Mind Tricks
Stef sips at her beer in the dimly lit bar. It was just after seven p.m. on a Sunday night. The blonde cop was one of the very few patrons in the bar tonight. This was her third beer but she still couldn't get the look on Lena's face as she turned to leave the apartment out of her brain. What had she done?
Stef knew what she had done. She had just walked out on her wife of six months. How could she have done something so stupid? Stef brings the glass bottle back to her mouth, sending its contents down her throat before signalling the bartender for another one. There was no way that the rotten feeling in Stef's gut was going away on its own tonight.
Just as Stef is taking her first sip of her fifth beer, a man takes a seat next to her. He motions to the bartender - ordering the same thing Stef is drinking - and then turns to face the blonde cop.
"Hey, Stef." Mike says, studying his partner. "You look like hell."
"What do you want, Mike?" Stef asks him bitterly, taking another swig of her beer.
"Lena called me." He says plainly. When Stef doesn't respond, he continues. "She's worried about you. She sounded upset." Stef's silence remains. "Are you going to tell me what happened between you two lovebirds?"
"It's none of your business, Mike." Stef tells him, ringing her hands around the beer bottle in front of her.
"Stef, Lena sounded really upset. What happened?" Mike persists.
"She wants kids." Stef replies simply with a shrug of her shoulders.
"What's wrong with kids?" Mike asks. That's what all this was about?
"I can't do it, Mike." Stef sighs.
"Can't do what?" Her partner asks.
"I can't, I can't raise kids." Stef finally admits, shaking her head.
"I don't understand. What do you mean 'you can't raise kids'?" Mike pushes, trying to understand what's going through Stef's mind.
"I just can't do it." Stef repeats. "I won't be good at it."
"That's the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." Mike chuckles.
"Is it, Mike?" Stef's voice drips with self-contempt. "My parents divorced. I was raised by a homophobic Republican. It took me twenty-six years to figure out that I was gay. No kid deserves to go through that."
"You're right, Stef." Mike agrees. "It sucks that you had to go through that as a kid. It really does. But that just means you'll make extra sure that your kids wouldn't feel the way that you did growing up." Stef stares straight ahead, avoiding her partner. "Stef, we've been working together for five years. I trust you with my life. So believe me when I say that you would be an awesome mother. You are so protective and caring. I've seen the way you take care of victims of a car crash while we're waiting for the paramedics. I've seen you console parents after telling them their child has died. Stef, you need to give yourself a break. You aren't your father." Mike stops to place his hand over Stef's. "You and Lena love each other more than any other two people in this world. I'm sure of that. And at the end of the day, love is what kids really need."
"I still don't know if I can do it." Stef sighs.
"Then you need to talk to Lena - your wife." Mike insists.
"I hate you a little." Stef tells Mike with a shake of her head.
"Why?" Mike asks tentatively.
"Because you're right." The blonde cop chuckles.
Trying to be as quiet as possible, Stef unlocks the door of her and Lena's apartment and sets her keys and wallet on the counter. It was well past midnight. Surely Lena was already asleep. Stef herself was feeling exhausted - but five beers in just a few hours will do that to you. She was thankful for Mike tonight - both for his words and the ride home that he gave her. She would have to go and get her car from the bar during the light of day.
The apartment is dark. Stef crosses from the kitchen - where the remnants of their uneaten dinner are still sitting - to the living room. A quick glance down the hall tells Stef that Lena must be asleep - for the light was off in their bedroom as well. With a quiet sigh, Stef makes her way down the hallway. She hoped she'd be able to slip into bed without waking Lena. Just outside the bedroom door, Stef stops to listen. She hears a soft sound coming from beyond the door. Quietly, Stef pushes the unlatched bedroom door open.
In their bed, in the darkness, Lena is crying softly into her pillow. Stef feels her heart crack in her chest. Without a second thought, the blonde woman crosses into the room. Kneeling down beside Lena's side of the bed, Stef runs her fingers through her wife's curly hair.
"Shh, baby, shh." She murmurs. "I'm sorry, baby." Stef can feel that her wife's pillowcase is soaked with her tears. How long has she been crying like this?
"Stef?" Lena chokes out through her tears, blinking and looking up at Stef with her big, brown eyes.
"Oh, baby, I'm so sorry." Stef murmurs, wiping away her wife's tears with her thumbs.
"I didn't know if you were going to come back." Lena says, her voice cracking and more tears rolling down her cheeks.
"Oh, baby, shh." Stef says, wrapping Lena into her arms as she slips into the bed with her. "I would never not come back." The blonde continues, gently stroking her wife's hair.
"I didn't know." Lena whispers quietly against Stef's chest.
"I'm so sorry, baby." Stef repeats. How could she have done this? While she had been nursing her frustrations away with alcohol, her wife had been here thinking she wasn't coming back and sobbing.
"Why were you so upset?" Lena asks, looking up into Stef's hazel green eyes.
"Because I don't know if I can be a mother." Stef admits to her wife. "And I don't know if I even want to be one." Lena is silent for a moment as she considers her response.
"Then we don't have to." Lena says.
"But you-" Stef's response is interrupted.
"I would rather have you." Lena says definitively. "I love you, Stephanie Marie Adams Foster."
"I love you, Lena Elizabeth Adams Foster." Stef replies, tipping Lena's face up so that she can brush their lips together. Still holding Lena's face in her hands, Stef presses more passionate kisses to her lips.
"What are you doing?" Lena asks as Stef pushes her back onto the bed and hovers over her.
"Apologizing." Stef answers, trailing her lips down the caramel skinned woman's slender neck. Stef's lips ghost over her wife's throat and collarbone before pulling off her pajama top. Her lips attack Lena's perky breasts, tongue flicking over the nipples and teeth grazing them.
"Stef." Lena moans, tangling her fingers into her short, blonde hair. She could feel a deep need that was emanating from inside Stef; a need to remind Lena of her love for her, to remind her that she would never leave again. The fire inside of the blonde woman blazes as Stef's lips move down Lena's stomach, nipping at the sensitive skin around her belly button, before pausing briefly at the hem of her wife's panties. Grabbing the panties with her teeth, Stef drags them down her wife's legs and tosses them to the floor.
"I love you so much." Stef tells Lena as she lays beside the curly haired woman, her fingers stroking the dark and wet curls between her legs.
"I love you." Lena breathes, her eyes hooded with desire. It was only minutes ago that she wasn't sure her wife would be walking back into their apartment. And now, she was here, about to make love to her. Lena's arms wrap around the blonde woman, holding her close as she gently slips two fingers into her slick pussy. Lena moans into Stef's mouth as their tongues swirl around each other, doing their familiar dance.
"I love you, I love you, I love you." Stef chants like a prayer as she moves her fingers inside her wife, using her lips to press tender kisses to any caramel skin she can reach. She needed Lena to know - to know that she was sorry, to know that she still loved her, to know that she would never leave her again. Lena's pussy is so wet that Stef's fingers slip in and out easily, curling to rub against her g-spot with each thrust. The curly haired woman lets out appreciative grunts and moans as Stef continues her movements.
"Oh, Stef!" Lena gasps as the blonde woman presses her thumb to her sensitive clit. Stef runs circles around the sensitive bundle of nerves as her fingers thrust in and out of Lena's pussy - all while still murmuring her confessions of love for her wife against her smooth and salty skin. "Oh, god, Stef!" Lena's entire body shakes in pleasure as she rakes her fingernails down Stef's strong back.
"I love you, I love you, I love you." Stef whispers against Lena's skin, gently pulling her fingers from her pussy. "I'm so sorry I hurt you."
"Shh, shh, shh." Lena hushes her wife. "I forgive you." Lena says definitively. "We're going to have disagreements and argue. Just promise me you won't walk out again."
"Never." Stef promises.
A/N: Be sure to leave me a review and let me know what you think!
