the form of 'Varangians'. Below there were 'elite' raiders including Drums, Skinners and Good Brothers. Lord Drum was showing Red Rain off to some mummer wenches and making some kind of sword joke. What passed for Iron born humor was truly sad. Though Tywin was able to give the man his due, keeping Balon and Doran on board was a stroke of genius which contributed to the war in an of itself.
At least his other present contribution was more appreciated. The crannog men while strange and somewhat uncouth were not as barbaric as the Freys made them out to be. They made excellent scouts. And he unlike Edmure did not need Stannis or Lord Peat's warnings to beware of Walder Frey. His forces were being closely monitored both by the crannog men and his sister. If he attempted anything untoward many more Freys than Lord Walder would be permanently late, 'suggestions' or no.
"Joanna would be proud" He turned to his brother and swallowed the rebuke that was on his tongue. Tyg was right and he had enough people who hated him in the hall as it was.
"Yes, she certainly would." A part of him knew she always hated this part of weddings. It was so undignified. At least Edmure seemed smitten enough. With any luck she would be as
Tywin looked on with a mix of pride and slight revulsion as they began the 'bedding' of his only daughter. Men and women both stared with envy and desire as Joanna's child was carried off to join houses Lannister and Tully forever. He would learn to swallow a good deal of humble pie and fork out whatever weregild the damn snakes wanted. Just how Stannis knew the Lannister mines were played out and a method to 'help' was beyond him.
There were knights, men at arms and servants making that ridiculous stabbing motion. A few of the more drunken were unfolding their arms in a wave motion. From what he knew of the proposed technique it was in reference to a 'blast' of wildfire. Tyg interrupted him again.
"Now let's see brother. Stannis just invited us into the STAB alliance or is it now the BLAST alliance." He laughed and despite his earlier foul mood a small smile almost, almost broke across his cheek. Then he remembered the rest of the heroes dinner and he further humiliation he felt.
Stannis' invitation came with 'suggested' practices. The king made it clear he would not tolerate 'excessive' collective punishments against clearly innocent small folk who had no choice or options. That meant no ordering whole villages put to the sword, or organized rapes. Looting was still fine, as long it was 'orderly' and they left at least enough for the people to survive to the next three towns. It seemed appealing to Robert's wanting to be approved by Lyanna Stark was a button his brother knew how to press well. And while that last part was aimed at him specifically he felt Stannis' glare through his brother's voice.
Tywin ignored the rest of the wedding feast, especially the foolishness at the Iron born's section. At least they understood that Stannis was quite serious about following discipline, which was fitting for the amount the crown was paying them. That and Stannis had personally executed a half dozen of his Verangians for acting like Iron born. What was funny was the other Iron born weren't overly upset about and even seemed to respect him somewhat as he had drowned them.
Tywin was woken in by a row in the early morning. Lord Hoster was asleep and his son was busy making him a grandfather. He opted to handle the issue before it could disturb either of them, and these Iron born were his responsibility.
"What is the matter?" His brother had crawled out from under the serving woman he was with and was in a fouler mood than him.
"Some foolishness with the Ironborn." Lord Drumm and his two sons approached the table the Lannisters had set up their 'court' at. Opposite them were some Westerland hedge knights, one of which had a busted nose.
hat is the issue here?" He fixed each of them with a hard look from his lord's face. It was too early to deal with this kind of stupidity and he was of half a mind to give out sharp lessons to everyone involved. In fact he was going to make at least one example.
"What's the matter is this cunt tried to take my fuuking sword! He's lucky all I busted was his nose." Sobering up enough Tywin recognized the blade they were talking about. He had tried to purchase Red Rain a few times and failed. It wouldn't be the first time some hedge knight became a robber knight. Usually it ended with a killing, and Tywin was impressed the man had shown any restraint at all.
As they went one he found out that the sword was reported missing by Dennis and some serving man told him she saw Ser Logan Deerfield creeping back to his tent.
"Its not true milord. This fucker is just a clumsy drunk blamin others for hi' own stupidity! I weren't no where near that damn thing. And even I was going to take it why would I be stupid enough to leave it in my tent where the next man can see. Not like there's a whole bunch of privacy in me section." Which was a good point. It might be that the thieves realized they couldn't escape and planted it with the closest patsy. Then again it could just be a stupid hedge knight though he could get one over on drunk Ironborn. They were getting heated and Tywin wanted to go back to bed, but something told him to look a bit closer.
"Bring me the sword." When they did Tywin pulled it out and saw the telltale ripple associated with Valyrian steel. Or at least that's what he should have seen. He silenced the restart of the bickering.
"Silence! The next one to speak will receive 14 lashes. Bring me a bright lantern." It was deadly quiet as he examined the very clever forgery. If it were broad daylight the hoax might have been caught by the father or his sons. However a couple of drunks trying to impress some pretty wenches made for easy marks. The hedge knight was just a cover for the culprits to escape.
"You three are idiots! You don't use a Valyerian steel sword to impress harlots. And you were obviously stealing something otherwise you wouldn't have been where you were at that time. Tell me what it was now and I will be lenient. If I have to search your belongings you will get an extra seven lashes for each item." The man tried to keep a hard face for a minute but quickly broke. As Tywin expected he had stolen some bits of armor, tack for his horse and a small dagger. The 'ser' got himself 10 lashes and was on latrine duty until further notice. To make his point on the sword being fake he drove into the stone wall. Valyrian steel blades would chip stone, this one dented.
"Fuck! It was that hore, wannit? Denny's what I tell you bout them red heads?" The older Drumm was not in a good mood and made to chastise his son. Neither was Tywin when he thought about how much embarrassment this would bring to his daughters wedding. His brother saw his mood and gained silence by striking his dagger pommel on the table.
"This did not happen tonight." Tywin said it softly, but it was enough for everyone in the room to realize just how angry he actually was. Drumm looked to question but thought better of it.
"Lord Drumm you will wait two days before you report your blade stolen. By now it is in rebel hands." His brother looked at him and he nodded.
"You think Jonothor Darry took it" It wasn't a question.
"He will seek to embarrass us at every turn. I want you to implement the highest security protocol." The improved security was likely the reason they lured the Drumms away from the feast hall for the switch and didn't try to frame a more important knight or lord. Tywin was both relieved and angry. Part of him was happy for more proof that Stannis was not infallible. While another was afraid to think of what could have happened if they wanted to do more than just steal.
