On April 26, 1967, Charles is the first among our friends to turn ten years old. When his parents tell him that now that he's older, he will have more responsibilities, Charles becomes depressed at the thought of growing up. He soon begins to envy the carefree lifestyle of first-grader Didi and second-graders Stu and Betty…
Based on the "Rugrats" episode "Angelica's Birthday" and the "Recess" episode "Bonky Fever"
On April 24, two days before Chas' tenth birthday, Chas had eaten his breakfast and gotten dressed. He was standing at the bus stop, where his mother and father watched him for a moment.
"Oh, Marvin," said Shirley. "Can you believe it? Our little boy turns ten on Wednesday."
And she cried a little into Marvin's chest.
Chas noticed his mother's crying and asked, "What's the matter, mom?"
"Oh, nothing, Charles," said Shirley. "Marvin and I were just thinking about how our sweet little boy is becoming a young man."
"Well, of course, I am," Chas replied. "And pretty soon, I'll be a grown-up like you guys, and I'll get to do whatever I want!"
"Oh, that'll be the day…"
Then, Marvin said, "Of course, once you turn ten, your mother and I will be able to treat you less like a little kid and more like a grown-up. We'll trust you with more responsibilities."
"Responsibilities?" asked Chas.
"Yes, responsibilities. Growing up isn't all staying up late and watching whatever you want, slugger. You gotta take better care of yourself, like clearing your own plate from the table, picking up your own toys, or paying the mortgage. Things grown-ups do."
"That doesn't sound like much fun…"
"Maybe not, but part of growing up means doing things you're supposed to do, not just doing whatever you want. It takes a lot of hard work."
"Hard work?"
Shocked by his father's lecture, Chas entered the bus stop and seated himself in the fourth-grade area. He didn't even notice his friend Melinda getting onto the bus and seating herself next to him.
During recess that day, all of Chas' friends (Stu, Melinda, Betty, and Didi) and Drew were getting ready to celebrate the big day. By now, Didi had lost her two front teeth and also talked with a lisp.
"Can you believe it? Chas is turning the big 1-0!" said Stu.
"And he'll get lots of privileges too," said Melinda.
Betty added, "My tenth birthday is still two years away, but when I turn ten, my pop will sign me up for boxing lessons!"
Didi replied, "Ath for me, it won't be my tenth, but my twelfth birthday that will be a milethtone for me. That will be the day of my bat mithvah."
"That'll be the day, Kropotkin," said Drew. "I wonder what Finster's up to."
"I dunno," said Stu. "Let's ask him."
And as Chas passed by with a dazed look on his face, Didi said, "Hey, Charleth."
"How's it going, Chas?" asked Betty. "Ya must be gettin' pretty excited about the big day!"
But Chas wasn't excited. He realized that he wasn't ready to leave a carefree childhood just yet. So, he went to King Mark's jungle gym for advice.
"Where's Finster going?" asked Drew, this time genuinely concerned.
"I don't know," Stu replied.
Melinda noted, "Poor Charles. I don't know why he doesn't look so excited about his big day."
And Stu, Melinda, Drew, Betty, and Didi watches as Chas went to have an audience with King Mark, who by then had just turned twelve.
"Your Majesty," asked Chas, "what's it like to be old?"
King Mark replied, "Old? That's a very good question, sonny. Let's see. First, ya get a bigger appetite, and it's tough to get out of bed in the morning. Then, ya grow out of your favorite clothes, then ya get braces on your teeth and/or pimples on your face, and, well, before ya know it, you're at the opera, weeping over an unspeakable tragedy happening onstage! Hmm… opera… comin' to think of it, my coming puberty will have its perks."
"I…Is that gonna happen to me?" asked Chas in a cold sweat.
"Happens to everyone, I'm afraid, but just when it happens depends on what kind of child you are. Take my advice and enjoy the best years of your life while you can. Ha-ha, to think I was there when they first showed Ben-Hur. Didn't understand much of it, though.
"Chas Finster, you are granted permission to leave."
But as Chas climbed down King Mark's jungle gym, he looked down to see some first and second graders having nothing but fun.
Presently, the school bell rang.
"Come on, Charles," said Melinda. "Time to hit the books!"
And Chas sighed as he followed Melinda and Drew to the fourth-grade classroom.
In the classroom, during the history lesson, the teacher asked, "Which English king was said to have burned some cakes in a peasant's cottage?"
He then called upon Chas, "Charles?"
Chas replied, "Uh… Alfred the Great."
"That is correct, Charles. Now, flip over to page 109, which gives lie to the myth about Alfred and the cakes."
Chas then gave a sad sigh that concerned both Melinda and Drew.
The next day was Tuesday. Stu, Melinda, Didi, Betty, and Drew were all out on the playground, Stu and Betty making mud pies while Didi was playing with her tea set, and not far from them, Drew and Melinda were watching. Soon, they saw Chas pass by.
"Hey, Charleth," said Didi. "Got your invitation to the birthday bash after thchool to-morrow."
"Yeah," said Stu. "The first of us to reach the double digits."
"Although I won't be far behind you," snickered Drew.
Melinda then said, "I trust you and your parents will select a sophisticated yet unpretentious juice to commemorate the day."
"How am I supposed to know, if I'm soon going to be too old for silly kid stuff?" asked Chas.
His friends were surprised.
Betty said to him, "Is there anything wrong, Chazzy? Just last week, ya couldn't wait to turn ten."
Chas replied, "That was before. I have responsibilities now."
"'Sponsabilities?"
"That means once I turn ten, I won't have any fun anymore for the rest of my life."
"But, Chas, it's your birthday," said Stu.
"Yeah," said Drew. "To-morrow I have to be nice to you for a change."
"We'll give ya presents," said Betty. "And we'll see you blow out all the candles after you make your wish!"
Didi added, "You're the one who will get his firtht share of cake and ithe cream."
Chas sighed, "Look at those sweet, simple first and second graders. The only thing that would make me happy is if I was six or seven again and never got a day older, ever."
"What do you mean?" asked Melinda. "Growing up will be fun!"
"No, Melinda. I'll only be miserable when I'm all grown up."
"Wow," said Drew. "It's too bad you can't stay dumb like some first or second grader."
Chas snapped back, "Hey! They're not dumb! They're just learning!"
"Well, I didn't like 'em at the age I was supposed to, and I don't like 'em now!"
"Still, it's too bad I can't stay young like a first or second grader…"
But then, Chas got an idea.
"Wait a minute! That's it!"
Drew cried out, "You gotta be kidding me!"
And so, during recess, Chas ventured out of the fourth-grade area and went into the first- and second-grade area, where Stu, Betty, and Didi were.
"Hey, guys," said Chas to Stu, Didi, and Betty. "What'cha doin'?"
"Charleth? What are you doing here?" asked Didi.
Chas replied, "I decided that if I don't wanna grow up, I might as well grow down. Ah, first and second grade, when no one gave me any responsibilities. Those were the days…"
"Can you really do thith?" asked Didi.
"Well, if Chas can grow down, I sure hope Drew does too," said Stu.
"Yeah, if Chath and Drew became firtht or thecond graderth, they'd become one of uth."
"And if Chas is one of us," added Betty, "Drew may follow his lead, and he won't push us around anymore!"
"Or thteal our lunch money anymore!" said Didi.
"Or tickle us 'til we wet our pants!" exclaimed Stu.
Didi and Betty stared at Stu when he said that.
"Um, let's not talk about it," said Stu.
"Guys," said Chas, "it's me you have to be concerned about, not Drew."
Stu said to him, "So, let me get this straight: you're going to act just like a first or second grader?"
"Of course. How hard can it be?"
"Well, that means you gotta unlearn a lot of stuff."
"Like the times tables," said Betty.
"Or long division," added Didi. "You altho have to have a big gap where your front teeth should be, like mine."
"No problem," said Chas as he took out a black marker and used it to blacken out his buckteeth. "There. Now, I look the part. Give me any little-kid thing to do, and I'll do it!"
"Okay, Chas," said Stu. "Why don't you make a mud pie?"
Chas looked down at Stu's mud puddle and cringed. He normally didn't like getting dirty (that was Melinda's job), so he said, "Um, is it too late to back out of growing down?"
"Uh-uh-uh, no backing out now," said Stu.
"Well, okay," sighed Chas. "If I want my parents to know that I'm still too young to have responsibilities…"
And so, Chas sat down by the mud puddle and started making a mud pie. Before long, he realized that this didn't feel so bad after all.
At a distance, Drew and Melinda were watching.
"You know, Drew," said Melinda, "that looks like fun!"
"Oh, no! Not you too, Cavanaugh!" cried Drew. "It's bad enough that Finster wants to grow down, and it's bad enough that for once, I'm actually concerned about him!"
Back in the classroom, the fourth graders returned single-file, with their teacher inspecting them: "Andrew Pickles, good. Melinda Cavanaugh, very good. William Baker, good. Charles Finster…"
Upon seeing Chas with blackened buckteeth and muddied hands, the teacher exclaimed with shock and confusion, "What on earth?"
All the other kids were similarly shocked and confused.
"Have you ever seen Chas looking like that?" asked one of them.
"What's going on here?" asked another.
Chas replied (with an affected lisp), "Oh, I'm jutht fine, you guyth."
Drew then said to Chas, "Look, Finster! If you wanna say something, you gotta talk like a big boy like me, not a dumb first or second grader like Kropotkin, Giselle, or even Stu Pickles!"
"And if I do that, I'll have to take up rethponthibilitieth." Chas then asked the teacher, "May I be eckthcused?"
Drew and Melinda looked at each other and shrugged.
During lunch, Drew became appalled to see that Chas was seated, not with him, Charlotte, and Melinda, but with Stu, Didi, and Betty. Chas was even nestling himself to Stu's red blanket.
"Thanks, Stu," said Chas.
Again, Drew and Melinda looked at each other.
"What should we do with Finster?" asked Drew. "He keeps clinging onto my kid brother's blanket, he's speakin' with a fake lisp, and he's all around makin' a fool of himself! He can't do anything without kids his own age starin' at him!"
"I wouldn't worry about it, Drew," Charlotte replied. "It's just a phase."
"Charlotte's right," added Melinda. "Maybe Charles will get over it by to-morrow, when he turns ten."
Drew rolled his eyes and said, "I hope you're right."
The next day, on Wednesday, however, Drew, Melinda, and Charlotte discovered that Chas had not gotten over his no-growing-up phase. In fact, he had brought an old plush bunny along, which he, Stu, Didi, and Betty were playing with during recess.
Drew sighed, "How do you think Finster's parents will react when they see him?"
"I don't know," Melinda replied, "but we've gotta do something about it."
Meanwhile, Stu said to Chas, "I gotta admit, Chas, you're doing great so far."
Chas replied, "Thanks."
Presently, Melinda approached Chas and said, "You know, Charles. Drew, Charlotte, and I have been wondering why you've been acting so… strange."
"What do you mean?" asked Chas.
"Well, let's face the facts. To-day is your tenth birthday, but now, you've been acting like you're three, maybe four years younger, playing with plush toys and clinging onto Stu's blanket. Why is that?"
"I don't know what you mean, Melinda."
Drew spelled it out for him, "You're acting like a dumb first or second grader!"
Chas bowed his head sadly.
"And I hope you don't act like that when your parents come to pick you up."
Chas replied, "Well, my parents do have a surprise for us when they come to pick me up after school…"
"Here we are, the carnival!" exclaimed Shirley to Chas and his friends.
Yes, Marvin and Shirley had driven Chas, Melinda, Stu, Drew, Charlotte, Didi, and Betty to the amusement park. Everyone was to have a pleasant time of it. Stu and Didi went on the Ferris wheel, Drew went on the bumper cars, and Betty went on the dragon wagon, among other adventures.
But the crème de la crème of all the rides was a roller coaster that excited both Drew and Melinda.
"Whoa!" gasped Melinda. "I wanna go on this ride!"
"Me too!" cried Drew.
But, as excited as Chas was also, he stepped back.
"Come on, Finster!" said Drew. "Don't you wanna get on the roller coaster with us?"
Chas said nothing.
"Okay, then. See ya later, dumb first grader." And Drew got into the roller coaster with Melinda while Chas watched.
Poor Chas was very sad. "I wanna go on the roller coaster too."
"Uh-oh, Charleth," said Didi as she noticed the warning sign in front of the roller coaster. "Look at thith thign."
"Yeah," said Betty. "The sign says that only kids four feet and higher can get on, and that excludes us first and second graders."
"So?" asked Chas. "I'm more than four feet tall."
"But Chas," said Stu, "if you wanna be a little kid, you gotta get on only little-kid rides."
"Like the pony," said Didi.
"Or the choo-choo," added Betty.
"Or the dragon wagon," said Stu.
"If you don't wanna have any 'sponsibilities…" said Betty.
"You made your point quite vividly," said Chas.
And so, Chas went on the choo-choo with Betty. But as Chas sat on the car in front of Betty, he thought about the roller coaster and how much he wanted to ride on it.
Then, in despair, he cried out, "That's it! I can't take it anymore! Responsibilities or no responsibilities, look out, roller coaster! Here I come!"
And as soon as the choo-choo ride was over, Chas dashed from there to the roller coaster, where he saw Melinda exclaim to Drew, "Let's go on that ride again!"
"This time, with me!" cried Chas as he, Melinda, and Drew got on the roller coaster, where the three fourth graders all screamed as they rode.
At long last, Chas learned that growing up wasn't so bad after all.
The next day, during recess, Chas said to Melinda, Stu, Drew, Charlotte, Didi, and Betty, "Did you guys see how I puked my guts out after that roller coaster ride?! At least that made room for my birthday cake!"
"Did you see what my present was, Charles?" asked Melinda.
"Of course, I did," he replied. "Thank you for the nice picture you got me."
"By the way, Finster," said Drew, "there's been something Cavanaugh and I have been meaning to ask you: why were you acting like a dumb little kid yesterday?"
Chas sighed, "I don't know. I just wanted to avoid growing up because I thought it'd be all work and no play."
Melinda placed her hand on Chas' shoulder and said, "Oh, Charles. Just because we're growing up doesn't mean we should no longer have any fun."
"Yeah," said Stu. "When you're a grown-up, you get to have a house and get married and maybe even have some babies."
This was a comforting thought for Chas. "Maybe you guys are right," he said. "It'd be kinda nice to get married!" He then turned to Melinda and said, "I'll do it!"
"Great!" cried Stu. "So what do you guys wanna be when you grow up?"
"I wanna be a pro wrestler," said Betty.
"And I wanna be a CEO," said Charlotte.
"Ath for me, I'd like to be a teacher," said Didi.
"And I want to be a toymaker," said Stu. "What about you, Chas?"
Chas took a good look at Melinda and said, "You know what I think… I think that when I grow up, I wanna get married and become a father…"
And he, Melinda, Stu, Drew, Betty, Didi, and Charlotte all laughed together.
