-Chapter 10-

Hope

Meanwhile, back in Dunhurst, the real Edward was back at it with his training. It was eerily similar to Roy's nightmare. Except, that instead of a dead squirrel on the floor in front of him, it was a dead hare he was tasked to resurrect. This made him very uneasy. This felt no different than when he and Alphonse had tried to revive their mother all those years ago. The last thing he wanted or needed was to go back to the Gate and encounter Truth.

Obliterating that wretched being was something Edward had often thought about. Whatever the hell that thing was had already taken so much from him and the ones he loves already: his arm, his leg, Al's whole body. Roy Mustang wasn't going to be added to that list.

No way in hell.

Before he began on his task, he felt himself hedge. "Lee?" He asked as he sat on the floor, looking at the hare. "Can I ask you something? How is this any different than human transmutation? I mean, it's basically the same thing, except with an animal isn't it?"

Lee folded his arms. "Not exactly, son." He replied, shaking his head a little. "It's more like you're curing what had killed it in the first place. Think of it as you're correcting an error. For example, if you were writing something down with a pencil and made a mistake—you erase it and write the correct word. This is the same thing when you get right down to it. It isn't equivalent exchange because you aren't taking anything. You're making things the way they should be."

"I see what you mean." Ed answered, still trying to wrap his head around all this. "It makes sense, I guess."

"You can do this, Edward. I have the utmost faith in you. Just breathe and concentrate." Lee told him.

Edward nodded and took a few deep breaths before he began. He clapped his hands together and thought about something that made him feel tranquil—Roy Mustang being cured and spending his life with him and Al.

With that, he pressed his hands down on the animal and waves of green energy surged around it. For a few seconds, Edward seemed to be doing just fine and Lee observed closely. A little while later though, his brow began to ruffle and hands started to shake. He was pushing himself to hard again and Lee knew it. The boy was using up all his energy and it was causing him pain.

"Edward, stop." Lee said firmly, walking closer to him.

But Edward decided to ignore him and not break his focus. His entire body ached, and he longer he kept this up and the harder he tried, the worse it got. He couldn't stop now! He couldn't give up!

When the doctor realized he was being ignored, he took Ed by the shoulder. "I said stop now!"

Edward continued through his strain. "But...I've almost...got it. Just a few more seconds!"

The next thing he knew, he was being yanked back by Lee and his green sparking alchemy crackling out, and the hare was still dead.

Ed growled, turning to Lee. "What the hell did you do that for!?" He shouted. "I told you I almost-"

Ed's words were cut off. He heaved forward and vomited forcefully into the nearby trash bin. He could feel Lee rubbing circles on his back to try and soothe him.

"That's why, Edward." Lee answered in a sad voice, holing the boy's ponytail back with his other hand. "How many times do we need to go over this? You're pushing yourself way too far. If you keep this up, it's only going to set you back more, that is if it doesn't kill you first."

Ed whimpered sadly and wiped his mouth with his sleeve. "I know." He said, the tone of his voice showing that he knew the doctor was right. This was getting to be too much and he wasn't sure his body could take much more. "I'm just...running out of time."

Lee sighed and patted the kid again. "What would Mustang say if he knew you were doing this to yourself for his sake? Do you think he would approve?"

Ed sighed sharply. "No...he wou-" He started again, just to throw up again. Grabbing the edge of the bin, he panted heavily, he wasn't sure if he was going to retch again or not. "He would tell me I was being an idiot." He admitted.

Lee scooted around the boy a little bit so he could see his face a bit more. "Listen to me, you can pull this off, I know you can pull this off. But, as a father myself, I can say without a doubt that no parent would want their kid to hurt themselves to benefit them. When I lost my son...well, lets just say I wouldn't wish that overwhelming and endless pain on anyone. I'm asking you as a dad, please don't make Mustang experience what I have." The kindhearted doctor's voice began to waver a little bit. The death of his son still plaguing him as if it happened just yesterday.

Edward found himself just being silent. Deep down, he knew that Lee was right. Roy had made it clear since the moment Ed was shot with a Philosopher's Stone months ago that keeping his major safe was his top priority. Even more so after all they had endured after that. Roy was adamant to keep the boy safe and he knew that, as much as he didn't want his Colonel fussing over him. Look what he had put himself through just to make sure he was safe. He performed the ultimate taboo to keep him alive—something Roy would have never done in a million years. Edward and Alphonse didn't really remember what having a parent was like, so they didn't comprehend how strong their love could be. Ed wasn't used to love like that. Edward had taken the helm as a parent as far as Al was concerned, but being taken care of himself?

It was all so foreign to him.

The Fullmetal Alchemist wasn't able to make eye contact with the doctor. "I can't lose anyone else, Lee." He said softly. "I just can't." It was as if even speaking the words caused him pain.

"I know, son." Lee answered. He knew what the boy meant. "But you have to remember that there are people out there who can't bare to lose you."

Edward had never thought of it that way.

Lee patted Edward on the back one last time and stood, helping the kid stand. "I want you to go for a walk and clear your head, okay?" Ed didn't verbally answer, he just stood up with Lee and nodded. "Just for an hour." Lee went on. "Now go splash some water on your face and head out, alright?"

"Okay." Edward said with a heavy sigh. Maybe he did need some alone time to get his thoughts together.

A little while later, Edward finally began his walk. His legs still felt a little wobbly, but it seemed the more he moved around, the better he felt. Besides, Dunhurst was a beautiful woodland town, with deep forests scattered about. The twilight of the day made it all the more serene out there. Relaxing was a little easier this way, so he decided to turn his walk into more of a small hike.

Edward had always liked the solitude of the woods. The silence made it easier to clear his mind. Finding his center was crucial to him succeeding in his mission to save Roy. Medicinal alchemy was getting easier to master, and he was getting stronger every day he trained. Besides, he wasn't going to let his father down all because he wasn't able to get control of his nerves.

The sunlight beamed beautifully atop the canopy of trees above him. The air had a slight chill to it still, but it felt perfect. Wind blowing softly enough so he didn't get overheated on his hike. It was coming on Summer and some flowers were beginning to poke out again from the soil, and birds flew and sang throughout the forest.

It was so peaceful and really...pretty.

Up a way ahead of him, he heard something odd. It was a weird kind of whining. Looking around he brought his walking pace up to a jog to follow the sound. Whatever was making these noises sounded distressed. When he made it to the source of the noise, he could see a small German Shepard puppy, mostly hidden behind a bush. When he pulled the brush back, he saw that the poor thing had been caught in a bear trap of sorts.

Edward gasped and made his way closer, the puppy was struggling to free itself.

"Just hang on, little guy." Edward said to the dog. "I'll get you out of there, okay?" He brought his hands down onto the trap and used his alchemy to shatter it to pieces, making sure no other creature would suffer from it's grip. "Stupid damn poachers!" He cursed. "Why can't they just leave innocent creatures alone? It makes me sick."

Once the puppy was freed, it only made about two steps before it fell over dead.

Putting a hand over his mouth in horror, Edward scooped the puppy into his hands. He felt terrible for a while until a thought hit him—he would attempted to bring him back to life with this medical alchemy! No one was around either, so no one would be able to stop him.

He placed the animal gently down on the forest floor, then closed his eyes and tried his best to focus.

You can save this little guy, Edward. You can fix what it broken.

Edward placed his hands on the puppy and made his energy and alchemy flow into it. Given how weak he already was, however, it didn't take long for his energy to wane. But he didn't care, he pressed on, not letting the pain distract him. He was able to do this. If anything, the pain and pressure only pushed him farther.

"Come on, little guy." Edward said. "You can't let your life end before it's really began." He fought to stay composed, but when he still didn't see any response, his confidence began to waver. "Please...please..." He cried out. With a loud scream of effort, he gave it everything he had. The light inevitably died out and Ed collapsed hard onto the grass, not even able to use his hands to catch himself. Rolling onto his back, he looked over at the creature.

No response.

Edward couldn't help it anymore. Bringing his hands to cover his face, he wept. He cried for that sweet, innocent puppy, he cried because he knew saving his dad was hopeless. The only other time he remembered sobbing like this was the say he tried to resurrect his mother and lost everything.

The next thing Edward felt was something lightly tapping the side of his cheek. After a few shuddering breaths and wiping a few tears away, he looked to see what it was. When he opened his eyes and looked over, he grew silent and his eyes widened.

It was the German Shepard puppy—alive and healthy as ever.

Was he hallucinating? His mouth went agape and he blinked a few times to make sure it wasn't an illusion. After rubbing his eyes for a while, he reopened them and the pup was still there, wagging it's tiny tail back and forth happily.

More tears fell from Edward's eyes, but this time, they were tears of utter relief and euphoria. He reached over and took the puppy into his arms and hugged it tight, even giving it a small kiss on top of it's head. The puppy licked his face again, and the tickling sensation and the joy he was feeling made him laugh through his tears.

This was the first time since that moment in the cave all those months ago, that he felt there was a light at the end of the tunnel. That there was hope. Edward hugged the puppy again and pet the top of it's tiny head.

There was no way in hell he was going to leave this little guy. For all he knew there were more traps scattered about all over the place. Even so, the dog didn't have a collar or a tag, so he figured it had to be a stray.

Looking at the little thing, Ed spoke. "How would you like to come with me, little guy?"

The puppy was still shaking his tail and let out a loud bark. This got Edward to smile widely. "I'll take that as a yes." He laughed. "But you're going to need a name." So he took a moment to think of one, all the while scratching his new friend behind his ear. The dog closed its eyes, clearly relaxed by his touch.

Looking back to the puppy, the perfect name came to his mind—and it was absolutely perfect.

"Hope." He said simply, the dog cocking its head to the side and looking cheerful and another sweet bark came from him. Edward grinned, "Hope it is then." After a moment, he fell silent again and just took a moment to nuzzle Hope. "Thank you." He said in a very low whisper. Once he was done, he perked back up. "Okay, Hope! Let's go meet Alphonse ad Doctor Lee. Something tells me they are going to be as happy to meet you as I am." He said. "And then you're gonna meet my dad."

This was enough for Edward to finally feel like everything was going to be okay. And why wouldn't it be? He had saved Hope, and he was going to save Roy too. Nothing was going to stop him. He was going to do this, and why wouldn't he? After all...

He had Hope.

XXXX

Fuhrer Mustang was making his way through the walls of Central with a sense of purpose. The destination was General Armstrong's office. Normally he, and the rest of Central, tended to avoid disturbing the her whenever possible, but not today.

Today was different—it was special.

There was something that had been weighing on Roy's head since Armstrong had opened up to him. Although he had kept it fair by letting her in on his role in Bradley's death and what was going on with his health, he still felt like something was missing. It felt as if she had given up a lot more information than he had.

Deep down, Roy knew that on some level Armstrong was aware all along that he was sick, so he didn't really feel it was much to let her know that her instincts, as usual, were correct. Even with him confessing to murdering her ex, he still felt like things were left uneven.

Which he intended to remedy.

Once he had made it to her office door, he froze for a moment—the tickle in his throat was back. Coughing hard a few times seemed to make him feel back to normal, but the coughing made his chest ache and when he looked at his hand again, it was covered in blood. Just as it did when Alphonse was visiting.

But that was something he didn't let the boy in on.

Taking a handkerchief from his shirt pocket, he wiped his mouth and his hands off, hiding the crimson that was there before. This was something he couldn't deal with right now.

So he didn't.

Despite his brief coughing jag, he collected himself and knocked on the General's door confidently.

"What?" Roy heard her voice say from behind the door. When he opened it, he saw that she was busy working on paperwork of her own. Files and reports scattered about on her desk. Hearing him enter, Armstrong didn't even look up from her work. "What do you want, Mustang?" She asked, already annoyed.

How she even knew it was him without him speaking or her looking up, Roy would never know. That was just...General Armstrong.

A smile somehow found it's way to Roy's face. "I take it your busy?" He joked.

Still not looking up, she barely regarded him. "I'll ask you again, what do you want, Mustang? I have a lot of work to do."

Roy still had a smile on his face and nodded. "I need your assistance with something."

Armstrong sighed heavily and finally stopped and looked at Roy. "Really? Right now?" She asked, grabbing a file and rising from her desk to her file cabinet. "Can't you get your lieutenant to help you? Seems she's looking for any reason to be in the same room with you these days."

"Hawkeye can't help me with this." Roy said. "Just you."

"Come back later."

Roy walked closer to her and took the file from her and put it in the cabinet. "Please, General." He said. "Please just do this for me—your dying superior."

The General shot him a serious glance. "That's not funny."

"You know..." He went on in a playful tone, ignoring her last remark. "I could just order you to come with me. Problem solved, right?" Roy then gave her a kind look. "Just for an hour." He said, walking towards the door. "Come with me." Roy didn't even give her a chance to retort, he was already out in the hallway.

Armstrong rolled her eyes and slammed her file cabinet closed a little and then made her way out the door behind her superior.

XXXXX

Inside the car, it was mostly silent. The only noise was that coming from the radio, a faint classical number that Roy would have sworn he knew the name of. In the passenger's seat beside him, Armstrong just glared out the window. It was clear she was still pissed about being interrupted from her work, and by him no less.

"Oh, cheer up, General." Roy said to her. "You don't even know where we're going. No need to look so...stern." He said. "I think you may like it."

"I'd like to be back in my office finishing the work I was dragged away from." She answered, still staring out the car window. "Not running around and playing with you."

Roy shook his head, but in an endearing way. There really was no one else like Olivier Armstrong. "You trust me, right?" he asked.

Armstrong sighed. "Yes."

Roy knew that she trusted him, but he just wanted to hear her say it again. He knew what the real reason for Armstrong's extra icy demeanor was. She had made herself vulnerable to him when she had told him about Belle. And as much as it may have helped Armstrong to finally get that off of her chest, the fact remained that she still showed weakness. Did she regret telling him?

Even though he would never tell anyone what happened to her and Belle, he wouldn't blame her if she did. Roy was far from the type of person that was open about his feeling, seemed to always get him into trouble. Look where he was with Riza because he let her know how he felt.

"Listen," Roy said, his voice becoming more serious and less playful than it was a second ago, "if you just want me to forget everything that you told me before...consider it forgotten." He told her. "I don't want you to feel uncomfortable around me now."

"I don't." She said suddenly, surprising even Roy. "I just was holding onto that alone for so many years. I just hope Belle wouldn't think that I had just...forgotten about her or anything." Her voice was far softer than it had been since he'd seen her. Softer but...sad. "I just don't enjoy...sharing my weaknesses with people."

Roy looked over at her briefly before returning his eyes to the road. "You're not weak, General." He told her. "No question that you're one of the strongest people in Central, but you are still...human."

"Even so." She replied. "I'm not the same person I was back then. I've done a lot of growing up and getting smarter. It's nice to feel I have some sense of closure regarding my daughter, but I can't help but feel guilty I suppose. I don't want her to think I wont care about her anymore. But..." She trailed off. "I'm really glad I told you."

Roy felt himself smiling again, soft and warmly. "Me too." He replied. "Listen...when you came to visit me when I was in the hospital, you saw me at my lowest. I couldn't even manage to get a drink of water without your help." He paused for a moment before he went on. "Having feelings about someone you love or...being sick with a terminal illness...doesn't make you weak. It's how we handle it." He looked over to her again. "You're stronger than you think."

Armstrong nodded slightly. "So are you."

"I'm honored you told me about Belle, General." He told her with the utmost sincerity. "Thank you."

Armstrong just waved a hand. "I was just keeping up my end of the deal. You held your end. So don't mention it."

Finally, the car hand made it to it's destination. As Roy turned in to park, Armstrong looked around in confusion. "The cemetery?" She asked, both she and Roy exiting the car. "What are we doing here?"

Roy looked over at her, sliding dark shades over his eyes. "I wanna visit Maes for a minute, then you and I will go where we need to go, okay?"

Far be it from Armstrong to tell someone they couldn't respect a fallen comrade, so reluctant as she was, she went along with it...

Once Roy had made it to his best friend's headstone, he stood there silently, speaking wholly from his heart. No one in the world knew him like Maes did, so whatever was in his heart that he wanted to say...

Maes knew. He just did.

The more time he spent with his friend, the more glad he was that he had brought his sunglasses. He always seemed to swirl with emotion whenever he came here, and although he had just discussed not being weak to Armstrong...he just couldn't handle if she saw him cry like Riza had. And today wasn't about him anyways.

After a few minutes, both Roy and the General saluted the grave of Maes Hughes and made their way back to their task.

Eventually, Roy had led the General to an open area of the cemetery. A large tree was the only thing to be seen for a ways aside from the grass and the fast setting sun. The air and the open space...the silence...just made things seem so...serene. As pretty as it was, Armstrong had no idea why he had stopped here of all places.

As if he could sense her skepticism, he spoke. "I want to show you something." He said to her. "I'm not quite sure how you're going to react to this, but only one way to find out, right? It's just...something I felt needed to be addressed."

Armstrong narrowed her eyes at his words. "How I'll react...to what?" She asked hesitantly.

Roy just let out a shaky breath, looking at her with a mixture of kindness and nerves. Taking a step to the side, behind where he was, there was a small gravestone. That read:

Belle – the light of life left you far too soon. I'll always be by your side.

Love, Mom.

As her eyes scanned the words on the stone, Armstrong's face remained unchanged. As if she was trying to burn each and every word into her head. Roy didn't know if this was good or bad, but he decided he would just let her have a moment before he asked, refraining from speaking.

Armstrong approached the grave slowly. She got onto her knees to be on level with the grave. She ran her fingers gently over the word Belle.

Roy walked closer to her, still staying a little ways behind her. "I figured you just needed a place where you could just sit and talk to her." He finally spoke. "No one knows this is here—just us so you can come here whenever you like without worry."

Still entranced by the stone, Armstrong tried to find the right words to speak. "This is just so..." She began, shaking her head slightly. "Why would you do this for me?"

Roy just gave her a puzzled look. Did she really think that he had some sort of ulterior motive or something? Had no one ever really done anything for her just because they could? No strings attached?

Roy just knelt beside her. "Because you're a mother, and she's your daughter." He told her simply, placing a hand on her shoulder. "You never had anywhere you could grieve over your loss, General. Maybe this will help, it's what I'm hoping."

Armstrong just turned to look at him, tears welling her eyes. Her mouth was slightly agape, unable to fathom that someone would do something like this for her. Someone as cold-hearted and unfeeling as her.

She was speechless.

Above everything else she had an overwhelming urge to hug the man that had done something so beautiful for her and her baby.

And she gave into it.

Armstrong just grabbed Roy and pulled him into a kind embrace. It took the Fuhrer a little off guard, but it was a relief as well. He just chuckled warmly to himself and hugged her back. While he held her, he wondered how long it'd been since someone had actually done that for her. His guess would be far too long.

"Thank you, Roy." Armstrong's voice said in a mere whisper right next to his ear. "I mean it. Thank you for doing this for my daughter."

Roy had never heard her speak so softly before, no icy attitude, no sarcasm. It was General Armstrong's true voice, and he was one of the only people that got the honor of hearing it. Her hug was also heartfelt, tight and meaningful.

Roy never really knew how to deal with gratitude, at least not on this scale. "Yeah..." Was all he mustered out. He was just so thrilled that his idea had been a success.

Once Armstrong pulled away from Roy, she quickly wiped her eyes. "You tell anyone I cried, and you're dead."

Roy grinned widely and held his hands up. "My lips are sealed."

Watching Armstrong looking so lovingly at the grave, Roy suddenly felt a hard pang in his chest, which he was unable to ignore. He just hoped she was distracted enough by the grave to notice. Which she was, until she heard something hit the grass next to her.

When she looked over, she saw that Roy was laying on his side, his body tensed in a deep spasm of pain. She quickly made it to him, and got him back into a sitting position. "Hey, hey!" She called out, smacking his face a little.

Was he blacking out?

Roy seemed to immediately snap out of it as soon as he was upright again, but he still felt dazed and a little dizzy.

"Your chest?" Armstrong asked, looking to him for confirmation.

Still looking pained, Roy nodded. "Yeah."

Armstrong took his wrist and felt for his pulse for a few seconds. His pulse felt too quick and irregular for the first few seconds but then began to slow. She watched as Roy pulled his medicine from his jacket pocket and downed a few of the pills.

"Your medicine isn't working as well anymore." She stated.

"You're right—it isn't." Roy conceded. "But I can't be bed-ridden, General. I just can't." Each word he spoke seemed to be more desperate than the last.

Armstrong gave a hard sigh and shook her head. "I know, I know. You tell me often enough." She said, her words tried to come out as cold and uncaring, but it was clear that she was more concerned than she was letting on. "Don't worry. You already know I won't tell anyone about your illness. This is your choice to make and I have no right to tell you otherwise."

"Thank you." Roy said, standing slowly. When he felt he was still being watched he said, "I'm alright now...its passed." Suddenly he started to violently cough. Armstrong had to keep a hand on his shoulder to keep him steady. Once the coughing fit was over, Roy and Armstrong both looked down at his hand and then to each other.

Blood was trickling down his palm.

"Has this happened more than once?" Armstrong asked, even though she already knew the answer. Because Roy didn't seem surprised by the coughing jag or the blood he hacked up.

"I'm fine, General." He said, wiping the blood from his mouth with his sleeve. "I can handle this. It's only a little bit of blood."

"But it'll happen again." She warned him, seeing right through his lie. As she looked at him, he was very pale again and sweat was beading on his forehead when it wasn't even that warm outside. And his pulse had been so off it was unnerving. But he was here because he chose to be, he chose to save Fullmetal's life by offering up his.

"I know it will." Roy said, sounding defeated, he knew he couldn't lie to the General. "But...I have no regrets."

Armstrong smiled softly and patted him on the shoulder. "I know. That's just how parents think." She said, her tone almost as if she admired him. "And let me just say Mustang—you are one hell of a father to those boys."

Roy returned her smile. "Thank you, General." He told her.

As hard as these past few months have been with him being sick, a part of him was a little grateful. He knew more than anyone how much he had changed, he felt like he was becoming more and more of a better person. If he was going to have to leave this earth soon, at least in his last days he'd be someone he could be proud of. Roy wanted more than anything to change the world and this was the place to start. If he could make the ones he loves happy, then maybe...he could die in peace.

And it all started that fateful day of that train crash.

Was that the exact moment he decided to stop only living for himself? Roy didn't know for sure, but what he did know, was his own life wasn't his top priority anymore. The lives of his sons and Riza were, and nothing or no one would ever change that. Every stab of pain was worth it. No amount of suffering was more hurtful than when he watched Fullmetal die in his arms. That was something more terrible than anything Truth or Bradley could throw his way. All those two wanted to do was tear apart the lives of him and the ones he loves, but even will all their meddling, all they really did...

Was make their bonds that much stronger.