Chapter Nine: To Forgive and Forget

Bella (POV)

"We need to talk. Hunt with me." I asked from the doorway of Carlisle's office. He looked up and nodded once and got up immediately.

Running through the forest was exhilarating. The sights and sounds were amazing, and the detail with which I could see only made the experience even more enjoyable. The sounds I could hear echoing off the trees and canopy overhead made me want to press my ear to every surface I could see. It wasn't just the sights and sounds; it was the textures and tastes as well. My sense of smell had increased to the point where I could literally taste the air around me. There were no words to express the sensation, it was like tasting life. I never knew the beauty of a smell before. How can you describe the scent of a rabbit as it runs with fear and adrenaline coursing through its veins? There were more things surrounding me then I had ever realized before, and none of them were what I thought they would be.

This existence wasn't a gift; it was a revelation. Nothing about the change so far had been for the worse, my body no longer hurt. I could move in ways I never could've dreamt of doing before, everything was more intense, and I was loving every second of it.

After following a scent line traced into the forest by the Cullens many times, Carlisle caught the scent of a predator. I had fun trailing my new prey, mimicking his movements. It was far too easy to sneak up on the cat, especially since its attention was focused almost entirely on a small herd of deer drinking from a small creek. He motioned for me to watch so I crouched patiently for him to make his move. Then he moved in silently, rendering the cat immobile in less than a second. Then he bit into the animal's thick flesh and wrapped his lips around the wound.

The grotesque and slightly sensual way Carlisle drained the poor animal was hard to watch. But he didn't kill it. Instead he stopped and beckoned me with his eyes. I stopped myself from taking a deep breath and moved over to him. He cut off the flow of blood with his finger and nodded towards the wound. As I got closer, I let my breath go, and took in the smell of the blood.

My throat erupted in flame, and I felt my body moving almost against my will towards the wound. As I bit down Carlisle released the vein and a flood of the think liquid filled my mouth. I had no trouble drinking greedily and had to be pulled away as the animal ran dry. Carlisle was clinical about it and gave me a kept his face passive as I looked around for more. He glanced towards the deer the cat had been hunting, and waited for me to act. I shrugged off the idea of stealth and ran as fast as I could towards the healthiest of the herd. The target wasn't hard to pinpoint, the young male smelled cleaner the then the other two. But he was partially hidden in the protective shadows of the adults flanking him.

Carlisle intercepted the adult directly in my path leaving my prey wide open for my attack. As I closed in, I crossed a new scent trail, this made the musky and slightly distasteful deer seem utterly vile in comparison. I turned and followed my instincts, using my new body to push myself to boundaries I couldn't fully comprehend. The speed and distance I traveled seemed irrelevant, even though in the back of my mind I realized it was quite far from where I was merely seconds before. As I closed on my new prey the smell grew stronger, and my lust for it grew as well.

Suddenly I ran into something hard that knocked me to the forest floor. Instincts took over and I lashed out at the attacker. Carlisle dodged out of the way just as my nails closed within an inch of his chest. As soon as I recognized him, I felt my mind reassert control over my body. He was in a low crouch braced to deflect me again. I closed off my lungs realizing instantly what the scent was, human.

"Oh god I'm so sorry." He blinked and looked at me like I was insane. After a couple of seconds his expression melted to one of awe.

"Bella, you stopped." He was staring at me with such pride that I felt the old impulse to blush. Instead I just mimicked my old mannerisms and felt a pang of disappointment that the blood no longer flooded to my cheeks.

"Of course, I stopped, I can't go after people. I'm sorry I lashed out at you, it felt like the right thing to do." I needed him to understand that it wasn't him I was attacking; it was just an instinct. But he straightened up from his crouch and beamed at me.

"That was amazing Bella." Carlisle seemed awed, but also a touch confused. "Your progress has been exceptional, but unusual. I heard Alice describe your bout of anger yesterday. Could you tell me about it?"

"Yes, I'll tell you what happened as long as you explain yourself." I said crossing my arms. He nodded a couple of times and paused for a second probably to order his thoughts.

"When I was explaining myself to Angela, I realized I hadn't done the same with you and I poured out the truth. Maybe too much of it, Angela hasn't spoken to any of us since." Carlisle frowned and shook his head. "That's no excuse for keeping you in the dark about what was happening to you. If I hadn't been sure of Edward's feelings and yours, I would never have taken the risk." He sighed but didn't look away again.

"What risk? Telling me or changing me, or worse leaving me like that?" I frowned at him.

"The moment you entered our lives and it was clear to us that Edward was in love with you. Which quickly made us realize that the idea of you becoming like us was always a possibility. Edward and Alice even thought of turning you the day of the accident. I fought so hard to keep you alive after you were hurt, partially to see if I could restore your life and partially because I knew you needed to be strong to survive the transition. But Edward, he was so adamant that you stay human, it gave us all doubt." He took a deep exaggerated breath for emphasis.

"You didn't answer my question." I said incredulously.

"You're right. The risks to turning you were three-fold. First was the risk to your life, if your heart failed before the change set in you would have died. Second was the risk of exposure to my family, if for some reason the secret leaked to the humans, we would all be in danger. Lastly, a much closer threat could potentially cause complications that we have yet to address." He spoke seriously, and I could tell all three weighed heavily on his mind.

"The Quileute?" I guessed, and his eyes widened.

"Yes, we have a treaty with them that they could reasonably say we are in breach of by turning you. How on earth did you guess that?" Carlisle looked shocked, and it was my turn to shake my head at him.

"Billy Black threatened me at the wake." I finally admitted, glad to get that off my chest.

"That's troubling. I'll call a parlay and we'll settle this soon. Until then, you should probably stay within our territory, I'll show you the map when we get home. Bella, for what it's worth, I'm sorry for my part in the deception. I was trying to consider the best chance for you to have a happy life, and if I chose wrong…" I held up a hand to stop him.

"I know, and I think you did the right thing by turning me. I'm much happier as I am now, at least so far. The rest, well I know your lie was an attempt to protect me, so I'm inclined to forgive you this time. But don't ever lie to me again like that." My anger felt sharper than when I was human, and he almost seemed a bit afraid at the threat.

"I love you Bella, and I will never lie to hurt you. Can you trust that?" Carlisle spoke with a father's love, and for a moment it was like Charlie was asking me to forgive him.

"Yes, I can trust that. You and Esme are already important to me. You're the kind of parents I wished I had, not that Charlie and Renee are bad parents. That sounded bad didn't it?" I frowned but Carlisle only chuckled.

"Humans do not get to choose their family. One of the perks of our kind is we can choose, and my family has chosen you. Do you accept us?" He offered a hand, and I realized it was an official offer to join him and his family forever.

"I do." I took his hand and found myself in a hug that made me feel loved and secure.

"Thank you." I said pulling away. He smiled and sighed softly.

"My question earlier." Carlisle asked as he turned back towards the house, we would eventually have to run back, but a walk felt right to finally talk and maybe get some more information about my new reality.

"After Edward told me, I lost control, I started screaming and hitting trees randomly. It kept building, and I felt my mind slip into hunger, I launched myself at a tree I had already hit a few times, and as I landed it fell over. I was so startled that my anger broke and I laughed for about twenty minutes. As I sat there, I noticed the sunlight on my skin, is that why they always avoid sunny days at school?"

"It would break our most important law, to not reveal ourselves to the humans." Carlisle nodded. "I hate to ask this but what should I expect going forward between you and Edward?"

"Honestly, I don't know. I feel like he betrayed me, but the situation is a lot more complicated. I know his goal wasn't to hurt me, and I do love him. I'm sorry, I still think it's too soon. I spent all night thinking about it. By the way, is that strange? I mean I figured out we're vampires, but what are the rules?" I looked over and he nodded again.

"I imagine it is a touch confusing. I've told you about our main law, the rest is physiological. Our venom, which you can feel whenever you hunt is what can change a human into one of us. The main thing that changes in transition is that you are locked in this form. You will never age, you cannot cry, you cannot have children. I'm sorry." He said it in as detached and clinical a way as possible, likely in an effort to deflate the emotional strings attached to some of those changes.

"That doesn't bother me, I never wanted kids. Go on." I urged.

"Your hair is as strong as your body, but it does not grow. A need to clip your locks would be a permanent choice. We don't sleep, we don't eat human food, and we need blood to survive. Thankfully that choice is not limited to human. I do need to warn you, animal blood will give you what you need to live, but it will never fully satisfy your hunger." He looked at me thoughtfully then, clearly curious about my response.

"That's a lot. As I told Alice, I have no intention of ever hurting a human if possible." I stopped and leaned against a nearby tree. He smiled widely and released a small breath of air which he must have been holding in. "So, when you told Angela, did you tell her about the accident?"

"No, I didn't. She asked a lot of the right questions, and I wasn't in a position to lie to her. I was feeling guilty enough entrusting her with our secret. It was a dangerous and potentially lethal choice." Carlisle looked almost ashamed with his decision.

"Thank you, for both of us. I wouldn't have brought her into this life, I would have tried to protect her. But knowing she will be there for me still, makes me feel like I haven't lost everything." I let a smile out to try and sooth his guilt, and then continued before he could respond. "Speaking of which, I really need to call her. She must be freaking out."

"Of course, would you like my cell?" He offered. "And some privacy?"

"Yes, please." I took the phone and carefully dialed the number I knew by heart. It rang three times until a familiar voice answered.

"Carlisle?" She sounded upset, almost panicked.

"No, it's me." I said through a smile so wide I thought my face was going to crack in half.

"Bella?" She practically shouted. "Shit, hold a sec." She pulled the phone from her ear and shouted, "It's okay Dad, I'm on the phone with Alice." Then she brought the phone back to her ear and almost whispered, "I can't believe it's you!"

"I would've called yesterday but there was some drama. Edward shaped drama." I found myself frowning again, the joy of talking to my friend dashed by just mentioning Edward.

"Oh no, I'm sorry sweetie. Did you guys have a fight?" She asked as I heard the springs of a bed creak.

"Yes, you could say that. He, god this is actually hard to say, he didn't save me. That probably sounds bizarre." I didn't want to explain, I was already having trouble talking about it.

"That asshat! Of course, that makes so much sense. Why they vanished that day, he chose not to save you." I could hear Angela fidgeting on the other end.

"We're kind of not talking to each other now. Knowing Edward, he's probably moping in his room. Listening to something harsh and classical."

"I heard him listen to alternative music once in his car. It was a bit startling." She started to giggle at the thought.

"When?" I asked curious about the odd behavior.

"The day he returned after going out of town. I think that was about a week after you started school. Anyway, how are you doing? How are you feeling? You sound so different."

"I feel different, Ang, this is so much better than anything I could describe. I feel strong, graceful and I hate to toot my own horn but I'm gorgeous now." I almost chuckled into the phone.

"You were always gorgeous, I'm glad you can see it now. I'm happy this will work for you, and I can't wait to see you. I got the impression from Carlisle that you would be nearly monosyllabic for a while until you got your thirst under control." The question was a good one, and I didn't have a good answer for her.

"I don't know, I woke up and I've been in control… for the most part. I knocked down a tree, it was kind of amazing, and I was able to stop the pull of my thirst towards a human in the woods, but it was hard. Give me a few more days and hopefully I'll be ready to see you. How are you holding up?" I gushed, I felt amazing.

"Freaked, anxious a little terrified. Can't wait to see you." She paused as if she wanted to say something else, but when she continued, she sounded sad. "I should probably go. Hug Alice for me." It was clearly a goodbye, and I didn't want to say it.

"Talk to you soon Ang." I said after a few seconds, she had a home life and schoolwork. I knew I couldn't monopolize her time.

"Luv you Bella." She said simply.

"Luv you too." I said back, and the call ended from her end. I looked down at the phone and then searched around. "Carlisle?"

"I'm here." He said loudly enough for me to hear. He ran back and took the phone from me.

"Why can I control my thirst?" I asked, and he shook his head.

"That is a question I have been mulling since you awakened. Your first action wasn't to thrash and beg for blood. Instead you kissed Edward. I don't know, maybe it is your gift." Carlisle said thoughtfully, his head tilted in contemplation.

"Gift? You mean like Edward reading minds?" The term was descriptive without actually meaning anything. Did he mean talent, or something more?

"Yes, exactly. Occasionally one of our kind awakens with an ability, usually unique. Our family is blessed with two members with gifts, and perhaps you are a third. We can call our cousin up in Denali if you like, he can sense the talents of others."

"Oh kay. So maybe I have a superpower?" I hadn't really absorbed what Edward had told me about reading minds, and it still sounded absurd, but at the same time I was standing which was a medical impossibility in the human world. This world seemed mysterious and strange… and wonderful.

"Perhaps you could label it as such. As you know Edward can read minds, and Alice has visions of the future, the past and frustratingly of the present as well. Jasper, who is no longer with us, could read and control emotions." Carlisle smiled, clearly happy to be a part of my life again.

"Alright, creepy and admittedly cool. So, you… we have cousins?" I had to correct myself, I was a part of the family now. Carlisle beamed at me and nodded.

"Yes. We're are not biologically related if that is what you mean, but they share our values and we consider them family. There are five of them currently, Tanya is the eldest and is effectively their leader. Kate and Irina are her sisters for all intents and purposes, having been turned specifically to be a part of their family. Carmen and Eleazar joined them much later but adapted to our way of life rather quickly. Kate and Eleazar have gifts, and Eleazar is the one who can sense abilities." Carlisle decided short and simple rather than going deep into family history was a better choice.

"They sound fascinating. Did you teach them?" I kind of attributed everything to Carlisle, I wouldn't even be surprised if he was the great vampire overlord.

"Not at all, they came to the decision on their own after centuries. It is unusual, but not entirely unheard of. My time among the Volturi showed me that every one of us unique, and each vampire must make a choice at some point to embrace their nature or resist it." We continued to walk, and I held onto the question I immediately wanted to ask as he continued. "I have found that those of us who choose not to feed off of humanity have closer and more human ties, my coven is not drawn together out of some form of loyalty or necessity, but by love for one another."

"Coven, Volturi, I guess I have a lot to learn." I smiled over at him, hoping he would take the hint. He smiled graciously in understanding.

"Most groups of vampires call themselves covens. I suppose it is almost a designated term, like a flock of birds or a gaggle of geese." He suggested, pausing and giving me a chance to interject.

"Or a murder of crows." I added softly.

"Heh, yes. The Volturi are arguably the first coven, and undisputedly the most powerful. They value art, literature and above all the law. They have an elite guard of gifted vampires that they send out to enforce our laws when something draws the attention of the human world. Of course, they have no regard for human life, it was why I eventually left them. For their all their refinement, I found them merciless and brutal in their treatment of anyone not like us." He shook his head. "Don't get me wrong, I respect the Volturi, I just hope I'm never sitting in front of them in judgement."

"Because of Angela?" I guessed.

"Yes, her knowledge of our kind is forbidden. If they were to find out about her, she would have to be turned or killed. Which brings me to a bit of a touché subject, what are your thoughts on Angela joining us at some point in the future?" The question made me almost stop in place, his tone careful and almost dispassionate.

"I thought it was rude to talk about turning humans?" I pursed my lips and glanced at him suspiciously.

"As a practical matter for debate, there is a reason why I told her. Esme already thinks of her as another daughter, you and Alice love her. Emmett and Edward both adore her, and even Rosalie enjoys her company. To say she isn't already a part of our lives would be insulting to her." His argument made sense, but I couldn't agree.

"Right now, I don't know. Maybe in a few years after college depending on where her life takes her. I hope she is far away from us by then, and out of danger." I said feeling a deep need to protect her.

"You sound like Edward." I shot him a glare, he held up his hands. "Just making a point."

"Fine, yes. I feel protective of my friend. My human friend." I said with a frown. "And not to put too fine a point on it, but the entire reason I'm angry with Edward is that he didn't protect me."

"Bella, Edward loves you. He hadn't figured that out before the crash, when it happened, he fought the impulse to save you so that he could save our family. It was an impossible decision, if he had run to rescue you in front of entire parking lot of humans, we could've easily been exposed. The split second of time he had to mull over the choice was all he had. I understand your anger, I respect it. But I can see his point of view as well, and it is not as if he doesn't regret that choice with every waking moment." It was the same argument I heard from Edward, just more nuanced. With a clearer head it was entirely valid. I just wasn't sure how to get past it.

"Let's get back. I should probably talk to him." I looked over and he nodded. We picked up the pace and were back at the house in minutes. Edward was in the living room, but as he saw me approach, he got up and started towards his room.

"Please wait, I want to talk." He looked over, and a look of gratitude washed over his features. He walked outside and I motioned towards one of the patio chairs. We sat across from each other for almost a minute before I started.

"Okay. I know all the sides now, and I've been giving it a lot of thought. As I see it, we cannot be together right now. There's too much emotion, both good and bad. Sorting all that out will take time, and I don't know if I will ever be able to fully let go of my anger. However, you are a part of my family now. I don't really know what the future will bring us. We may find ourselves together, because I do love you. I just don't know if I'm in love with you anymore. It almost feels like your choice, broke something, that intangible thing we had between us. That being said, I have no desire to hurt you, or make your life impossible. You don't have to leave the room in my presence, we talk and interact and maybe that will be enough to bridge whatever gap there is between us. In other words, Edward, I forgive you." He listened patiently, never reacting or trying to put in a defensive argument. When I was done he smiled at me, as if I had given him his world back.

"Thank you." The words were true, heartfelt and above all genuine. So much so that I felt I had to reply.

"This life is possible because of you. So, thank you Edward." I smiled at him, and a small twinge of regret balled up in the pit of my stomach. I already missed him, even though I never truly had him.

"Would you like your birthday present?" He asked out of nowhere, and I almost shook my head before thinking better of it.

"Why not." I said with a small smile. He got up smoothly and nodded towards the house, his left-hand twitching slightly likely from the impulse to hold out his hand for me. He moved towards the piano set up in the corner, sat down with a grace that still gave me chills and placed his hands on the ivory keys. I could hear the house join us in the living room. It started slowly, and soon I closed my eyes as the most beautiful melody I'd ever heard washed over me.

I felt Alice move up next to me, and together we wrapped our arms around each other's waist, and swayed to the music. I could literally hear his love pouring from the piano, and I knew he had written it for me. As it ended, I finally opened my eyes and scanned the room, everyone was smiling, except Alice whose face had turned to stone. Her eyes locked and almost empty. I realized then that I was actually holding her up. For several seconds I held her in horror.

"Alice?" I said in a panic.

"She's having a vision." Rose explained in a slightly snide tone of voice.

"Oh, so this is normal? For her?" I looked around, and Carlisle half nodded.

"Yes, although she is usually fully aware and able to speak when she has one. This is a bit unusual. Edward?" Carlisle explained quickly.

"I can't see her vision, but it has something to do with the visitor, he is arriving soon. There's something about him that is interfering with her ability I think." Edward frowned and looked as if he were concentrating hard. Then suddenly Alice twitched and blinked a couple of times.

"Holy shit. What the hell was that?" She said looking up at me.

"Hell if I know." I said with a shrug.

"I'm okay, I think." Alice got herself situated and stood up, although she didn't disengage with me.

"What did you see?" Carlisle spoke up and I glanced over at him briefly before returning my gaze to back towards Alice.

"I'm not sure, I saw fire and death. If we don't change the course of events, we're on, then some of us will die, and I can't see how it happens." I looked up at Edward, his eyes were closed, and his face was a mask of devastation.

"You didn't see anything that would give us a clue?" Carlisle continued, and then Alice closed her eyes. After a second, she shook her head.

"No, I can't see anything clearly, it was cloudy with snippets of images. They were very dark, and I really don't want to think about them." Alice shook her head again in protest, and then looked like she was crying although no tears fell from her eyes. Then she took a deep breath and her expression shifted.

"By the way it's almost nine. Our visitor should be arriving shortly." Alice turned to me and gave me a peck on the cheek. "Thanks for keeping me from hitting the ground." Then almost too quickly, unwrapped herself from me and adjusted her outfit as if looking presentable was the most important thing in the world. In a matter of seconds she looked perfectly normal, for Alice. I looked around and a thought occurred to me then, if our strange visitor was human should I make myself scarce? Alice almost chuckled and shook her head.

"There is no reason for you to hide Bella, he is one of us." She smiled at me, and I suddenly felt like I was beginning to understand her. To live with that kind of gift, it had to be equal amounts blessing and curse.

Then a firm knock came at the front door. Carlisle raised his hand and we all followed him. I felt my anticipation peak as the simple act of reaching for the door handle felt like it took forever. The door opened on a beautiful man with long straight white hair and mismatched blue and brown eyes. For a second, I mistook him for human, until I caught a whiff of his scent. There was no mistaking his vampiric nature. He smiled at us all, and then quickly examined our faces with interest, finally resting on mine for several seconds before speaking.

"Good evening. I imagine my coming here is both random and unexpected. I am new to the area and I would like to introduce myself. My name is Mason, and it's a great pleasure to meet all of you." Then he bowed his head slightly in greeting and waited for us to react.


Author's Note: Before anyone responds, I have strong feelings about original characters. The minor problem with Fan Fiction is that while you can shift and bend characters and personalities to a degree, it is relatively impossible to introduce a new element without introducing a new character. While true I could try and draw from the existing canon, but there are no characters in Twilight that match Mason. He is something SM never explored.

Thank you for reading! Please review, I've loved hearing all your thoughts on the story so far. Please check my profile for the release date on the next chapter.