A/N; a small warning before reading. Dark themes ahead. We can't have darkness without light or light without darkness, comedy without tragedy...
So dark chapters ahead. Just bear in mind I prefer comedy and fun and I prefer happy ever afters.
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The Visitors of Sheev Palpatine
At a remote clifftop villa in a select area of Naboo, Sheev Palpatine (clad only in a black silk dressing gown) rested his arms on the balcony rail and stood, gazing out into the night. Above him, two of the planet's moons shone down on the reflective surface of the lake in front of the villa.
The view was one of the main reasons he'd purchased the place. He liked to spend long hours staring out at the surrounding scenery and even commissioned paintings to grace the walls of his offices on Coruscant. Another reason for the villa's purchase was its remoteness. Only a select few were allowed admittance, for it housed many of the Supreme Chancellor's more private and unusual collections. Some of which would have horrified the Jedi and raised the eyebrow of even those with no Force sensitivity.
To any idle observer (and there weren't many of those around) who spotted the man leaning on his balcony, they'd assume he was simply enjoying the view. Something he always did when visiting the villa. However, this time Sheev Palpatine's mind was focused on something else entirely.
He'd connected to the Force. Searching out through the currents for any trace of the Slayer who, as always, was hiding her location from him. She was so fascinatingly elusive and he craved to learn the secrets behind her skills.
From the moment Buffy popped into his dimension he'd sensed the ripples in the Force. At first, he'd been concerned. The presence of another Dark Side user was bound to make any ambitious Sith wary. After all, it had taken him years of planning to kill Darth Plagueis. What if this new Dark Sider was as bad? But then he'd met the newest Chosen One - Buffy Summers- and known instinctively they were made for one another. Together they'd be unstoppable. He would become the Dark Emperor to her Killer Queen and, once they'd learn the secret of eternal life, they could rule the galaxy forever.
Where was his little Sith Queen? Buffy had such an enviable ability to hide her presence in the Force. His mouth twisted into an evil smirk. Inter-dimensional Force void! Palpatine chuckled. Only the Jedi Order would fall for that one. They were all so pathetic they didn't deserve to draw breath, especially Yoda.
If their first mistake was giving her house-room, than their second was setting their squeakiest clean knight the task of watching her. The inexperienced knight had been out of his depth from the start. She'd groomed him and then, when he'd wavered, brought him to heel by 'kindly' lending him Darth Maul's lightsaber. Those crystals were charged with all Maul's hate and anger at the Jedi. Squeaky Clean hadn't stood a chance against the Dark Side saber's onslaught.
Palpatine let out a delighted cackle. Clever Buffy and what stupid Jedi! Hadn't history shown them that time and time again more Jedi fell to the Dark Side than Sith fell to the Light? They should have learned by now that the Dark Side was the most dominant aspect of the Force. It would be the Jedi's arrogance, narrow-mindedness, and their inability to learn that would lead to their downfall. That and his well-laid plans. His face soured. Some of those plans hadn't turned out as well as they could have done, but no matter. There was always a backup plan.
The Supreme Chancellor lifted a hand, running his fingers through his thinning hair. Beneath his fingers, the winged style that he'd favored for decades felt outdated. It was time for a more up-to-date look. He needed something to make him look younger.
Perhaps, he needed to adopt a more modern style of clothing too? A classical style was all very well, but it put years on you. Was black his color? He twitched his dressing gown self-consciously. It could be draining to the skin when one matured. He grimaced at his own indecision. It seemed he'd neglected his fashion sense in his quest to become the Supreme Chancellor.
His face softened. Buffy would notice if he sported a new haircut and restyle. When he'd exited the shower and found her 'mistakenly' in his bedroom he'd seen the way her eyes lingered on his body. She'd been impressed and he'd enjoyed her attention. Maybe he should start wearing a more casual outfit? Something open-necked, with a medallion to draw the eye?
But that might cause the Jedi to notice his toned physique and guess it came from combat and lightsaber training. It wouldn't do to warn them before he had everything in place. He comforted himself with the thought Buffy would soon be his wife. There was no real need to openly drop the disguise.
The Slayer wouldn't be disappointed with him as a husband. Ensuring one was in the peak of fitness was a priority of a Sith Lord. All those long meditation and training sessions did wonders for a man's stamina and vitality, no matter what his age. Palpatine could safely say, he hadn't met a woman yet who hadn't been stunned into silence by his prowess between the sheets.
Still, it was a pity the Vengeance demon hadn't sent Buffy to him earlier. If only she'd seen him coming into his prime, before all those Dark Side rituals had taken their toll on his handsome features. They'd have made a powerful couple even at a young age. Of course, Darth Plagueis might not have been happy about it. Although the Sith were allowed relationships, his Muun master would have sensed the Slayer's power and he'd wanted to conduct experiments on the Slayer in his laboratory. That would have been messy and unfortunate. Palpatine wasn't sure for whom, his old master or the Slayer.
A prickle across his brain's synapsis heralded a Force vision. Eagerly, Palpatine opened himself up to receive it.
Sheev Palpatine sat on a low wall outside a red-bricked school. Above him, the sun blazed down on the courtyard and around him milled the students. He was a teenager again, with all the depressing awkwardness that came with it.
(The Supreme Chancellor shuddered. He'd forgotten about being a teenager.)
Surrounding him were all his friends. (Friends? He couldn't remember friends.) A warm glow filled this young Sheev. Not only from the heat of the sun overhead but also the warmth of friendship and the smile of a very young Buffy Summers. The Slayer looked around fifteen years of age. She was pretty, in a cute, upturned nose kind of way. The kind of way that turned a teenage boy's head and led to embarrassing fantasies and the urge to carry her schoolwork. "What do you think Steve?" Buffy asked, giving him that special smile that sent his heart into a flutter. "Do we research demons in the library later or do we sneak out to hunt vamps in those creepy Sith tombs you told me about?"
The Force vision faded leaving the Supreme Chancellor feeling off-balance. Had the Force shown him an alternate past? He wasn't sure he liked it. It had felt too golden and centered in the Light Side. Where was the power-hungry edge he'd remembered having as a boy? He'd craved adrenaline rushes, power, and cared for no one. If he'd met Buffy, would all that excess energy have been channeled into fighting vampires? It was a thought that left him floundering.
Palpatine scowled. No matter, that past hadn't happened. The only thing that mattered was the future. In every version, he'd seen the Chosen One standing at his side robed in darkness. His loyal and willing servant, er, Sith Queen, faithfully slaying all who came before her as his enforcer. If only she wasn't so dratted slippery to pin down.
From the beginning, he'd sought out a way to manipulate her. Shoes. He'd thought he'd cracked it with her shoe addiction. It had seemed so easy, but the plan had been foiled by Dooku. The aging Count had informed him that, as a single lady, Buffy should not be accepting gifts of clothing from a suitor. It was bad etiquette and would reflect poorly on her reputation. The idea was outdated by a few centuries, yet Buffy had listened to the Count.
Palpatine had considered his other options. Attachments were often a weakness and he'd seriously considered kidnapping Andrew. However, there was something about the Watcher that made him uneasy. Despite the boy's being one step away from an imbecile he seemed to have a good grasp of current galactic affairs and knew how to summon demons. From Palpatine's own experience with Sith rituals, he knew someone with those powers should be treated with caution. After all, he didn't want to wake up to find he'd been kidnapped by a demon and left stranded in another dimension. Nor was he all that certain Buffy would notice or care if Andrew went missing. She often appeared frustrated with her apprentice-watcher and might think he'd done her a favor.
A faint sound coming from his bedroom pulled Palpatine from his thoughts. His mouth curled downwards, as he slowly turned towards the balcony doors. Knowing what he'd see and disliking the intrusion into his musing.
Two slightly-built figures wearing long maroon robes froze as they felt the man's eye on them. They'd been told not to leave the bedroom until he ordered them to. Although neither had defied him, Palpatine's anger grew. How dare they disturb his concentration! How dare they be so submissive, so spiritless, so common and, most of all, so blatantly not HER.
The Supreme Chancellor bit back the anger, his face displaying only the benevolent smile he was famous for. With a wave of his hand, he beckoned the pair over.
Fear rolled off the two blonde women. Palpatine leaned back against the balcony, feeling the coolness of the stone through his silk robe and reveling in the way his Sith powers thrived off fear. Those tear-filled downcast eyes irritated him. What had they to cry about? They were being well paid and should count themselves lucky to be here.
He'd the sudden urge to throw them over the balcony rail and listen to their screams as their bodies bounced along the jutting rocks.
"Come, come closer to me," his voice was low, almost seductive. "You know I won't hurt you." His smile became patronizing.
Paid for their obedience in all things, they shuffled closer. It had been a long time since Palpatine had soiled himself with a whore. Only the restless, burning need in his blood had driven him to contact a discreet whoremaster. A whoremaster who, for the right money, would not only provide merchandise to your taste but didn't care what condition they were returned in.
Palpatine's nostrils flared, as the sour smell of their fear reached his sensitive nose. Even their smell was offensive, nothing like Buffy's heady Dark Side perfume. Her scent had intoxicated him. He'd almost lost control before the Jedi masters and that was something he'd never thought he'd do. It had taken steely determination to regain his calm, only for him to be almost undone once more when the Slayer death glared him. She was far more exciting than the pathetic creatures cowering before him. They trembled like pathetic prey animals. Buffy would have stood before him like a dangerous predator.
He reached out, lifting the chin of the one to his right. His pale thin fingers sliding over the swelling on her jaw, his thumb grazing the cut to her lower lip, before moving up to trace egg-shaped lump on her cheekbone. Fractured? Possibly. Not that he cared. She'd been particularly annoying. Strutting into his presence as if she was something special. Palpatine's nostrils flared, the only sign of his growing anger.
He'd soon knocked the idea that she was special out of her. She was nothing! Her only value lay in a passing resemblance to the Slayer. There was wine in his cellar that cost far more than her. A whore was a whore no matter how high class she claimed to be.
He exhaled and let the edge of the anger go. A Sith Queen, on the other hand, was a jewel beyond price and her refusal to be tamed only increased her value. As a true connoisseur, Palpatine knew that the rarest and finest things took time and patience to acquire.
Dropping his hand from the whore's face, he turned his gaze onto the other woman. What a long, delicate slender neck she had. Her skin fine and unblemished. In contrast, the Slayer's was marked with scars from those vampires she'd battled in the past. The whore's creamy expanse drew his eye again. It gave him the urge to call the Force and crush its false perfection.
Taking a deep breath, he savored the spikes of terror rolling off them.
" You've been..." his words trailed away. What had they been? "...ah yes, disappointing."
The woman with the bruised face gave an involuntary gasp.
Palpatine's voice dropped, becoming harsh and cruel, "Any cheap whore plying her trade in the lowest levels of Coruscant would have provided me with more entertainment." He allowed the mask to drop and reveal his true Sith face.
The women dropped their eyes, having seen it earlier and knowing better than to flinch.
"Take my hand," he ordered the one who'd been so sure of herself. His words were laced with Force persuasion. He already knew her mind was weak and defenseless. Pathetic. Buffy's mind shield was like Mandalorian steel door. Nothing entered and nothing escaped. Force knows, he'd tried to pry his way in often enough.
"And you too, my dear," he crooned, holding out his other hand to the remaining whore.
She took it, without raising her eyes to the pale face. Refusing to look at the deep grooves etched around his mouth and eyes.
Holding their hands, he nodded to the chair placed against the balcony rail. "Up you go. Let me see how pretty you look standing high in the moonlight."
The pair scampered up, wobbling as they attempted to balance on the thin rail. Intent to follow instructions. Desperate to keep their balance.
"Dance for me, " Palpatine crooned, his voice a low growl.
Like marionettes the pair began to dance, turning in circles, struggling for balance yet determined to appear graceful. The Supreme Chancellor stepped back, watching their dance in fascination. Would they fall? Or would the Force be on their side tonight? They danced quite prettily, considering their deaths hung in the balance.
When he became bored, he clapped politely and walked over with a brisk stride. As he held out his hands ready to take theirs, an amusing thought occurred to him. A small Force push and they'd fall. He'd enjoy listening to their cries as they fell to their deaths. There was nothing like a kill to invigorate him.
But it would take a long time to remove the mess. His favorite view would be spoiled and that would be a tragedy. Allowing his mask to replace his real face, he became the perfect gentleman as he helped them down.
"Ladies, you had a lovely time here tonight," he said slowly, impressing the thought deep into their minds. "You drank wine and listened to my poetry reading. The bruising you have is from losing your footing on the way home. Wine can be potent, perhaps you should drink less."
He waited until they'd repeated his words back to his satisfaction, before sending them away. When he was certain they'd gone, he moved back to his spot at the railing and stared off into the night.
Was his Sith Queen having fun? She might be out there right now slaying someone with her red lightsaber and dark one. Taking life forces and pretending she wasn't enjoying it. Would Kenobi be with her? Had his lightsaber changed to red yet? Or was he keeping his change of allegiance under wraps still? He hoped the knight remembered his place as an apprentice and didn't try making a move on his Queen. That could cause things to get ugly, fast.
Tonight's fiasco with the whores had impressed on Palpatine that the time had come for his Queen to be at his side, whether she came willing or not. Palpatine took a deep breath and exhaled slowly. He'd let nothing stand in his way. Nothing ever did. Not for long. The image of her new apprentice, Kenobi, rose in his mind once more. A small sneer pulled on his lip. No matter, the ex-Jedi would meet his end soon enough, the Force had assured him Lord Vader would take care of him.
A commotion in the Force currents caught his attention. It appeared his guards had stopped someone trying to get into the villa. Palpatine wasn't expecting visitors. He tilted his head, feeling out with his senses, but the mingling of Force signatures made it difficult to identify the visitor. Whoever it was, the guards were bringing them into the main residence. They must believe this person either had something important news or was important to him.
Important to him... Could it be the Slayer?
Making sure his gown was firmly wrapped around him, Palpatine briskly walked through his bedroom and out onto the landing. The sound of voices and a struggle became louder.
"Pleeze, ex-squeeze me. Isa musta see de big bossman. Supreme Chancellor of Naboo and all de Republic. Much important, dis is."
Palpatine frowned. What was that idiot Gungan, Jar Jar Binks, doing here? He was supposed to be missing, presumed dead. The Supreme Chancellor walked down the elegant stairway, his bare feet silent on the treads. He stopped a few feet from the bottom and looked down on the group before him.
"What is the meaning of this?" he asked haughtily.
The captain of the guards stepped forward, his face red and apologetic. "Beggin yer pardon, Sir. The Gungan minister claims he's information for your ears only. He says it's important he talks to you, tonight."
Palpatine's eyes moved from the guards holding onto the struggling Gungan's arms and then on to the obnoxious Jar Jar's face.
"What do you want, Jar Jar?" he asked.
"Sowwy for disturbin youse. Mesa big news. Maxi big bombad news," Jar Jar's protruding yellow eyes flicked to the guards before he leaned forward in their grip. "Mesa knows a big secret," the obnoxious creature mouthed the word 'Sith' at the Supreme Chancellor, tilted his head and smiled ingratiatingly.
Palpatine tensed. Sith? Had the vile creature found out his status as a Sith Lord? What did he want? Jar Jar stared back at him, smiling. Those yellow eyes looking, surprisingly, intelligent in the dim hallway lighting.
"Wait in my study," barked Palpatine. "I'll dress and be with you shortly."
A/N 2;
Okay, the force vision was from Musey who suggested a write a story where the Naboo Highschool was the new Sunnydale, Giles was a Jedi Watcher, the Watchers Council is the Jedi Council, Buffy is a Slayer and 'Steve' Palpatine is a Xander/Willow/Angel character. Someone with more than a hint of darkness and the ability to fall
I don't have time to write it, so I left the plot bunny hopping about. If anyone wants to use it feel free.
There are plenty of clues in there to my story plot. Or a sequel. ;)
