Alice
"What do you expect me to do Jasper, just leave my sister here? You can just forget about that!" I snap, folding my arms and leveling Jasper with a deadly glare.
Jasper leans on the vending machine, his hands shoved into his pockets and sneer twisting his expression. He glares over to me with equal intensity and takes a deep breath. "Babe," he emphasizes, "Forgetting about Bella is something I don't intend to do, and the last thing I'd ever ask you to do. Just listen to what I'm saying. You've been at the hospital all day with nothing to eat, zero chance to sleep, not a single break, and we have to think of Rosalie, too. Bella is fine. We've already made the nurses and every other staff member here aware of Emmett. He can't be our top priority right now. Not when the rest of our loved ones are in equal crisis."
I huff, ignoring the twist of understanding in my gut and turning away from him. "No, listen to me. My concern is making sure Bella is safe, and making sure it stays that way!" I stand up and walk over to him, jabbing an accusatory finger his way. The guilt vanishes as quickly as it makes an appearance as I remember all that Bella has suffered through. "Have you seen the bruises on her arms and legs, Babe? Just stop trying to convince me to leave her here unsupported. You'll have to abandon her without me. What's your problem, anyway? You just said to me on the plane that you were equally, if not more concerned about Bella's safety as I was, and still am." I stand tall, uncaring to the fact he towers over my smaller figure. I completely refuse to let him dictate this decision. Bella needs someone to help her, and I'd rather die than make the mistake of turning away from her twice.
Jasper throws his arms into the air, walking away from their argument in what I can only view as an act of cowardice. "Great, so now I'm the husband that doesn't care!"
"Do not put words in my mouth, Jasper. Do not make me out to be the bad guy." I follow him, my arm flinging out beside me in an expression of my frustration and hurt. This is about Bella, not his feelings, and he shouldn't be confusing the two separate topics.
"No, no, keep it going. I'd love to hear more about how unsupportive I am. It's not like I just flew halfway across America to make sure your family was safe...and I guess I didn't commit a felony by kicking a man's door down either—" Jasper's on the verge of shouting, each of his words crashing down upon me like a ton of bricks. The guilt I'd previously buried inside surges to the surface, making me instantly regret all of the harsh accusations I had flung at him.
"Jasper that's not what I meant!" I scream, violently stomping my foot on the ground, huffing with the effort of my raw emotion. His eyes widen, face as pale as if he was looking upon a ghost. I lift my arms in surrender to his hurt gaze, trembling. "I'm sorry...I didn't mean..." I breathe shakily. "I just...I can't bear to lose anyone else..." Tears begin to welling in my eyes. I can't make them stop, no matter how much I swallow and forcefully will them away. Suddenly, I feel Jaspers arms wrap around my shoulders, pulling me into his chest. I feel as if I can breathe once more, and he kisses my head tenderly.
"Hey, hey," He soothes, "What's going on?" I try to regain what little control I have over my emotions, but I my attempt are fruitless. The guilt gnaws at me, as does the heavy burden that now rests upon my heart.
"You don't know what she's been through Jasper..." I choke, clinging onto him as if my very life depends on his hold. I am soaking his shirt through with tears, and it only adds to the guilt that suffocates me. "...I have to be here. I have to stay. Just like I should've stayed for our son," I confess.
Jasper's grasp begins to loosen, and I can feel his heart rate pick up. "W-what?" he questions hesitantly.
I wipe my eyes "I'm sorry, I know you don't like to talk about it Jazz, but I have to be here. Just...please. Please, I know your j-just trying to help, but I can't...I can't lea-" I choke, more tears streaming down my face and onto his chest.
"Shh, it's okay..." He comforts, worry palpable in his voice. "Listen, don't worry about it. I'll go get Rosalie and Charlotte and I'll bring them to our cabin. I'm...I'm sorry, Alice." He extricates himself from me, beginning to back away.
What just happened, I think deliriously. For a moment I truly believed he would comfort me, open up to me about our child. Instead, turned around as quickly as he could, hightailing it out of the cafeteria. He always does that. Every single time I bring up the tragic subject, he acts as if I should be sorry for reminding him and then walks away. He always leaves when I need him the most.
I wipe my tears and return to Bella's room. Once I get inside, I see a nurse checking her vitals. I clear my throat to let her know of my presence. Bella's good eye catches me first, and I muster up a smile, wiping all Jasper troubles from my mind and zeroing in on my family in need. "Hey, how ya doing?" I gently inquire.
The nurse politely excuses herself and I take the applesauce she had been feeding Bella, continued the slow process of nourishing her. She shifts in her seat awkwardly. I wink to let her know she's safe. She takes a bite and without preamble, I crawl into the bed alongside her, finding her hand to squeeze in reassurance. We sit in somber silence for a few moments until I gather up the courage to speak.
"So, the doctor said you have minor injuries. The good news is you can come home today." It takes all I have to resist the urge to allow my gaze to naturally drop to her black swollen eye.
"...The bad news." she wonders, looking out the hospital window.
I focus my attention on my hands, which were fisted my skirt. "How about we hold off on that?"
"Alice." Bella warns sharply, no other words necessary.
"I can't right now Bella. This is all new, and all too much." I reason, hoping that she chooses to drop the subject.
Bella is more stubborn than that. She stiffens beside me. "I'm not a baby, Alice. I can take it." Bella says determinedly.
"I said no." I reinforce.
Realization dawns on Bella's features. Her expression hardens. "You want me to write a police report...don't you?" she flinches at her own words.
I shake my head. "We're are not going to have this conversation right now, Bella." I reach for her hand, but she jerks away.
"I'm not going to do it." Bella swallows, watching me with caution.
"There's no other option!" I burst, the pent up emotion of Jasper's cowardly escape prompting me to argue my point, even though I'd previously told her I wasn't participating in the conversation. I couldn't help myself. Bella was refusing to accept reality.
"I'm not going to press any charges or anything else everyone wants me to do. It's not like I'm going back. I'm not letting anyone force me to take legal action." Bella snarls, stubborn in her decision.
"Not going back, huh? Oh let's see Bella, like the last time? Listen, this isn't up for debate. Whether you like it or not, I'm going to make sure he get what he deserves. His ass belongs behind bars, and I don't know about you, but I sure as hell am not in the mood for another pity-party speech. Oh, poor Emmett, an overworked employee whose been abused his whole life, his only option is to beat his anger out on his girlfriend to make himself feel more powerful, fuck that-"
"People make mistakes!" Bella chokes.
"And some mistakes are unforgivable. Enough is enough." I shake my head and the room falls silent. "Dammit, Bella, I fucking love you, we love you. Don't you see that?"
She shoots up in her bed. "The only thing I see is someone who's butting into a situation they have no business in."
"How can you say that?" I scream. "You called me for help!"
"I DIDN'T CALL YOU TO RUIN MY LIFE WHICH IS WHAT YOU'RE DOING! I said I'm done with it!" her voice collapses, before strengthening full force. "THAT MEANS I DON'T WANT TO SEE HIM AGAIN! I DON'T WANT TO BE PUT IN POSITION WHERE I'M CONSTANTLY REMINDED OF ANOTHER PUNCH, ANOTHER KICK, ANOTHER SPIT IN MY FACE! YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT THAT FEELS LIKE!" She explodes into heavy sobs, tears streaming down her face.
I rush over to her, fiercely wrapping my arms around her. She tries to fight me off, but the more she resists the tighter I hold. "I may not understand everything you've gone through, but I know what it feels like to be helpless. Like something so special was taken from you, like no matter how hard you scream, or fight the pain just won't go away. Hell, may never go away! Never do I ever want you to feel alone, or like no one cares! I do! I'm not trying to ruin your life Bella...!" I cradle her face and force her to look at me. "I'm doing this because I feel helpless too. I had every chance to help bring you out of this for the past four years and I sat back, because I didn't know how! Do you know how hard it was to keep a secret like this from our family?! You put this amount of burden on me! I couldn't eat! I couldn't sleep! I lost my-" I stopped myself and placed my hand over my mouth. Bella removed it.
"What Alice? What did you lose?" she questions, and my swallow echoes in the silence.
"Nothing..." I breath, knowing she won't buy it. "Oh God..."
"Alice...Alice...talk to me. Look, I'm sorry I yelled I'm just…"
"S'okay" I stop her. "It's okay"
"Mrs. Hale!" A nurse calls, running into the room.
I take a deep breath. "I'm okay! I'm sorry, we're just um...talking. I'm sorry. Everything is okay"
The nurse glances over at Bella who nods towards her. The nurse hesitantly leaves them alone. I don't realize I am standing still daydreaming out the door until Bella grabs my hand "Alice..? Can you hear me? Breathe." I take another slow deep breath and nod to assure Bella that I'm alright. "Listen, we don't have to talk about it now. I didn't realize how much I had put on you...please...forgive me."
I hold her hand in mine and shake my head "That's fine. I...I wouldn't have it any other way. I'm glad you trusted me with this burden, even if it hurts."
Yeah…
It's fine…
"Hey...where's Jasper?" Bella asks, intending to cheer me up.
"Um..," I start, trying to clear my throat and find the right words. "He went to go get Rosalie and Charlotte."
Bella releases my arm and continues to stare at me as if I spoke in another language. "What do you mean? Is she here?"
I roll my eyes. "Yes, Bella she is." Bella stays silent. "He's bringing her over to our house"
"Wait, what?"
"Bella listen, Rosalie has been through a lot..."
"What does that bobblehead know about struggle-" Bella complains, rubbing her head at all the mounting frustrations.
"Rosalie is divorcing Edward!" I confess, figuring it's now or never. The words escape me before I can really think it through. Bella's eyes furrow in confusion.
"Wait...I'm sorry, what?" she blinks, uncomprehending.
"There's a lot that you've missed since you've been away, Bella. Things aren't what they use to be or appear to be."
Bella continues to gaze steadily at me as if she was waiting for me to call out "psyche!" Oh, how I wish it was all a prank. "Wait so...Edward. He was here, I saw him."
"Yeah, we kind of told him." I admit sheepishly.
"Wait you did what?" She exclaims.
I roll my eyes "Must you always get insulted when someone wants to help you?" I pout, trying to lighten the atmosphere.
Bella bites her lip, hands quivering with worry. "Please, just tell me he didn't get hurt!"
"Hurt? Bella he beat the shit out of Emmett I think that's the last thing you need to worry about!" I rush to reassure, laughing a bit at the memory.
"Ugh." She groans, burying her face into her open palms "No, this is all too much..."
"Agreed; so, I think it's safe to say we should just call it a day. Let's just get you home. Okay? Please, Bella we'll take good care of you." I swear, hope and sincerity shining through my impassioned speech.
"As long as I don't have to go to mom's," Bella cracks a smile, chuckling weakly.
I can't help but smile as well. I'm glad to have glimpsed the Isabella I used to know. "C'mon, they're not so bad!" I argue unconvincingly.
"I just can't face them right now." Bella explains softly.
"Well...when the time comes. You won't have to."
I promise...
Hope you guys enjoyed! Don't forget to leave a comment, and favorite this story:)
