Virmire was as close to hell as Bex had ever been. A gorgeous paradise, its beauty had been marred, like so many things, by Saren. Not that she or her crew had thought a trip to Virmire would be a holiday, but fighting geth and artificially-created krogan on once-pristine beaches just felt wrong. They should have been somewhere dirty and rundown, not warm and sunny.

But it wasn't just the location Saren had ruined. In one day, Bex had nearly lost her two best friends—Wrex still wasn't talking to her and Kaidan was laid up in the Normandy's med-bay for the foreseeable future—and had relived one of the most terrifying moments of her childhood. Even two days later, she could still feel Saren's grip on her throat.

As if that hadn't been bad enough, now the Normandy and her crew were grounded until further notice, courtesy of Ambassador Twatwaffle.

Bex wandered aimlessly through the wards of the Citadel, oblivious of everyone and everything around her. She desperately wanted a drink or twenty, but she knew she had to keep a clear head, even if she had no idea what to do.

And after her last run-in with Udina, Hackett had made her promise not to take out her frustrations on his punching bag unless she had someone with her to keep her from going too far. Though Dr. Chakwas had assured her there was no permanent damage done, her knuckles still ached from time to time. Punching Saren in the face certainly hadn't helped, nor had it hurt the bastard at all.

Her omni-tool pinged with a message and she was surprised but relieved to see it was from Wrex.

Flux. We need to talk. -UW


The atmosphere in Flux was unusually subdued. A number of the Normandy crew were scattered among the usual crowd, but few were talking or laughing or dancing. It felt more like a wake than a Friday night.

Wrex sat in a back corner, a bottle of ryncol and two glasses arranged on the table in front of him.

Bex raised an eyebrow as she sat across from him. "You tryin' to kill me, old man?"

He grunted, something that might have been a laugh, might have been annoyance. "If I wanted to kill you, you'd be dead." He pulled up the drinks menu. "But if you want something else—"

Bex shook her head. "No, no. I'm game. I think. Just… cautious, I suppose."

"About damn time."

She rolled her eyes but said nothing. He wasn't wrong. And Zaeed wasn't wrong either. She knew that, always had done, but it had never stopped her from still picturing Wrex as the giant armored teddy bear who'd first saved her scared, scrawny six-year-old butt from Vido.

Wrex poured a drink and shoved it across the table. "Drink. Then we'll talk."

"That seems counterproductive, in my case, but I won't say no to a drink." Bex picked up her glass and half-saluted Wrex. "Been needing this for too long."

She'd heard about the effects ryncol had on non-krogans, and how it felt on the way down—even worse coming back up. But it wasn't the feeling of chewing broken glass that stood out to her. It was the fact that she already felt drunk after one drink. She usually had to down a bottle and a half of asari whiskey, the expensive shit, before she came close to feeling it.

"Holy fuckballs." She shook her head in an attempt to clear it, and immediately regretted it. She was glad they were in a booth; otherwise, she'd have spilled out of her seat onto the floor in a second.

"Heh." Wrex slammed his glass down, the table shaking but the ryncol bottle not moving an inch. "Now that's the good shit."

Bex waved away the offer of a second drink. She could barely string a thought or sentence together as it was. Any more ryncol and she didn't think she'd even be conscious.

Wrex downed another glassful before he set the bottle aside and seemed to finally remember why they were there.

"I won't apologize for wanting to save my people," he said, his voice somehow even more gravelly than usual. "But I suppose I shouldn't have jumped down your throat immediately."

"You panicked."

"Guess I was running on instinct, fight for survival, that kinda shit."

"Understandable."

"Didn't see you as someone who had a good head on their shoulders. Just saw you as an obstacle, a very small one, standing in the way of krogan glory."

"No, I get it," Bex said after she'd sat chewing on her words for a few minutes. "I'm not krogan." She said the next words carefully, watching his reaction. "We are friends, comrades in arms, but there was no way for you to know if that extended to me caring about the fate of all krogan."

"Still not sure," Wrex grunted.

"Fair enough."

"But I do know you were right about those krogan on Virmire," he said gravely. "They were not my brothers. They were… false. Not true krogan."

"Not anything I want to run into again, that's for goddamn sure."

"Heh."

"For my part…" Bex sighed, unsure what she really wanted or needed to say.

"It's not complicated," Wrex said when she failed to find her own words. "You saw a threat, not just to your mission, but to the rest of the galaxy, and you stood by your decision to take out that threat, personal safety be damned."

She gawked at him a minute before she nodded. "Yeah. That."

"You know I wouldn't have hesitated, right?" Wrex said. "When it started, I didn't see a way one or both of us didn't wind up dead."

Bex scoffed. "Oh please. As if my shotgun could have done anything to your tough old hide. But also, same. I wouldn't have liked it, but if I'd had to, I'd have done it." She hesitated before she held out a fist across the table. "Are we good?"

Wrex seemed to consider something for a moment before he nodded once and gently tapped his fist against hers.

There was no doubt he'd regard her with just as much caution as she now did him. She was not looking forward to the 'I told you so's that would undoubtedly be coming from both Zaeed and Hackett.


"Oh there you are."

Bex looked up, her vision swimming a bit after toasting Wrex, this time with her usual asari whiskey. "Captain Anderson?"

Through the drunken haze, she could see Anderson pinch the bridge of his nose and start counting. "I really wish you weren't drunk right now, Shepard. But there's no time to sober you up first."

Bex blinked. "What's up?"

"I think I've come up with a plan to override the lockdown and get you on your way."

"That so?" She shifted in her seat, enough room for Anderson to sit, but he remained standing.

He seemed to eye Wrex with some suspicion before he finally sat down and leaned in close, though there wasn't a soul within fifty feet of the booth.

"I know of two ways to gain access to the override," he said, his voice barely above a whisper. "I can either break into C-Sec and hack one of their computers or I can break into Udina's office and override from there."

"Both of those sound incredibly dangerous," Bex said. "You could lose everything."

"Lose what exactly? My career?" Anderson shook his head. "Udina already killed that."

"I…" Bex sighed. "If this is what you want, I won't stop you. But…"

"There's no but, Shepard. You have to get out of here, go after Saren. Do what no one else can."

"He's right, kid," Wrex said. "You're the only one who can stop Saren."

Of course they were right, but Bex didn't want Anderson to get hurt. Still, he could take care of himself, and he definitely had unfinished business with Udina.

"Go for Udina's office," she said. "Punch the bastard's lights out while you're at it."

Anderson chuckled. "Oh I intend to."


Bex leaned against Joker's chair as they watched the monitor for a sign that the lockdown had been lifted. Tense minutes went by before the panel turned green and they both let out a sigh of relief.

"You should be good to go," Anderson said over Bex's personal comm. "Good luck and Godspeed."

"How'd it feel, punching the bastard?" Bex asked, curiosity getting the better of her.

"I'll buy you a drink and tell you all about it when Saren's dead. Anderson out."

As Anderson disconnected, Bex heaved a sigh and switched to shipwide communication. "Attention all hands. Once we leave the dock, the Normandy will be officially stolen. If you aren't comfortable with that—and I won't hold it against you if you aren't—you have about two minutes to get to the airlock. Otherwise, we're in it 'til the end. Shepard out."

"Nobody's leaving," Joker said as Bex walked away. "It may not have been what you meant, but we are all in it 'til the end. We're all just as much with you right now as the day you took command."

Bex nodded. "Thanks for that, Joker. I'll be in my quarters. As usual, leave me alone unless there's an emergency." She turned to glare at him. "And the Council trying to yell at me doesn't fucking count as an emergency."

Joker put a hand on his heart. "I am hurt, Commander, that you would think I would ever want to inflict the Council on you."

Bex snorted a laugh and waved as she walked toward the CIC. "Good night, Joker."

She wasn't at all surprised when her omni-tool pinged with a message from Hackett before she'd even hit the stairs.

Given the current uproar on the Citadel, whether it was your doing or not, I don't think it's safe for us to talk right now. But whatever happens, please come home alive. I love you. Steven

It was for the best, really, that she couldn't spend the long journey to the Mu Relay talking to him—she needed sleep and had a battle to plan for, however the fuck she was supposed to plan for something that was just one big ass question mark.

She tried both sleeping and planning without success and eventually found herself in the mess, where everyone else had already gathered, except Kaidan, still confined to the med-bay.

"Wondered if we'd see you here, Skipper," Ashley said, handing Bex a mug of coffee.

She nodded her thanks. "I couldn't sleep. This whole thing is just… so fucked up."

"Do you have a plan?" Garrus asked.

Bex shrugged. "Kill Saren is as far as I've got."

"Good plan."

She turned to Liara. "Know anything about Ilos?"

"I have spent most of my life studying the Protheans," Liara said, "but Ilos is almost entirely a mystery to me."

"Staying at square one then." Bex sighed. "We've got a long journey ahead of us and we don't know how it might end. So take some time for yourselves, get some sleep, just… be ready when Joker says we've hit the relay."

She watched and waited until everyone had gone before she slipped into the medbay. The lights were dimmed but Kaidan was awake, reading a data pad.

"That's bad for your eyes," she said as she appraoched, smirking when he jumped.

"Good thing we're in a med-bay," he groused, "because you almost gave me a damn heart attack!"

"You are so bloody dramatic. You're fine."

"Am I?"

Bex sobered. "I don't know. Are you?" She sat cross-legged on the bed beside his. "Will I have to leave my best friend behind when I walk back into hell?"

The sight of him being tossed around like a ragdoll by Saren had flashed across her mind more than a few times over the last two days.

"No, you will not," Dr. Chakwas said, walking out of her office. "Lt. Alenko has healed nicely. A few more hours' rest and he'll be right as rain as far as I'm concerned."

"Good."

"How about you, Commander?" She eyed Bex critically. "Are you fit for battle? I heard from a reliable source—"

"Dammit, Anderson," Bex muttered under her breath.

"—that you had drinks with Wrex."

"And?"

"And that said drinks were ryncol." Chakwas sighed as she gave Bex an impromptu scan with her omni-tool. "You are aware that you are not part krogan?"

"We don't know that," Bex retorted half-heartedly. "Don't remember my mum. She could have been krogan."

Chakwas shook her head with another sigh. "There doesn't seem to be any permanent damage done, though I doubt your liver will thank you. Please, try to get some rest while you still can."

"I'm a biotic, doc. One thing we do well is hold our liquor. And one thing we don't do is sleep well."

"I can confirm both of those are true," Kaidan said.

"In case you two clowns have forgotten," Chakwas said, more exasperated than anything, "I am a doctor. I can and will give both of you sleeping pills if necessary. You both need sleep. We have no idea what will happen when we get to Ilos, so you must be prepared for anything."

Bex held up a hand. "I'll pass on the pills, thanks. They won't have an effect on me anyway. It's like alcohol: have to drink too much to feel its effects at all."

"And you, Lieutenant?"

Kaidan shook his head. "I'm fine. I may not sleep, but I'll rest."

"Very well. Please, rest. No reports, no strategy. Just rest."

Bex knew damn well she would not rest, though she didn't say it to Dr. Chakwas. She couldn't rest until this was over and Saren was defeated once and for all.