Chapter 20: Margaret

Sam and Hosea went into Rhodes to have a few beers and look into the feud between the Grays and the Braithwaites. They heard a lot of the same thing - rumors of gold, no one even knew how the feud started, and it had gone on for years and years. They kept themselves discreet, however, and after a few drinks they left the saloon. Hosea decides to go back to camp while Sam figured she should go do some hunting. She headed over to Caliga Way, a little east of Rhodes, having heard there was good game there. However, when she got there, she spotted a blonde woman with a circus carriage and wondered what was going on, so she approached the woman. As she got close, she noticed the cage was empty. Uh oh.

"Uh, excuse me," Sam began. "But uh, are you with a circus or something?"

The woman glanced at Sam and blinked a few times. "Yes. And uh, I've lost my tiger."

Sam raised a brow. "Your tiger, huh?"

"Yes. I sent our best lion out to find him, and err...now he's missin' too. It is a right old predicament," the woman explained, patting one of her horses on the rump.

Sam chuckled and shook her head. "You lose a bear, too?"

The woman gave Sam a puzzled expression. "Pardon?"

Sam waved a hand off. "Nevermind." Just then she saw Arthur coming in and she started laughing. "Well well, small world."

The woman turned around, then glanced at Sam. "You know him?"

"Oh, he's my uh...my boyfriend."

"Boyfriend?"

Sam sighed, wondering how to explain what a boyfriend actually was. Lover? No, too crass. Gentleman suitor? No, too formal. Sweetheart? Good enough. "My sweetheart."

"Oooh."

Arthur trotted up to Sam. "Fancy meetin' you here. Whatchu up to?" Arthur asked

"Oh, I was out hunting and ran into, um...what's your name?"

"Sally Nash," the blonde woman said.

Sam tipped her hat. "I'm Sam Burke, and this is Arthur Morgan."

Arthur also tipped his hat to Sally. "Did erm, did you lose a tiger?" Arthur asked Sally.

"Yeah, you found one?" Sally inquired excitedly.

"No, I found your caravan down the way. Margaret said that you might need a hand."

Sally nodded. "Well, as I told Miss Burke, the tiger is missin' and I sent out King to find her, now he's missin' too."

"Your lion from Timbuktu, weren't he?"

Sam had to stifle a giggle. "From Valentine, I think. He might be more of a kind of dog than a lion, but in a certain light a feller could never tell," said Sally.

Arthur sighed with a nod. "Of course. Which way'd he go?"

Sam pointed towards the river. "Into them shrubs over there."

"Okay. Why don't you hop up on the wagon and Sam and I'll see if we can find his track."

"Okay. That first set of shrubs...that's where I lost sight of him."

Sam dismounted with Arthur and they both walked towards the river. Sam looked down and started following pawprints. "Lions and tigers," Sam commented with a head shake and a giggle.

"Yeah. Just got their zebra back, only it was actually a painted mule," Arthur said, chuckling.

Sam snorted and let out a puff of air as she tracked. "Oh my God, really?"

"Yup." Arthur wrapped an arm around her. "You're cute when you snort," he whispered into her ear.

Sam grinned and gave him a peck on the cheek. "You're cute when you snore."

"I don't snore."

"Yes you do," Sam laughed.

"Shut up," he groaned, shoving her a little bit.

Sam giggled and refocused on the pawprints. "Got prints!" she yelled.

"Let me bring the wagon along!" Sally shouted back.

Sam tilted her head to one side as she spotted black paint on the ground. "You paint this dog? There's some pigment here!" Arthur shouted.

Sam laughed and shook her head, but when she spotted some blood by a log, she froze. "Um, Arthur?"

Arthur halted too and sighed. "Looks like blood to me...shit."

Sam shut her eyes, taking a deep breath. She opened them then resumed the tracking. There were two sets of pawprints now, so Sam assumed the other belonged to the tiger. There was more blood and eventually they came across the carcass of a dead dog with a lion's mane. Sam put a hand to her mouth.

"Oh, that poor dog..." she said with an intake of breath.

"Oh darn," Arthur groaned as he knelt down next to the dead animal. "We found your dog!" Arthur barked out. "Ex dog, ex lion..."

Sally ran up with a smile. "Hey boy!" But then her smile faded. "Oh...where's the rest of him?"

"I think a cougar took him," Arthur concluded.

"Ah, that's be Stripey...and I always thought they got along."

Arthur stood up with an incredulous expression. "Your tiger is a wild cat?!"

"Uh-huh," Sally said innocently.

Arthur shook his head as Sam wiped her forehead. "What else? You still need it back."

"Oh, yes sir...she's our star attraction!" Sally said in a serious tone.

"Well, let's hope it wants the other half of its dinner," Arthur said, bending over to pick up the dog.

Sam's jaw dropped. "Arthur! You can't be serious!" she screeched with outrage.

"The other half? Really?" Sally asked.

Arthur started walking towards the wagon with the dog/lion on his shoulder. "I'm gonna put him in your wagon. You both find somewhere to hide. You got a better idea?"

"No, but...ah, Jesus H. Roosevelt god damn Christ..." Sam groaned, throwing up her arms and following her boyfriend.

"Oh...well...behind that log than," Sally said as she pointed to a big log by the wagon.

"Okay." Sally and Sam marched over to the log while Arthur put the dead dog into the caged wagon. "Grub's up."

Arthur joined both the women behind the log. "This is so sad," Sam commented depressingly.

"Stay down. She won't be too far away."

"I went out to find a tiger-" Sally started.

"Cougar, you mean," Arthur interrupted.

"And I end up losin' a lion..."

"A dog."

"Ain't havin' any luck," Sally said as she looked over the log.

"If that's what you dealin' with, you didn't have any luck to begin with." Arthur chuckled. "Cougars and dogs..."

"Hey, it ain't what you got on this life, it's what you make of it."

"Well, that's very wise of you. Especially when you're lacking zebras and tigers."

Sam heard movement in the bushes and jerked her head. "I think Stripey's here," she whispered.

Sure enough, a cougar painted like a tiger came stalking out of the bushes. "Look," Sally whispered. "I really don't think she'll eat the dog. Like I said, they was friends."

"Shut it," Arthur hissed.

Sam eyed the cougar and watched it jump into the cage. It snarled and started chewing on the dog and Arthur walked while crouched towards the wagon. "Oh...I guess she's real hungry," Sally said.

"She's feral. I'm lockin' her in." Sam watched with nervous anticipation as Arthur got to the cage, shut the doors and locked the cougar in. Sam and Sally got up and walked to the circus wagon. "Alright, let's go."

Sam got onto Orion and Arthur whistled for Boadicea II while he and Sally climbed onto the wagon.

"We got her! Okay! Drive, will ya? I'll keep an eye on her!" Sally exclaimed joyfully.

"Sure thing," Arthur replied, grabbing the reins and flicking them.

Sam got along side the wagon on Arthur's side. "Let's get her back to Mr. Margaret."

Sam blinked and shook her head as if to clear it. "Mr. Margaret?"

"Yes. Mr. Margaret."

Arthur chuckled. "Mr. Margaret is a man in a dress."

"Oooh," Sam said.

"She's still eatin'...I woulda though...since they was close and all..." Sally commented.

"Well, wild creatures turn on each other," Arthur observed. "Seemin' friendly one minute, dinner the next. Viciousness comes easy."

Sam contemplated his words as Sally and Arthur continued their conversation. She thought about what happened when she and Charles went hunting for bison, when she almost shot a man. Sam could feel the viciousness of this time creeping into body like a sickness. Oh, how she missed 2020 despite the shitstorm the year had started out with. Still, as she looked at her boyfriend, Sam realized, in the words of Dutch, "this world has its consolations". It was going to be very hard for her to leave, but better to have loved and lost than to have never loved at all, right? Was love enough to keep the viciousness out of Sam, though? She wasn't so sure, especially since she was staying with a bunch of outlaws. Eventually Sam saw the caravan insight and she spotted a man in a pink and blue satin dress. Oh boy.

"Mr. Margaret!" Sally called out.

The man turned around, arms raised. "Aha! I see you've found each other."

"Sure did, Mr. Margaret!"

"And who are you?" Margaret asked of Sam.

"I'm Sam Burke. Arthur and I know each other," she replied.

"Oh. Jolly good, jolly good," Margaret said while making his way to the caravan cage.

"You know, tarrin' and featherin' a donkey is one thing," Arthur began as he lowered himself from the wagon.

"I beg your pardon? It's grease paint, make up."

"...but playing dolls dress up with a wild animal, you're gonna wanna be a lot more careful."

"Stripey ate King, Mr. Margaret," said Sally. "I saw her do it."

"And I always thought they got along," Margaret said while looking in the cage at the dead "lion".

"Oh, she liked him just fine. She licked her chops and asked for seconds," Arthur joked, making Sam roll her eyes. "Speakin' of which...you got any more word on that runaway lion or are you gonna pay me for these misfits?"

"Look, I'm well aware that," Margaret moved to the other side of the cage and the couple followed, "we're not Royal Command Performance material. Daddy you were right, god damn you! But a cow barn in Rhodes is hardly Drury bloody Lane!"

"You got any word on the lion?"

"Yes, yes, I've got word on the lion. Shit is the word. Someone saw him near Emerald Ranch. As you know, we're lately very short on lions," Margaret said, motioning to King. "So, I'd be very grateful. All kinds of grateful."

"There's only one kind of grateful I care about," Arthur said, holding up his hands and rubbing his fingers together. Sam and Arthur walked off to their horses and mounted up, then headed north towards the direction of Emerald Ranch. Sam started giggling then burst into a fit of hysterics. "What's so funny?"

"That guy was like the British drag queen version of Joe fucking Exotic, hahahaaa!" Sam said with a laugh.

Arthur chortled. "Someone from your time, I take it?"

"Oh ho ho yeah. A polygymist, gay, redneck, gun toting, drug addicted big cat owner and breeder from Ohklahoma. He owned a zoo and had, like, over two hundred big cats. The show he was on was fucking hilarious!"

"A show? Like a theatre show?"

"Oh no, it was a documentary. Like a, hmm, how do I describe a tv show to you? Well, it's like a movie but it comes in several different parts called episodes. And instead of having actors, a documentary is about capturing real life things."

Arthur cackled and scratched the back of his head. "You know, I kinda wish I could travel to your time for a day just to see what all the fuss is about."

Sam giggled a little. "That would be something."

When they eventually approached Emerald Ranch, they heard some yelling. "Hold it tight! We got him trapped in here!"

"They got it in the barn! Boy, boy!"

"I should go and get my repeater!"

Sam's eyes went wide and she suddenly didn't feel right about this. "Uh, Arthur, what if it's another big cat?" she asked.

Arthur laughed as they both got off their horses and walked towards the barn. "I'm pretty sure it's just a dog."

There were two men holding the green barn doors shut. "Hold your side!" one of them yelled.

"I am holding it, hold yours!" shouted the other.

"What's the ruckus, boys?" Arthur asked them.

"Get back! We got a cursed creature in here!"

"Oh yeah?" Arthur inquired with humor.

"He's as big as a mule and as mean as a hellcat!"

"It looked like a lion to me!"

"That's a dog in there," Arthur explained.

"A dog?"

Sam took a look at the ground and examined the pawprints. They were huge. "Uh, Arthur? I'm pretty sure it's not a dog."

Arthur looked at her. "What makes you say that?"

"Well, the size of these prints. They're huge."

Arthur looked at the ground and hmmed. "Must be a big dog."

Sam eyed him with irritation. "Arthur, this is not a dog. I think it's a real big cat."

Arthur sighed. "Well, I better go in and see."

Sam's eyes widened. "Are you nuts? You'll get killed for sure!" Suddenly there was a load roar from a top of the barn and a lion leaped out from the hayloft. Sam looked up and gasped. "Holy Carole fuckin' Baskin..."

Arthur pulled Sam out of the way as it attacked one of the men and went running away to the stables, killing a cow then a horse in the process. Sam took out her rifle and started shooting at it. Arthur did the same with his revolvers and then they chased after it to the stables. Suddenly it came back out and charged but Sam and Arthur kept shooting until it fell down dead. The couple looked at each other with surprised looks.

"I told you it wasn't a dog!" Sam snapped angrily as she shouldered her rifle.

Arthur holstered his guns and shook his head. "Alright, you were right. Fiiine."

Sam rolled her eyes as people started coming over. "They got it! They shot the thing!" someone said.

"Is it dead? I pray that thing's a goner."

Sam frowned at the animal, saddened that they had to kill it. She knelt down beside the dead lion and started stroking its mane. "Sorry, boy," she whispered.

Really, it wasn't much different than hunting other animals, but for some reason, this kill bothered her immensely. Arthur seemed to notice something was up because he put an arm around her as they walked back to the horses. "You okay?" he asked.

"Yes and no," she replied with a sad sigh. "I mean, it's a lion. Lions are supposed to be free and here's this asshole Margaret using the damn animal like a sideshow freak. And now it's dead because Mr. Margaret is a god damn idiot and has no regard for public fucking safety!"

Arthur kissed her cheek as they continued walking. "I understand. Trust me, I got a few words of my own for that guy."

They both mounted up and headed back towards the area where Mr. Margaret and Sally Nash were waiting and the longer they rode, the angrier Sam got. Some of it was guilt at killing the animal, but mostly it was rage directed at a certain man in drag, so by the time they reached their destination, Sam was seething with anger. She dismounted and stormed over to Margaret.

"Ah! Odysseys returns!" Mr. Margaret exclaimed. "Sally, get the ca-"

Sam punched Margaret in the face and knocked him against the cage. "You fucking asshole!" she yelled.

Margaret cringed and held his nose as Arthur came running up. "What was that for?"

"It was a real fucking lion, you depraved sack of shit! Do you have any idea how much danger you put people in at Emerald Ranch?! The damn thing killed one man and almost got me and Arthur! What the flying fuck is wrong with you?!" Sam yelled before shoving Margaret against the cage.

Arthur grabbed Sam from behind and pulled her back. "Woa woa, calm down, Sam. Relax."

Sam struggled in his grasp as she wanted to rip the guy's face off. Margaret stared at her in horror. "What the bloody hell is wrong with her?"

Once Sam was calm enough to not go after Mr. Margaret, Arthur stood in front of her and narrowed his eyes at the man. "A man-eatin' lion," Arthur said, pointing a finger at Mr. Margaret. "You didn't think that it might be useful for us to know that this time the animal was actually real, you moron?!"

The man held up his hands. "Steady on. I clearly stated that we were looking for a-"

"You haven't clearly stated anything in all the time I've known you! That could've been a good for all we knew!"

"A goose will hardly get them to their feet for the curtain call." Margaret waved his arm towards a cage. "Bring on the King of the Beasts, on the other hand, and they feel the roar and they...well...look about as surprised as you do. What have you done with him if you don't mind me asking?"

Arthur grasped his gun belt. "We killed him. He's dead."

"Bloody hell!" Margaret threw up his hands. "This is rum, old boy."

"Well it was him or us. Now, pay me."

Sam crossed her arms and walked away from the men as they conducted business. She'd heard enough for from Mr. Margaret, at least until he started describing Arthur's payment. She turned around to see Mr. Margaret holding a very big emerald and her eyes went wide.

Suddenly the man pulled the gem back. "Wait, I shouldn't. What would Daddy say?"

Sam rolled her eyes. Okay, this man was nothing like Joe Exotic.