Hey everyone! I hope you are staying safe in these trying times. It's a crazy world we live in. I've been in my house for a week and it feels like months. How are you guys coping?
Ok, so when you start reading this, you'll think it's a completely different story, but bear with me, I have my plans. This takes quite a big jump forward in time.
1 Year Later…
Maddie stands in front of the snack table, feeling like she is in a dream. It's been a while but she still rubs her eyes for them to adjust. There's a choice between pretzels, pickled onions, cheese cubes and pieces of dried fruit. Seems limited but it's more than she's ever had to choose from these past few years.
Her fingers graze the bowl of pretzels before she picks one up, popping it into her mouth. She closes her eyes to taste it better.
The air around her is warm. All the other people keep their voices low, except from a few who are already too tipsy to be quiet. Speaking of tipsy…
Her eyes lock on the bottle of beer near the pretzels and she grabs it, appreciating how the glass is cold to the touch. Without being discreet, she brings it down hard against the edge of the table, making the cap fly off.
The guy next to her gives her a weird look, to which she responds by shrugging, "Sorry."
The music here sounds like jazz on a piano. No lyrics, making it the perfect background music. It's just that Maddie doesn't know what it's a background for.
"Enjoying yourself, darlin'?"
She smirks slightly, finding humour in his perfect timing. Her eyes look up to see Negan standing before her, one hand in his jeans pocket, the other rubbing the bottom of his stubble chin.
Maddie takes a swing of her beer, knowing it makes him uncomfortable to wait for a reply. When she is ready, she answers, "I've been to better parties."
His smile widens as he takes a step closer, grabbing his own bottle of beer off the table, "Always so hard to please."
She hasn't seen him in a while.
They don't even live under the same roof, so it's difficult to read each other, especially her.
Maddie purses her lips, tapping the top of the bottle against her lips as her eyes scan the room. You'd think that living in such a small community would bring everyone closer together, but she never felt more distant. She knows everybody's names, but there was hardly ever a moment for them to move past the acquaintance phase.
The only person she truly knows here is Negan.
He looks at her, sighing, "Not quite the same, is it?"
"What?"
"This," he gestures to the room, "There's food, there is booze, and there are fucking assholes. But it doesn't live up to the parties we used to have."
Maddie smirks, "To be honest, I'm only here for the booze."
"That's my girl."
She bites her lip before taking another swing of her drink.
Negan clears his throat, "How have you been, doll?"
"Good," she nods, "Better."
"Well, I am real fucking glad to hear that, darlin'."
She grins at him. His colourful vocabulary came back to him recently. And that's how she could tell he was in a better place. It's good that they are both moving on from the bullshit and the drama they've had in the past year.
Maddie gasps when he takes the bottle out of her hand and places it back on the table along with his, "Hey, what the hell?"
"Come on," he smirks, "Let's dance."
"Dance? I don't dance," she says, but he has already pulled her into the middle of the room, where a few other couples are swaying to the jazz.
Negan grabs her waist and presses her against him. The closest they have been for a while. She takes a deep breath and mirrors what the other people are doing. Her hand slides up to his shoulders, and he takes her other hand in his.
She looks down at his chest before finally finding the confidence to glance up at him. Good job this isn't awkward.
They sway together in silence, listening to music that might as well be something out of the World War II period. Her palms start to sweat and she prays to God that he doesn't notice.
"You look gorgeous, by the way," he murmurs against her temple. She feels his stubble graze her skin and all she wants to do is lean forward.
Maddie glances down at her black dress. It's nothing special. It just goes down to her knees, "I borrowed it from Megan. I had nothing else to wear."
"Well, I've never seen you in a goddamn dress, so you can be quite fucking positive that I would love anything you put on, darlin'."
She chuckles softly, trying to change the subject, "Isn't your girlfriend supposed to be here, by the way?"
"She doesn't like gatherings like this," Negan watches her, "And now I know why."
Maddie smiles, catching a glimpse of their leader by the door. Helen stands with her arms folded, looking over everyone in the room. They lock eyes for a moment before she turns her head away again. She is a good leader. She is the one who organised this whole thing. Anything to make it feel like the old days again.
They've only spoken briefly when Negan and Maddie found this village. And then again once they've settled down. She has nothing bad to say about her.
"She trusted you to come here by yourself?" Maddie jokes, feeling a train of wind against her ear when he smiles.
"No, but I can be persuasive," Maddie swears that she feels his hand apply pressure on her hip once he says that.
She holds onto his black suit jacket as they move, "You better watch yourself."
"What am I doing wrong?" he pulls his head back to look into her eyes, the grin never leaving his face, "Aren't I allowed to dance with my friend?"
"Nobody else is dancing with their friends. They are all in a couple."
"Maybe I'm not like everybody else," he says.
"No, definitely not."
Negan laughs softly before resting his chin on the top of her head.
Maddie is the first to say that she is leaving, and to no surprise, Negan offers to walk her home. She knows what is on his mind, but has no power to reject him. It's only a walk home. What could happen?
He notices how she wraps her arms around herself outside, being stubborn enough to deny the fact that she is cold.
"Here, put this on," he grabs his jacket.
"No, I'm fine. You don't have to… ugh, fine."
She slides her arms into the warm sleeves as he holds the jacket out for her. She sees that he is wearing a white, button down shirt underneath and fuck, does it look good on him.
They walk in silence along the road, the only noise around them being crickets and the tapping of her heels. It's pitch black, but the lights from other people's homes are enough to illuminate the road.
Maddie wraps the jacket around herself tighter, inhaling the scent of tobacco and cologne that has soaked through the garment.
"It's been really good seein' you, darlin'."
"What are you talking about?" she smiles, "You see me every day. You live a block away."
Negan walks with his hands in his pockets, looking at his shoes, "Yeah, but we never fucking talk. I miss talking to you."
Maddie nods, "Yeah, I know."
"Sometimes I wish it was just the two of us again," he sighs.
"Don't let Stella hear you say that," Maddie smirks.
"Stella wouldn't give a shit."
She bites her lip, curiosity getting the better of her, "Oh? I didn't know you guys were having problems."
Negan smiles slightly, "No, we're not… it's complicated."
"You don't have to tell me," she says, "Your relationship is none of my business."
"It's barely a fucking relationship."
As bad as it is to admit it, something inside her lights up when he says that. And that's not to say she hates Stella. No, it's the total opposite. She has so much respect for her. She has always been understanding and kind, but never took any bullshit from anyone. If anything, Maddie guesses that Stella is the one who wears the pants in the relationship.
"Well, we're here," Maddie stops at the front of her house. The good thing about this community is that there are more properties here than people. And Helen, the leader, let her choose where she wanted to live.
"Shit. Yeah…" Negan scratches his brow, as if he hasn't managed to say everything that he wanted to say.
Maddie purses her lips and walks up the stairs to the porch, opening the door to her house. She steps in and they stand there for a while, before Maddie gasps, "Oh! Sorry," she slides Negan's suit jacket off her shoulders, handing it back to him, "Thank you."
He grins at her, throwing it over his shoulder, "Not a problem, doll."
Maddie nods, waiting for him to leave. But he doesn't. That's awkward.
"Aren't you gonna invite me in for a cup of coffee?" he smirks, running his tongue along his bottom lip.
"Coffee? At this time of night?" she raises an eyebrow, playing dumb. It gives him a chance to turn away but he is relentless. As usual.
"I can get a decaf," he shrugs.
Maddie plays with her fingers, knowing that once this starts, she won't be able to stop it, "Listen," she leans against the door frame, feeling like an asshole that she has to do this again, "I know what you want. But I can't give it to you."
Negan furrows his brows, eyes starting to sparkle as if he was a puppy, "I'm not asking for… darlin', I just… I miss you."
"I know you do," Maddie nods, sighing, "But you're with Stella. She doesn't deserve this, and you know it."
It seems like the fog around him has cleared and he can finally think and see straight. He nods slowly, a smile creeping up onto his face, "You are always ten times the person I am."
Maddie scoffs, "Maybe even ten times the man you are."
"I don't know about that," he chuckles, infecting her with laughter as well, "Although you do have bigger fucking balls than me."
She enjoys the way he looks down at her, and her instinct is to grab his shirt, pull him in and slam the door shut. However, she knows that nothing good will come from it.
"I'm gonna break up with her," he says.
Maddie widens her eyes, pretending not to get excited, "Erm… what? Why? Why would you do that?"
"Because I want to be with you," he states, "I've always fucking wanted you, and you know this."
She didn't realise that he has already grabbed her hand and started to draw circles on the top. Her eyes glance over his shoulder to see if anybody is watching, because the one thing that spreads around this place faster than a fire, is gossip.
Maddie leans into his touch, until he envelopes her in his arms. She has always been the one to run from him, but it seems like her efforts are futile. They have been through some shit. Heavy shit. And through it all, they still always have each other.
Negan kisses the side of her head, inhaling her smell while she is still within proximity.
"I hope your fucking silence doesn't mean you are rejecting me, doll," he mutters against her ear.
Maddie giggles, pulling away finally, "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
He nods slowly, "Is that… is that a yes?"
She laughs again, pushing at his chest, "Go home, Negan. We will talk tomorrow."
He smirks, finally stepping down the stairs and turning to look at her again, "I'll see you tomorrow then, darlin'."
Maddie waves at him, watching as he strolls down the dark street, smiling to himself.
I feel like I have some explaining to do here. Well, basically, in the next chapters you will see a lot of flashbacks about how they came to this community, what they went through and why it leads to them not being together anymore.
Don't get me wrong, they will end up together! I can promise you that. I just hope you are ready for the drama. Please leave reviews, can't wait to see what you think of this!
