Chapter 68: Forevermore
Impermanence clings to everything
Where few things can, it persists
Even life, in its way, must end
But love is forever
Ashley was waiting at the dock when Terra went back to the Normandy. Hackett had asked her to join the fleet, but since she was a Spectre now, she could technically dictate her own assignment if she thought there was a better place for her. So Terra gladly accepted her request to rejoin the Normandy crew. After taking a second to warn her about EDI's new body.
Before they headed out for a new setting, though, Terra received a call from a certain Aria T'Loak with a proposition. She was hesitant to go along with it, but she did. Aria met her in a skycar, taking her on a drive around the docks and back (too many eyes and ears in Purgatory, she claimed) to explain what was going on: Cerberus had taken Omega from her as a tactically powerful position and she wanted it back in exchange for a hefty supply of ammo and troops even Terra would find hard to turn down.
"Why do I get the feeling there's a catch to this?" Terra asked.
"Just one," Aria assured her, "I have some objections to the company you keep, so you'd have to leave the Normandy and her crew behind."
Terra immediately waved her off. "Out of the question. I have people that matter to me on that ship that I am not leaving for that long. Not to mention the last time I went on a mission without my squad, I wound up having to blow up a mass relay to keep the Reapers from getting here too soon."
Aria smirked. "I appreciate your loyalty, but this is a deal-breaker. It's not like you'd be going in completely solo this time."
"I still don't like the idea of leaving my ship unattended."
"It'll be waiting in the Citadel system, which you just ensured is still the safest place in the galaxy."
"You're really not budging, are you?"
She shrugged. "Let's just say…I want you all to myself."
Terra liked this even less now, but Aria was relentless and making a great offer. If it was best for the galaxy, she had to do it. So when she went back to the ship, she reluctantly asked Joker to cross the system to rendezvous with Aria's fleet.
Naturally, Garrus met her in the CIC. "We're moving again already? Where we headed?"
Terra wouldn't deny that some small part of her had been hoping to sneak out before he noticed, but she could never do that to him. "Aria wants me to help her retake Omega."
Garrus had become too well-versed in reading between her words not to catch the "alone" behind these. "Terra, going with Samara was one thing. This—"
"It's taking a whole host of assets from Cerberus and she'll give us resources we need. I have to at least try."
"Not without me."
"Oh, believe me, I tried to argue that." She sighed. "Doesn't matter. I need you here."
He gave her a wary look. "Is this that 'keep the ship safe' excuse again?"
"It actually applies now. The Reapers are in play and Cerberus could get cocky again." She looked down regretfully. "Plus, we have Violet now."
Ah. Garrus couldn't exactly argue with that. Well, he could try, at least point out that Violet was 30 years old and, civilian or not, strong enough to survive batarian slavery for half of her life. Not to mention Ashley, Javik, Liara, James, and EDI were all there to cover for him. It wouldn't matter what he said, though. The fact was that Terra wouldn't want to leave her sister in the first place after those 16 years and Garrus was the only one she would ever wholeheartedly trust to protect Violet in her stead, whether it was necessary or not. Time for him to step up as a mate should. So he sighed and relented. "Alright."
She let her relief and gratitude show as she met his eyes with a regretful but hopeful smile. "Thank you. Don't worry, I'll make it up to you when I get back."
He smirked. "I'm sure you will. What do we do until then?"
She shrugged. "I'm sure the crew could use some time off from worrying about war if they want to play on the Citadel while the cat's away."
"I wouldn't exactly call you a cat."
She rolled her eyes. "I was also implying you might show Violet around for me."
He hadn't been expecting that. But he could understand why she would suggest he take one of the opportunities she had been looking forward to herself—time for him and Violet to get acquainted so they could be more comfortable around each other, let Violet off the ship to see the galaxy her sister loved so much, etc. So he smiled to let her know he appreciated the suggestion. "That I can do."
This time, she showed her gratitude with a hug.
"Commander!" Joker called from the bridge, "We're on approach!"
Terra reluctantly began to pull away.
Garrus grabbed her by the arm before she got far. He couldn't stop her, but he had every intention of taking as much time as they could.
Seeing his point, she smiled again and leaned in to kiss him.
He took a moment to hold her close and savor each sensation. Then when they separated to catch their breath, he sadly watched her go and started counting the minutes until he'd see her again.
The Normandy was docked on the Citadel again inside of 15 minutes. Garrus was already wondering where Terra was and what she was doing right now, but he focused on heading down to the med bay. Terra could handle herself. He had another Shepard to worry about. One who was playing a somber tune on the violin when he stepped off the elevator onto deck 3. He didn't want to interrupt the song, so he kept his pace slow as he approached the med bay and only opened the door when the last note rang out.
Violet didn't flinch at the sight of him this time, merely nodding in greetings before turning to carefully place her instrument back in its box. Garrus couldn't help but admiringly notice how she gripped the bow the same way Terra would grip a paintbrush or pencil…or gun.
He shook off the thought, cautiously taking a few steps closer. "Terra's gonna be gone for a while."
She looked at him, the look in her eyes unsettled. "Where'd she go?"
"She took a mission in Terminus."
Violet knew she should've been worried, having heard about the dangerous, lawless region known as the Terminus Systems, but she had seen her sister stand fearlessly in battle and heard her speak of the Reapers encroaching on the entire galaxy as a hated enemy rather than an unstoppable force. She knew Terra would be fine. What really prompted her reaction was Garrus' presence to give the news. "You didn't go with her? You go everywhere with her."
He smirked. "Not this time. She needed me to stay with you."
She turned to gently stroke her violin case. "I don't need anyone to stay with me."
He took half a second to wonder if she would still have the objection had it been him sent on the mission and Terra staying behind. Then he moved over to sit on the cot beside hers. "Not here. On the Citadel."
He wasn't sure if the look she gave him was panicked or just stunned. "What?"
"We're docking right now. Terra thought you might want to see the sights while we still can."
Violet almost immediately started curling up on herself. "I…I don't know if I should…"
This he had to take action for. He had plenty of experience comforting a "fish out of water" human, after all, so he knew what to do. He drew just enough closer to place a supportive hand on her arm and ignore the way she recoiled upon first feeling his talons. "You can't stay here forever. You need to get out there, be free again, see what you haven't had the chance to before. Otherwise, you'll always be a slave hiding from the monsters."
She was ready to shut him out completely when his words got to her. That did seem to be what Terra was indirectly telling her—to put those days behind her and remember who she was, to be strong enough to defeat those particular monsters once and for all. So she hesitantly relaxed and slowly began to pull herself up. "Alright. Let's go."
He stood up, ready to lead her out. "Now you sound like the adventurous Violet she bragged about."
As she followed him, she found herself smiling. She had been brave and adventurous and confident before, perfectly happy with who she was but always curious. She did want that back. Especially if Terra missed it so much.
Violet reluctantly followed Garrus out of the ship and onto the Citadel. The station was still a bit beaten up, but the sight of it from the dock was still enough to widen her eyes with wonder. Garrus, whether from seeing some joy in her eyes or from seeing the resemblance to Terra's first sight of the station, smiled at her reaction, giving her a moment to absorb the view before starting to give her the tour. She stayed close to him, wary of every single stranger they passed even as she tried to take in all the scenery and the mixed population. It was gratifying to him to know that she felt safe around him and seemed to be calming as they made their way along. It was also comforting to know she wasn't going to run off without him and risk incurring Terra's wrath by losing her. They didn't speak much, the small conversations they did share still leaning on Terra as a go-between even when she was on the other side of the galaxy, but they seemed to be getting to know each other all the same. Violet could tell that Garrus was someone she could trust, someone who shared an incomparable bond with her sister, and Garrus could tell that Violet was just like her sister in all the ways that mattered even if it wasn't displayed in quite the same way, something he could only deeply admire. By the time they stopped at the Presidium, it was safe to say they'd accomplished what Terra had hoped they would.
Violet sighed as she looked down at the reservoir. "This was a place I always wanted to see."
"Now you have," Garrus said as he took her side, "Worth the wait?"
She shrugged. "Depends how you look at it." She glanced over to where the Cerberus attack had left smoking wreckage that C-Sec was currently attempting to fix. "…you're going to fix this?"
He nodded. "We're going to try. Everything we can."
"It's Terra. She won't give up."
He smiled. "No. She never does."
She took a moment longer to take in the view, only stopping when she noticed something. "Do you hear that?"
He listened with her, smirking when he realized what it was. "Yes, that is, in fact, an asari music store."
Violet almost immediately raced to follow the sound.
Garrus shook his head in amusement as he followed her. Most of the Presidium market stores were relegated to a counter and a purchase terminal, but since the asari took art and cultural history so seriously, this one was a dedicated shop that clearly hadn't been considered important by Cerberus and thus was relatively unharmed. Which meant that Violet was able to find a place to sit down and take in the collection and every note over the speakers as Garrus watched her. He wasn't as musically sensitive as she was, but he was fairly certain she was entirely capable of playing by ear and was even now picking apart the notes that were washing over her. It made him smile again, finally seeing the Violet that had lived on Mindoir 16 years ago.
It also gave him an idea.
Five minutes later, when he approached Violet to let her know they should be on their way, he had something for her. "I know it's not the same as having one made for you, but…"
Curious, she reached out and opened the box, gasping and, had she not been sitting down, almost collapsing at what she found inside it. First he had restored the violin she had so loved. Now he had found her a flute to replace the one she had never had the chance to receive. Without even thinking, she snapped the box closed, holding it close like a precious jewel, and hugged him.
Garrus hadn't quite been expecting that reaction. Still, at least it was a pleasant surprise. So he smirked and gingerly returned the embrace before helping her back to her feet and leading her back to the ship.
When Terra returned to the ship the next day, she entered to the cheery tune of "Sunswept" and, upon realizing it was her sister playing a flute, was utterly stunned though delighted.
Garrus, naturally, was waiting for her at the door, smiling at her reaction. "There may have been an asari music store that carried some specially crafted instruments from every species on the Citadel."
Terra laughed. "I'm glad I sent you down there with her. …this is exactly what I needed to hear."
He heard the discontent behind her words, quickly taking her side and wrapping an arm around her waist. "Are you OK?"
She shrugged. "Everything worked out alright. Aria's even living up to her word. It's just…" She sighed somberly before turning to him. "There was a turian involved. She kind of reminded me of you. …she didn't make it."
He stayed close, letting her lean into him and release the stress of a long, hard, costly fight. After a moment of strangely comforting silence, he took action. "We're going out."
She looked at him in confusion. "What?"
"You need a break while we're still on the Citadel to take one. Go change out of your armor and meet me at the docks."
She gave him a suspicious look. "What are you up to?"
He smirked as he started for the airlock. "Do you trust me or not?"
She watched him go, smiling at the prospect of time alone with him, before heading up to deck 1 to change and then down to deck 3 to briefly see Violet. Then she went through the airlock to the Citadel docks and found Garrus.
"You ready?" he asked as she approached the skycar he was standing beside. He couldn't help but smile appreciatively to see her in casual civvies that were more her typical color palette and less black.
"Ready for what?" she asked even as she climbed in with him.
"Something that doesn't involve Reapers," he answered pointedly as he closed the doors.
"Like what, a hanar poetry reading?"
He groaned. "No offense, but if the galaxy is about to end, I'm not going out on the phrase 'This one feels like a flower.'"
She immediately busted out laughing at his alarmingly accurate impression.
He smiled at the sound of her laughter before turning on the engine and starting them on their way. "No, I thought we should go somewhere we're not supposed to."
She smirked, leaning back in her seat. "Now you're talking."
So Garrus flew them up the Presidium to a walkway overlooking the lake. It was off-limits, but there was room for them to land the skycar and step out to appreciate the scenery.
The second she saw the view, Terra smiled so brightly her eyes sparkled (at least the way Garrus saw it). She had thought it would be impossible to top their visit to the edge of the reservoir, but this blew it away. They could see the entire Presidium from up here, greens and blues and echoes of light blending more perfectly than she could ever do justice to should she try to capture it. "…it's incredible."
Garrus smirked. He agreed the view was impressive, but he only had eyes for her. "I'd be lying if I said I didn't hope it would inspire a certain…mood."
She smirked with him, glancing at him from the corner of her eye. "Something on your mind?"
He hesitated, just enough for her to realize what the answer would be before he even said it. "Actually, yeah."
Now she turned to face him completely, wondering what could be bothering him.
He sighed, taking a moment to collect the words and hope they conveyed his feelings well enough. "I've been thinking about things lately. Well, not just lately, since before I went to Menae. I don't know how any of this is going to go, but I do know…I wanna do this right. Not just by my people's standards, but by yours as well."
She could understand his feelings just fine, true, but his words didn't portray his intentions. Confused, she finally outright questioned him "What exactly are you saying?"
He had spent his words. It was time for action. So he took a small box from his pocket that she instantly recognized as similar to the one her necklace had been given to her in.
And he knelt down on one knee.
Instantly realizing what was happening, she took a stunned step back, words failing her entirely as she stared at him.
He had kind of expected the reaction, so he focused on saying what he needed to say. "I'm saying I don't want to live one more day without you in my life." He opened the box to display that the contents were not a necklace but a ring, one forged of Palaven metals but encrusted with three Earth sapphires, one cut into the shape of a bird and bookended by two shaped like stars. Her necklace had been a symbol of her acceptance into his family. This ring, its twin, was a symbol of every bond they shared beyond that, including their love. "And I found a way."
She still found it hard to speak. As the weight of his actions truly settled on her, she started finding it hard to even breathe. "Garrus, I…this is…" She finally moved closer to kneel down in front of him. "You're actually…?"
"I am." He had been unshakable in the decision to make the proposal, but now that it was out there… "Did I do this wrong? This isn't something we talked about a lot before, so I had to research it to make sure and I—"
She almost laughed as she shook her head. "No. No, there is no wrong way." She took a moment to appreciate the sincerity and longing in his sapphire eyes. She couldn't imagine living without them—without him. Ever since the day they met, she had needed him. They were mated. At the thought of this final step, she didn't even ponder or consider. She smiled resolutely. "I think we both already know what I'm gonna say." She laid her hand lovingly on his scars. "I still wanna hear you ask it, though."
He smiled back, reciting the words that were tradition to her kind with more conviction than he had ever recited a pact of his own people. "Terra Luna Shepard…will you marry me?"
In her younger years, she had dreamed of hearing those words. All of those dreams paled in comparison to the moment they resounded from his voice. For the first time in far, far too long, tears of joy came over her. "Yes."
Her joyful tears were echoed in an elated hum through his sub-vocals as he pulled her closer. She kissed his scars gratefully before holding her hand out to let him, admittedly clumsily, slide the ring into place on her finger. He contemplated throwing the box over the ledge since he knew they wouldn't need it anymore, but he settled for slipping it back into his pocket and then, in one grand motion, wrapping his arms around her and springing to his feet. She actually giggled as she fell into his grasp, all her fears and worries gone for one glorious moment as she leaned back in his arms to discover the true meaning of the phrase "sweeping her off her feet." Then he leaned over and kissed her.
It was a passionate embrace straight out of a romance vid—no, it blew all those scenes away. She had her eyes closed, but she could already picture in her mind the image she would definitely be painting later. For now, though, every neuron in her body was focused entirely on his talons on her waist, his heart pounding in tune with her own, the kiss that, ironically, no human could ever compare to. When they separated, she wanted to fall back into the moment forever, the only moment in her entire life where she had known beyond a doubt she was fully and truly happy. But instead, she clung to him as he laid his head on hers and dreamed of all the other breathtaking embraces they would be sharing in the future they had now given to each other.
…the future. Terra froze as the thought came over her, one she wished wasn't so undeniable. The more she thought about it, though, the more she realized her mind was already made up on the matter. So she reluctantly spoke up. "Uh…actually…I have a condition."
Garrus gave her a look of confusion. "What do you mean?"
She sighed. "I don't want to actually have a wedding until the war's over."
The very concept seemed counter to their intentions, prompting him to give her a look of sheer incredulity. "Weren't you saying earlier that we can't let this mess dictate our lives—?"
"Please. I know it would be a nice diversion, but it would still be a diversion. We need to wait until everyone we care about can be there, until we can do this without worrying the Reapers are going to get in the way. Plus, it'll give us a reason to fight harder and make sure this ends a lot sooner. Not to mention more time to plan." She took his hand, the feeling of the ring marking their promise to each other between her finger and his talon returning a hopeful smile to her eyes. "We'll only get to do this once. I want to do it right. You deserve everything I can possibly give you."
He knew she was right, whether either of them liked it or not. He hated to postpone something this important so indefinitely, but he knew he couldn't argue with any of it. Finally, he nodded, pressing his other hand over hers. "OK. We'll wait." He scoffed. "It's not like it'd be the first time we did."
She laughed dryly, shaking her head.
He stopped her by laying his head on hers tenderly. "You're worth waiting for."
She smiled, taking comfort in the words and the embrace. Wait or no wait, this was exactly what she wanted.
"So when are we telling the crew?"
She snickered. "We should probably just announce it to the squad after we set the next course."
He shrugged. "Guess it doesn't matter when we do. They'll either figure it out for themselves or start joking about it eventually."
"Clearly."
They spent nearly an hour just sitting together and enjoying the view, free of thoughts of war or extinction as they instead leaned in closer and thought of what would come after it all. Neither of them wanted to leave, especially to go back into the thick of it, but they had to. They finally climbed back into the skycar and made their way back to the Normandy. Though Terra did still spend the whole time amorously and not-at-all-distractingly running her fingers over his arm. If Terra wasn't dying to actually spend some time with her sister, she'd be all over him in the airlock. Instead she settled for giving him one last look of adoration before making her way down to deck 3.
But when Terra walked into the med bay, she found only Dr. Chakwas reclaiming her station. "Where's Violet?"
Chakwas smiled. "Your resilient sister? She took the time to introduce herself and ensure she was entirely healthy before withdrawing into the AI core."
Terra wondered why Violet would want to be in there, but she didn't bother asking. She could see for herself. So she thanked Chakwas for the information and then crossed the med bay to the AI core. Sure enough, she opened the doors to find Violet sitting where Legion used to be posted, casting curious looks at EDI's hardware. "Vi? What are you doing in here?"
Violet shrugged. "I was just looking around. EDI and I have been talking. She's not like they say AIs are supposed to be."
Terra smirked. "No. She's special." She came over to sit down beside her. "If you want, we can go see about finding you a place to stay. There might be room in the crew quarters now that Dr. Chakwas is back in the med bay."
Violet hesitated, looking down at her feet. "Actually, I…wanted to stay here."
It took Terra a moment to realize that meant here "here." "You want to stay in the AI core?"
Violet simply nodded.
Looking around the room, Terra couldn't help but think it was exactly what her sister wouldn't want. "You don't mind it being a bit dark, lonely, and cramped?"
"If it helps," EDI stepped in, "I can adjust the lighting in this room at any time to accommodate the comfort levels of organic occupants, and I am always available to converse or to establish COMM connections between stations if Violet is in need of companionship."
"And I actually feel safer in smaller spaces," Violet added, "Especially a bit deeper in the ship. Just until I get used to the crew and everything."
It still wasn't where Terra would've suggested Violet settle in, but she could appreciate her sister's reasoning. It was quiet enough for her to play without disturbing anyone, too. It was also true that the core was one of the safest places on the ship as long as EDI was active, especially considering it was one of the few rooms on the deck that the Collectors hadn't breached when they'd boarded.
No. Wait. Probably best not to think of it like that. She didn't want to tempt fate to repeat history as long as her sister was aboard and the Reapers were out there.
Terra sighed. "Alright. We can arrange a little space for you to keep your violin and…" She looked at the space they were sitting in. It had been good enough for Legion, but it could barely be described as a bench. "…and I should probably get you a bunk." She spent all of three seconds wondering how to arrange that before a flash of inspiration struck her. She smiled, a slight spark of mischief behind it. "Give me a second. I'll bring over the bunk Garrus has in the battery."
Violet looked at her curiously. "Well, then, where will he sleep?"
Terra simply smirked to herself. "Don't worry. We'll figure something out."
Garrus wasn't in the room when she dragged out the cot. When he started preparing to turn in that night and saw his bunk was gone, he spent a moment of sheer confusion wondering what happened before asking EDI and receiving the answer to speak with Terra. Even more confused, he headed up to deck 1.
Terra preempted the question the second he opened the door. "You're moving."
"I…what?! To where?"
She smirked, stepping aside to gesture into her cabin. "In here."
This was far from what he'd been expecting. True, they had shared a bed before, but him actually staying with her was quite another thing entirely. "You…are you serious?"
"Couldn't be more. I want you with me, Garrus. Permanently."
She meant it. He could tell. And now that they were officially set to be married, he had every right to accept and no reason at all to refuse. "You don't mind?"
She hesitated to disclose her other reason for the offer. But this was Garrus. So she told him. "I need the company lately. I sleep better with you there."
He smirked. "Scare the nightmares away, do I?"
She shrugged. "Or give me something to lean on so they know not to bother." She met his eyes, her own shining with pleading and longing and 1000 other emotions no one but him would ever see. "…stay with me."
A lot had changed since the first time she asked that of him. One thing that hadn't changed was his inability to deny her. Or the fact that he would never want to. "I'll get my things and be right back."
Despite everything that was going on and all they had lost recently and all she still feared to lose, it was safe to say she had never been happier than when her mate—well, her fiancé now—came back to stay with her for good or when she ultimately fell asleep in his arms.
On Mindoir, she had never dreamed she would find everything she ever wanted in the arms of a turian. But she had. And she wouldn't have it any other way.
