A/N: Hope everyone is doing well with all that is going on right now...I know things are worse in other places than where I am, my state is under a shelter in place that too many people aren't taking seriously...luckily we have fanfiction and books to bring us joy and escape in this time and I am working to do my part, as small as it may be. I hope you all enjoy the Vauseman/Nichorello action in this chapter...still figuring out the next chapter I want Cal in there, a moving update/home tour and a babymoon in the mountains I might try to fold it all into one or do a double update...after that will be the baby showers if you guys have any ideas/requests for a Vauseman twins baby shower. Glad to see people are loving the way I'm writing Diane and Piper...one of my goals with this story was to imagine a relationship between them and show the parallel between them (I still think we were robbed of a Piper/Diane scene in OITNB...except for one tiny mention from Alex when Tricia died you didn't hear about the two of them but that scene makes it clear they knew each other well and I loved the actress who played Diane)

"So remind me again why I'm here," Nicky asked as we walked into our third Upper East Side baby boutique. Lorna and I walked over to a section of newly arrived girl's clothes while I watched Alex go over to the mommy section with its lotions, books, and clothing for nursing moms while Nicky followed begrudgingly.

"You wanted to give me a shower," Alex reminded her friend with a hard shove to her shoulder.

"Well, I didn't want to, I just didn't want my girlfriend to call me a monster. And Jamila made us take a vote at work, I couldn't not vote for it, I'm your business partner and best friend. And I figured it might convince Lorna that kids are only fun when you can give them back. Aunties have it way better than mommies and it's expensive. Besides who wants to have to buy this shit," she asked as she looked at all the tops with easy access for new moms to feed their babies with a shocked expression.

"You can't put a price tag on watching your wife grow your children," Alex responded nonchalantly while she ran her fingers along small tubs of creams and I had to admit it was getting me turned on. It wasn't completely unusual for her mere existence on the same planet as me to give me an orgasm but lately the pull she had over me, that I had to her, was stronger than ever. I exhausted her more times than she would have liked to admit lately but I had an unquenchable need to be fucked senseless lately and a wife I knew always aimed to please the ladies and now that lady was singular only worked harder to please her woman and keep the little ladies she was growing. I tried to hide how wet everything about the way she was merely existing, every tiny imperfection only making her more attractive, and I thought I was doing a pretty good job but Lorna had to repeat her ooing and awing multiple times before I suggested we look at the shoes. Shoes, because I knew that was the only thing I found more attention-grabbing than my wife. But try as I might, I couldn't stop myself from eavesdropping on her conversation on the other end of the store.

"Oh I can and it's too high for both my brain and bank account. I don't know how you two run multiple companies, raise a preschooler, have a healthy and more importantly hot marriage as it is. Have you even changed a diaper," Nicky challenged as she flipped through one of the books and made a sour face when she flipped to a page, which judging from her sour expression had a picture she obviously wasn't ready to see.

"I work with new mothers, of course, I have. And Geo was still in diapers at night when I fell in love with Piper, but don't talk about it. He's embarrassed no matter how many times I tried in every way imaginable as both a psychiatrist and a mother. At first, Piper was even embarrassed to tell me, she thought it meant she was a failure as a mother, I don't think I'll ever convince her she's an amazing mother," Alex replied as she took the book from Nicky then went back to browsing nursing supplies.

"Doesn't mean you're gonna stop trying," Nicky replied as she accepted that Alex expected her to be by her side. She rubbed Alex's shoulders reassuringly, more like a sister than a lover, which made me wonder if she knew I was spying on her. Who was I trying to kid, she always knew when I was trying to get the real story by listening in on Alex and Nicky's playful banter and friendly chats.

"Never. I chose her because I saw how she lit up when Geo entered the room. Before I always thought if I dated a woman with a kid I'd feel jealous but I never felt the slightest tingle of jealousy," Alex saw Nicky glare at her, a silent signal between the two best friends to 'stop bullshitting' the other, "Have you seen my wife? Of course, I get jealous for a million other reasons. She could have any boy or girl she wanted and she chose me. It's mind-boggling."

"I get it, Vause," Nicky responded confidently, "What I don't get is why you need all this shit? What's the difference between one cream and another," Nicky asked as her eyes scanned the five different types of cream on the shelf.

"Babies need a lot of things and I spent years working my ass off so when I was ready I could give my daughter the world," Alex answered as she scanned the store for me and I poked my head out of her blind spot and smiled from across the store with a red leather pair of baby shoes in my hands.

"Yes babies need couture and expensive European shit cause they really care how soft the fabric is when they shit and puke on it," Nicky cackled as she looked over at the mostly pastel-colored baby clothes on me and Lorna's side of the store.

"I. Can. Afford. It. I can also afford to replace anything I need to for any reason. I'm not saying my kids are too good for Graco and Gerber-"

"Sure, Vause. Just promise me you are at least going to raise your kids and not give them too much too soon. My mother fucked up royally and I don't want to see the things that happened to me and my other Manhattan trust fund baby friends. And we both know Piper isn't exactly a shining counterexample or you and I would be shooting bourbon and checking out chicks in between talking just enough work to write it off later," Nicky said in that pained tone she got on the rare occasion that she seriously discussed anything, especially her shitty childhood and fucked up adolescence before of course turning the theatrics to high gear with memories of the legendary high jinks of Alex Vause and Nicky Nichols around New York and Cape Cod.

Alex chuckled, "Those were some good times. But my life is trying to figure out how I became the mother who dresses her son like he's going to his Wall Street job and bathed her daughters in pink despite her wife's complaints."

"How many pink and floral prints does a kid need?"

"Don't forget cheetah print."

"Vause, you are one trashy bitch sometimes," Nicky teased as they both laughed louder than they should in such a classy store.

"I can't take you anywhere, Nicks," Alex replied with a shove once their laughter died down.

"Does that mean I can go home and watch TV with my dog and get caught up on my charting," Nicky pleaded sarcastically and also as a way to let Alex know exactly how much she would rather do anything else than spend her Saturday doing this. Because if there's one thing everybody at Artemis knew it was that Dr. Nichols hated doing her charts. Which ended up serving me well because nobody batted an eye when mine never even existed. If Nicky had been better at keeping charts updated, much less making one then there would have been immediate suspicion when even a rejected patient never had a chart at the clinic. Her free-spirited, anti-establishment way of providing therapy had bought Alex and me time before we were ready to go public about our relationship. And I sure was grateful for her character defects.

"Nope. It means you will behave," she commanded as Nicky picked up a breast pump and held it to her chest.

"I could not imagine using one of these," Nicky declared a little too boisterously. Alex looked at me and then shrugged, hoping Nicky didn't notice and ask questions she wasn't ready to answer and I had convinced her she didn't have to.

"Put that down and stop it before you get us kicked out of this store. I know it's your MO and all and it's mine to prevent it but our better halves don't need to know that," Alex commanded as she grabbed the hand pump out of Nicky's hand and placed it back on the shelf like she was a toddler who had grabbed a dangerous item off the shelf.

"Look at those two going all crazy over hair bows and patent leather shoes they'll maybe wear once for all of a minute. If that since they are your girls," Nicky declared as she changed the subject.

"What exactly are you implying?"

"Oh, you know very well, Vause. But I thought you didn't want to get us thrown out of here," Nicky replied asking Alex grabbed two jars of our favorite nipple cream.

"How does one woman need as much of that stuff as Piper seems to?"

"Cause Piper isn't the only one using it," Alex stated with every bit of her trademark cool demeanor as if she was completely unfazed by who she was, what she said and you should be too.

"Every time I think you two can't sink to another level of weird, you guys find a way," Nicky said as she shook her head in disgust. I decided to walk over there, mostly because I wanted to punch Nicky in the mouth but also because I missed those hands touching me with every fiber of my being and it had only been maybe ten minutes since we last touched yet already felt like ten million years. But Nicky was smart enough to go searching for where Lorna had run off to in the store.

"Speaking of my beautiful wife," Alex cooed as she pulled me in as close as she could with my bump in between us and kissed me with sweet passion, "you see anything you like," Alex asked as I peered down at her chest and she walked me over behind a display without losing her grip on my back then squeezing my ass before giving it three small, silent slaps. I bit my lip as she glared at me coolly and shook her head as I grabbed a handful of her ass and dared her with my eyes to do anything about it. What could she do? She mouthed the word later but right now I could postpone later until at least August if I really wanted to. Or if these girls came out with the right eye/hair color combo then quite likely forever. "So other than another perfectly innocent mother shopping for baby stuff, see anything you want to take home?"

"Too much," I replied with soft doe eyes that I knew was the greatest weapon in my arsenal to getting anything I wanted, whenever I wanted it.

"Never babe. I don't want to," she paused to kiss me while my eyes searched for Nicky and Lorna, "hey, eyes over here woman. One second all you can see are my tits in your overactive imagination and the next you are wandering and trying to make sure there isn't anything more enticing to look at," Alex commanded as she grabbed my chin hard in her hand and squeezed my cheeks with her thumb and pinkie, I knew she would probably leave a mark but I didn't let that influence my behavior. I knew I had her where I wanted so I decided to play with her a little before I let her consume me. Of course, by then she would be convinced it had all been her idea.

"I was just making sure those two aren't making trouble," I said innocently.

"Yeah, they don't belong in a store like this. You think Lorna will ever figure it out," Alex asked in a tone that made it clear to me that if she was on to my game then she wasn't about to give me a clue.

"I don't know. I always knew she was a lot like me. She did what she was expected to do and never let herself color too far outside of the lines. Then she watched me fall for a woman and she followed me when I left Popi and she met Nicky then caught feelings. You know they haven't been past second base."

"Oh, I know. Nicky would like to convince me otherwise but I wouldn't be the expert in my field that I am if I actually fucking believed her."

"You think those two will ever get this," I ran my finger over the button on her pants before running my fingers along her waistband and finding her belt loop as I used what little bit of grace I had left to loop my leg between hers. Maybe I should call my mom and let her know she had once again won, those six months of ballet when I was three that she insisted on when she figured out everybody else's daughter had been doing dance for over a year finally came in handy."

"Sure, Pipes, if you want to explain exactly how. And then listen to your mother tell you all the reasons a woman in your condition shouldn't be having sex or even thinking about it. That all your attention should be to your rapidly expanding midsection," she paused and ran her hands along my back to my sides and caressed my belly, "and preparing your body for their imminent arrival," she added while she bent her head down and quickly kissed my chest.

"Keep it up, Vause and explaining our present sex life to Carol Chapman will be the least of our worries."

"Somebody horny?"

"Yeah, as if you giving me permission to do whatever, whenever with your body wasn't enough now I have these hormones surging through me. I don't know if it's because they're girls or I'm actually in love with the person I'm making them with but damn I just have this insatiable need for it all the time. I was never very, you know, but lately I can't keep my hands off you," I whispered seductively as I sporadically let my lips barely graze her ear and fingers gently touch her neck, periodically scratching lightly.

"I can't keep mine off you. Let's finish our excursion, get our registry finalized so our friends can buy stuff for the baby showers they swear they aren't throwing," Alex told me as she put her glasses in the purse on her shoulder and verbally tried to maintain her composure and control while her body language was saying something completely different. But of course, that was the point. The Alex Vause that took my name and wore my ring was subtle in the art of wooing a woman and private about her sexual advances.

"There's no surprising you is there," I teased as I pressed my lips to hers just until she tried to kiss me back then pulled away, a move I would never do at home but I knew she could do nothing about in public. I was challenging her and judging from the way she shook her head she knew it and it was getting her turned on.

"I don't know, falling for you like I did was pretty damn surprising," Alex ran her fingers through my hair and kissed me until I returned her kiss and moaned into her mouth, "easy, tiger. I don't want to add breastfeeding section of a ritzy baby boutique to the list of interesting places I've fucked a hot chick."

"You never fuck me anywhere exciting," I argued as I tried to get that last remaining hesitant part of her to give in to my advances.

"Oh, really, I don't? Should I name a few? Cause I love it when I bring out your proper blonde lady side. I greatly enjoy making your face all flushed and don't really care how it happens. Although you aren't a very proper blonde WASP with your brown roots showing and making out with a dyke in a store that caters to the breeder crowd but is smart enough to give me a chance to prove I'm the wealthiest person in this store and my money isn't contingent on my marital status. Neither is yours. You belong in a store like this, even more than I do. If we get kicked out of anywhere I want it to be 'cause I got caught doing sloppy work," she thrust her finger into my leggings and past my underwear and massaged my clit as I did everything I could to not come on the spot, especially when she upped the ante and nibbled my earlobe, "you like that, you naughty little girl? Is that what you've been trying to make me do for the last fifteen minutes. Being bad makes you so wet in all the right places. And you are so bad. Always willing to spread your legs for a hot set of tits. Guess I need to put my woman in her place cause evidently putting a baby in her belly wasn't enough to make her a good little submissive wife," Alex teased as I slapped her as hard enough to make my point but not enough that anyone else would hear and grabbed her lower lip in my teeth.

"You complaining," I teased as I let my fingers barely grace the curve of her breast and she parted my lips with one finger while her thumb pressed hard on my clit, "I guess that's your way of saying, no."

"No, my love, it's my way of saying you already fucking know and you are a ridiculous human for asking the question or ever thinking I'd complain about your all-consuming craving for my sweet golden pussy and perfect tits."

"I don't know if I'd call them perfect," I teased as she pushed one finger inside me roughly without warning and it took everything I had not to scream at the top of my overly constricted lungs. For a moment I couldn't breathe but I was in Alex's arms so I knew I was safe. I gave her an open mouth kiss and let it fill my lungs and move through my body. Once I regained my composure I asserted, "when will you ever learn, sticking anything inside my vagina will never get me to change my undesirable behavior?"

"Yes, but reminding you I'm the only one who can fuck you like your kinky well-bred high-society self likes will. And you're welcome to go do some research but it'll be kind of hard in your current condition," she teased as she slid another finger down and pushed it inside me.

"What I'm still hot," I teased as I unbuttoned her pants and cupped her sex as best I could through her boxer briefs, "By the way, Vause, for the foreseeable future it's thongs only for you," I commanded as I cupped her harder, digging my nails into her mound until she mouthed 'yes, babe' with a look that peered into the depths of my soul and made my body shudder as I broke out into a cool sweat.

"You are but nobody will fully appreciate it like I will. And nobody else could deal with the unholy preggo gas. And the toddler who just arrived at the lovely stage of boyhood where farts are the funniest thing imaginable," Alex said, almost as if she were challenging me to make her unable to talk by making mommy small talk and since I could already feel the beginnings of a wet spot on her underwear, I gave in and moved my hand back up to the black band on her hips and thrust three fingers inside her underwear, feeling the softness and sweat of her aroused skin and watching her expression as I entered her.

"Well look at the two lovebirds giving us all a show of how lesbians make a baby," Nicky bellowed out of nowhere. Where had she come from? Had I really let myself get that distracted? Normally I was more vigilant in public, especially when I initiated the encounter.

"I'm not a lesbian, Nicky," I replied as I quickly pulled my fingers out of my wife's pants and I heard her make a noise that sounded like a deflated balloon.

"Now, say that again without looking at my best friend's tits and without her cum glistening on your fingers," Nicky taunted.

"What they're nice, I mean for a set of tits," I replied as I licked my fingers, not caring that I was making her point by doing this very action. My wife was tasty, delectable even, that wasn't my fault either, "If you're into that sort of thing. Which, of course, if I were I wouldn't be in my present condition. Cause you don't make babies by playing with titties and eating pussy. And I strongly prefer women, that doesn't make me a lesbian."

"Uh-huh, babe. Is that really the battlefield you wanna die on," Alex teased as she and Nicky rolled their eyes at each other. They didn't even need to remind me of the so-called definition of a lesbian and how well I fit it. Or that I seemed to only argue about using the l-word to describe myself when I was called it by the queer women who knew me best. I knew who I loved, the person I love knew and I had no qualms about revealing the gender of my beloved Alex if somebody asked the right question. I felt Alex palm my breast through my shirt and I glared at her before she asked in a tone she saved for when she was truly pissed yet also losing control, "Need I remind you who got you knocked up and how? Cause last I checked, that's a piece of me in your belly. And I don't think we need to discuss the things you do to my hot rack. You just can't get enough of them. Shall I remind you how many times you've said how perfect they are in their natural state and how many mornings you've woken up and told me you can't believe you get to touch them whenever you want through that adorable half-conscious state of yours when you are just waking up and trying to speak through your cotton mouth."

"You and attaching your entire self worth to others' opinions on your tits. Oh, the things I could tell the APA and NYU about why you should lose your status within the medical community," I teased as I ignored her attempt at romance.

"Not others per se, well not anymore. Just yours," Alex fired back with that air of vulnerability that only she could mix with badass confidence.

"Hey focus, you two. Fight it out later cause I don't remember buying a front row seat to the latest in ridiculous X-Rated arguments between the Vauses. Can't those little bastards like hear and shit now? Poor squirts are gonna come out saying tit and cock with you as their mothers."

"Oh their first word will be mama," Alex bellowed as she ran her hand along my bump and pushed her fingertips under my shirt as if she was trying to get as close to her daughters as possible given her current limitations.

"Not if they keep hearing you two talking about your cock and seeing you wear men's clothes, then it'll be dada," Nicky fired back at Alex with a chuckle.

"I'll take it," Alex answered with a slight shrug and pursed lips, making it clear that only one woman could ever have the privilege of saying they could outplay Alex Vause, much less live to tell the tale.

"Such a narcissistic slut," Nicky replied as she grabbed Lorna's arm and kept her from straying to the books that had recently traumatized her.

"Aw, that's the sweetest thing you've ever said to me."

"Really, in all the seven years we've known each other?"

"Just about," she responded as she let me go with one last rub to my back before grabbing me and pulling me into her side before I could stray very far from her body, "You two enjoying yourselves. Haven't heard much from you today, Lorna."

"I'm just a little overwhelmed by everything and the price tags on some of this stuff. My siblings and I barely make as much in a year as some of the stuff in this store costs. It's just another thing convincing me don't think I want my own. I love my nieces and nephews and of course Geo but I see what mothers go through and even if all they need is diapers, a few outfits and a couple bottles I still don't think I could do it 24/7 and I see what my sisters and Piper have gone through during pregnancy and no thanks. Kids get into everything. I like being able to leave my makeup out and not having it turn into a toddler's art project. Kids are destructive. Besides all my sisters and aunties have gotten super depressed after they had their babies and did some weird shit. What's that thing you told me about again, Alex?"

"Postpartum Psychosis, a more extreme version of Postpartum Depression. I've seen a lot of it and been an expert witness at some horrific trials cause of it. Right now, I'm not permitted to see the most severe patients, as is the policy for expectant mothers in my department. We can't see them for the two months before and three months after pregnancy and it was my idea to treat non-biological queer mothers like any other pregnant mom. Yeah, I'm starting to regret pushing through that policy. But I also know that my mind is no different from that of a pregnant woman and my body is starting to feel it too. Sympathetic pregnancy is a real thing and it sucks," she told Lorna as she leaned her head on my shoulder and I smelled her hair before kissing her wisp of baby hair by her ear.

"What you finally decide you enjoy seeing patients," Nicky interrupted.

"I enjoy some of them, the exciting ones anyway. But I'm talking to your girlfriend. Hush and maybe I'll let you choose where we go for lunch."

"Yes, Boss."

"So Lorna. Continue. I'm sorry I didn't get this one fully housetrained before I introduced you two and encouraged this idiot to pursue the pretty, young babysitter."

"I'm beginning to realize that the Morello genes and name are safe for another generation no matter what I do or don't do. If I were in your situation where I was the only child and there was nobody else to carry my family name as far as I knew then I might think differently but I'm happy with Rootbeer and being an auntie. If things keep going the way they have been with Nicky I might consider getting her a little puppy brother but I don't feel the need to have a tiny human and it's not like we can make one by accident."

Alex looked around and noticed Nicky was again distracted by nursing stuff as if she had just arrived from an alien planet completely devoid of lactating mothers, "Or not by accident. You know if you are struggling to adjust to being with a woman or nervous about the logical next step you can talk to me."

"Would it be legal?"

"I can't give you official medical advice, give you a diagnosis or prescribe you anything unless it was a life-threatening medical emergency but we can always talk. If I can help you with anything I will. You are important to the two women I love most so you are important to me, kid."

"But aren't you busy with the move in two weeks and the girls coming in a few months?"

"You are on the short-list of people I could never be too busy for. Nicky, you, Diane, Cal and I think that's about it," Alex rattled off the list of the names of the few people she actually loved as she smiled with a mischievous wink at me before pressing her warm, wet red lips to my cheek just long enough to leave a light mark.

"Hey," I cried out as I returned her expression and gave her a kiss that left sticky glittery pink lip gloss on her cheek.

"Of course, you Pipes. Always and above everyone and everything else. I'm a steaming pile of dog shit without you," she reached her arm around my back and rubbed my belly until I felt Baby B stir at her Momma's touch on her foot while she kissed the spot behind my ear and I gushed like a schoolgirl with her first crush while Lorna sighed at the display of sweet romance before we returned to our task now that everything was once again settled for the four of us. We were all falling into our places, both as couples and individuals and it was beautiful.