For a few moments the head on John's shoulder stopped working and the head between his legs took over. And that moment was all Mary needed to grab at him and move the both of them so that they were on the bed, him falling onto his back and Mary climbing on top of him.
John broke away from the kiss to gasp in a breath. "Mary, I think we should..." whatever he was about to say was cut off when Mary moved back enough to pull her shirt off, a stubborn look in her eyes.
She was beautiful, there was no denying that, there was no ignoring that and he wasn't trying to. She was covered in faded over scars, multiple cases of being cut and teeth being buried in her skin but even those were beautiful to him. It showed what she went through and how strong she was to not only have survived, but to still be this stubborn and sure of herself.
He loved it and he was sure that he loved her.
"Mary." he said, trying to get her attention. She just smiled down at him, reaching to tug his shirt open, eyes darkening when she saw his tattoos on his chest.
John reached up and grabbed at her hands, holding them tightly so that they couldn't roam anymore, sitting up with her still on his lap. "Mary, stop." he told her.
Mary stared at him, working her wrists slightly. He let them go, rubbing at them apologetically.
"Mary," he said once more, trying to find the right words. "We can't do this, not right now."
Mary tilted her head, putting her hands down. "Why?" she asked. "You said, you don't want to be in front of the kids." She made a point of looking around the room. "No kids here."
"Just because the kids aren't here, doesn't mean that we can do it." John told her.
"Why not?" Mary asked pouting at him. It was adorable and it gave him something to focus on instead of down at her bare chest.
"Because," John said, stalling slightly as he tried to find the right words. "I'm not ready for this."
Mary raised an eyebrow at that, glancing down between them to where they could both feel him straining against his jeans. "You sure?"
John nodded, stubbornly refused to acknowledge anything that was happening there. "That's biological, it's not mental." he said, carefully placing his hands on her hips for lack of anywhere else to put them. "Mary...I just feel that...you're not doing this for the right reasons."
At that, Mary looked a bit almost offended again. "I'm not a child." she told him tensely. "I'm not. I get it."
"But I'm the only adult in your life." John told her. "I don't want you to think you have to do anything with me because you're...obligated or you just think you should or..."
"I want to." Mary said simply. "You're over-complicating everything. It's sex."
"It's more than sex." John said, reaching behind them for Mary's shirt and slowly pulling it back onto her. She allowed him to do so, looking very put out as he did.
Letting out a deep breath, he continued. "Mary, I want to, I really do." he said, grabbing her hands when she moved to take her shirt off again to stop her. "Stop that, I'm not done."
He rubbed at her hands with his thumbs, holding them gently. "I know you're not a child, I know you're aware of everything. I know that you don't feel like you're doing this for any other reason other than you want to." he said. "I just don't feel comfortable yet."
"When will you feel comfortable?" Mary asked him, reaching for his shirt instead. He let her move it to the side enough to show the rest of his tattoos.
"I don't know." he said honestly. "I look at you and I want to but at the same time, I keep remembering what those vampires did to you. I keep remembering how they hurt you and I keep remembering that you're still recovering and-"
"I'm okay." Mary injected. She reached up and placed her hands on his shoulders. "I'm fine, I promise. I'm here."
"I know, I know sweetheart." John said, bowing his head slightly. "Just...be a bit more patient with me? Just wait for me a bit longer, alright?"
Mary stared at him but then nodded, relaxing on his lap and her hands. John nodded as well, sighing as he leaned forward to press his forehead to her shoulder.
"How long?" she asked, her hand coming to the back of his head.
"I don't know." John said honestly. "I just need some time to get used to seeing you...not just as someone from a hunt. But as a woman, as a partner. I just...I don't want to feel like I'm taking advantage of you."
"You're not." Mary told him, still stroking at his short hair. "But...try not to take too long?"
John laughed at that, moving his head back to look up at her with a fond smile. "I'll try." he promised her. He watched her fondly for a moment before he reached up, cupping her cheek.
Mary leaned into his touch, smiling as well. "Can we kiss?" she asked hopefully.
Staring at her, John couldn't bring himself to deny her that much. "Yeah." he whispered, moving up to kiss her, wrapping his free arm around her. Mary hummed happily as she pressed into the kiss as well, moving on his lap to kiss him deeper.
This much he could do.
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