A Dead Man Is a Dead Man

Finally Sarevok woke up. It was dark already, and the ground started to get cold. His soul was completely empty, his eyes hollow and swollen. He felt as if all the strength he ever had was gone. But Peri was still there, holding him, not going anywhere. Sarevok reached for her hand and squeezed it almost violently.

- "Woke up, bro? Good... it IS starting to get cold here."

- "Little Cespenar here too! Is all worriedworried about sadsadsad Sarevok!"

Sarevok pulled Cespenar next to his chest and scratched the imp behind his ear.

- "Sister. I don't think I can manage if anyone talks to me at all. I do not know what to say. I do not want to face people."

- "They were arranging some sort of party for you," Peri said.

Sarevok groaned.

- "Cesp? You could make us invisible, couldn't you?" Peri asked, and the imp nodded profusely, happy to be able to help.

- "Look, Sar. We go back to the Vagabond, invisible. It is all right," she continued, talking in a calm and carefree tone. She could physically feel Sarevok's anguish.

- "Mother is there," Sarevok moaned. "She... "

- "What has gotten into you?" Peri said, incredulous. "You have regressed somehow. You should know by now that she loves you no matter what you do, and now you have done something good in spite of how you feel about it."

- "They... what will they say?"

- "Nothing at all, if I ask them not to. They love you. They are worried about you. Now, come on."

- "Me'se shine the armor and sword, yes?" Cespenar said.

- "You do that, once we are back at the Vagabond," Peri said. She stuffed Sarevok's gear into his Bag of Holding. Sarevok was squeezing the non-magical backpack containing Tamoko's urn and daisho, his knuckles shining white through the dried blood.

Peri took hold of Sarevok's arm and Cespenar made them invisible.

The horse Sarevok had borrowed had been taken back to the city guard stables. So the sister and the brother walked, quietly, feeling each other near. Peri found herself thinking about Gorion. But one slip of the hand, and they would have grown up together, chasing each other at the lush yard of Candlekeep, climbing the trees, seeking shells from the seashore, battling imaginary dragons with wooden swords. But as it was not to be, they had to settle for real ones after a lot of pain and animosity. Peri's heart ached after that parallel reality. She could see little Sarevok, the happy, trusting child he never had been, running to Gorion who tousled his hair and hugged him, like he always did to his daughters. She reached for Gorion's amulet inside her shirt and held it for a moment. Some of her father's essence was in the pulsing, warm stone. She sighed. At least she had her brother now.

As they entered the deck of the Vagabond, they triggered the magical ward Winski and Jelena had construed. Winski, standing guard, immediately was ready to launch his spells but soon noticed that it was just his son and Peri.

- "Oh, it's you two. I suppose it didn't occur to you that there might be some people worried sick? Of course, we are completely overprotective - we have just heard that our son has slaughtered an invading army, and then his sister goes looking for him, certain that he is not in good shape. And then both of you are missing for hours! One hour more and I would have started scrying for you! Thoughtless brats!" Winski was as shaken as he was angry.

- "Peri... you said that they wouldn't speak to me," Sarevok said, looking very drained.

- "Right. Winski, don't cluck like an indignant hen. It doesn't suit you. Sarevok is not in shape for lectures now. If you feel the need, I can take the flak, but he needs rest and love now."

Winski took a closer look at his son and nodded. He embraced Sarevok, who listlessly returned the gesture.

- "Why do you think I am so mad?" Winski murmured. "I won't lose you ever again."

The three descended the deck and met the relieved others. Jelena also came to hug Sarevok.

- "Little son, golden-eyed child... believe mother. You did a good thing. If you didn't fight the army, many a baby would be without their mothers now."

- "I think I know... believe," Sarevok said quietly, face downcast. "It is just hard to accept, anyway. I mean, I stood there, at the field of battle. I was the one awash with blood. I am the one who saw how little difference there is between being a hero or a fiend."

- "But you defended innocent people," Imoen said. "Those orcs were about to kill and rape them. They hardly were innocent."

But Sarevok just shrugged.

- "A dead man is a dead man, little sister. Dead by my blade. I wish we could leave Suzail soon. My soul aches."

- "As soon as we figure out what to do about the child abusers," Peri promised.

- "Now I must say that this was an even more spectacular way to ruin the 'discreet' part than what I would have expected," Winski chuckled. The others sniggered too, their tension relieving. Even Sarevok smiled a little.

- "I know what will make us all feel better," Jelena said. "An old-fashioned pot of hot tea!"

And she disappeared to make the tea, Cespenar fussing after her.