The scent of death was in the room now, as Thomas Blake lay stricken, ashen and gasping for air in his bed. Jean knew it was only a matter of time until he passed, and she had no idea what would happen after that.
The young District Nurse Mattie O'Brien was listening to his chest with her stethoscope. When she finished, she looked at Jean sadly and shook her head. Since neither of them knew just how much the doctor could hear or understand, Mattie didn't say aloud that which they both knew, that he probably wouldn't last the day.
"Jean, I'll keep him company for a while," said Mattie. "Why don't you take a break?"
"I'll just pop the kettle on," said Jean. She gave the doctor's hand a gentle pat on her way from the room.
As she waited for the water to boil, she sank down onto a chair, tired to her very bones. Ever since the doctor had come home to die in his own bed, Jean's days had been long and exhausting. She certainly didn't begrudge him the extra work, not after his years of kindness to her. In fact, she preferred to stay busy.
It was in her few idle moments like this that she found herself wondering what came next for her. When the doctor was gone she supposed she would be kept on until his affairs were settled and the house was sold, but then what? She honestly had no idea what she would do, or even what she wanted to do.
She thought back to her youth and all the dreams she'd had of seeing the world. Maybe once this was finally over and done, she'd go down to the railway station and take the first train out of town, find a new city to call home. Or why stop there? Why not an airplane? She'd always wanted to see Sydney, or maybe Adelaide for a visit to Christopher. There was really nothing keeping her in Ballarat, now that both her sons were long gone from here.
She shook herself, marveling at her own foolishness. She knew perfectly well she'd never do any of those things. She was Jean Beazley, farmer's widow and housekeeper, nothing more, despite those long ago yearnings.
Impatiently she stood to see to the kettle, but just as she poured the boiling water into the teapot there came a knock at the front door.
"Who could that be?" she murmured to herself. Everyone in town knew Doctor Blake was in no condition to receive visitors.
She pulled the door open to reveal a tall man in a rumpled suit, a traveling case in his hand. He wore a fedora that concealed the upper half of his face as he looked down at his feet. Must be a salesman with his case of samples, she thought.
When he saw her, he removed his hat politely and looked up at her. She was struck at once by his amazingly blue eyes as they looked her over.
Something shifted inside Jean as she immediately realized this was no traveling salesman. She didn't know yet who he was, but a feeling stole over her that her entire life was about to change.
Some day
I'm gonna ride that train
I'm gonna fly that plane
I'm gonna get so high
I'll let my demons die
Some day
