After a long, cool shower, during which she barely managed to not think about Tartarus, Maggie is drawn upstairs to the attic. She doesn't really know why, but being there brings her comfort. She shuffles to the couch that had been moved there for Harry when the Elders had taken the Book Of Shadows. Before sitting down, she grabs the Book, settling it on her lap. She places her hand on the triquetra, letting out a breath. As she sits there, her thoughts drift to Macy and what she'd learned.
What happened? Was she attacked by a demon? Or was it a disease or some other illness? And how did mom bring her back? She knows that their mother's powers was prophecy. Could she have had another? Charity has multiple powers, did that mean Marisol did as well? Or did she find some other way? Did her being resurrected have anything to do with the 'darkness' in her?
Maggie wishes she could talk to her mother about it. She wishes she could ask her if she should tell her and Mel or if she should keep it to herself. Macy does deserve to know why mom left her,she thinks, but if I tell them that they will want to know how I found out and if I heard anything else, which I did. She doesn't know how Mel would react to the news about her being the half sister rather than Macy.
She wonders how angry Mel would be if she found out that Maggie was the reason she grew up without her father. Probably very angry, she thinks, recalling her obsession with finding out who killed Marisol and how angry she'd been. She'll probably wind up hating me. Not like I wouldn't deserve it. I did cost her her father after all, she thinks bitterly. She shakes the thoughts of Mel and Ray away and goes back to her dilemma about Macy.
She remembers how heartbroken her mom had sounded when she mentioned the sacrifice. She could imagine the tears welling up in her eyes as she spoke. Her own tears well up just thinking about it and she angrily wipes them away. She still doesn't know what she should do.
She looks down at the book in her lap and opens it, idly flipping the pages. "Don't suppose you could help me make a decision about this, could you?" She startles when she hears a voice in the doorway.
"And what decision would you like help in making?" Harry asks, subtly looking over her bare arms. Thank goodness, he thinks upon seeing only the scorpion venom.
"Harry! Don't sneak up on people like that!" She exclaims, holding a hand to her heart and feeling it racing.
He chuckles lightly. "I apologize, Maggie. I though you might have heard me come in."
"Its okay. I guess I'm just still adjusting to being back," she says with a small shrug.
"And how are you adjusting? Not still unsure if you are truly out, are you?"
"No I know I'm out."
His face brightens at that. "Excellent!"
"Yeah I guess."
Its quiet for a moment when he asks, "So what decision do you need help making?" She looks at him blankly. "When I came in, you were asking for help on making a decision. Though I wasn't t sure if you were speaking to me or the book. You were staring at it pretty intently." He cheers internally at her upturned lips.
"Its nothing," she says, her smile fading, "just something I learned about while I was there."
"Would you like to talk with me about it?" When he sees her hesitation, he adds, "Or if not with me, then perhaps with one or both of your sisters?"
"I don't know. What I found out is something big. And I found out something else too, something that could drive us apart. Well me and Mel, at least." She feels her eyes fill with tears again, but she doesn't bother to wipe them away this time.
His brow furrows in concern. What could possibly drive them apart? They've known each other for their whole lives, they've got to be the closest sisters I've seen. He moves to sit beside her. "Surely it can't be that bad. Your sisters love you, Maggie. So much. Whatever you've found out, I'm sure it will bring you three even closer than before."
"I cost my sister something, Harry. Something that no one should have to go without. I don't think she'd ever forgive me for it. And while I was finding that out, I found out something about Macy that will hurt Mel even more." Harry feels his stomach drop at the thought of something happening to Macy. "While I was there, after being shown the memory, I vowed that Mel would never find out. And if I tell them about Macy, they'll want to know everything else I saw in that memory. I don't want to hurt Mel even more than she's already been hurt, but Macy needs to know why mom left her. I just-I don't know what to do, Harry. Do I tell them about Macy, and therefore everything, or do I say nothing, and let her keep thinking that mom didn't want her?" The tears that she'd been keeping at bay stream down her face she breaks down into sobs.
Harry puts his arms around her and pulls her close, rubbing his hand up and down her back, fighting back his own tears. He turns his head to the doorway when he hears footsteps approaching and sees Mel. Her eyes widen when she spots her sister crying her eyes out in Harry's arms and starts towards them. Harry stops her with a shake of his head.
She's opening up to me, he mouths, let me handle this. She nods reluctantly and leaves the attic. He knows Mel would rather be the one Maggie opens up to, and to be honest, he would prefer that as well-he'd never been good with crying women-but if he'd let her stay he knew Maggie would clam up.
He is insanely curious as to what she's hiding from her sisters and hopes he can get her to tell him. Maybe then I can talk her into telling them herself. His mind races at the secrets she is hiding, each idea sounding worse than the one before it. Eventually he's pulled out of his thoughts as he feels Maggie shift.
"Feel better?" Is the first thing he thinks to say.
She snorts. "No. I still don't know what to do, Harry."
"Why don't you tell me about the memory? I might can help you come to the right conclusion." He offers, hopefully.
She hesitates, knowing that he'll try to convince her to talk to Mel and Macy regardless of what she says. She knows he'll mean well, but she doesn't know what she'd do if it causes Mel to hate her. And Macy would likely be stuck in the middle since they share a father. She could wind up hating me too, if only for being put in that position, Maggie thinks. She sighs heavily.
"Maggie. Tell me. Please." He pleads softly.
She sighs again and moves to sit cross legged against the arm of the couch so she can face him. "You know Ray left mom when I was five right?" She waits for his nod. "Well in the weeks leading up to him leaving, they fought. A lot. Usually they would start after me and Mel went to bed and it would wake us up. One of us would go to the other's room because they would get so loud and it would scare us. Mostly it was her coming to me," she says, smiling fondly at the games Mel would invent in an effort to distract them.
Shaking herself, she continues. "The night after my fifth birthday, Mel went to stay the night with a friend. I was woken up by them fighting and had decided to go to Mel's room, since it was farther away and the yelling wouldn't have been so loud. They were in the kitchen and on the way, I heard something shatter. Then their voices grew louder and I could hear what they were saying." Her voice trails off as she gets lost in the memory.
Harry watches her eyes glaze over and glances at her hands, watching as she seems to subconsciously move her right hand to her left forearm. He grabs both of her hands and twines their fingers. Then he starts to gently speak to her.
"Maggie. Maggie, come back. You're not there anymore. You're not five years old, listening to your parents. You are in the attic, with me, Harry. Come back to me, okay?" As her breathing starts to pick up, he grips her hands tighter and calls to her telepathically.
Maggie. Maggie its Harry. I need you to slow your breathing. Whatever you're seeing, its in the past. You're in the attic, with me. Come back to me okay?
He keeps up the stream of thoughts, hoping she can hear him. After several minutes, he debates whether or not he should get Mel. Just as he thinks that, however, Maggie's eyes begin to refocus and she blinks slowly.
"Maggie? You with me?" He gets a slight nod. He gives a small sigh of relief. "Do you want to finish telling me another time? We can go downstairs and get you something to eat." She shakes her head. His next question slips out before he can stop it. "Do you want to continue?" He receives a nod. "Are you sure? I don't want to push you." Again her answer is a nod, this one stronger. "Alright. Take your time."
They sit there, Harry wondering how wise it is to let her continue and Maggie gathering her courage to finish. After a few moments, he is relieved to note that she is no longer breathing heavily. Eventually, she closes her eyes and takes a deep, steadying breath, holding it for a few seconds before letting it out slowly.
She opens her mouth, with her eyes still closed. "Ray isn't my father." Harry's eyebrows shoot up in surprise. "That's what the fight was about. He found out somehow and confronted mom about it. He was…so angry and hurt about it. That's why he left. He couldn't stand the thought of being a father to a child that wasn't his. So he left, leaving behind his own daughter, because mom had sex with Dexter and had me." She scoffs bitterly. "If mom had never had sex with Dexter, Mel would still have Ray in her life."
It takes Harry a minute to get over the shock of her revelation. "But if she hadn't gotten with Dexter again, you wouldn't exist, Maggie. Don't you think Mel would rather have you than her father? Her father, who might have left her and your mother regardless if you weren't born? You said they were fighting long before he actually left. And from the sound of it, he had only just found out about you not being his. Had he not found out, he still could have left the night after your birthday."
Her brow furrows. She had never though of it that way. Could they have split up had he not found out? Would Mel have still grown up without him? It doesn't matter, she thinks, the could haves and would haves never happened. Mel will still likely hate me if she finds out.
Harry studies her expression closely, watching as the hope that grew after he spoke fades away. He sighs sadly, knowing that she still thinks Mel will hate her if she were to ever find out. In an effort to distract her, he asks about what she found out about Macy.
"During their fight, when Ray brought them up, saying he thought she was done with them, she told him that he knew the reason she had to leave them. That, if she and Macy were to ever see each other again, one of them would die." She doesn't want to say anything more, knowing that if she tells him why, it'll only serve to hurt him.
He stops breathing when she says that one of them would die. He has a feeling he knows which one would have been lost. Why would Marisol risk Macy's safety by bringing her to Hilltowne though? Did she know she would die before she would lay her eyes on her daughter? He hates to admit it, but he is glad that everything happened the way it did. He just doesn't know what could be so powerful that it would kill one of them. Silently he urges her to continue.
He can see the pain in her eyes when she does. "At some point, Macy was dead. I don't know what happened, but mom resurrected her. She said something about a sacrifice and that that was why they couldn't see each other again." Her voice is low and she eyes him carefully, knowing his reaction won't be a good one.
Suddenly, he can't breathe. Her words, Macy was dead, repeat over and over in his head. He wants to yell at Maggie, call her a liar, but he knows, by the pain he can see in her own posture, in the way she's hunching over, that her words are true. The gasp that leaves his lips is ragged and soon he feels tears sliding down his face. He can feel himself begin to shakes as pain tears through him at the mere thought that he and Macy could never have met, that, if Marisol hadn't done what she did, he never would have met the amazing woman who stole his heart.
"M-Macy was dead?" He chokes out.
"Yes. But Harry, she's alive now. Thanks to mom. Okay?" I knew it was a mistake to tell him. I knew how much he loves her, she berates herself. How do I pull him out of this? She racks her mind, trying to think of something that would reassure him of Macy's safety. His phone chimes, indicating he has a message. It gives her an idea.
She reaches in the pocket of his pants, pulling out his phone and scrolling through it to find Macy's number. She snorts at the little red heart beside the contact name and dials. As it begins ringing, she puts it up to Harry's ear, hoping this will work. She can just make out Macy's voice when she answers.
"Hello?" Harry doesn't answer beyond a choked noise. "Harry? Are you okay? Are Maggie and Mel?" The concern in her questions is heard easily. Maggie can see, though, that hearing Macy's voice has already helped calm him. Damn he has it bad for her, she can't help but think. She pulls the phone away from his ear and puts it to her own.
"Hey, Mace."
"Maggie? Is everything okay? What's wrong with Harry? Is it a demon? Do I need to come home?" She asks rapidly.
"Macy. Macy calm down. Everything is fine. I told Harry something and he kinda panicked. So I did the only thing I could think of to calm him down. I called you."
On the other end of the phone, confusion swirls through Macy. Why would calling me calm him down? And so easily? She doesn't want to let herself hope but a tiny part of her longs for him to love her just as she loves him. "You called me to calm him down? What made you think that would even work?"
"Just knew it would," she says matter of factly.
Macy blinks. "Okay," she says slowly. "What did you tell him anyway? He's always so put together, I didn't think anything could make him panic."
When it comes to you, Macy, I think everything poised about him goes out the window. "I was telling him about one of the memories that was unburied while I was in Tartarus." Its said quietly, but Macy can still hear the barely there pain in her sister's voice.
"Oh," is all she can think to say. While she's glad Maggie is opening up about it, she can't help but wish it was to her and Mel, though she has nothing at all against her sharing with Harry. She's curious about what she saw that would make her fall apart like she has.
"Yeah. I'll, uh, I'll let you get back to work now. Sorry for worrying you."
"It's okay. I'll see you guys when I get home, yeah?"
"Yeah."
"Okay. Love you guys." Macy waits for Maggie's quiet 'love you too' before ending the call.
It's quiet for a while as Harry settles from his small panic attack and Maggie thinks over what she'd told him. She wonders if Mel would have the same reaction if she were to find out about Macy. She doesn't think it would lead to a full blown panic attack like it did with Harry but she knows Mel would freak out at least a little. Though the only reason he reacted that badly, is because he loves her, she thinks.
"Thank you." Her brow furrows as she turns to Harry, confused. "For confiding in me, about the whole memory. And for helping calm me down. Though I'm not quite sure how you knew hearing her voice would help." He raises a questioning eyebrow at her.
She laughs sheepishly. "Remember when we initiated you into the sisterhood?" She waits for his somewhat cautious nod. "Yeah so I may have kinda accidentally heard a thought from you that night."
He tilts his head. "What thought?"
"A thought about Macy?" It comes out as more of a question than a statement. She watches his eyes widen as he realizes that she knows. "I didn't mean to hear it. It was before I learned to control my powers. But after I heard it, I started watching you. I saw the looks that you'd give her when you thought no one was looking and realized that you had it bad for her and I know it was an invasion of privacy but I honestly didn't mean to and please don't be mad." Her rambling is cut off as he lets out a slightly embarrassed laugh.
"I suppose that explains the feelings of being watched."
"Yeah. I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to hear it."
"Its alright, Maggie. I guess, in the end, it was a good thing you heard it. You would have more trouble calming me down otherwise."
"You really aren't mad? Cause when it happened when I touched Macy or Mel, they always got mad, even when it was an accident. But I never meant to do it. I've always been a touchy person and when I touch someone the thoughts and emotions are just there. I react to them because, to me, its like they've been spoken." She explains.
"No, Maggie. I'm not mad. Like you said, you still didn't have full control yet." She lets out a small breath of relief and smiles at him.
She wishes Mel and Macy understood that. Even though she does her best to hide it, it hurts when they shy away from her. Even after she learned how to control it they still shy away. Always chastising her, telling her 'boundaries' when she simply wants to give them a hug. To go from always having some form of physical contact with someone to suddenly having nothing makes her a bit touch starved. She knows if she told them, they'd stop shying away but they'd still be uncomfortable the entire time.
She understands their position completely. If one of them had been the empath, she'd be uncomfortable with their touch too. Then again, they aren't all that big on touching people. Not like I am at least.
"I wish Mel and Macy were so understanding. Going from being able to give Mel a hug to having her shy away practically overnight kind of hurt. I mean, I get it but still." She looks down at her lap, sighing sadly.
Harry furrows his brow. "Have you talked to them about it?"
"It wouldn't help. Even if I did and they let me touch them again, they would still be uncomfortable." She shrugs, looking down at the black on her arms, tracing the veins with the fingers on her right hand.
Harry follows her gaze. "I wish I could heal that for you."
She shrugs again. "It'll go away on its own."
"Have you decided if you are going to tell them?"
Maggie's quiet for several moments. He lets her think, inwardly hoping that she will. Eventually she heaves out a heavy sigh.
"I will. They deserve to know." When she raises her head, he can see a sheen of tears in her eyes and his heart aches for her. He pulls her close, pressing a light kiss to her temple.
"All will be well, Maggie. Mel won't be angry at you, nor will she hate you. If anything, she'll be even more mad at Ray. He's the one that willingly left."
"Because of me," she chokes out.
"No. I believe he would have left regardless of whether or not you were his daughter. And I know you won't believe it, not for a while at least, but I do. And so will Mel." He tightens his hold on her as she starts to sob once more.
