Author's note: I'm not even sorry this chapter is so long. I had such a wild time writing it :P No regrets! Hope you good folk are having a good or at least bearable day! DRINK FLUIDS! YOU ARE GREAT!
Rosenthorne: I'm so sad about Aragorn and Arwen, honestly. I wish he'd just hooked up with Éowyn and called it a day. It's all beer and skittles until the mortal pops their clogs. And Rhodri... yeah, she is rather powerful. Though I think if she had her 'druthers, she'd either not have them at all, or use them strictly for fun, like moving rocks for diving platforms :D
Guest: Oh, don't worry about that. Rhodri is very, very used to making an absolute tit of herself in front of Glorfindel. And everyone else. Honestly, the girl has no shame whatsoever at this stage. :P
FriendlyNeighborhoodHufflepuff: ugh, their love makes me sick at times. Some people, honestly. Also, I thought of you as I put the HP reference in there :D
§
The weeks passed and the summer was behaving like that one guest at every party. You know the one, they say they'll be going now, but do they go now? Do they hell. They get you up out of your seat as they make their way to the door, take an age to put their shoes and coat on, and then they proceed to make you stand at the entry with the door open, letting all the heat out while talk at you for several more hours. The bastards never go. You offer them a bed for the night, and they insist that they will be leaving. They never do. It's like a bloody gothic novel.
Naturally, whatever the weather was had no bearing on me physically, and it hardly mattered for the Elves, either. We were happy to swim and frolic about in any season. All I really wanted was a straight answer: was summer off home now, or was it going to hang around?
The response I wanted didn't really eventuate, and I sat in my office on one of these dithering days, sulking about it for far longer than befitted someone of my age. Thankfully, I was sent a distraction by means of a knock at the door.
I looked up. "Oh, hello there, Estel- ah, sorry, Aragorn, darling. Don't worry, I'll remember automatically soon enough." I shook my head at my forgetfulness.
Aragorn smiled gently. "Don't worry, Auntie," he said with his usual good humour. "Are you busy?"
"Ha!" I said, perhaps a little louder than was needed to make my point. "Come on in, kiddo. Fancy a game of checkers?"
"Don't you ever tire of losing?" he asked with a laugh as he stepped inside and sat down.
"Nah," I said in an unconcerned tone. "The competition is the least important aspect of the game for me." I paused a moment, adding, "That's probably for the best, really, given my current win statistics," as an afterthought. "Let's make it a bit more interesting and have a rule that you can't move pieces by picking them up between your fingers."
Aragorn snorted but he nodded, chose the red counters (as always), and the game began.
"So is this a social call," I asked, "or have you hunted me out for other purposes? Both are equally welcomed and relished, of course."
"Both, I think," he answered as he nudged one piece forward with the tip of his finger.
"Had any more of those panic attacks?"
"No, nothing like that," he shook his head, making his hair swish as he did.
"Good to hear. Just thought I'd check," I explained, giving him the thumbs up. "So what's shakin'?" I gently flicked a piece forward.
"You use such odd expressions, Auntie," Aragorn said with a chuckle as he took a pencil off my desk and poked at the piece he wanted to move.
"What are the kids saying these days, then?" I asked. "I'm not a regular aunt, I'm a cool aunt. Gotta stay abreast with the youth of today."
He failed to suppress a smile as he rolled his eyes. "You can just ask me what I'm here for."
I rolled my eyes right back at him. "Fiiiine," I said dramatically, taking the pencil out of his hand. "What are you here for, then?"
"To say goodbye," he admitted.
I didn't look up, laying the pencil over my hand like it was a pool cue. "Goodbye? Why, are you off on a trip for a while?" I knocked one checker into another, sending the piece I wanted moving over a space.
"Ooh, let me try that," Aragorn said with interest, taking the pencil back and lining up his shot. "But yes, I suppose it is a trip of sorts."
"Don't hit it too forcefully, just one short, sharp strike," I advised. "Where are you off to?"
"I'm not sure."
"But definitely away from here?"
"Mmm," he replied as he made a small jab and knocked the desired piece over two squares.
"I see! So how long do you think you'll be gone, then?"
"Quite some time, I envision," he answered, looking up at me now.
Feeling his eyes on me, I met his gaze. "Can you give me a rough estimate? As in weeks, months… years?"
"I predict it may be decades," he said quietly.
I frowned slightly. He didn't seem too thrilled to be leaving, especially for such an extended period. I was half wondering if there was something at play regarding his thing for Arwen.
"Are you doing this of your own free will?" I enquired, watching him closely.
"Oh, yes," he replied with a nod. "I haven't been exiled or anything like that."
"You don't appear to be eagerly anticipating this, kiddo, I have to say." I raised my eyebrows at him.
"A part of me hates to leave," he murmured sadly. "I love Arwen...dows. Our windows. You know, the stained glass ones," Aragorn blinked quickly for a moment but seemed convinced that he'd managed to pull off his ridiculous verbal edit.
I gave him such a sceptical look that I made two new chins appear before I spoke.
"You know, Aragorn, the last time I misspoke like that, Uncle Glorfindel found out I was hugely and embarrassingly in love with him." I shrugged nonchalantly. "Now, I'm not saying that's the only instance in which such errors of speech arise, and far be it from me to harbour suspicions, but you did just mention a whole name there. Wanna talk about what's going on here?"
Aragorn leaned back in his chair and groaned. "I had been keeping it from people so well, and then suddenly it just flew out in a moment of weakness."
I leaned forward and blew one of my pieces forward. "I mean, you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." Aragorn looked relieved at that, and I immediately understood the topic to be off-limits unless he brought it up himself. "Why are you leaving, then, if you don't even know where you're going?"
"Oh, well, that bit's not so difficult," he answered as he angled his elbow and awkwardly used it to bump a piece forward. "I can't tell you where I want to go because I will seek the last of my people, living in the wild. But I don't know where they are right now, you see?"
"Ah, that's quite the conundrum," I acknowledged with a nod. "A solid plan, though. You'll pick up a lot from them, I think."
"That is certainly the plan," he said, looking a little more hopeful now.
"So this is, what, phase one of your self-discovery plan, then, is it?"
"In essence, yes," he confirmed.
"Wow, that happened fast," I murmured to myself, a little dazed. "Could only have been a week or so ago that you were giggling and hiding as your mother tried to make you go to bed. Oh, wait… it was a week ago." Aragorn scowled and looked away.
"Ah well, you'll set your own bedtime from now on. You'll soon learn what works for you," I said with a cackle. "Well, kiddo, we'll miss you terribly while you're gone, but you'll pop by for a visit every handful of decades or so, won't you?"
He confirmed that he definitely would. I smiled.
"And hey, look, you know if something goes wrong, you can always come back and nobody will judge you. We're always here for you, and we'd love to help however we can." I got up and moved one of my checkers with my nose.
"Thanks, Auntie Rhodri," he said quietly as his eyes darted around on the checkers board. Without saying a word, he picked up two pencils and made a pincer with them, picking up one of his pieces and, I shit you not, jumped all of mine, winning instantly.
"Keep practicing while I'm away," this bold little whippersnapper said to me with a smile as my jaw dropped.
"For the love of god."
§
Aragorn left an hour later, and not long after that, Glorfindel and I found ourselves on Elrond's balcony, wine in hand and sunset at the ready.
"How are you doing with your little fledgling heading out into the world?" I asked Elrond gently, his pensive face overly absorbed in the sunset.
"It's a rather trying time, to be honest," Elrond admitted as he absent-mindedly swirled his wine.
"He'll be back soon enough," Glorfindel said, giving him an affectionate pat on the back.
"Too soon, perhaps," he murmured somberly, brows knitted as he kept his gaze fixed on the distance.
Glorfindel and I looked at each other in surprise, and then at him.
"My goodness, Elrond, what do you mean by that?" Glorfindel exclaimed as he sat up in his chair to watch him closely.
Elrond sighed and shook his head, his expression pained, guilty, and unmistakably resentful. "I didn't mean it, really," he said defeatedly. "Not like that."
He looked over at Glorfindel and me, who were fixing him with enquiring stares.
"He is in love with Arwen," he said, frowning deeply now.
Normally, Glorfindel was the type who delighted in folks falling head over heels with each other, but on this occasion, his lack of immediate cooing and gushing were very conspicuous.
"Oh, dear," he said quietly, worriedly putting a hand over his mouth.
"Does Arwen return his affections?" I asked in a rather grave tone.
"Not presently," Elrond answered. "But I am not keen to take any risks. I am thinking of sending her back to her mother's family in Lothlórien so that there are no more chance encounters here."
Glorfindel and I both nodded. Arwen liked it well enough there, and Galadriel kept pretty strict borders, so maybe he wouldn't be allowed in.
"Solid plan, mate," I said, giving him the thumbs-up. "How did you learn about this, anyway?"
"I could see it in his eyes," Elrond returned, his voice flinty. "That glimmer whenever he looks at her. It's been going on for weeks. I pulled him aside and spoke to him about it yesterday, and he confirmed my suspicions." He rubbed his face slowly, kneading his temples with his fingertips. "He has no idea what he asks of me."
"He is full young to understand yet, but I imagine you would have helped him along somewhat after he told you this," Glorfindel chimed in.
"I tried," he said, roughly massaging his head with his thumbs now. "I hope I made him feel sufficiently guilty at the prospect of separating us that he is dissuaded from hoping for her now."
The pensive silence that followed did the talking for the rest of Happy Hour as I sipped away on my wine, feeling my stomach churn ever so slightly.
"I felt a little hypocritical with Elrond this afternoon," Glorfindel said to me as we put our pyjamas on that evening.
"Oh? What do you mean?"
"Well, I thought you were mortal when I met you, and I was under that impression for almost a year and a half until we realised you were a Maia," he explained.
I had completely forgotten about that, and slowly looked up at him in shock.
"You're not telling me you would have done what Lúthien did, are you?" I breathed, horrified at the prospect of him cutting his life short.
"Well, I am not Half-Elven, so I cannot do exactly what she would have. Had you outwardly reciprocated my love even a tiny amount back then, though, I am quite certain that when you did eventually die, I would have died of grief shortly after, whether we married or not." He let out a sigh as he pulled his nightshirt on. "How Aegnor managed to resist Andreth is beyond me, because I certainly would not have been able to do the same with you."
"If the tables were turned, I'm sure I wouldn't have, myself," I admittedly quietly as I hitched up my pyjama pants.
I was more relieved at that point than ever that I was a Maia, and resolved never again to carp about the moral discomfort of reading thoughts. Talk about first world problems, gee.
"I can understand the position Aragorn finds himself in somewhat, and I do not envy him in the slightest," Glorfindel continued. "But the temptation is huge. Like I said before, the heart wants what it wants."
"It's quite cruel that we don't get a say in who we fall for," I murmured sadly. "With that said, though," I added as I looked at Glorfindel with a broad smile, "sometimes you really luck out."
He beamed at me, scooped me up and walked over to the bed. "I couldn't agree more," he said, eyes sparkling as he set me down, and with that, we proceeded to undo all the work we had put into getting our night attire on.
The White Council meeting came around much quicker than I had anticipated. Time flies when you're having a good time, they say. I hadn't been doing anything special at the time except, perhaps, indulging the occasional, delicious fantasy that I delivered a swift kick to Curumo's arse at the meeting, an action met with a standing ovation from the others present. Absolutely scrummy sort of thing to dream of, but as the name implied, it remained the stuff of dreams and birthday wishes.
As it happened, though, I couldn't help but notice that this meeting was scheduled to fall on my 4,728th birthday.
"What an amazing coincidence," I murmured to myself as I looked at the calendar, perceiving a curious flutter of superstitious hope as I imagined the grunt that would come out of Curumo as I booted him across the room like a football.
Birthdays were a right royal affair among the Elves, especially the ones in Imladris, who were always on the lookout for an excuse to push the boat out. They'd have celebrated the opening of a jam jar if they could get away with it.
Oddly enough, though, I was technically the only resident whose birthday was observed. The Elves, in their mysterious wisdom, decided the observation of one's day of conception to be more sensible, which baffled me. I, for one, had absolutely no desire to wolf down a piece of cake commemorating the day Ernest and Grace Fanshawe got their rocks off. Happily, I didn't need to, because I never heard what day that had occurred. The Elves had it a bit easier in that regard, though, because pregnancy lasted exactly one year. In either case, I enjoyed celebrating it because it always entailed a surfeit of cake and attention.
This year was no different, the day starting with Glorfindel waking me up singing the birthday song in English (not Westron, actual English). I ended up paying more attention to his accent, which was a fascinating blend of Welsh as he softened the consonants and something Scandinavian in the vowels.
"Captivating, my love," I said to him when he had finished, applauding gently. "You sound even better this year than you did last year."
"I've been practicing," he said, giggling happily at the praise. "Come, let's go outside so you can have your present."
"Present?" I asked in surprise. Gift giving was rare after the first hundred years, because can you imagine how much stuff people of 4, 5, 6 thousand years of age would accumulate with a gift every birthday?
"Indeed," he replied with a grin as he bounced out of bed.
I hopped up and we threw some clothes on and headed out to the dining hall where Elrond and Olórin were waiting for us.
"Congratulations on the anniversary of your mother's greatest physically unpleasant day to date," said Elrond jovially, clapping me on the shoulder as he bit back a giggle. He and I had always disagreed about observing conception day vs. birthday, and as our friendship matured over the long years, the teasing had become progressively more merciless.
"Thanks, friendo," I said with a smirk. "Hard to believe your own anniversary of your parents' most physically gratifying day to date is just around the corner."
Glorfindel snorted for a moment until he appeared to realise his own ageing-up was celebrated for the same reason, after which he shuddered a little.
"We hope you'll like your present," Olórin said, evidently hoping to bring some decorum back to the table. He handed me a plate with slices of fresh bread on it.
"Oh, I love it!" I enthused as I took the plate and availed myself of a few pieces. "Absolute corker of a gift, you three, thank you so-"
"Rhodri, you eat this bread for breakfast every morning," Glorfindel reminded me as he raised his eyebrows.
I paused. "This is true," I conceded. "Well, it's still very nice," I added as I took a bite and relished the feel of the warm, doughy mass between my teeth.
The meeting was scheduled to start shortly after breakfast, so I ended up taking my bread with me, so impatient were my tablemates to show me my birthday present.
They took me outside, where Glorfindel placed one hand over my eyes and guided me along the corridors with the other. We seemed to be walking forever, but I was finally stopped, upon which he moved his hands away.
"Magnificent!" I gasped as I opened my eyes and looked ahead. My office entryway and door had been decorated! A young climber vine had been trained over the door jamb, and my cherrywood door had had the design of a psi carved into the panel. The psi, symbol of psychology and psychiatry, had been stylised into the trunk of a tree with hundreds of leaves blossoming out of it. It was gorgeous.
"That's absolutely fantastic," I breathed. "Thank you so much!"
"I'm so pleased you like it," said Glorfindel, smiling radiantly with the other two.
"That's the understatement of the year," I returned, wide-eyed. I turned to face the three of them.
"Do we really need to attend this meeting? How about we cancel it and just have a picnic in front of the door?"
"Ah, if only eschewing our duty were so simple," said Elrond wistfully.
"And without consequence," chimed in Olórin with a chortle.
Collectively shrugging as we accepted our fate, we made for the meeting room, where just about everyone seemed to be already seated- everyone, that is, except for Curumo. I pulled up a chair beside Glorfindel and Olórin, feeling all eyes on me as I sat down. Evidently, the Council members not present at Dol Guldur got wind of the little altercation that had happened there. I gave them all a polite smile and waited for the man of the hour to slink in.
An ease eventually settled over the room that was scattered to the four winds like loose birdseed when Curumo entered with his usual "ah, yes, you peasants again" face and sat down beside Aiwendil. For a brief moment, he looked at me, and I almost (almost) gave into the temptation to blow him a kiss, just to shake him up, but I didn't want anyone getting the impression I was an unfaithful spouse or was trying to get into Curumo's pants (shudder). I compromised and gave him a warm smile instead, which he didn't appreciate one bit, wrinkling his nose a little and taking his gaze elsewhere.
"Rhodri…" came a warning voice in my head. I looked to my left and saw Elrond giving me the side-eye.
I gently rolled my eyes. "Fine…" I replied reluctantly and looked straight ahead again.
"And what is it we're here for this time?" Curumo enquired of us. "I hope it isn't another trifling matter where you see fit to air your grievances over nothing at all."
"We're here to celebrate my birthday," I replied with a grin and then looked at him seriously. "You're not going to tell me you arrived without a gift, are you?"
Olorin, tutting at me, swatted my shoulder lightly and stood up, ready to assume his usual position of chief informer.
"Our "grievances" as you call them, Curumo, have been perfectly justified in the past, and we are now in the unhappy position of being compromised for having not taken action earlier."
"Oh?" Curumo answered in a condescending tone. "Please, go ahead and enlighten us as to what the gross offences of Sauron have been this time."
"My concern is not what he has done, but what he is doing now, and what will come of it later," Olorin replied harshly, his patience already waning. "The Nine continue to comb the land for a sign of the One Ring, but their search narrows by the day. I fear that they- and their master- know something more of the Ring's location that we do not."
The Council members looked distinctly unsettled, sharing nervous glances and murmuring among themselves until Curumo, now standing himself, raised a hand and asked for quiet.
"Olorin," he said with obviously forced patience, "I am here to tell you that you are mistaken. The Ring is nowhere to be found in Middle-Earth now."
As those words escaped his mouth, and he proceeded to launch into a litany of "why you're wrong and I'm right," I knew my opportunity to take a peek in his head had come at last. Pretending to gaze out the window behind him, I zipped into his head, quick as a snake.
Inside Curumo's mind wasn't nearly as pleasant as Elrond and Glorfindel's had been. It had the sort of atmosphere that Harry Potter film set designers would have jumped on for the Slytherin Common Room. It was dim and cold, and the memories and thoughts rolled by, travelling in straight lines like steam trains, looking more ghostly and sinister than I'd seen.
I scanned the passing memories and thoughts quickly, knowing I had very little time to find something that might be of any use to me. Somewhere close by the back was a rather elusive little wisp of a thought, caught in one spot, rapidly transforming.
I peered closer at it and saw the shapes it took were to do with the sea the Ring was meant to have been washed into, but occasionally it seemed to glitch and take the shape of the area where the Nazgul were meant to be hunting, the Ring plainly in sight in the grass. I frowned. Was this his train of thought, perhaps? Was he trying to allay our suspicions with proposals of sunken treasure?
While I watched it even more intently, the thought glitched again, only this time, it took the form of Curumo holding the Ring like it was a winning lottery ticket. My eyes widened. That was precisely what I was looking for, but I was still displeased that I had found it. This meant a lot more trouble for us. Deciding I'd seen enough, I skedaddled out of there as quickly as I could.
When I tumbled back into my own head, I was unable to completely hide my momentary disorientation as I gave my head a quick shake and frowned slightly. Curumo stopped waffling a moment, looked at me and raised an eyebrow.
"Is there a problem, Rhodri?" he asked in a voice that indicated he gave absolutely no figs if I had an issue or not. Reflexively, I locked my mind and softened my expression.
Thinking quickly, I said, "Sorry about that. I just realised I've been sitting on my bread all this time." As he went from coldness to bafflement, I leaned to the side and produced three crepe-thin slices of squashed bread, appearing as bitter and remorseful about it as I could manage.
Curumo, eyes slightly wide, gave me a look of deep suspicion before resuming his speech.
"In any case," he rambled on, "the Ring fell into the Anduin long ago, and now lies somewhere at the bottom of the sea, where it will remain until the world's ending. You waste your time hunting for it. You will never find it. Take comfort in the fact that Sauron will never find it either, and leave this ridiculous topic once and for all!"
With a sweep of his cloak, he took his seat again. Olorin looked as frustrated as ever, and I glanced at him.
"Play along with him and adjourn the meeting," I whispered to him in my head. "I've got some news for you, but I can't tell you while Curumo's here."
Still frowning, Olorin sighed and nodded. "Very well," he said. "If you are absolutely certain he will not ever find it, then I suppose there is little point in continuing the meeting."
"Ah, the first sensible thing anyone here has said today," cried Curumo triumphantly, standing up again. "In which case, let us adjourn now so that we might pursue matters of actual importance!"
"Ooh, excellent, like my birthday!" I said excitedly, standing up. "Great! Time to swap out this bread for birthday cake." I patted my back pocket and made my way out to the corridor where I planned to feed the birds.
The air was beautiful and crisp outside, and I loved the feel of it on my face as I headed for a nearby open space. I whistled a short tune and a handful of feathery friends showed up.
"Hello, hello!" I said to them gaily. "Who's hungry?"
They cheeped at me loudly, and I nodded. "I see. Well, have at it!" I tore tiny pieces off the bread and started to throw them toward the ever-growing flock at my feet. I was having a good old time when a voice from behind startled me a little.
"You are hiding something from me."
"Curumo!" I said angrily as I jumped and turned around. "God, who raised you? Don't you know it's rude to startle people like that?" I pursed my lips and looked at him disapprovingly, one hand on my hip. Curumo, unmoved, stared at me with annoyed distrust.
"Do not trifle with me. Don't think I don't know what you did in there."
I feigned irritated confusion. "What the hell are you talking about?"
"Cease this ridiculousness," he snapped. "You think I did not notice you suddenly close your mind when I saw you shaking your head as I spoke?"
"You think I'm going to let some insufferable prick like you rootle around in my head when you haven't even got the decency to show up to my birthday with a PRESENT?" I replied snarkily, my voice getting louder by the minute. "Well let me tell you something. If you think for a minute that you're getting your hands on my secret ice cream recipe, you can think again!" The noise must have tipped the others off, because Glorfindel, Elrond, and Olorin were the first to emerge from the room and hurried over to us.
"Rhodri, Curumo, what is the meaning of all this noise?" Elrond asked authoritatively.
"This nosy bastard," I pointed at Curumo, whose eyes were wide with shock while his brow firmly remained in a frown, "tried to get into my head during that meeting while I was thinking about how to perfect my ice cream recipe!"
Elrond and Glorfindel, god bless them, affected the most terrific taken aback expressions, looking over at Curumo.
"Is this true, Curumo?" Glorfindel asked seriously.
"What an absurd thing to assume, as though I have any interest in your cooking," Curumo spat furiously.
My mouth fell open and I put a hand to my chest, looking insulted beyond belief.
"Well, I never!" I shrieked in a tone of shock and offence. "You, sir, have the social graces of a chamber pot and I will not have it!" I stomped my foot defiantly.
"You came here on business as head of the White Council, but now that that's over, you're here as a guest." I barked at him. "If you're going to stand here insulting my cooking, you can go elsewhere!"
"Rhodri-" Elrond began, eyes wide as he tried to put a hand on my shoulder
"No, Elrond, this man, this-this churlish brute has insulted me too many times!" I snapped, brushing his hand off with a sweeping motion as I turned back to face Curumo, whose astonishment was starting to outweigh his anger now.
"I was going to let you stay for the party tonight despite your lack of a gift, but if this is how you are going to conduct yourself, consider your invitation officially revoked!" I said the last word with flourish and threw up one hand dramatically. Without another word, I turned around and flounced off, leaving a crowd of bewildered Elves, Maiar, birds, and other various onlookers in my wake.
