Trigger Warnings: Violence Attempted Rape briefly mentioned. Standard Disclaimer for this whole work: I own nothing all credit goes to Lena Diaz and maybe a few credits goes to Fox's Glee creative team.
Chapter Ten
Cedes twisted her hands together, the bad memories washing over her from that awful night ten years ago.
"He harassed me, as usual. Grabbed my arm, rubbed up against me."
Sam's pen stopped, his knuckles whitening around his pen. "Was anyone else in the store?"
"The sales clerk. I don't know his name. Oh, and Rachel."
"Rachel Berry?"
She nodded. "She was following Cooper around as usual. And he was ignoring her, bothering me instead. I told him to leave me alone and I hurried to the register to buy Mama's pills. After paying, I ran out to my car and left."
"Where were Cooper and Rachel at that time?"
"Rachel came out shortly after me, drove off in her car. I remember she ended up behind me at a stoplight and gave me the finger. I didn't see Cooper come out of the store. I'm not sure where he went right after that."
"You drove straight home?"
She shook her head. "No. I realized I was almost out of gas and was worried I wouldn't make it home, so I stopped and filled up." She told him which station she'd used.
"Did anyone see you?"
She waved toward the manila folder on the table. "If that's the case file, don't you know this part? I'm sure the chief had his men comb the town to create a timeline for his persons of interest. And with me as the number-one suspect, you probably know exactly how many gallons of gas I got and how I paid for it."
"I knew you were at the store and got gas. But I didn't have your side, that Cooper was harassing you. And I didn't know Rachel was at the store. I'm not trying to be cruel by taking you through every step. I'm just trying to ensure that we don't miss anything, okay?"
"Okay."
"You filled up, went inside to pay?"
"Had to. I didn't have Mama's credit card, didn't expect to need gas. She only gave me five bucks for the pills. Luckily I had some of my babysitting money in my purse. But, yeah, I had to go inside to pay. Mr. Ryerson was the one working that night. That one's easy to remember. He's there all the time. Even now. I saw him there last week."
Sam's mouth quirked in a half smile. "He runs that place like his own little fiefdom. How long were you inside?"
"Not long. Maybe five minutes. I drove home, gave Mama the pills, put her to bed. I was about to go to bed myself when I heard a soft knock on the door. But no one was there. That's when I saw the note. Someone had slid it under the door."
He stopped writing. "A note? Who was it from?"
"You."
His head jerked up. "Me? I didn't send you a note."
"I know that now, of course. The note was supposedly sent through one of your friends. It said your dad was mad at you for something and took your phone. But that you really needed to talk to me, that it couldn't wait. I figured you were still angry at me turning down your proposal, that maybe you were going to try to convince me to say yes. But I was also worried that something else had happened, that maybe you were in trouble. The note said to meet you at a cabin on the Anderson property. It even had a little hand-drawn map."
"You didn't think that was odd? You didn't think to call me?"
"Why would I? I had no reason not to believe the note, that your dad had your phone. We'd met in that barn on the Anderson property a dozen times. I figured the cabin was somewhere new you'd discovered, yet another building close to the border of your dad's property where we could meet without being caught. It really didn't seem any different than meeting you in our usual spot. And, well, after we'd left on such bad terms, I figured maybe you didn't want to meet at the barn. Karma and all that. I was anxious to try to smooth things over. I didn't want you to hate me."
A pained expression crossed his face. "I could never hate you, Cedes. I assume that was the same cabin where Cooper's body was later found?"
She nodded.
"Please tell me you kept the note."
"I had it with me when I went to the cabin. But not when I left."
"I didn't see it listed in the police report of items found."
"All I know is that it was in my pocket when I got there. But not later. I assume Cooper took it."
He set his pen and notepad on the end table and turned to face her. "Tell me everything, Cedes. Exactly as you remember it."
"As soon as I got there and went into the outbuilding, I knew I'd been tricked. You weren't there waiting for me. Since your house is so close by, there's no way I'd have gotten there before you. I turned around, and Cooper had just come inside. He was grinning like an idiot as he closed the door. But I was the idiot." She clenched her hands into fists.
"What did he do?"
She closed her eyes, wishing she could block out the memory of Cooper just as easily. "He threw me to the floor and...and lay on top of me. He held my face still and kissed me. When I tried to bite him, he squeezed my jaw until I cried out. I didn't try to bite him again. It was awful. He ripped my shirt, sending buttons flying all over the cabin. He had a knife. He cut my bra off. And then, then he..." She shook her head. She couldn't tell Sam all the horrible things that Cooper had done to her, how he'd held the knife to her and put his mouth where Sam's had so recently been. It was like he'd destroyed every beautiful touch she and Sam had shared before he'd asked her to marry him, and then turned it into something ugly.
"Earlier, at your house when I first questioned you, you said he didn't rape you. Was that true?" His voice broke on the last word, and she realized this was just as hard for him as it was for her.
"No. No, he didn't...penetrate me. After he tore off my clothes and did his worst, he was about to...and I knew I couldn't live with myself if he did. I couldn't get my knees up to kick him, so I..." She shuddered. "I grabbed him...there...and squeezed as hard as I could. He screamed and fell off me. I scrambled to my feet and he was calling me ugly names and I'd just reached the door when he grabbed my hair. He yanked me back and I remember I flailed my hands out for something, anything to stop him. And I grabbed something off one of the shelves. Later, I realized it was an empty wine bottle. Probably from the last kids who'd snuck onto the farm and used that cabin. I swung it around in an arc. There was a horrible, sickening thud. And then he fell down on the floor. Dead."
Tears were flowing down her face now. "I gathered up my clothes, searched for the buttons, but I couldn't find the last one. I couldn't stay another minute, knowing he was dead. So I ran, got in the car. Drove home. And that's why my mama wouldn't let me talk to the police. She knew what I'd done the moment I got home in my torn clothes. She burned them in the fireplace. She vacuumed the car, scrubbed it down, just in case I'd brought any evidence back with me. And she burned the vacuum bag, the paper towels she used, everything. And she made me swear never, ever to say anything at all to the police."
She was crying hard now, and hated that she was crying. And suddenly Sam was in front of her, kneeling on the floor. He'd scooted the table out of the way and was pulling her hands down from her face, looking up at her with some kind of emotion she couldn't even fathom.
"Are you absolutely sure you told me everything from that night? You didn't leave out any details?"
"The only details I left out were the vile things he did to my body before he tried to rape me. No, Sam. There's nothing else to tell. I killed him. I didn't mean to, but I did. And Mama and I were both too afraid to say anything because I'd made so many complaints about Cooper. And his father always made the complaints go away. And everyone knew I hated him. There was no way they'd believe me over Cooper's father."
She drew a shaky breath. "I'm not a complete idiot. When I was in jail, after the chief locked me up, I had plenty of time to sit and think about what had happened. And I knew that Mama and I had made some really bad decisions. Maybe if we'd called the police right away and didn't burn my clothes, the clothes might have helped build my case of self-defense. It's possible, I suppose. But by then, we'd already destroyed evidence. Even at eighteen I knew that was wrong, illegal and only made me look guilty. I couldn't tell the chief what really happened at that point. He could have arrested my mom for helping me cover up what happened."
She could tell from the intensity of his gaze and the way he was looking at her with laser like focus that she wasn't going to like his next question.
"Cedes, you said you wouldn't let me see you in jail, to protect me. Because you were worried that it could hurt my future career aspirations. While I might not agree with your decision, I can sort of understand it. At that age, as young as we both were, I get how things could look different. But when the chief didn't have enough evidence to press charges, you left town. And you stayed gone for ten years. Why, in all that time, did you never once call me?"
And there it was. The question she'd both expected and dreaded ever since she'd come back to Destiny. It was one of the primary reasons she'd hoped to avoid him. She twisted her hands in her lap, and said the only thing she could think of.
"You didn't call me, either."
His brows raised. "You made it painfully clear through Chief Schuester that you never wanted to see me again. I respected your wishes, even if I didn't understand them."
She looked away.
"Cedes. Why?"
She squeezed her eyes shut, swallowing hard against the tightness in her throat before looking at him again. "Everything just sort of built on everything else. After what happened with Cooper that night, I knew that if I let you back into my life you would do everything you could to protect me. If I spoke to you, I knew I'd tell you exactly what I did, what my mom did to help me cover it up. That would make you complicit in destroying evidence and would ruin your future career. Whether you agree with my reasons or not, all I can say is that my life became a snowball that kept rolling downhill and getting bigger and bigger. I left town to let things die down, hoping Mr. Anderson would quit lobbying for me to be arrested. Mama kept me updated on what was happening with the case and I knew it only got worse after I left. For a long, long time Mr. Anderson pushed and pushed the chief to find and arrest me."
Sam slowly nodded. "You're right. He was like a crazy man for the better part of a year before he stopped visiting the station every day, demanding your head on a silver platter."
"I know. And by then, I was building a life in Nashville. I got a job singing backup and dubbing for artists. Then I was writing songs and got so busy with my career and getting the recording studio going. And from there, it was easier if I didn't think of Destiny and what I'd run from."
"Including me?"
Her lip wobbled when she answered. "Yes. Including you. It hurt just to think about you. You were the reminder of everything that I'd lost. It was easier to push you to the back of my mind. To try to never think of you again. It was also the reason I never tried to put out music myself. Knowing that if I became famous people in Destiny especially the Andersons would drag my name in the mud and demand my arrest."
He winced and looked toward the back wall of windows at the ever-darkening stormy-looking sky. What had he expected her to say? That she loved him then, loved him still? She did, with her whole heart. But she'd lost everything the night Cooper Anderson died, seeing her mother daily, her friends, her dreams of a career in singing, and Sam. And the only way she could survive that loss was to start over.
A long time passed in silence. When Sam finally turned back toward her, he was Detective Sam Evans again. All business and professional. With none of the earlier warmth he'd shown. He asked her more questions, and every time she heard his cold voice, her heart broke a little bit more.
Finally, after answering another one of his questions, she said, "This is such a nightmare."
His jaw tightened, and she knew he was probably thinking the same thing. Except that his nightmare was that he had agreed to help her. And that he was most likely regretting that decision now.
"Just tell me one more thing," he said. "Do you remember if Cooper wore his ring that night?"
"The chunky one with diamonds all over it, the one his father gave him as some kind of heirloom? That he lorded over all of us at school? That ring?"
"Yes. That ring."
"Definitely. It got caught in my hair when he grabbed me. Ripped out some of my hair by the roots. Or, at least, it felt like it."
"Did you take the ring with you when you left?"
"No. I wish I'd thought to. It probably has my DNA all over it, from my scalp. Yet another reason not to cooperate with the police. Why? I'm guessing you found it and want me to give a DNA sample for comparison?"
He shook his head. "The ring was never found."
She frowned. "But that doesn't make sense. He was definitely wearing it."
"You said you hit him on the head with a wine bottle?"
"Yes. It was one of those blue ones. I don't remember the label."
"What did you do with the bottle?"
She frowned again. "Other than hit him? Nothing. I already told you what happened."
"Humor me. Please. Did you take the wine bottle?"
"No. I didn't take anything but the buttons from my shirt, the ones I found anyway. The note that was in my pocket was gone. All I can figure is when Cooper was...pawing me, that he yanked it out. Probably to make sure I couldn't show it to anyone to prove that he'd lured me there. I didn't think to look for it when I left, because I didn't know it was gone at the time."
"Did you clean the cabin?"
She gave him an incredulous look. "I just told you I didn't take anything or even stop to see if I still had the note."
"Cedes. It's important. Did you clean the cabin?"
"No. No, I didn't clean the cabin. I was too messed up to even think about something like that. I grabbed the buttons that I saw, grabbed my clothes and just...ran, back through the trees to where I'd hidden my mom's car."
"Are you sure about these details? You've told me everything?"
"I've been seeing that same night play out in my nightmares for ten years. I'm sure."
"Cedes, if you're telling me the truth—"
"I am. I swear."
"If you're sure you've told me everything, then I'm sure of something else. You absolutely did not kill Cooper Anderson."
