AN: Finally, a new chapter! Life's been a bit crazy with the new job, but I like it a lot. The company and my colleagues are amazing, and I get to do a lot of fun stuff in Excel (yes, I'm one of those). I love it! On the downside there's the whole Corona-thing, and while I'm personally not afraid to get sick, I take my part in stopping the potential spread very seriously. It means since I'm currently having a slight cough I'm not allowed to do much of anything since I shouldn't meet people. Upside to that; apart from working from home, I won't have much to do the upcoming days but watch Netflix and write. Maybe that means I'll get the next chapter out faster. (Although no promises on that.)
I've sucked at answering reviews with everything going on, but I am going to. Eventually. In the meantime, know that I read every single one (multiple times actually) and that they mean so much to me! There's nothing better than to get a notification about a new review, and hearing what you guys think. I love you all!
PS: Someone asked me some time ago if I'm Scandinavian. The review was unsigned, so I couldn't answer, but yes, I am. Swedish to be precise.
Hermione's mother hugs Kakashi. Which is strange. Then she proceeds to hook her arm into his and drag him with her into the house. Which is plain crazy. Strangers don't usually manhandle Kakashi in such a fashion. Actually, no one manhandles Kakashi. End of story. Getting used to Hermione's tactility took a long time, and her mother is twice the force and none of the familiarity.
Jean, as she introduces herself, chats excitedly about finally getting to meet him and wanting to know all about him. Given the kind of questions she asks, Kakashi gets the feeling she already knows a lot. Given her reactions, she's not very happy with the lengths of his responses. He wonders how impolite it would be to break free and run. He could probably get loose gently, couldn't he? Although her grip is strong, so he can't be too sure. Civilians are frighteningly delicate.
"Mom," Hermione says as she follows them to the kitchen. There's laughter in her voice. "Stop harassing him," Hermione opens the fridge and peers inside. "You don't want him to leave, do you? Then how are you going to satisfy your curiosity?"
"Oh, don't worry," Jean says. "Kakashi doesn't mind, do you?" She turns to him with the last words, and her whole demeanour reminds him so much of Hermione he puts on an unimpressed look and raises an eyebrow without missing a beat. Jean laughs. "I can see why Hermione likes you," she tells him, patting his arm before finally letting him go.
They've barely started making dinner when Hermione's father comes home. His handshake is firm as he introduces himself to Kakashi before moving on to hug his daughter and kiss his wife. Richard's approach is softer than his wife's. The questions he asks is more general, focusing on their trip, meaning Kakashi can leave most of the talking to Hermione. With the buzz in his head it's a gift.
It's not that things haven't gotten better, Kakashi tells himself. They have. It's just that the last few days, as he's been packing up his belongings and said goodbye to one thing after another, he's felt hollowed out. Yesterday morning, as he saw Jón for what he knew would be the last time, they'd talked about it. Because Kakashi knows this trip is nothing but a footnote in the story of his life. It was never meant to be anything else. Only it's grown out of proportion; making Kakashi lose track of what he's going back to, and how things are meant to be once he gets there. It feels like a vacuum, where the insertion has ended and is fading from his mind but reality hasn't caught up yet.
Unreal. That's the word. Everything feels unreal.
Seeing the Grangers work in familiar sync around the kitchen, making dinner and setting the table, doesn't help. Their conversation flows easily between their respective lives, gossip, the latest politics, and news. Kakashi's known Hermione talks to her parents on the phone every now and then, but he never realized she knows as much about their colleagues and friends as they know about hers. It's a long time since Kakashi's dad died, and he hasn't had much experience with every-day family dynamics. He wonders if they're all like the Grangers. If they are, it's not as bad as he expected.
.oOo.
Normalization, Hermione realises as they sit down for dinner, is a powerful process. She hasn't really thought about Kakashi's mask in the longest time. It's become part of his face, not invisible in any way, but normal. Nothing she notices. Not until they're seated in her parents' kitchen, dinner on the table, and he brings out his book.
Like usual, only not.
She has mentioned the mask to her parents. It was just quite some time ago, and maybe she should have prepared them for this. Especially her mother. "So," Hermione says, making sure to pointedly meet her mum's eyes, "what class are you planning to do this term? Will you continue with the salsa?" She turns to Kakashi by her side. "They do one class every term; dancing, arts, cooking, whatever. It's been going on for over a decade."
"We haven't decided yet," Hermione's dad says. She can tell from the way he smiles that he at least got the message. "Bee-keeping maybe, to make something useful with the back yard?"
"Only I think that class will be full of hippies," Jean cuts in, gesturing with her fork. That she continues on the subject is a good thing. "Don't you think casting concrete sounds like my thing though?"
Hermione can't help but laugh. "Seriously? For one, I think you mean hipsters, not hippies; and I doubt there'll be fewer of them in a concrete class."
"Let's not be judgmental honey," Jean winks, "and enough about us. What about you Kakashi, what do you do when you're not working?" Hermione's not sure if she wants to applaud her mum, or hide behind the tablecloth. At least she didn't ask about the mask. Yet.
Kakashi shrugs. "This and that," he says. Hermione takes a strategic bite of pasta to hide her smile. Her mother does deserve it, nosy as she is, and Hermione can tell from Kakashi's tone he's not mocking her in a bad way. "Mostly this," he adds with a straight face when it's clear Jean is waiting for more information.
Across from her, Hermione can see her dad pushing his lips together to not laugh outright. Her mum's eyes are thinning. "You," she points one blue-nailed finger at Kakashi, "are going to be a difficult one, aren't you?" Beside her her husband loses his battle not to laugh and lets out a huff. "Just wait," Jean continues, "I'll drag it out of you eventually."
It's obvious to everyone around the table that, no matter her words, she's enjoying herself. Kakashi's eyes fold into a smile over the top of his book, and Hermione can guess his words before he speaks. "Good luck with that," he says, tone dry but light.
Maybe this is not the time to mention Kakashi's been trained to withstand interrogation, Hermione figures. It can wait a while. "I did warn him about you before we got here, you know," she says instead, smiling at her mother. "It's not like I was going to let him walk in here unprepared."
"Traitor," her mum answers, "I can't believe half your DNA is from me. Maybe they switched babies at the hospital."
"Hn," Kakashi raises an eyebrow and looks from Jean to Hermione and back again. "I wouldn't worry about that."
Shoving him in the shoulder seems like a perfectly valid response.
.oOo.
Kakashi watches the dishes wash themselves. Magically. Like honest-to-God real magic, marching them from the table and to the sink where a sponge is flying around scrubbing them clean. It's giving him a headache. Across the kitchen table Hermione's eyes narrow as she watches him. "Why do it this way?" Kakashi asks before she can say whatever's on her mind. "Aren't there spells that can do it in one go?"
"There is, in a way," Hermione runs a hand over her head, pulling her hair back, "only they're not exact enough for everyday use." She leaves her arm up, her fingers massaging the base of her skull. "I could use a spell to take away all dirt on this floor, for example, and it'd look good. But if I kept using that same spell, I'd either end with a floor that was slowly building up grime, or a floor that was losing its varnish."
In the living room, the tv is turned on. Kakashi puts his arm on the table and props his head up on the hand. It's been a long day. "So," he says, interested despite the slowness of his thoughts, "it'd either be too strong or too weak, and you couldn't tell." Hermione nods. "Is it possible to practice magical control in order to get it balanced?"
Hermione takes her hand down and cocks her head. "Hm," she says, "I actually don't know. I'll have to look into that. I wonder if…"
There's a spark in her voice, Kakashi notices, and infectious energy that makes the corners of his lips tick upwards. He can't make himself follow the details of her longwinded reasoning, is too tired for that, but he knows it's more about her sorting through her thoughts than wanting an answer anyway. She'll forgive him.
Hermione's parents are watching a gameshow as they join them in the living room, dishes done. It involves music and a complicated set of rules Kakashi can't follow. Not that he's very interested. He doesn't know the songs, or the participants, and he has absolutely no idea what the little videos are meant to tell him. The Grangers are guessing answers, commenting and laughing, and Kakashi would have thought he'd feel left out, but he doesn't. Maybe it's got something to do with the steady presence of Hermione next to him on the couch, occasionally explaining things; or it's the simple relief in the fact that while they're watching whatever this is, he not expected to contribute to the discussion.
"By the way Mio," Hermione's father says in a commercial break, "do you want to do something special on Thursday?"
"Not really," Hermione answers, and Kakashi spares a thought to wonder why Thursday is different from any other day. "Maybe we could go to that new Indian place down by the park?" Suspicion slides like oil through Kakashi, and he turns his head to watch Hermione. "It's hardly a big deal, it's not like I'm turning 30."
Kakashi clears his throat. When Hermione turns around, he raises an eyebrow, making sure to tip his head in question. "Something you want to tell me?" Keeping his voice smooth and a too wide grin firmly plastered across his features, Kakashi blinks slowly. Hermione does an excellent impersonation of a small animal in front of a predator. It almost – but only almost, because he's an Anbu and trained better than that – makes Kakashi's mouth relax into an actual smile.
"I did, didn't I?" Hermione ducks behind her drawn up knees before peeking back out. "I didn't?" When Kakashi doesn't move to answer, she continues. "I'm sorry, I meant to tell you. It's my birthday, obviously, but it's not like I care, and I don't want anything, so it doesn't really matter?" Sakura had said the same thing once, and unfortunately her teammates had listened. It had not been a good day. Birthdays might not mean anything to Kakashi, and he's always preferred the ones that slip by unnoticed, but he should have known Hermione would not see it like that. He should have asked.
"In my defence," Hermione continues, bumping her shoulder against his – and clearly, his scary face doesn't work as well on her as it used to – "we haven't really talked about it. For all I know your birthday came and went and you never said anything."
Nope. Kakashi's not touching that. Not even with a stick. Escape and evade. "I don't see how that matters," he says instead. "I don't celebrate, you do."
"I don't," Hermione tries, "it's only dinner."
Before Kakashi can do more than lift an eyebrow Jean cuts in. "And breakfast at bed," she says, a smile on her face and a glint in her eyes that Kakashi recognizes all too well from Hermione. "And cake."
When Hermione turns around towards her mother, Kakashi allows himself an upwards twitch of his lips. It's only been hours since he got here, and Kakashi can't say the awkwardness has gone away, but it's diminished. The Granger home holds an easy warmth that sneaks up on him, in a way that he hasn't felt for the longest time. Obito and him had been invited to dinner with Rin's family once, long ago, and there'd been that one time with Sakura's parents, but they'd been… different. Here, he's not the prodigal son of the White Fang, nor Kakashi no sharingan, or anybody's sensei and team leader; he's just Kakashi. And as just Kakashi it's easy to meet Richard's eyes over the head of his daughter and share a smile at her scandalized tone as she speaks to her mother.
"Mum!" Hermione says. "You're not helping." Despite seeing only the back of her head, Kakashi can tell she's not seriously upset.
"Well," Jean answers, "it's not my fault you forgot to tell him."
Hermione groans, and Kakashi quickly schools his expression as she turns back around. The slant of Hermione's eyes makes him believe she's seeing right through him either way. That's alright, not at all a blow to his confidence in his undercover skills.
"Anyway," Hermione tells him, "I don't expect any special treatment, nor do I want gifts, so don't worry. Like I said; I meant to tell you, but you know." She shrugs, and Kakashi does know, doesn't he? He allows an upwards twitch of his eyebrows and a small hum. "Your turn," Hermione continues.
Uh-oh. Not good. Retreat. He's supposed to be having the leverage in this conversation. This subject already came and went. "My turn what?" he asks.
"When's your birthday?" Hermione clarifies. She turns her head slightly to the side and narrow her eyes. "Did you let me miss it?"
"Maa," Kakashi stalls. He has no intention to answer. Nope. No death wish here. "It came and went." He shrugs. "I don't really keep track." Which is true, although he's also aware of the date he was born, and well…
"If you don't tell me," Hermione says smoothly – and Kakashi can swear she's picked up that tone from him, "I'll let all my friends know you only feel welcomed if people hug you, but that you're really shy about it, so you'll protest just for form's sake."
Anbu training comes in handy at the most varying times. "Do you want them to get injured?" Kakashi asks, making sure to lock down all outward reaction. Hermione merely smiles at him, and for a second Kakashi longs for the time when she was easier to intimidate.
"You wouldn't," Hermione tells him. "Now, just spit it out already. It's not today, is it?" When there's no immediate answer she pressed again. "It is?" Behind her Kakashi catches Jean and Richard sharing a look and trying to look indifferent.
Another thing Kakashi's learnt from his years of active duty is to recognize a fight he's losing, and there's no backup to be had here. "No," he says. "Yesterday, but…"
Turns out that the theory about it being the worst possible answer might be true, given the way Hermione's high-pitched protest cuts him off. Kakashi's pretty sure that the only thing keeping Hermione from attacking him is her parents, laughing at them in the background.
This is a disaster. And one that clearly is about to get worse since Hermione rapidly starts planning for celebrations and baking cakes and what not. As if the concept of Kakashi not celebrating is too foreign to understand. A fact that is not made better after he accidently mentions he hasn't done so since he was five. Kakashi wants to bash his head against the coffee table, only it looks delicate and easy to break.
To reign Hermione back in and make her promise to not go through with any of her crazy plans is a feat. It leaves Kakashi more than exhausted. Duty demands he stay in the living room until nine o'clock at least, but as soon as it's socially acceptable Kakashi means to make his excuses. By now, Kakashi swears this day has been going on for at least a week.
.oOo.
Sleeping is impossible. The house is too loud. The room too quiet. Even the air Kakashi breaths is wrong. It's permeated by some kind of artificial flowery scent that's supposed to make the sheets feel fresh or some nonsense like that, but that only serves as a constant reminder that this is an unfamiliar environment. Behind the chemicals is a softer smell of old paper and dusty carpeting, and Kakashi guesses that this home-office-slash-guestroom doesn't see much use.
Having made his leave over an hour ago, Kakashi should be asleep by now. Instead he lies staring at the ceiling, trying to ignore the soft-spoken voices of Hermione's parents in the room next door, the ticking of the clock in the hallway, and the way he can sprawl out unhindered.
It's not supposed to be a bad thing; the way he can sprawl.
Kakashi doesn't sigh, but he breath out, slow and deliberate. The empty space next to him somehow manages to be more compact than Hermione's ever been. It's like a singularity rests there, bending the gravity around it and making Kakashi's ribs ache. He breathes in again and closes his eyes. This is how it's supposed to be; how it will inevitably be, soon enough. Relatively speaking, he's slept alone all his life, he shouldn't be anything but relieved to have space for himself again.
In ten days, he'll be leaving. He might as well kick this stupid habit now. Not to mention the fact that friends are supposed to keep to their respective beds. Jean had simply ushered Kakashi and his belongings into the guestroom, and that had been that. No one but him and Hermione knows about their regular sleeping arrangements. It's not an outspoken agreement, but it's always been obvious. The Icelanders might have been gossiping, but that had been the easier answers to a rather complicated truth and not worth correcting. Here, living under the same roof as Hermione's parents, it's different. Because Richard and Jean thinking they're a couple would come with expectations and complications, and would force them to walk a narrow path between the truth and things Kakashi can't imagine either of them wanting to share.
Only, in ten days, he'll be leaving. And Hermione will be gone. And he'll be on his own either way. And all of this will fade into the strange disconnected dreamscape it's already started to resemble.
When he thinks about it however, Kakashi might need to go to the bathroom. Which is on the other side of Hermione's room. Hermione; who came upstairs not long ago with her parents, and who might still be up. So, if he needed to go to the bathroom, and if the lights were on in her room, it would only be natural to knock, wouldn't it? At that point, if she offered, it'd be awfully impolite to turn her down. He's a ninja after all; if he wants to go unseen, he does know how.
The more he thinks about it, the more he needs to pee, and it's certainly stupid to lie awake because he can't make himself go to the bathroom. No. He can't let that keep him from sleeping.
