The Truth - Chapter 58: Revelations

Enough with the fun, it's time to get serious...

OooOoo

"Oh, come on!" Luke exclaimed with exasperation. "Not again!"

Although, truth be told, he'd expected a summons to CC. He wiped his hands on a rag, which was pointless since there was already grease all over his pants, and readied himself to confront—

No, not confront. It was time to reverse course. Plus, as he paused outside the door, it was only Narra and Boss. Unlike the generals, they would listen to him. He was prepared to defend his infiltration of the Officers Lounge and his request for bodies, but there was something even more important to him at this moment. And he didn't want his father to overhear.

Dad? Are you there? I need privacy.

Why?

Because I'm going to have to be abjectly servile for awhile.

One, two, three breaths…. By 'abjectly servile' do you mean 'polite'?

He rolled his eyes, certain that his father could feel the motion. Yes.

I might enjoy such a novel attitude from you.

Very funny. Just do it because I'm asking. Please? Promise you won't listen until I talk to you again.

Is this something I would not want my offspring doing?

It's fine. Just promise. Or else!

Skepticism rippled across their bond. Very well. But no drugs or alcohol.

No! I already promised that! He waited until he could feel that his father was retreating from the thin wall he'd built. Then he wondered if he'd just been given subtle permission to do anything except drugs or alcohol. Unfortunately, this wasn't the best time to give something new a try.

He straightened his jumpsuit as best he could. Maybe it was positive news and not another scolding about his sojourn into officers' territory. Stepping inside, he stood very straight and clasped his hands behind his back like a good little soldier and waited.

However….

"Before you start scolding me, I need some information," Luke said firmly. "About the fall of the Republic."

Narra sighed, which made Luke send him a reminding look. "Go ahead and ask. History 101."

"Thanks. Well, one of the guys— officers in the Lounge was from Alderaan and he told the guys from Naboo that their queen put Palpatine in power and he thought it was a conspiracy between them. Did you ever hear about that?"

"Hmm…. I remember that she was pivotal in removing Chancellor Valorum and putting Palpatine in his place." Narra sat back in the chair and folded his hands on the table. "There was talk of a conspiracy. I didn't give it much credit as conspiracy theories are easy to spread and difficult to prove or disprove. There was another theory that the blockade of Naboo was part of a conspiracy involving Palpatine and the Trade Commission to force the queen to defend the planet and ultimately to remove the chancellor."

Luke bit his lip. He supposed it was better that his mother was a pawn rather than a traitor to the Republic. "Do you remember which queen it was?" Because maybe Priyat had been wrong and it had been another ruler altogether.

"Amidala," Boss said, squashing his hopes. "Later she became a senator and continued to support Palpatine until he took supreme control of the government. Of course, the Jedi supported him too. No one knew his true intentions until it was too late to stop him. That was when the purge of the Jedi occurred."

"Huh." At least Boss was thoughtful enough not to blame his father directly. He interlaced his fingers and rested them in his lap, palms down to hide the tension in them. Seems like something the Jedi should have figured out earlier— a Sith right in front of their faces. "I didn't know that." Of course his father knew and had chosen not to tell him. After all of Vader's confessions, he had left out these important facts about his mother. "Why did she support him? How could no one suspect?"

"He'd been in the senate a long time. She must have trusted him." Narra frowned. "How different the galaxy would have been if someone had known his motives."

Like his father. When had Anakin Skywalker realized Palpatine's true identity?

"Someone who cared, you mean," Boss corrected. "Certainly there were people who knew and supported him. He couldn't have gained control without help. History lesson done now, Oz?"

For all their investigations into his background, they hadn't researched Padme Naberrie. She was just 'the mother', no one worth studying— unlike her Jedi husband. They'd tossed her name aside as unimportant… and he admitted to himself that he could have learned all this if he'd looked into her history instead of only caring about his father. But now what? If he told them her identity that might be another black mark against him. Yet if he didn't tell them, the truth would come out eventually… and probably it would come from him because he couldn't stop talking, just like Janson said. And it was so tiring to keep up with lie after lie.

But he couldn't tell. It wasn't their business. They didn't need to know every private moment of his life and history and definitely didn't need to speculate any more about his parents and what must have been a very complicated relationship between them and...Palpatine.

"Oz?"

"Luke, at least in here. Please." He stared at his hands, at the knuckles that had gone white, and deliberately unclenched them.

He felt betrayed. Why hadn't his father told him? Both his parents had supported Palpatine. Vader had told him nothing about Padme, not even the happy times— maybe, he realized suddenly, because she wasn't his. She was part of Anakin Skywalker's life so Darth Vader denied his memories of her.

Except that she had died giving birth to Luke. On the worst day of my father's life.

Yet… Luke was part of Anakin's life, and Vader wanted him.

"Oz!"

He became conscious of the silence in the room. "Sorry. I was thinking."

"Something I encourage you to do more often."

"I think a lot," Luke defended. "It's just that sometimes the words come out before I've finished thinking them."

Boss laughed a little and Narra couldn't hide the quirk of his lips.

"We're doing some thinking too." Narra looked at Boss, who gestured to Narra, who cleared his throat. "I've talked to High Command and we're rethinking your request to become a pilot."

Miraculously, Luke kept a serious face. "I'm already a pilot."

"A fighter pilot. You need training. One flight during battle doesn't mean you're skilled enough to take on missions."

Luke smiled slightly. Time to shake them up a little. "Well, I've flown TIEs," he said innocently. "That should count for something."

Commander Narra sighed, picked up his stylus and gnawed on the tip. "TIEs," he said slowly. "You've flown TIEs? Well, why not... Should we expect more surprises in the future?"

Luke grimaced. "Oh… well… I don't know. I've only flown a TIE once. Twice or… maybe. Just for fun, not for fighting. That was an example of words that came out when I didn't think long enough first."

"We noticed," Boss said. "I'm willing to consider your training in a few weeks. If, and only if, you faithfully continue your combat and fencing classes as well as your work schedule."

He was more than slightly offended. "You have a lot of criticisms of me, and maybe some of them are justified, but one thing I am not is a quitter!" His voice shook with passion he hadn't realized he felt. "It doesn't matter what happens or how bad things get or what I have to do— I don't quit!"

Unless walking away from Yoda counted. He should've stopped thinking before he thought that thought… but that would constitute quitting, so…. He sighed.

"I know that," Boss replied quietly. "I shouldn't have put it quite that way. I just want to be sure of your consistency before we commit to training you."

Frankly, that sounded like the same criticism but using different words. This one time he'd let them get away with it. And obviously they weren't going to ask him to sit down, so he dropped onto the chair next to Boss. "You know, it's not easy being me. You have no idea of the burdens I carry."

"Oz," Commander Narra began with a touch of weariness in his voice, "you need to conform to our rules. Stop deliberately causing conflicts and—"

"Oz doesn't conform," he snapped, irritated. "Why don't you try asking Luke about his burdens and his intentions and his problems?"

"All right. Why doesn't Luke tell us about his burdens?"

Before he could fire back a response, Boss shook his head. "You're sixteen. It will take another few decades to understand what burdens really are. And telling your teammates that you visited with Vader and that he, of all absurdities, furnished you with a new wardrobe— which, granted, I suspect was the truth— doesn't help anyone believe that your intentions are serious."

"Damned if I do, damned if I don't," Luke grumbled.

"Let's hear him out." Narra gestured with one hand.

Obviously he'd done the words-before-thought again, and he wasn't prepared to explain himself. But he might not have another chance, especially without his father listening in. And he really didn't want Vader to know about his uncertainties.

"I have so much inside me," he said, struggling to fumble through his feelings, "and there's no way to let it out. It just keeps building and building until I feel like I might explode. But there's nowhere to practice and I have to keep hiding and lying and I can't keep on thinking up reasonable stories to explain my whole damn existence and—"

"Are you talking about the Force?" Boss asked, and when Luke nodded, he added: "But now everyone knows you're a Sensitive, and Command and Red Squad know you've had Jedi training, so—"

"I'm not a Jedi!" He nearly shouted. "Yoda was horrible— the terrible things he made me see and do— I never want to be a Jedi! But that's not the point!"

"Explain to us," Narra said quietly. "Help us understand."

"When I was young— younger," he corrected in case they mocked his age, "I could naturally do things and know things that other people couldn't, but I wasn't allowed to, so I had to hide it and never use it." Purposely, he unfolded his fingers. The prosthetic ones had pressed red marks atop his real hand, and they faded gradually as he watched. "Once I started learning from my father, it was like I'd been sleeping and was finally waking up. And now, since Yoda… I know I could do so much more, but I still have to hide and I can't let it loose and I don't have time to practice, but I have to practice so I can build on what I know. Otherwise I'll… fail."

Narra sighed— again. "That sounds like a lot for anyone to bear, and I wish there was someone here who could understand what you're going through. But there's not. And I don't know what we can do to help you. Do you?"

Luke shook his head, allowing himself to feel his pain and misgivings, but keeping them tucked inside with everything else. Maybe there was a chance that Kodra would understand. "I guess not. There are no Jedi left, there are only Sith. And I have to hide from him until I'm ready, so…."

"Hide from Vader? Why?" Boss shook his head. "After all you've said about your relationship—"

"No, from Palpatine, I told you that!" Luke tucked his hands under his thighs to warm them. "It's really cold in here."

Distractedly, Narra pushed a button and the flow of cool air slowed. "What are you…?"

"I've been studying my Sith tapes and—"

"Sith tapes?"

"You have to know your enemy," Luke reminded them.

"But your father is the Sith Lord! He's not your enemy… or— or is he?" Boss almost stuttered.

That was going too far. "Of course not! But there are only two Sith at a time, the Master and the Apprentice!"

"So…." Narra shook his head, obviously as confused as Boss. "Does that mean… are you Vader's Apprentice?"

"Seriously?" Luke huffed in exasperation. "No, my dad is the Apprentice! Palpatine is the Master!"

They were staring hard at him, and he twitched uncomfortably.

"Are you saying," Boss choked out the words, "that the Emperor is a Sith?"

"Doesn't everyone know that?" Luke asked, bewildered. "His Sith name is Darth Sidious."

"What? Are you sure? Where— how— who told you?"

"Who do you think told me?" He'd just assumed that everyone knew. Although now that he thought about it, he hadn't known until his dad… oh… wait, his dad had reminded him, so he must have known a long time ago and forgotten. Had he ever even thought about Palpatine before coming to his father?

He is my Master, I must obey.

"No…." But Narra was only reacting with dismay, not questioning his words. "We need Dodonna and Willard in here."

He spoke into his com while Luke groaned to Boss. "They hate me. This will make everything worse. Can we wrap up my part before they get here? Like… can I have some body parts or corpses to practice on?"

Narra finished his com and his expression mirrored Boss's disgust. "Oz— Luke— What do you want them for?"

He chewed on his lower lip. "Well… to see if I can dissolve them or blow them up."

Boss swore on deities Luke had never heard of. "Why? Why? How could you even come up with such a Sith-forsaken idea?"

"From Vader," Narra said flatly.

"I—Yes— No, Yoda— I mean, it just happened when I was with Yoda. And I made a mess the other night when I blew up that thing in the jungle, so I need to learn how to do it properly. I have to practice."

"Force almighty!" Boss kept shaking his head. "Just— just stop and save yourself!"

That was a new one. Luke tilted his head. "How?" he asked curiously. "From what?"

Boss stood and shoved his chair. It clattered to the floor, startling them. "Get away from Vader! Damnit— save yourself!"

"I'd rather save him!" he snapped, standing and backing away, afraid of what he might do if he lost his own temper.

The door was pushed open. Boss picked up the chair and quickly sat. Luke followed his lead and dropped back down.

"Save who?" Dodonna demanded as he and General Willard entered.

"Let's table that discussion for later," Narra said quickly. "We just learned some incredibly important and shocking information from… Luke."

"What is it?" The two generals joined Narra at the table like they were the judges and Luke was the defendant… like it was Luke and Boss versus them… except that Narra turned his chair to a neutral position as if distancing himself from what was certain to be a violent storm.

"You mean… like dissolving corpses?" That seemed like the lesser crime right at this moment. He hoped that he looked harmless.

"No!" Narra said, exasperated. "Tell them what you told us about the Emperor."

"I thought everyone knew." He raised his hands in an unconsciously protective position. "Palpatine is a Sith Lord. The big one. The Master. My father just… reports to him. He's the Apprentice."

In the distance he could hear the sound of rattling equipment and the voices of crew members in the hangar and desperately wished he was there and not here.

"He's a what?" Dodonna asked slowly.

"I thought everyone knew." Luke decided repetition was his best defense. "Is it supposed to be a secret?"

"A Sith…?" Willard folded his hands like he was going to pray but instead leaned them on his forehead. "This changes everything."

The silence lengthened and grew quietly oppressive as the others considered the repercussions of the revelation. Luke managed to not fidget and not speak. He wondered if it was time to open up to his father, but decided to try to handle things himself. There is no try.

"Are you sure?"

He nodded to General Dodonna. "His name is Darth Sidious."

It got quieter and quieter until Luke thought he could hear everyone's heartbeats. Maybe he could.

"I wish we could take apart your mind and learn what else is in there," Dodonna muttered darkly, and Luke cringed inside.

"How do we fight two Sith when we have no Jedi?" Willard said heavily.

"One," Luke corrected without… thinking first.

Willard obviously didn't understand what he'd said. "So you're a Jedi now?"

"No! I'm not a Jedi! I never will be, I don't… approve of what they do."

Dodonna stroked his beard. "Then you're a Sith?"

"No! Why do I have to be one or the other? I'm just a Force… user." He frowned. If someday he had to decide…. "I guess I could be a Sith. Maybe. They use their emotions. Jedi are so… they aren't passionate about anything… that's what I understand anyway. They try to be neutral. But… I've known two Jedi and maybe they had the right reasons, but they did the wrong things." He studied his fingernails, appreciating that the prosthetic nails never seemed to get grease underneath. Maybe they were glued flat to his fingers. He hadn't looked at them closely and suddenly they were very interesting. "And the Sith are angry and I get angry, so…."

"Everyone gets angry," Boss said gently. "You're not an angry person, Luke. Though you try to hide it, you have a gentle heart."

"Can you forgo the counseling session for now?" Willard asked, but not rudely, as he finally caught up with the conversation. "We have a bigger problem. Oz, why did you say there's one Jedi?"

He didn't bother to correct his name. "I didn't! I meant that for practical purposes, there's only one Sith, not two, because my father and I will stand together against Sidious. We just have to figure out how and when. And I have to complete my training." He sent a pointed look at Narra. "I need to practice so I can save my father from Sidious."

"You're so damned young," Willard said, sounding almost pitying. "Vader can't be 'saved', whatever that means to you. He's done too much to too many."

He trembled inside but refused to let them see. "Like I did by blowing up the Death Star? You covered that up and blamed Biggs. You protected me— why can't you protect him? If I can complete my training and help him and we can—"

"You don't know everything he's done. He's a monster. And why you think he would side with you over the Emperor is—"

"Of course I know everything he's done, probably more than you do." Maybe he shouldn't have said that. "And while I realize he's responsible for millions of deaths, I don't think he's ever managed two million with a single torpedo. That I recall, anyway." He added the last caveat because he simply didn't know if it was true. "Does that make me a monster?"

Boss cursed again and leaned toward him— too close, but Luke refused to rear back an inch. "Are you that naive? You can't separate Vader's actions from the Emperor's— the galaxy knows what he's done as Palpatine's enforcer, and everyone, even Imperials hate him—"

"No they don't! His officers are loyal— the 501 is loyal— people who really know him are loyal!"

"Like you?" Dodonna asked though it wasn't truly a question.

"Yes, like me. But I'm different because..." Luke hesitated. "...I love him. He's my dad."

"Oz—"

"Luke! And why are you getting so righteous all of a sudden?" Luke demanded. "You take his credits to keep me. I guess you're not so fussy about blood when it comes to blood money. And if he joins us and I can help him take down Sidious—"

Narra put his head in his hands. "Luke, you're barely out of childhood—"

"What? Are you kidding?" None of them would look him in the eyes. "You don't know what my father has been through or what I've been through. You don't know what happened to make him into what he is."

"The thing is," Willard said heavily, "we don't care what happened to him. We have to deal with Palpatine being a Sith. Your father is what he is."

"And I am what I am. And you don't know what to do with me, none of you. You try to corral me, make me fit into the box where normal people fit, but I'm not normal." His gaze flicked over Dodonna and Willard, sensing what they tried to hide from him. "You want me gone— preferably dead, but you're afraid what would happen if you kill me." Or try to, he added privately. Good luck with that.

"Ah, no!" Narra protested. "We don't want to kill you!"

"They're already considering it," he stated, nodding toward the two generals, "if they could figure out an accident. Why do you think they're telling you to reconsider my piloting request? That would make an accident so much easier. Old ships malfunction now and then."

Narra shook his head, but looked at the others with doubt reverberating in his voice. "Tell me that's not true."

Dodonna's unreadable expression didn't change. "We must have contingencies in place."

"Wait," Boss frowned at them. "Are you saying that you've seriously considered murder and actually have a plan in place?"

"Not murder," Willard replied, "neutralization. The possibility of accidental death has been discussed. We have no plans— it was just an idea we tossed around."

"Tossed around?" Boss said exactly what Luke was thinking. "You would murder a sixteen-year-old boy because of who his father is? That's not the Alliance I serve."

"Not because of his father," Willard snapped, "because of him! He wants to dissolve people! That's sick and perverted— does that sound like the Alliance any of us serve?"

"Not people!" Luke interjected desperately. "Just Palpatine!"

That shut them up for a moment, so he took the opportunity to plead his case— or for his life. "Palpatine isn't going away. The only way to defeat him is for my father and I to confront him together. What in seven hells do you think I've been doing all this training and studying for? If I don't practice and learn to dissolve him from a distance, I'll have to be too close to him and he'll kill me and my father can't do it alone. I need to practice."

"We'll find a place you can use and have all the practice time you need, Luke," Narra said quietly, "but not with bodies. I won't allow it. There's a point…." He hesitated. "When someone is corrupted too much, there's no going back to any semblance of a human being. I don't want that to happen to you."

"The way it did to Vader," Dodonna grumbled, and Narra gave him an exasperated look.

But Narra's words plumbed the depth of his fears about himself and his father. Maybe there was no redemption for his dad. Maybe there wouldn't be any for him if he followed too closely behind Vader.

So what? What the hell was 'redemption' anyway? Another Jedi mind-control trick intended to keep the Knights in line?

"I understand your misgivings," Luke said slowly. "And I'll… respect your directions." Maybe. "But I will never give up on my father. He is a human being. He's a man who can love and be loved. I will do whatever I can to save him, no matter what you think or say." He tried to smile, but he was exhausted. "But he'll do the same for me and I'm afraid… I'm afraid that's how we could lose everything." The last words were soft and meant only for himself, and he knew the others wouldn't understand.

Because, in the deepest recesses of his heart, he knew that for both his father and himself 'losing everything' meant losing each other, not failure to free the galaxy from Palpatine's iron rule.

He shook off his pain and stood. "Permission to get back to work."

"Permission granted," Narra said quietly.

He hesitated a moment to see if anyone would say more to him, but they were silent. He turned to leave, but remembered: "Oh, yeah... there's an agent here. Maybe from Palpatine. I don't know who it is yet, but I'll figure it out. In the meanwhile…." This time he considered before he spoke and decided it was wise. "Keep an eye on the new mech Tadeo. And his brother."

He pulled the door closed behind him and sucked in a deep breath that was heavy with humidity and heat. If it were drier, he could pretend he was still home on Tatooine, safe. He checked on the temporary shield that he'd built between him and his father and decided to leave it in place for awhile longer.

At least until he could figure out how to explain what he'd done. And to decide if he wanted to ask about his mother.

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