Yosuke took me to the Samegawa riverbank with a serious look on his face.
He sighed. "There's something I wanted to tell you."bout it. I think of everyone, I wanted to be acknowledged by you the most... So... I want you to hit me! Give me a good one. Knock out all this crap inside of me. I want to be equal with you. I want us to stand shoulder-to-shoulder. So c'mon."
Yosuke raised his arms slightly and closed his eyes.
"Can we fight for real?" I asked, looking at the ground. "I want you to knock all this crap inside me, too."
He opened his eyes. "But... you're a girl. I can't do that to you."
I smirked. "It's okay. I can take it. Besides... we all fought Shadows before. I'm sure this is gonna be nothing."
He frowned. "I don't know..."
"Yosuke. It's fine. Really. Let's do it. Besides, in this damn fog, no one can see a thing."
"Are you sure?"
I laughed. "Call it self defense, all right?"
And I swung at him.
After our brawl, we lay on the ground, panting.
"Damn, for a girl, you sure pack a punch."
"Thanks. But I'm pretty sure Chie could do better."
"Nah, she's all kicks."
"True."
"... The sky's so high up. Is Saki-senpai watching us...? Is she smiling at us? Senpai... I'm going to live. Without lying to myself, without deceiving myself... Days like today, days like before when I did nothing... They're all important days... They're all days you didn't live to see... I'm going to live them here." Yosuke smiled.
Like the others, his Persona evolved.
He now had a sky blue jumpsuit and red gloves and boots. His bright red hair swirled upward. His collar had long spikes around it. A large, metal, spiky ring orbited the Persona.
"Susano-o, huh?" Yosuke breathed. "The power to protect those dear to me... just like I wanted." He looked at me. "Let's keep at it, so we can live every day with a smile... Leader."
He held out his fist.
"Yes, let's." I bumped it with mine.
We continued to lay there for a while.
Yosuke shifted. "Now... are you gonna tell me about what you talked to Adachi about?"
I sighed. "Right... Well, I just asked him why he did what he did. And about our bond. He said it was all fake. I said it wasn't, but he just said I was dumb and shooed me outta there."
"He's just a psycho. I wouldn't worry about it too much."
"... I guess. But maybe I killed the relationship with my selfishness. Maybe it really was all in my head. I guess I shouldn't have the right to be upset."
Yosuke sat up. "He's killed two people because he was bored! Get a grip!"
I winced. "I know, I know... I'm just making excuses at this point... But," I sighed, "if I mess up... the whole world is gonna pay."
His eyes widened. He looked at the ground, grimacing. "... I'm sorry. You're worrying about all that, and I still dragged you out here to complain about my problems..."
"No, it's fine. I completely understand." I sighed and sat up.
"Well, whatever happens, we're all here with you. We won't let you make stupid mistakes, and I know you won't let us make any, either."
I smiled. "Thanks, Yosuke. I think I needed to hear that."
He patted my back. "No problem. Now let's go grab some food! I'm starving!"
He stood up and held his hand out. I took it, and he pulled me up.
"Let's get Souzai Daigaku," I said. "I'm craving steak skewers."
"'Craving'? Don't tell me you're on your period!" he snickered.
I smacked him. "No, I'm not! And why would I tell you if I was on it, anyway?"
I sat at the work table that evening, making paper cranes.
"The power to protect those dear to me..."
I had that power. But here I was, still hesitating. Still letting Adachi get to me. Still letting my Shadow's words control me while the world was in danger.
I sighed. Yosuke's right. I'm not alone. I don't have to do everything myself. But... I don't want to use them like I did before. And I don't want to put everyone in jeopardy.
After school the next day, I found Kanji staring into the sewing room as usual.
"Hey Kanji," I said.
"Oh, hey Senpai. What's up?"
"Wanna grab a bite?"
He frowned. "Do we have time for that right now?"
I forced a smile. "Well, the world's gonna end at the end of the month, so we have time, don't we? We need to be in tip top shape if we want to beat Adachi."
"I guess."
"So you have a place in mind?"
Kanji took me to Aiya.
"Chie-senpai said the steak bowls are great. And hey, she's the expert."
I laughed. "I don't know. She also said the steak skewers at Souzai Daigaku were tender."
"... That's true."
Two police officers approached us, eyeing Kanji.
One said, "You're Kanji Tatsumi, right? I'd like to have a word with you."
Kanji scowled. "Huh? Well, I wouldn't."
"Kanji didn't do anything wrong," I said.
"So what if we hang out? What's it to you?" Kanji asked.
"You know there's been a group of teenage bullies lurking around here, don't you? We got a tip saying you were threatening a kid at the hill and flood plain."
I stepped forward. "This must be a misunderstanding. The kid asked Kanji for help with something."
"And what is that 'something'?"
Kanji balked, and the officer sneered. He continued, "You two are going to have to come with us down to the station."
Kanji stepped in front of me. "Wait a sec! Senpai's got nothin' to do with this!"
"Oh, mister. What are you doing here?" I glanced beside me. It was the kid we helped earlier.
"You know these people, kid?" the officer asked. "Did this boy ask you for anything? For instance, did he claim he lost his money?"
Kanji's gritted his teeth and glared at him.
The kid looked at him. "You lost your money, Mister? You can have some of mine!"
The officer grinned. "Just as I thought."
But the kid continued. "Oh, but I came today to give you the cookies Mom baked as thanks."
"Thanks for what?" the officer asked.
The kid beamed. "He made me a bunch of dolls! He's real good!"
Kanji's face grew red as I tried not to laugh.
The officer's eyes widened. "Dolls? Tatsumi made them? There's no way I'd believe that."
"You better believe it, sir," I said. "They're small and cute, and they don't even look like they're handmade! Like, oh my god, it's amazing—"
"Senpai. I get what I need to do now." Kanji nodded at me.
And then he told them everything that happened with the kid.
"What are you doing with my Kanji?" His mother had approached us. She glared at them.
The officers tried to explain the bullying, but Mrs. Tatsumi cut them off. "He has nothing to do with that. He would never do such a thing. He may be stupid and short-tempered, but he's a strong and gentle child. Why, just the other day, he showed me his dolls and told me I could put them up for sale."
"Mom... you'd believe me over the police?" Kanji stared at her, eyes wide as saucers.
"You would never do such a thing. A mother knows." And she left.
Kanji turned away from us and sniffled.
"Mister, are you crying?"
I patted Kanji's back and turned to the kid. "Thanks for helping us out there," I said.
"You're welcome! Oh, here's the cookies my mom baked." The kid held the cookies to Kanji.
Kanji took it without looking at him. "Thanks."
"Okay, bye, mister!" The kid ran off.
I turned to Kanji. "So you wanna eat at Aiya still?"
He nodded.
When I got back to my room, Chie called me, asking when we would go in to confront Adachi.
My mood soured. Adachi was the last thing I wanted to think about right now.
I sat at the working table and took out the fabric and tools.
Goyoku-Izanagi grumbled within me.
"I know, I know!" I snapped. "I know I'm just running away."
I put my head on the table. "... I know."
Kanji and I worked on Naoto's gift again.
After half the day was gone, we've finished the Goyoku-Izanagi doll. Finally.
I picked it up and dangled it. It was a little deformed. His right leg was a little too long, his sword was flimsy, and his head was asymmetrical.
"... It doesn't look too great. I'm glad I decided to do him first before we did Sukuna-Hikona."
"Well, it's also your first time. Ya did fine."
"I guess." I stood up and stretched my back.
"Wanna take a walk?" Kanji asked, standing up.
"That'd be great." I pocketed the doll.
We headed out. The streets were almost completely empty. The sun barely pierced through the fog.
Kanji scratched his head. "The other day... I went to visit my dad's grave. It's the first time I went on my own. Well, I had a lot to tell him."
"How was it?" I asked.
"Well, uh... I felt like I could finally face him. A little late, though." He smiled, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "Dad told me somethin' right before he died: 'If you're a man, you have to become strong.' I felt like he was telling me I wasn't a real man. Pissed me off. So I changed my looks and pushed myself away from people. Fighting gangs, thinking I was protecting Mom...Trying to catch this killer... I thought alla that was how I was becoming strong. I was drunk off my 'power.'" He looked at the sky. "But... that wasn't it. That ain't what Dad meant. I still don't get what bein' 'strong' means, but I'm gonna start by not lyin' to myself. No more being scared of everyone, hiding my hobbies, staying away from people... Anytime, any place, I'm gonna bust right through as my own self! That's the way to deal with that 'other me' in the TV world. As long as there's someone like that snot-nosed kid to accept me, I ain't afraid of nothin'!"
"I'm so proud of you, Kanji," I said.
"Ma'am, it's all thanks to you!" He beamed.
I laughed. "But you had the strength to do it. I think you're stronger than you realize."
He shook his head. "Nah. You just gotta put your mind to it!"
"Easier said than done." I smiled at him. "But you did it."
The next day, I went over to Kanji's place again to finish up Sukuna-Hikona.
We spent the entire day trying to perfect it, but it still ended up looking lopsided. His head was a little too big, and his arms were too long and uneven.
"Me and my fat fingers," I sighed, leaning back.
"You just started sewing, Senpai. I think you did great." He beamed at me.
I rolled my eyes. "You don't have to sugarcoat it, Kanji."
"I'm not!"
"Sure."
"You should just give it to him. It's kinda cute."
"Just kinda!?"
He shrugged. "It's got that Misaki-senpai look."
I glared at him. "What's that supposed to mean?"
He gestured vaguely toward the doll.
I shook my head. "Thanks, Kanji. Let's just go for a walk already. My back is killing me."
Again, no one was around. The fog was so thick, I could barely see 20 feet in front of me.
"Oh yeah. There's one more thing I figured out," Kanji said. "Rise stopped by our store the other day... She said the dolls were cute, so I told her I made 'em. Then she said that was creepy... It kinda stung, but I kept on showing her the other stuff I made... And in the end, she said, 'Maybe you're an amazing guy after all.'"
I laughed "That sounds like her."
He shook his head. "It pissed me off the way she said it, but that aside... I get it now... This is what he was talking about... Of course no one could understand me... I been keepin' my distance outta fear. So I decided that I'd do things my way, no matter how tough, but... You gotta make an effort if you want people to understand you. I wasn't even trying. But like, when the police suspected me... it didn't even cross my mind to try and tell 'em my story. I let 'em think whatever they want. And because of that, you, Ma, and that kid all got dragged into it. I didn't put in the slightest effort to try and make 'em understand... It's easier for me to act tough..." He smirked. "So from now on I got two rules: Rule one! Be myself. Rule two! Get people to understand me. I want you to have this, Senpai."
He handed me a cute strap. It had all the colors of our glasses on it.
"Thank you, Kanji."
"This thing's me being me. Now I can say it straight out... That 'other me' is me."
Take-Mikazuchi appeared before us. A bright light enveloped him, and when it faded, another Persona appeared.
He was a buff, red robot, with flame designs on his arms and legs. He was holding a long sword shaped like a flame.
Kanji stared at it as it faded away. "This... For reals...!? I get it... So I've become a little stronger, huh...? You're my hero, dude... And my best bud!" He elbowed me.
"Thanks, Kanji. I... I'm glad I could help you."
He smiled. "C'mon, let's go back."
I stared into the fog as we walked back into town.
I can't believe that the two worlds are going to collide. What am I doing? I should go in there, but...
My hands were shaking. I shoved them into my pockets.
"Is something botherin' you, Senpai?" Kanji was looking at me with a frown.
"No, it's fine."
He stepped in front of me. "Senpai."
"... It's just... I can't believe the world is gonna end."
"Then let's go in there and kick Adachi's ass! What're ya waiting for?"
I looked at the ground. "I'm... scared." I sighed. "... I'm scared that if I mess up, everyone's going to turn into Shadows. I feel like this is way bigger than anything we've faced... even Namatame."
"You gotta believe in yourself, Senpai. We made it this far, didn't we?" He smiled.
I chuckled. "I guess we did."
"And it's all thanks to you, Senpai."
"Nonsense. You guys made it all possible." I smiled. "... But thank you."
I sat at the work table, making cranes for Nanako again.
Kanji was right. No, everyone was right. We made it this far... together. We had each other's backs, even when I was just using them at first. Even when Adachi placed the seeds of doubt in my mind. We could do it.
But... just the thought of Nanako not being able to see the world had to offer made me freeze up. Hell, she died once! I couldn't let it happen again.
It was a selfish thought, I know. But that was what I was worried about most.
I glanced out the window and into the fog.
I wonder if I can borrow Kanji's strength... to face Adachi.
