Hello! So this is a very long chapter. I've been cooped up inside thanks to, you know, pandemics and with not much else to do, I have been spending lots of time reading and writing!

I just really quickly want to reach out to libbylu and thank for her reviews! Honestly, I usually hate OCs as well, which is half of the reason I challenged myself to try write one (: I've been working on creating my own characters and writing the different mbti personalities, so hopefully it is not too awful and her presence doesn't ruin the story! :D

Please enjoy this chapter and leave a review to let me know what you think! Thanks for reading!


Zuko walked out onto the deck of his ship. The captain had just announced that Ember Island was in view and he figured now would be as good a time as any to talk to Mai. She stood at the side of the ship, watching the water below lap at the iron hull. Before he could even say anything, she spoke, keeping her gaze on the waves.

"What do you want?"

Zuko was taken aback by how forward she was being; he had never been good at apologies and he had a feeling she was going to make this harder for him.

"I- I came to apologize," Zuko said, looking down.

"Oh? What for?"

He cursed under his breath; this wasn't going to be easy.

"You know what for. You've been avoiding me since this morning."

"I have no idea what you're talking about," Mai replied in her bored tone.

Zuko sighed, "For dragging you along as cover and for lying to you. I… I should have at least… been straight with you about it," he struggled to get out.

"Hm," was her only response.

"Well, we're nearly at Ember Island-"

"Is that what that landmass right in front of us is? I wasn't aware," She interrupted him.

Zuko could tell that this wasn't going as he had hoped and realized that salvaging the situation at this point was beyond his capability. He would have to try again later; the last thing he needed was an angry Mai talking to Azula and bringing up his mysterious disappearance when they returned to the palace. However, Zuko once again underestimated his sister and the lengths she was willing to go to cause him trouble.

When the ship pulled up to the island, Zuko's mouth dropped open and his heartrate increased; Azula smirked wickedly at him from the dock with Ty Lee next to her, waving excitedly at them.

"Zuzu, we were beginning to wonder when you would show up," Azula feigned concern. "Father suggested we join you. Though, we thought you would already be here when we arrived…"

"We stopped elsewhere on the way," He said, stepping onto the dock with Mai at his side.

"How curious, you told Father that you were going to-"

"I'm bored of always coming to Ember Island," Mai interjected with a dismissive wave of her hand, "We spent some time at Hot Spring Cove for a change of scenery. The Fire Nation is so mind-numbingly dull," She complained, walking past Azula, who frowned at her friends flippant response.

Relief washed over Zuko as he rushed to catch up with Mai, trying to hide the look of surprise on his face. If there was one thing that he would always appreciate about Mai it was her ability to defuse Azula with her unyielding apathy. When he was at her side again, he took her hand and squeezed it lightly as a sign of thanks; He would have to actually thank her later. She didn't look at him once as they walked up to the beach house.

Katara rushed through the corridors of the ship at full speed; Aang was finally awake. She flew onto the deck and upon seeing her friend conscious once more, crashed into him at full speed as he grunted in pain.

"Aang! Oh, I'm sorry," She rubbed his shoulder, "I'll heal you up again later. I'm just so glad to see you. You're awake!" She could feel a goofy smile involuntarily creeping across her face and made no attempts at hiding it.

He rubbed his eyes, still groggy, "Are you sure? I feel like I'm dreaming."

"You're not dreaming, you're finally awake," Toph added in, running up to meet them.

"Aang! Good to see you back with the living, buddy!" Sokka yelled as he followed Katara out onto the deck, hugging Aang.

"Sokka?" Aang looked at Sokka in his Fire Nation helmet, obviously confused. He started to lose his balance.

"Uh oh, somebody catch him, he's going to faint!" Toph yelled as they all rushed in towards him.

Sokka scooped up Aang's limp body, before he was able hit the deck, and laid him down carefully, looking up to everyone else with a shrug. After a moment, Aang groaned and his eyes opened again. Katara sat down in front of him.

"Ok, lets just take it easy this time," She said, helping him sit up.

"Why are we on a Fire Nation ship?" Aang gazed up at the bridge, then his friends, "Why is everyone dressed like this? And why am I the only one that's completely out of it?"

Katara placed her hand on his shoulder, realizing he didn't understand the gravity of what had happened weeks ago, when he had died.

"Aang, you… got hurt pretty bad." She glanced up at the rest of them; That was the signal for the small crowd to disperse.

Katara looked down at Aang and decided not to tell him yet; she was going to let him calmly come to and they would talk about it in a healing session or over tea. Knowing her friend and the guilt he carried from abandoning the world 100 years ago, she was certain he was not going to take it well.

She smiled warmly at him and her hand migrated from his shoulder to his head.

"I like you hair," Katara said with a pat.

Aang's sudden movement made her jump as his hands flew to his head.

"I have hair?!" He asked, "How long was I out?"

Katara averted her gaze, "A few weeks." She quickly changed the subject. "You must be hungry."

As if in response, Aang's stomach groaned. They laughed as Katara reached out to help him up.

As they ate, she told him about how they found the water tribe warriors at Chameleon Bay and how they had captured a Fire Nation ship to escape the bay undetected. She mentioned their encounter with the other Fire Navy ship and explained that they were heading North now. Katara hoped if she just kept talking, filling the airspace, he might not ask her about what had happened to him. When Aang tried to stretch and cringed in pain, she took the opportunity.

"Maybe we should go upstairs. You need a healing session."

She pulled water from the bowl next to her knees, her hands gliding and hovering over Aang's bony back. Katara frowned, realizing she could count his ribs; clearly all the seaweed soup she had been feeding him wasn't enough.

"Aang, tell me where the pain feels most intense."

"Ok," He nodded in response as he groaned, "A little higher."

"I do feel a lot of tension right there… let me see if I can-"

Aang's body jolted suddenly, his muscles clenching as he threw his shoulders back. Katara, worried she had hurt him, withdrew her hands.

"Are you ok? I'm sorry I-"

He leant forward, placing his palms on his knees.

"Katara, I didn't just get hurt did I?"

"What?"

"I went down. I was gone… but you brought me back."

Katara bit her lip, "I just used the spirit water from the North, it was nothing really."

"Thank you." He turned and smiled at her, but the pain in his eyes was unmistakable.

"What else am I here for?" She Joked, "Am I good to go again?" Wriggling her watery fingers in an attempt to lighten the mood. "I'm just so glad you're back."

Ember Island was just as Zuko remembered it; the public beaches were busy and the guest house smelled musty, like old women. He sighed as he dropped his and Mai's bags in one of the upstairs rooms. Ty Lee and Azula were already waiting for them to go to beach.

"It's going to be so great to hang out on the beach and do nothing," Ty Lee gushed.

"Let's go, lovebirds!" Azula shouted up to them.

Mai finally met his gaze and they both sighed in unison.

Zuko handed Mai the umbrella as he spread out their blanket. Stepping back, he took the umbrella from her hands to allow her to sit down first. He could be a gentleman sometimes. As they both huddled under the umbrella he scrambled for something to say or do; he definitely owed her one for lying to Azula and he realized they should probably give the appearance of being a couple. Zuko looked to his left and saw a striped conch shell. He grabbed it and turned to Mai.

"Here," He held out the shell, "this is for you."

Mai looked blankly at the shell then up to him.

"Why would I want that?"

"I saw it and I thought it was pretty…" Zuko frowned, still holding the shell. "Don't girls like stuff like this?"

"Maybe stupid girls," Mai replied coldly, turning away.

"Forget it!" Zuko threw the shell. She wasn't making any of this easy for him, but he had to keep trying; He was supposed to be courting her after all. Resting his chin on his palm, he glanced at her in his periphery, thinking about what it would be like if the courting was successful, and hoping that it wouldn't be like this all of the time. She was very pretty, conforming superbly to standards of beauty in the Fire Nation with her fair skin, straight black hair, and light beige eyes. He had grown up around Mai and he knew her father had been grooming her to marry into the royal family since she was a girl. When they were kids he did used to like her more than he would admit, but perhaps that was just because he didn't really have any friends of his own. Mai's father had insisted on her befriending Azula and, for a time, the torment they both received from the Princess was something they felt had in common. However, lately that seemed to be the only thing they had in common; While Zuko was constantly fighting to contain the volcano of raw emotion and anger that threatened to erupt inside of him, Mai was placid as a calm lake on a cloudy day, and detached to boot. He'd heard the phrase 'opposites attract' thrown around before, but he found it impossible to read Mai; she never shared her feelings, quite frankly he wasn't sure she had any, and whenever he had tried to share his, admittedly a rare occurrence, she seemed to ignore him.

Zuko stood up, decidedly uncomfortable, "I'm going to go for a walk."

Mai absentmindedly waved a hand at him as he trudged away through the sand.

He walked parallel to the shoreline, trying to ignore the joyful clamor of the beachgoers around him; quite frankly, he wasn't in the mood to be here at all. Ember Island brought back memories that he preferred to keep repressed, ones that threatened to undo him. He just needed to get through the rest of the weekend.

Looking out to the sea, he tried to distract himself by thinking about his mission. Had the ship escaped the Fire Navy? He couldn't help but wonder what she was doing, the waterbender that had been haunting his dreams and, more recently, his fantasies. He had to admit to himself that his fantasy which had stemmed from her wriggling under him, partially clothed, as he pinned her down on the bed was pretty disturbing, but how was his body supposed to react? His sexual deviance was something he had seen coming for a while, perhaps a biproduct of abuse from his father or just simply a need to be in control. Either way, he realized when he looked down that he was only fueling the fire as an image of Katara's wrists in his hands drifted through his mind. He hastily walked into the water until it was lapping at his waist in an attempt to hide the visual evidence of his growing desire. Fuck the beach, he thought.

On his way back the to the group, after finally calming down, he saw a vender selling ice cream. Zuko figured he couldn't go wrong with this one. He returned to Mai with two cones in his hands and sat down next to her.

"I thought since it's so hot…. Here." As he held the cone out to her, the melting ice cream slid from its position to land in Mai's lap.

She looked down at the ice cream, surprisingly unphased. "Thanks. This is really… refreshing."

Zuko cursed himself under his breath and offered her his cone instead. She just shook her head and turned the other way.

Aang sat down with Sokka, Hakoda, and Katara for lunch as they updated him on the invasion plan.

"We won't be able to mount a massive invasion without the Earth King's armies, but the solar eclipse will still leave the Fire Nation vulnerable," Hakoda explained.

"So," Sokka interrupted excitedly, "we're planning a smaller invasion; just a rag-tag team of our friends and allies from around the Earth Kingdom. But the best part is, the eclipse isn't even our biggest advantage." His voice lowered to a whisper. "We have a secret… you."

"Me?" Aang asked, his mouth full of noodles.

"Yup! The whole world thinks your dead! Isn't that great?" Sokka stood up with triumph as Aang spit noodles all over the deck.

"The world thinks I am dead? How is that good news? That's terrible!" He was suddenly filled with guilt and regret.

"No, it's great! It means the Fire Nation won't be hunting us anymore." Sokka replied. "And even better, they won't be expecting you on the day of black sun."

"No, no, no… This is so messed up!" He grabbed his head. "You don't understand."

Sokka put his hand on Aang's shoulder, "It's not that I don't understand, Aang. But this really is an advantage for us; we have the element of surprise."

Aang just grumbled and stormed off to the kitchen with his bowl. No one would be able to understand what he was feeling; it was like when he first accepted responsibility for running away and abandoning the world to 100 years of war and suffering. He was supposed to represent hope. Now, surely everyone believed that hope was dead. Ba Sing Se, the last stronghold against the Fire Nation, had fallen and the Avatar had died; he had failed again.

He spent the rest of the day in his room meditating, until his friends opened the door.

"Hey Aang, we're going into the town for some food. Want to come?"

"I guess I should try get off this ship for a bit…"

Sokka held out a bandana, "Here, tie this around your head, it'll cover your arrow."

"I'm not going out if I can't wear my arrow proudly!" Aang frowned, he hated this.

"Aang, come on, be practical."

Katara interrupted, "You guys go ahead without us, we'll catch up with you." She sat down at the foot of the bed next to her friend and waved at Sokka and Toph as they left. Then she turned to Aang. "I think I know why you're upset. You don't want to people to think you failed."

"You're right, I don't. But the problem is, I did fail."

"Aang, that's not true!"

"It is true. I was in Ba Sing Se, I was there. But I lost and now the Earth Kingdom has fallen for good."

"It's not for good. Remember, there's still a plan: the invasion!"

"And I hate the invasion plan too!" He grabbed the Fire Nation tapestry that hung over his bed and ripped it from the wall, slinging it across the room. "I don't want you or anyone else risking your lives to fix my mistakes! I've always known that I would have to face the Fire Lord. But now I know I need to do it alone."

"Aang…"

"Katara, please…"

"But-"

"Just go!" His voice was cold.

"Do you… need anything?" She turned to look at him, sadness in her eyes. At his silence, she averted her gaze and walked out of the room.

Aang could feel the anger boiling up inside of him, a feeling he was largely unaccustomed to. He pressed his palms into his brow and muttered, mostly to himself, "I need my honor back."

After a largely uneventful day at the beach, Zuko, Mai, Ty Lee, and Azula returned to the guest house. Azula was still basking in the glory of their ruthless kuai ball victory with diabolical glee. Ty Lee sat next to her, playing with her braid.

"I can't wait for this party! I haven't been to one since leaving the circus."

Azula rolled her eyes at the mention of the circus and turned to Zuko. "I don't think we should tell anyone who we are," She mused, "I'm so used to everyone worshipping us-"

"They should," Ty Lee interjected, ever the enabler.

"Yes, I know and I love it. But, for once I just want to see how people would treat us if they didn't know who we were."

Zuko sighed, "Whatever." He wasn't particularly excited about going to a party to begin with; throughout his life he had never felt comfortable at social gatherings. Perhaps his inability to make idle conversation was to blame. Or maybe it was his general lack of friends and, therefore, practice. He was just hoping he would get the chance to ask Mai why she lied to Azula for him earlier.

Mai sat on the couch next to him with her arms crossed as they watched the party around them. Zuko noticed one of the guys from the beach eying Mai from across the room. Slightly disgruntled, Zuko wrapped his arm around her shoulder and glared at Mai's potential suitor; regardless of how he felt about her, she was here with him and his pride would not allow a lesser man such as this one to show him up in anything. He was the crowned Prince of the Fire Nation and this other guy was just some general's son. Mai didn't seem to notice Ruon-Jian's gaze, nor did she seem to be phased by Zuko's touch, disengaged as usual.

"I'm bored." She stated after a while.

"I wanted to ask you something."

"Hm?"

"Earlier… when you lied to Azula," He began, "Why did you do it?"

Mai looked up at him, one eyebrow slightly raised, then shrugged, "I felt like it."

"Ok, but you didn't have to… I mean, I thought you were mad at me."

"I don't get mad."

"But why?"

She shrugged again, "Maybe I just like undermining your sister sometimes. Everything is so dull, one of the few pleasures in life is throwing a wrench."

Zuko's lip twitched into something that resembled a slight smile. It was such a typical way for Mai to respond; her primary motivation for any action seemed to be boredom.

"Well, thanks."

She waved her hand dismissively in response, "I'm still bored."

"I know."

"I'm hungry."

"So what?"

"So find me some food."

Zuko grunted "Sure," and stood up, figuring it was the least he could do to repay her for saving him from Azula's endless scrutiny. He walked across the room to a table overflowing with food and filled a plate with some dumplings. On his way back to Mai, another partygoer, oblivious to his surroundings, backed into him, knocking the dish from his hands and onto the floor. Anger flared in Zuko as he grabbed the clumsy perpetrator by the shoulder and spun him around.

"Hey, watch it! That food was for my cranky girlfriend!" However, when they turned towards where Mai was still sitting, the same guy from before, Ruon-Jian, was leaning against the wall talking to her with his hand on his hip. Zuko looked back to the guy stood next to him, having also noticed Mai getting hit on, and recognized his expression; they were making a fool of him and he wasn't going to stand for it. He shoved the guy next to him, wiping that stupid look from his face, then stormed over to where Mai sat. Zuko grabbed Ruon-Jian's arm and threw him across the room.

"What are you doing?" The general's son yelled, fixing his hair.

"Stop talking to my girlfriend!"

"Relax, it's just a party," Ruon-Jian responded, approaching them once more, his tone laced with spite.

Zuko could feel the rage rising in him and when Ruon-Jian was within arm's reach, he shoved his chest, propelling him across the room to crash through an ornate vase. At this, Mai stood up.

"Zuko. What the hell is wrong with you?"

"What's wrong with me?" He replied in indignation.

"Your temper is out of control. You blow up over every little thing; you're so impatient and hot-headed and angry."

"Well at least I feel something! As opposed to you. You have no passion for anything! You're just a big blah!"

"It's over, Zuko," Mai said, turning away. "We're done."

Aang grabbed his glider from the corner and headed to the window, wincing in pain as he landed on the deck outside. He had already decided the residual discomfort from his injuries wasn't going to stop him; he had to end this. Opening his glider, he leapt off the ship and into the prevailing wind, heading West towards distant storm clouds, all notions of caution silenced by the unrelenting guilt and anger that flowed through his veins. He was the Avatar. He wasn't dead. He was going to walk straight up to the Fire Lord and face him, one-on-one. He was going to finally end this war and no one would ever doubt him again.

The wind whipped at his face and clothes as he approached the foreboding, towering clouds ahead. The sea below him churned, mirroring how he felt inside. He would not be deterred, pushing on through the worsening weather. Ahead of the clouds in the distance, he spotted a line of Fire Nation Nav ships.

"A blockade…" He mumbled aloud, considering how to best avoid it. Surely they would see him if he tried to fly over. He looked down at the sea below and, without a second thought, collapsed his glider, took a deep breath, and dove below the waves. Propelling himself under the line of vessels, he rose to the surface on the other side, gasping for air. Aang looked over his shoulder to make sure he went unnoticed and grinned at his success; perhaps this wouldn't be so hard after all. Ahead he could see the silhouette of something bobbing in the waves. Swimming over, he was relieved to find a piece of driftwood, which he clung onto; he had an idea. Unfolding his glider once more, he balanced himself as he stood up on the driftwood. The wind caught his glider and he was off, surfing the waves with the wind at his back. As he proceeded, however, the sea continued to churn, even more violently than before.

Lightning crashed in the clouds overhead, illuminating the angry waves in a harsh white light. Then the rain began. Aang narrowed his eyes to keep the rain from blinding him as he continued traversing the growing waves. He winced when a sudden gust filled his glider, jerking his right shoulder forward to keep it in control. The pain that originated in his shoulder and ribs coursed through his arm and down his leg. Aang could feel himself cramping from holding this position, from being battered by the wind and rain and waves. The weeks he spent unconscious, barely eating and completely stationary were suddenly catching up to him; he could feel his muscles giving out, but refused to concede to the numbing pains in his limbs. Surely, he was close now, he just needed to get to shore. Still squinting through the precipitation that was quickly progressing to sleet, he saw a huge figure in front on him; another ship? He barreled forward, trying to make out the shape of the looming figure before him. It was too big to be a ship. Lightning flashed again and his jaw went slack, his widened eyes following the crest of the huge wave.

Thinking on his feet, he jumped off the piece of driftwood and hurled his glider behind him in a last-ditch attempt to fly over the wave. He was moments too late. The wave curled in on itself, knocking Aang and his glider back down towards the churning water below. As he splashed through the surface, his head struck the driftwood and his vision went black.

Aang sunk down into the watery abyss below, air flowing out of his lungs as consciousness escaped him.

Katara hummed an old Southern Water Tribe song to herself as she placed the tea on the tray next to the bowl of rice. She wasn't going to let him get away without eating; he needed all of his strength to finish recovering and the weeks of nothing but seaweed soup had certainly not sufficed. Even if he told her to go away, she would force him to eat.

She admitted to herself that she was a little hurt by how cold he had been earlier. It was a side of Aang she had never seen before; he was always so optimistic and kind. For being so young, he was also surprisingly wise, which may be attributed to his many past lives or just growing up under the monks of the Southern Air Temple. Often, he was the one with words of wisdom and advice, he was so calm and tranquil. But, before, when he had yelled at her, that wasn't like him. She knew he was bothered by the world thinking him dead again. She could only imagine how that weighed on him. After all, less than a year ago the world was convinced that the Avatar was dead and the cycle was broken, there was little hope to be found. It seemed he had just gotten around to forgiving himself for running away 100 years ago, and now this. Katara wished that she had been the one to break the news to him; Sokka was her brother and she loved him, but he could have been a little gentler with Aang. Exclaiming that the whole world thought he was dead was certainly not the best way to go about it. She knew Aang and she had expected this reaction from the moment the words spilled from Sokka's mouth.

Sighing, she picked up the tray and proceeded up to Aang's room. Perhaps she would try talk to him again. Maybe he had cooled off a little. But, when she entered his empty room, the wind blowing in through the open window, she noticed the glider missing from the corner and dropped the tray on the floor.

Overcome with a sense of trepidation, Katara ran out onto the deck of the ship, hoping to catch a glimpse of Aang, hoping to bring him back. She scanned the night sky for any sight of her best friend amongst the stars but saw no hint of him. She cursed, he must have left shortly after she had walked out of his room. Where had he gone? Surely, he wasn't actually going to fly right into the Fire Nation alone. What was he thinking? Looking up to the sky once more, begging the universe to have mercy on him, she crumpled into a pile on the deck, tears streaming down her eyes.

Hakoda and Bato were approaching her, but upon seeing her tears, Bato looked to his friend and said solemnly, "I'll leave you two alone." Hakoda nodded thanks as he walked away.

"Katara! Katara, what's wrong?" Hakoda crouched by his daughter's side, placing a hand on her back.

Katara sniffled, looking up to her father from her crumpled position on the ground. "H-he left," she stuttered.

"What?"

"Aang. He just took his glider and d-disappeared. He has this ridiculous notion that he has to save the world alone; that it's all his responsibility."

"Maybe that's his way of being brave," Hakoda tried to comfort her, rubbing circles on her back.

"It's not brave! It's selfish and stupid! We could be helping him, and- I know the world needs him, but doesn't he know how much we need him too? How could he just leave us behind?"

Hakoda looked to the ground, realizing the meaning of her words, "You're talking about me, too, aren't you?"

Tears flooded from her eyes as they met her father's; all of the things she had left unsaid since their reunion, flowing out of her, "How could you leave us, dad? I mean, I know we had Gran Gran and she loved us, but- but we were just so lost without you." She thought of all the things that had happened since she'd last seen her dad. Unsolicited, Zuko entered her thoughts. Why?

"I'm so sorry, Katara." Hakoda pulled his daughter into an embrace, letting her sob into his chest.

"I understand why you left. I really do. And… I know that you had to go. So… w-why do I still feel this way? I'm so sad and… angry and… hurt." She buried her face deeper in her father's chest, soaking the front of his Fire Nation uniform with her salty tears.

Hakoda reached up and stroked her hair, resting his chin on the top of her head, "I love you more than anything. You and your brother are my entire world. I thought about you every day I was gone and every night when I went to sleep, I would lie awake missing you both so much it would ache."

She sniffled again, starting to calm down. Slowly, she began to realize that he was right; this wasn't just about Aang. Ever since her father left, Katara had been facing a string of abandonments and betrayals. She was still young, just a teenager; and without a parental figure in her life to advise her, to share wisdom, to show her the way, she had felt alone and lost. Her instinct had been to trust everyone, to believe in the good in people, because her naivety and inexperience suggested that there was no other way. At every turn she had been missing those red flags, signs that she should be cautious, that she should think twice. Her trust in adults, in government, in authority, and in people in general had been repeatedly betrayed and she had been left to learn the hard way, the painful way; so vulnerable to a world that was suffering, a world that didn't consider her an exception.

But perhaps the hardest part was that she had to stay strong for everyone else, for Aang and her brother and Toph. Becoming the motherly figure of the group was her natural instinct, she had mothered Sokka for years, but it was also exhausting. She rarely felt like she had the luxury to just break down and cry, to share her disquiet and pain with her friends and her brother because they needed her to be stable and resilient. So, as a means of survival and self-preservation, she had bottled up all her misconceptions and shortcomings, she had hidden away all of the pain and regret, ignoring the nagging feelings as best she could. With no one to talk to about any of it, she hadn't learned; she had only internalized a very pessimistic perspective of the world, so unlike her natural disposition. And when she was in the catacombs under Ba Sing Se, she had trusted Zuko, nescient to the fact that she was doing it again, setting herself up for more disappointment and betrayal. For a brief moment, her fingers tingled, remembering the texture of his scar, the sensation of being so close to him; was it really all a lie? She answered herself before her mind tried to reason any further: yes. Now, everything she perceived as betrayal was just piling up into an insurmountable problem that would eventually wreak havoc on her sense of self.

Katara pulled away from her father's embrace enough to look up at him again, noticing tears forming in the corners of eyes. She felt a pang of guilt, realizing that she had subconsciously lumped her own father into this episode of emotional upheaval. She couldn't deny that he did play a role, but it was hardly his fault; she knew that. However, he did not deserve to be the only one on the receiving end.

"Dad, I'm sorry. I… this isn't just about you and Aang. I don't mean to unleash my pent-up emotion on you like it's all your fault-"

Hakoda interrupted Katara by pulling her into another tight embrace.

"Don't apologize, Katara. I'm your father, that's what I'm here for." He squeezed her tight and she sobbed again, but this time it was from relief. "You can always talk to me."

Katara smiled into his shirt and a muffled, "I love you," escaped her lips.

Zuko stormed out of the party and onto the beach, burning nearby foliage as he went.

"Fuck them. Fuck her. Fuck this whole fucking island!" He grumbled as he set another bush aflame.

His pride had been hurt and all he had wanted to do in that moment was proclaim himself the crowned Prince and burn the whole fucking place down to the ground. He didn't even like Mai all that much; sure, she was his 'girlfriend' by name, but that was just because this courtship had been planned out for them since childhood. At the present, he harbored no romantic feelings for the girl and he couldn't care less how she felt about him. The injustice of it all was that when he was around, she was supposed to be his, but instead, she had made him look like a fool in front of everyone. She had taken his ego and trampled on it, thrusting it into the dirt for an audience. He reminded himself he was the crown Prince one more time as he torched another tree and proceeded to stomp out into the waves. Steam formed at the interface between his heated skin and the cool ocean water, emanating off him and twirling upwards into the breeze. He exhaled through his nostrils, producing more steam.

She must be trying to get back at him for abandoning her on the ship the other night, using her as cover for his treasonous mission, he thought as the waves lapped at his clothes. He hated this feeling; the implacable rage and hatred that was nearly impossible for him to pacify. When he wasn't overtly angry, he was nurturing a burning sense of self-loathing and, more recently, guilt. Then, inevitably, his temper would boil over again and he would have something else to hate himself for when the anger subsided once more; it was a vicious cycle. He breathed heavily, trying to focus on the feeling of the water around him absorbing the heat that was radiating from his body.

Unbidden, Katara entered his thoughts. Perhaps it was the waist-deep water that reminded him of her; it was her element, after all. But it was more than that; she was so like the element that she wielded. Somehow, she had been able to placate the muddled concoction of self-contempt and fury that burned inside him, dominated him, with just a look of understanding and a touch. At least, momentarily. Had he spent more time in her presence back in the catacombs, maybe she could have mended his broken insides, putting the pieces of his torn spirit back in place; pulling the pent up rage out of him like the waves drawing away his heat. Despite himself, he began to calm down.

When he shivered, he decided it was time to get out of the water. Trudging back onto the shore, Zuko sighed audibly as he recognized Mai, Azula, and Ty Lee, sitting on driftwood farther down the beach, between him and the guesthouse. There was no avoiding them.

"Zuzu, did you just go for a swim?" Azula half-mocked him as he approached, eying his dripping clothes.

Mai made a point to look away when he neared them, glaring off into the distance.

Zuko threw himself down on a piece of driftwood across from them and scowled. "That party was stupid."

"I have to agree with my brother on this one," Azula added, "All of those boys were so feeble and impotent."

"I thought it was fun," Ty Lee interjected.

"You would think it was fun," Zuko snapped at her. "You're stuck in your little Ty Lee world where everything is great all the time."

At this, Mai turned towards him, "Zuko, leave her alone."

He ignored Mai, proceeding to put on a mocking tone, "I'm so pretty, look at me, I can walk on my hands" Zuko did a handstand to illustrate his point, glaring at the girls upside down, before falling forwards onto his back and mumbling, "circus-freak."

Azula chuckled as tears started to form in Ty Lee's eyes.

"Yes, I'm a circus freak. Go ahead and laugh all you want. You want to know why I joined the circus?"

"Hear we go…" Azula rolled her eyes.

"Do you have any idea what my home life was like? Growing up with six sisters who look exactly like me? It was like I didn't even have my own name! I joined the circus because I was scared of spending the rest of my life as part of a matched set. At least I'm different now. Circus freak is a compliment."

"I guess that explains why you need ten boyfriends too," Mai said, her eyes narrowed.

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Attention issues. You couldn't get enough attention when you were a kid so you're trying to make up for it now." She replied.

"Well, what's your excuse, Mai? You were an only child for fifteen years, but even with all of that attention, your aura is this dingy, pasty-"

"I don't believe in auras," Mai interrupted.

"Yea, you don't believe in anything." Zuko countered, standing up.

"Oh, well, I'm sorry I cant be as high strung and crazy as the rest of you."

"I'm sorry too. I wish you would be high strung and crazy for once, instead of keeping all your feelings bottled up inside! She just called your aura dingy, are you going take that?"

"What do you want from me? A teary confession about how hard my childhood was? Well, it wasn't. I was a rich, only-child who got anything I wanted. As long as I behaved and sat still and didn't speak unless spoken to."

"Well that's it then," Azula joined in, "You had controlling parents with certain expectations and if you strayed from them, you were shut down. That's why you're afraid to care about anything and why you can't express yourself."

"You want me to express myself? Leave me alone!" She shouted at them, looking towards Zuko. "I'm still mad at you."

"I thought you didn't get mad?" He said.

"Ugh, just shut up!" Mai yelled, covering her ears.

"My life hasn't been that easy either, Mai."

"Whatever, that doesn't excuse the way you've been acting."

"Calm down you guys! This much negative energy is bad for your skin; you'll totally break out."

"Bad skin?" Zuko turned to Ty Lee, "Normal teenagers worry about bad skin. I don't have that luxury. My father decided to teach me a permanent lesson on my face!" He pointed to the marred skin that covered the left side of his face.

"Sorry, Zuko. I-"

"For so long, I thought that if my dad accepted me, I'd be happy. I'm back home now, my dad talks to me," He let out a dark chuckle as he paced around, "He even thinks I'm a hero. Everything should be perfect right? I should be happy now. But I'm not! I'm angrier than ever and I don't know why!"

"There's a simple question you need to answer then. Who are you angry at?" Azula asked.

"Everyone. No one. I'm just angry. I don't know!" Zuko brought his hands up to his head.

"Answer the question, Zuko." Mai, chimed in.

"Yea, who are you angry at?" Ty Lee questioned.

The rage was back and was spilling out of him, "I'm angry at myself!" he yelled, flame erupting from his hands as swung them towards the ground. Fire flashed in his vision as a wall of flames exploded from the ground before him.

"…Why?"

"Because I'm confused..." He thought of Ba Sing Se, of his Uncle. He thought of Katara. "Because I'm not sure I know the difference between right and wrong anymore."

Her fingers caressed the skin that he would allow no one else to touch. Her eyes mirrored his own pain and suffering, but met his gaze with hope.

But I want to.


Wow! That was long! In fact, I think this is the longest chapter so far...

And yes, Zuko is probably going to be a bit of a sexual deviant in this story... I can't help myself. I rated M for this.

I hope you enjoyed reading and please please please review - I love feedback!