Rose
I walk through the camp, leaving the soldiers' barracks and heading for the medical tent. Lewis still has his own tent, but he stays close to the medical tent. Mum insisted, just in case he needs more help. He seems fine to me, but if he wants to keep following her orders, that's his choice.
Stop that, I remind myself. You're going to make up, not keep fighting about Mum.
I haven't talked to my brother since our fight at training earlier today. He didn't come to dinner at mess hall tonight like he has for the past two weeks. It's unlikely his leg is bothering him. He probably just doesn't want to see me.
I meant what I said earlier. I'm furious with Mum and Uncle Peter for all the secrets and lies. Every time I think about how we were always running, never making friends, never allowed to have anything normal, my heart pounds and my stomach flips and it all feels so unfair. But that's not Lewis' fault. He's always the one person I've had to talk to and count on. I don't want to lose that.
After passing by the clanking metal of the forge and the chatter of soldiers gathered around campfires, I reach Lewis' tent.
"Knock, knock."
"Come in."
I duck inside the tent flap. Lewis is sitting on his bedroll, book in his lap.
"Are you ever not reading?" I ask.
"What do you want?"
I sigh. "Look, I came to say that I'm sorry. I shouldn't have yelled at you earlier."
He closes the book and sets it on a small pile on the ground next to him. "It's okay. I shouldn't have been so mean to Talla."
"Yeah, you shouldn't have." I sit on the edge of his bedroll, careful not to bump his legs. "Listen, I'm still mad at Mum and Uncle Peter, and I don't get how you're not upset about them keeping this whole world and our dad and our royal destiny from us. But I know you're probably having a harder time staying busy and making friends with your leg wrapped up, and I didn't mean to make you feel like I didn't want to talk to you."
"I'm not not upset. I just... I don't really know how I feel right now." He takes a deep breath. "This world, this life, it's a lot to take in. And it's a little weird seeing you become this amazing fighter when we're about to head into a real war. It's going to be dangerous, you know? Actually, really life-threatening dangerous. What happens if you get hurt?" He pauses and clears his throat. "And we're royals now. That's a lot of responsibility, too. What happens after the war? Do we go back home? Do we have to wear crowns and make policies? Will Mum have to go back to England like she always did when she came here before? There's so much we don't know."
"I guess I hadn't thought about that." I stare down at the ground. "I'm just glad to be here now. I always felt so... so bored and trapped and lonely back home. Now I have friends and a purpose. I'm a soldier, with training and a mission. I'm strong. I'm useful."
"I miss home." His voice cracks.
I look up at him. His face is screwed up like he's trying not to cry. "I'm sorry. I wish I could help you feel better. But I don't miss our old life. I just want to enjoy this new one now that I have it."
"We're pretty different for twins, aren't we?"
"I think brothers and sisters are supposed to fight sometimes."
He laughs. "That's what Nova said, too."
"Who's Nova?"
"After... well, while you were training today, this girl came to share my tree. Her name is Nova. She dresses funny. She said she has a condition that makes her sick under the sun, or something like that. But she was really nice."
I think I know the girl he's talking about. I've never seen her at training, but she walks around camp sometimes with a scarf on her head and funny-looking spectacles. "See? I'm not the only one making friends."
I smile. "Okay, okay, you were right. It's nice to have other friends. I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry too." I stand up. "I'm heading back to the campfire. Want to come?"
He shakes his head. "I'm going to keep reading."
"Eventually you're going to run out of books."
He shrugs. "I haven't yet."
I exit the tent to walk back to the soldiers' barracks, my shoulders feeling a little bit lighter.
