Rey looked at her reflection in the pot and touched her short hair, letting her hand slip on the back of her head, where she massaged her scalp. Her head was hurting as usual, except this time her entire body was in pain. Her legs were shaking and her hands had been incapable of creating any shapes out of the fondant that was now starting to resemble a mass of clay in the hands of an aggressive toddler.

"I think I need to rest," she uttered barely recognizing her surroundings. Her vision was getting blurrier and the ringing in her ears was not helping her headache, nor her equilibrium. She leaned on the left, feeling the chair bump into her hip, then grabbed it quickly and sat down.

"Rest? More like an entire break."

Her heartbeat was unusually agitated, making it difficult to breathe, whereas sweat drops were running down her back and, oh, they were so cold! Her body suddenly moved on its own and shook making it seem as if she was floating. It was nice, though the movement was worsening her nausea.

The floating sensation ceased once her body touched the hard mattress. Ben lifted her head to shove a pillow under it, then sat on the bed, next to her. Rey opened her eyes, glad that the lighting in their bedroom was not bright enough to make even her eyes hurt. It was pleasantly dim, so she turned her head to the right, enjoying the soft texture and autumny scent of her pillow, as well as the beautiful face of her husband.

"Hey," she smiled weakly. However, Ben did not flinch. His face was quite revealing and she could tell that he was worried and intrigued. And ready to have none of her bullshit.

"So… do you have anything to tell me?"

Rey winced opening her eyes. Her vision cleared, meeting the annoying bright light of an early afternoon. The sky was rather dark, but the sun rays were escaping right through two clouds, announcing a lazy day in bed for everyone. She yawned rubbing her eyes, then stretched her body like a satisfied kitten. She had tilted her head abruptly when her neck cracked. She lifted her hand immediately to massage her nape as she did in her dream. She pressed her fingers gently, then her hand went up and reached the same point at the back of her head like in the dream. Were her headaches not the product of her memory loss, but maybe the cause? The only thing she knew about her physical state was that apart from the few bruises, she had no concussions that might have caused the amnesia. However, even as a poor girl with no knowledge of human anatomy and no degree in anything, she could clearly feel the weird shape of her skull. It was not a hole, but it did seem like a long scar. And if it was too old for the doctors to pay attention to it, then how come she did not remember having it before?

"Why are you awake and not in my arms?" murmured her grumpy husband pulling her closer to his body and successfully distracting her from her grim thoughts.

"It's late," she giggled as Ben's growing beard touched her skin.

"It's weekend."

He was right. After all, Ben had been working so much those past days to make up for his absence from work. Besides, it was breaking dawn when they returned home. Their old town was as covered in snow as the rest of the region, surprisingly, but they still managed to reach the old cinema. Strangely, they were not the only lost souls attending such late screenings. But just as it was the case with the train journey, the cinema had only a few clients, which made it quite intimate. Their plan was to watch at least three movies, but whereas the screening of The Man Who Laughs had enjoyed their entire attention, by the first quarter of The Phantom of the Opera , they were already falling asleep every couple of minutes. So they eventually called it a day and went back to the train station to catch the first bus taking them home and actually dropping them close by to get to their house on foot. Once arrived, Rey took of her tall boots, covered completely in snow, wet coat and hat, and looked at the guest bedroom door. She couldn't believe what a day she had. It felt like Hercules' final labour and apparently, she did win because she had her fingers around the knob when Ben cleared his throat and invited her to return by his side, in their matrimonial bed. She knew that overthinking her possibilities would cause only more drama for both of them, so she accepted his invitation on the spot, following him inside. Their clothes and hair were stinky from the cigar smoke and the mixture of scents and perfumes, but they agreed together to just undress and go to bed. Luckily for Ben, he had his pyjamas right there on the bed, but Rey was too tired and lazy to go look for hers in the guest bedroom or maybe bathroom. or even take a new pair from the dresser. So, she took advantage of her husband hiding his body while taking off his pants, and undressed completely, except for her panties. Her fifth-worst fear came true, however, because Ben cleared his throat and offered her his pyjama blouse, as it was too hot for him to wear it anyway. Rey pouted at first, but once she felt his scent impregnated in the cotton touching her skin, she thanked him and got in the bed, falling asleep on his chest. And now that tempting chest of his was seducing her into kissing it and licking it or maybe even…

"Did you just bite me?" he snarled playfully.

"Yeah, I wanted to check if this is real or one of my dreams," she licked her lips and waited for him to lean in and kiss her. Those full lips and ticklish beard…

As Ben kissed her, she took her time to explore his chest. Every now and then, she found scars, memorabilia of his rebellious and troubled college years.

Oh, how I love you…

He was so incredibly gorgeous. He had the body of a god, the best lips she could have ever kissed, the sweetest dark eyes and the cutest nose. His hair was pure silk and his voice was pure melted chocolate on her skin.

"You know… my period is already over."

Ben stopped and she could see he was hesitant once again.

"Umm… what I wanted to say is…" she bit the inside of her cheek, then shook her head. No taking backs, no apologies, no denials, no lies.

"I love you so much, Ben."

His gaze softened, putting the shield back down.

"And when you're ready and want to make love to me… I am ready. No rush, no pressure."

Ben kissed her forehead.

"Once I feel less shitty with this broken arm, I promise we'll try. But meanwhile…"

"Yes?" she looked at him all excited. According to her shattered mind, there were other ways of making love. Too bad Ben was not considering any of them.

"Do you want to take a bath together?" he bit his lip seductively.

"A bath?" she furrowed.

"Yeah, together."

Rey pursed her lips.

"But isn't the shower too… I mean there's not much space."

'Oh, trust me. There's enough space for certain activities."

Rey's eyes grew wider and she smiled flustered. She was so much braver when she was the one making advances at him, but when he was insinuating even the tiniest thing, she was so overwhelmed and aware of her size and lack of experience… at least in what concerned her overall knowledge.

"So? What do you say? The bathtub is much larger."

Why was he even asking at that point?

The master bathroom was indeed huge and it had an in-floor bathtub the size of a tiny swimming pool. Rey waited for Ben to fill it with water and put in some bath salts and oils, while she stood patiently waiting for him to finish. She took off her slippers, touching the cold marble floor with her naked feet, then once Ben pulled down his pyjama pants and got inside, she quickly took off her borrowed pyjama blouse and threw herself in, splashing the water all over and taking her husband by surprise.

"What are you doing?" he laughed.

"What? It was cold outside," she smiled playfully.

The bubbles were beginning to fill the bathtub and the lemon cupcake scent was calming and absolutely delicious. Ben dunk his head and got out all wet, splashing her this time. She giggled and let her body sink deeper.

"It's wonderful," she remarked joyfully. Ben had taken one of her feet and began massaging it. Even with only one hand, he was quite talented and knew exactly where to press. After massaging the sole, which was indeed rather tense after the previous day, his hands moved up to the ankle. He rubbed it gently, observing the scar surrounding it in a perfect circle. He looked at Rey, whose face was going from pleasure to discomfort depending on where he pressed his fingers and exhaled trying to put out the fire building inside him. He had had his anger issues back in college, but for years he had been nothing but passive and tranquil. Yet now he was fighting once again his violent urges, especially the one to run to the police station and make a huge scandal for being an institution full of incompetents.

He kissed her ankle, then playfully pulled her leg. Rey screamed panicked, before her head went underwater, then lifted her body using her elbows and spit out the water that got in her mouth.

"You jerk!" she splashed him with water.

"Want to wash my hair?" he laughed winning her heart with that gorgeous smile.

Rey looked at him and at his long dark locks, then moved closer and so did he. She found a bottle of shampoo in the basket lying on the floor and poured a large amount in her palm. She rubbed her hands together then combed his hair with her thin fingers, leaving the shampoo between the thick hair strands.

"It's not fair to have such gorgeous hair," she sighed. "At least our children might have a chance of inheriting your genes."

"Children?" he chuckled. "I don't know…"

Rey stopped from massaging his scalp and looked at him.

"Sorry… I know you've said we've never discussed this before, but maybe… in the future… you know."

"Yeah, I know," he nodded. "I'm just saying that I'd be a shitty dad. A shitty son can only be a shitty dad."

Rey pinched his nose.

"And you think I, an orphan, would be a much better mom? We'll grow up, Ben, and by the time we decide to have babies, we'll be more mature and we'll learn things together. No one is born knowing how to be a parent. I mean… I guess some things are in our blood and it is a matter of instinct."

Ben chewed on his lip.

"When… After you went missing and everyone was poisoning me with all sort of theories, I laid on the floor a couple of times and thought about this. About the family that we would never get to have anymore. We were so caught up in living the moment, that the idea of living all alone for the rest of my life, without you, was… it was so horrible. Living on my own in this empty house, where your smell was still impregnated in every single thing, I began daydreaming and imagining how our life could have been. What it would have been like having children and…"

His voice was betraying his misery, so Rey put her finger on his lips to shush him. It was high time he revealed his true feelings and thoughts, but his words were hurting her deeply, even if it was not neither fault. So she did her best to look fine and put on a brave face. And even if she didn't remember it yet, she knew that was pretty experienced when it came to dissimulating.

"I'm here now," she said and took the showerhead to rinse his hair.

Ben smiled with sadness and let his gaze fall on his wife's breasts. They were so pretty and tempting. He bit his lip and clenched his fist around the sponge, gladly for once that his other hand was immobilized. They were also so… He furrowed. They were indeed bigger. Much bigger. And even though it wouldn't have been proper for him to suddenly touch her like that, just by looking at them, he could tell that they were still natural. And those stretch marks…

"Do you have a tattoo ?"

Ben flinched startled at Rey's high pitched voice and surprised face. Tattoo ?

"Oh yeah," he chuckled lifting his hair and tilting his head, revealing his tattoo.

Rey squinted her eyes.

"It's a cross?"

"No, it's a lightsaber."

"Oh!" exclaimed Rey noticing the resemblance between his tattoo and the clock hand she saw in her old cafe.

"You also have one. They're matching tattoos."

"Really?" she smiled and lifted her hair, but judging after the location of Ben's tattoo, she realised that she couldn't see hers without a mirror. However, Ben leaned in and checked her neck. It was a good thing that his face was already serious because only the shock kept him from an ugly grimace.

"What's wrong? Has mine lost its colour?" she joked innocently. But Ben could not share her goodwill. The white burn scar on her neck that was now replacing her blue lightsaber tattoo was too much to digest. He let go of the shower gel bottle and put his large hand on her head, pulling her closer at his chest. Her breasts were tickling his skin and he could feel her hand on his thigh, so close to his…

"What's wrong with your head?" it was his time to ask.

"Amnesia?" she snorted.

"No!" He massaged her head under the heavy layers of wet hair. "What's this?"

Her hair was much shorter there, but it was not the size that was bothering him. It was the long deep scar. Before she got to open her mouth, he turned her around and parted her hair. Oh, dear… it was indeed a very ugly scar.

"Oh, about that…" she finally spoke. "I actually wanted to ask you if you know what happened. I don't remember having it before and I've only noticed it this morning. I had a dream… a memory I think and my head was hurting right there and then I woke up and found this."

She spoke so quickly that Ben barely managed to understand her words. He was too shocked by the discovery of the long curved scar.

"You didn't have this before," he told her all serious. "However, you did have a tattoo, which is now gone."

Rey furrowed and without even minding her own naked body, she got out of the bathtub and looked in the mirror. She had felt the scar, but the tattoo was intriguing her. And now, she was even more intrigued by the white burn scar.

"What happened to me?" she uttered feeling the panic building inside her. She turned to face her husband for comfort and answers, but his gaze was not meeting hers. Instead, he was observing the deep stretch marks on her hips and belly. How could he give her even the most ridiculous calming answer when he was asking himself the same thing.

"Come," he managed to say, inviting her back in the bathtub. She let out a sob, then stepped inside, and put her arms around his waist. Ben caressed her head and inhaled deeply. Their quiet day together was over.

"I'm sorry for ruining everything," she sniffed cuddling at his chest. The water was getting cold, the bubbles were pretty much gone and even Ben's hair was almost completely dry, except for his tips. Their honeymoon at home was ruined and so was their mood.

"It's ok," he murmured kissing her forehead as she whimpered. She wanted to ask him to fill the bathtub with hot water again, but her fingers had now an unpleasant texture, meaning that she should no longer mop around in there.

"How about we rinse our bodies and get the hell out of here to grab a bite and mind our current lives?"

Rey lifted her head being immediately surprised with a sweet kiss on the lips. He was so wonderful…

She got up and let Ben wash off the lather, then cover her with a huge white towel, before giving her a bathrobe. As she was making a turban out of the towel, she peaked at Ben's body. Had she not been so upset, he wouldn't have gone away with depriving her of enjoying that dessert. He could hide how much he wanted, but even the mere sight of his back and butt was making her knees weak.

"You seem better," he remarked tying his bathrobe. She was sure the jerk was well-aware of his effect on her.

"Yeah," she exhaled flustered. "I guess it was the shock of being exposed to so much information so sudden. I panicked."

"We should go to the hospital on Monday and ask for your file," he suggested brushing his hair. Rey looked at the wet tips of his hair, then approached him and snatched his brush, beginning to clumsily brush his hair.

"Ben, were there any pieces of evidence? I can't remember if you've already told me."

"No evidence," he purred making her snort. "I mean… except for your red scarf. It had blood on it and it was found hanging in a tree by the lake. Your phone, computer and everything else were clean. Work, work and work."

"So everyone presumed I've run away with someone else or died by your hand or by drowning just… because?"

"The press and social media are trash. People are trash."

Press? Social media? How come she had never considered looking herself up online?

"Can I get a computer?" she asked cautiously, expecting a blatant refusal.

"You can use my tablet if you want. It's connected to the cloud, so you can access your email address and get familiar to your former life as a famous chef."

"I was not famous," she snorted. Or was she? She exhaled frustrated. "Geez, I swear I sometimes can't wait to for all of this to be over and just be… happy."

"We can still be happy," he purred again. "Contrary to my overall grumpiness and our arguments, I have been happy ever since I saw you in that ambulance."

"You were fucking miserable just a couple of days ago, you grumpy old man," she rolled her eyes then made an embarrassed grimace. Maz would have been so disappointed in her and her foul language. But Ben was not Maz, so he turned around and pushed her to the wall with his huge body. He grinned playfully, making her giggle.

"You are so lucky I have a broken arm," he said kissing her on the lips after each word. "I could still punish you though."

"Really?" she bit her lip. "I might like whatever you have in store for me."

"I know," he purred one last time before Rey grabbed his head and pulled him into a hasty yet passionate kiss.

"Can… can you go downstairs and make something good to eat?" he asked breathlessly, licking his lips. "I'll follow you in a few minutes."

"Is everything ok?" she panted. "Have I done anything wrong?"

"Nothing. You're perfect."

She looked him in the eye seeing nothing but pure adoration.

"Fine," she nodded, before pressing her lips against his one last time.

As she went downstairs, she felt as if she was floating. Everything was finally fine. No more misunderstandings, no more jealousy, no more third parties involved in their life as a couple. No more problems. Except for her missing three years. But she was not going to ruin her day once more by thinking about such a thing. So, she entered the kitchen and started putting back the bags of flour and sugar, the canned fruit, the fresh fruit, vegetables, the bowls and utensils.

Now it's perfect, she thought admiring her shiny counters as she walked to the fridge. She took out some leftovers and a carton of milk, then put the leftovers in the microwave oven and the milk in a pot on the stove. She then went back to one of the cupboards and took out a bar of chocolate. She chopped it, then added a spoon of sugar in the milk and stirred. In another pot, she added the chopped chocolate and two spoons of milk until it melted. She poured the rest of the milk and stirred one more time until the colour became a soft brown. Satisfied with the results, she prepared two mugs, in which she poured the hot chocolate milk, and then a plate full of homemade cookies, and two others with leftovers.

She looked at the staircase, wondering what took Ben so long, then back at the counter. Eating at the kitchen table did not seem too tempting. Perhaps there were other options, more romantic or at least more interesting and cosy? The living room seemed cosy enough, but even after concluding that Kaydel was not trying to steal her husband, she still could not stay there without seeing them chatting and laughing. She crossed the living room and reached the other door leading to the greenhouse turned terrace. The door opened with a long creaking noise and she stepped inside. Good thing she had her slipper on, as it was rather cold in there. A piece of glass was shattered on the floor and through the hole, some birds had made their way in, as well as snow. Rey hit the light switch with the back of her palm, but the lights remained off. It seemed that the lightbulb was shattered into pieces as well. Maybe a candle would do? She ran to the pantry, where she found only some birthday candles. She took them all and shoved them in the soil of a potted plant, then lit them. They were not making much of a difference, but it was enough to see the food. Now where to sit… She pulled two chairs and covered them with two blankets she had found in a box in the pantry as well. For the food, she considered waiting for Ben, but with his broken arm, he wouldn't have been of much help anyway, so she had the privilege of arranging everything on her own. It did not look exactly romantic, but it was cute.

"Rey?" she heard her name.

"Over here!"

Moments later, Ben stopped at the door, wearing a pair of black pants, a scarlet red long-sleeved T-shirt and slippers. His hair was dry and he looked far more presentable than she did. Rey sat on the chair and pulled the blanket over her shoulders. Whereas it was chilly, the bathrobe was keeping her warm enough. However, she was not exactly presentable.

"You did all of these?" said Ben visibly surprised and touched.

"No," she rolled her eyes. "I called an entire army to help me. I was really wondering what took you so long," she pointed at his comfortable clothes.

Ben touched his hair, still warm from the blow dryer, then sat down.

"I texted Luke. Perhaps he can help us."

"Yeah…" she pouted no longer interested in that conversation. "So what's the deal with this place?" she diverted. "It's a mess."

Ben took a bite out of a shrimp and looked around.

"I've pretty much abandoned it," he admitted. "We used to take care of the plants together - we even grew a couple of vegetables and had some trees. I had to sell the jacuzzi, though. And…"

"And?" watched him Rey absorbed by each word he spoke and shade on his face.

"Well… I…" he sighed. "When the accusations were made, some stupid kids began throwing rocks and breaking the stained glass. I replaced it with something darker to avoid being spied on. Not that I ever stepped foot inside here anymore."

"Ben," she said putting down her fork and grabbing her cup of chocolate milk. "After yesterday, I have decided to go back to work. I will help Rose and make money to pay off whatever debts you might have and to keep this house. And I want to repair this greenhouse or whatever it is. If we can really not make it, then I will give you my signature and we can move somewhere else eventually. As long as we're together, I am happy. You make me happy."

The soft sigh made her relax. Ben wiped the corner of his mouth with a napkin, then took her hand, caressing it with his gentle fingers. Her heart seemed to stop for a moment. Was he finally going to say those three words? The only time she heard him say them, his voice lacked any emotion and pretty much so did his heart. It sounded more like an excuse to keep himself from throwing her out or strangling her. But now… oh, how she needed to hear those words!

"What's this?"

Oh… her enthusiasm perished. She pulled her hand and then took the ring off her thumb. She had been wearing it ever since she'd found it on the floor. How come he didn't notice it until now?

"I think it's yours?" she said taking his head and dropping it in his palm. Ben analyzed its texture with his fingers, then laughed.

"I thought I'd lost it after I returned from the hospital. I've been looking for it like mad."

So that explained the disaster in the master bedroom. But why was he so desperate? It was just a ring. Unless…

"Is that your wedding ring?"

Ben lifted his head to look at her.

"Thank you."

Rey nodded. She was happy for Ben, but now her finger was uncomfortably naked. Not her thumb, ironically, but the index. The one where she knew her own engagement and wedding rings were supposed to be. They finished eating their meals and drinking their chocolate milk. As the evening was turning into nighttime, the place was getting colder and darker, not to mention eerier. Ben helped her clean up, looking at her serious face from time to time. She was wiping her wet hands when he stood in front of her with the intention of making her talk. But Rey's big eyes stared at him with innocence, before she ran to the place where he was keeping his money for the weekly expenses. She took out the notebook, then checked her coat pocket.

"As I promised," she said putting back the money she had taken. "Every bill is back to its place and I have some for Rose and then enough for… I don't know. What am I supposed to do with them?"

She turned around to talk face to face, but he didn't seem to care about the money.

"Keep it for your other expenses, if you want to work again."

"Oh yeah," she smiled. "It's like an investment. Ok then."

She put the money in the back of the notebook, making a mental note to look for a bag and a wallet in the closet. She also needed papers. Her ID… where were her things? And the car key. She had a car according to Ben.

"What's going through your mind?" he approached her.

She shook her head.

"Nothing and everything."

She looked at her feet, then out of the window. It was already so dark. Time was passing so quickly and that day ended up being even more overwhelming than the previous one. She also needed to write everything in her diary.

"What now?" she heard herself say without even acknowledging the moment she had thought of that question.

"Do you want to watch a movie?"

"Sure," she smiled without much enthusiasm.

Ben noticed the dark cloud making his beautiful wife sad. So he did the only thing he could. He grabbed her by the bathrobe, pulling her closer, and kissed her. Rey stared at him surprised, but not as surprised as she ended once he finally uttered:

"I love you, Rey. I love you the most."

She bit her lip feeling the tears filling her eyes. He meant it. He was indeed honest and nothing could change her mind regarding his feelings.

"Now let's go upstairs."