***I am pressing pause on Certain Things just for today to share this little piece that was sent to me by my good friend and fellow author Vrskaandrea. She has been an amazing source of help and encouragement for me since beginning my journey into writing fan fiction, so it is with much pride and great appreciation that I share this with you all today. I have made no changes except to correct one spelling error, other than that this is the exact text she sent me. I could have posted it as a one shot but I felt this would be the perfect place for it. So please sit back and enjoy this little sidetrack written by GUEST AUTHOR VRSKAANDREA . If you enjoyed it be sure to jump over to her profile and check out her other stories and leave her a message to let her know!***

Heart made of stone

Caleb was different after he and Sam found Dean... After he found Kayla. Sam and Bobby chucked it off to just being weirded out by the fact that his drinking buddy gave birth and was now a mother/father to a little girl. That's why nobody said anything when Caleb started retreating to his truck every evening just before dinner. He would stay in it for a half an hour or so, finish a beer and come back to the house. They always thought he just needed a bit of peace and quiet, not being accustomed to kids.

They were wrong.

Caleb sat in the trunk, a bottle in his hand and his laptop on the passenger seat. He was staring at it with a mostly blank expression, only a hint of a frown above his eyes. Not even in the privacy of his own car would he let that mask slip, afraid that if it did, he wouldn't be able to pull it back on. He couldn't afford to break.

So every evening he would take a few minutes to himself. Well, not really to himself. He would dedicate that time to Kayla. To try and find anything and everything he could about her. He wasn't really a computer genius nor a good researcher, so he couldn't scour the social media for any sighting of her in any pictures posted on Facebook, Instagram or whatever. But he could take whatever piece of information Dean gave or let slip and start there.

Like the diner where she was sighted. Taking the date he assumed she was there, he was able to look through some photos taken there. What was it with people and posting pictures of their food? But luckily, they tagged a place and he was able to find a picture where a disgusting teen with acne was stuffing his face with a burger. There it the background was Dean, with a slight bump barely visible. ***

He tried to find any trace of those demons that came after Dean and Kayla, hoping to get his hands on one of them and strangle the smoke out of him for just thinking of touching his little girl... God, he was a father. A freaking father. Of the most adorable little kid he ever set his eyes on. And she was his, he could see a bit of himself in her eyes, he could see she had his chin, the one he had as a kid before it was scarred and broken during hunts.

Caleb sighed and focused on his computer. He couldn't afford to think like that, he really shouldn't. Kayla was Deans, not his. She will never be his little girl. No, he will just be that awkward overprotective uncle that wasn't really related to the family in any way. He couldn't let himself go there. So he just isolated himself whenever he wanted to establish any kind of emotional connection, opting to find more about the first year of his daughter's life from what he could piece together.

Dean said she was born in a convent hospice in Canada. He found pictures of the place, every possible angle of every possible building and the layout of the inside. He found the layout of the room Dean probably gave birth. There was a blurry picture of the room and if Caleb squinted his eyes, he could see the bed that his baby girl was probably delivered in. And if he closed his eyes, he could imagine himself there, and hear her first cry.

"Focus!" Caleb shouted at himself, focusing his tears away.

After some digging he found the Serbian nun Dean mentioned. He typed her name in the Google search and got a bunch of irrelevant results and dead ends. But her exact name was mentioned in a summary of a website, so he clicked on it.

Suddenly, the trunk was filled with a soft ballad music that played in the background of the site that spoke of a Serbian/Macedonian singer that died in a tragic car accident, leaving behind a broken fiancé. The site showed the lyrics of the current song both in Serbian and in English. Caleb had no idea why, but he felt so drawn to the music and to the mesmerising voice of Toshe Proeski as he sang the song he never got to see published in his lifetime. There was something so soothing about the whole song that reminded him so much of his current situation.

Serbian: „Она има очи које знају моје тајне све, моје туге све и моје немире, она има руке и у њима свемир читави, у том загрљају могу умрети.

Боже мени тако мало треба испод овог светог неба, топла постеља и њена ока два, шаљи анђеле чуваре своје, јер је душа душе моје, брани је од зла, Боже кад не могу ја, Боже, брани је од зла..."

English: " She has those kinds of eyes that know all my secrets, all my sorrows and all my troubles, she has hands and in them the whole universe, I would die happy in those arms.

Lord, I need so little under this holy sky, a warm bed and her two eyes, send thy guardian angels, because she is the soul of my soul, keep her save from harm, Lord, when I can't, Lord, keep her from harm..."

Caleb felt like he had a bump stuck in his throat, one he couldn't swallow. There was a pretty good chance he would never be able to look in those eyes and have them look up at him with wonder, knowing that was her father that did something cool. There was a pretty good chance he would never be able to feel those arms hug him as warmly as they would her father. And a pretty good chance he won't be there to protect her from the evil of the world, supernatural or human.

The next day, Caleb disappeared for two hours and when he came back, it was with a new tattoo. He wouldn't let them see it, simply claiming it was a sort of a protection spell he found and decided to get tattooed. It wasn't really a lie.

No, Caleb did find a special mixture of herbs that combined with a protection spell made it into a liquid which he then used as ink for his tattoo that said:

"Боже, чувај је од зла јер је душа душе моје"

Translation: "Lord, keep her safe from harm as she is the soul of my soul."

Only a drop of Kayla's saliva was added to the mix to make sure that whatever serious harm should dare fall upon her, it would be immediately transferred to him. After all, it was a father's job to keep his child safe. And one way or another, Caleb will do that for Kayla.

*** I am not sure if Dean was pregnant then or has she already given birth, so feel free to change what's in that picture.

Here is the song as written in cirilic, which are the official Serbian letters, Macedonian too. But if you think it is better, I have re-written it in Latin too. My name as well. (ш, or š is ponounced as SH, like in SHOE)

Она има очи које знају моје тајне све, моје туге све и моје немире, она има руке и у њима свемир читави, у том загрљају могу умрети.

Боже мени тако мало треба испод овог светог неба, топла постеља и њена ока два, шаљи анђеле чуваре своје, јер је душа душе моје, брани је од зла, Боже кад не могу ја, Боже, брани је од зла.

Ona ima oči koje znaju moje tajne sve, moje tuge sve i moje nemire, ona ima ruke i u njima svemir čitavi, u tom zagrljaju mogu umreti.

Bože meni tako malo treba ispod ovog svetog neba, topla postelja i njena oka dva, šalji anđele čuvare svoje jer je duša duše moje, brani je od zla Bože kad ne mogu ja, Bože brani je od zla.

Андреа Вршка

Andrea Vrška