Disclaimer: I don't own How To Train Your Dragon, and I never will. All rights go to DreamWorks, who made the movies and the series, and Cressida Cowell, the author of the books.

A/N: Here's a new bunch of short stories about the hybrids trying to navigate life in a Viking village with a bunch of very confused (unchanged) dragons that witnessed everything.


Stages of maturity

For once, Toothless got curious about humans and wanted to ask Hiccup some more questions about humans. He had so much more to learn. But Hiccup had (rather rudely) refused to answer any of his questions and sent Toothless off to his father. Stoick, (quite rightfully) was confused.

"Why are you here with me?" the chieftain asked. "Where's Hiccup?"

"I wanted to ask Hiccup some questions about humans, but he said he was busy and I should ask someone else," Toothless sighed.

"But that's not fair! You've been helping Hiccup find things out about dragons!" Stoick blurted out.

"Tell me about it," Toothless huffed, rolling his eyes at Hiccup's behaviour. "Anyway, I have a few questions about the stages of maturity you humans go through and since Hiccup is off doing nerdy, dangerous stuff without me, I was wondering . . . maybe . . . if you could answer them." Initially, Stoick was about to say no and send Toothless on his way. He was a very busy man, after all. But then he thought about it and eventually said yes. This was the perfect way to mess with Hiccup, using his beloved, hopelessly trusting Night Fury to do it.

"Of course, Toothless. What would you like to know?" Stoick asked.

"What are the stages of maturity a human goes through in their life, from beginning to end?" Toothless asked.

"There's infant, toddler, young child, older child, adolescent (also called teenager), young adult, mature adult and senior, in that exact order," Stoick explained. Toothless, like his rider before him, was absolutely enthralled. This was easy! Humans used some of the same words for their infants as dragons did! (Not senior, though. They never said that. They just said old.)

"I'm a little confused, but not by what you told me. Hiccup acts like a child, and then gets mad at me for seeing him and then treating him like a child. Which stage of maturity is this?" Toothless asked.

"Hiccup's a teenager, so this is perfectly normal for him. You shouldn't worry about it, " Stoick reassured, trying not to give himself away by smiling or laughing. (His name was quite literally Stoick, after all.) Misinforming Toothless to mess with his son's head would be nothing short of hilarious in the long run. Sure, Toothless was basically collateral damage once it was over, but Hiccup deserved it all for leaving Toothless with nothing but his own curiosity. If curiosity killed the cat, then it could certainly do a Night Fury a lot of harm. And Toothless, at least, would find it funny once it all blew over. Hiccup . . . not so much. Hiccup took his research very seriously. Everyone knew that. Almost the entire village had been on the receiving end of a major Hiccup freak-out at some point, Toothless more than anyone (especially after he placed Hiccup's more dangerous and eccentric inventions on the top shelf where he couldn't reach).

"OK!" Toothless chirped, as he went to tell Hiccup what he'd just learned. Stoick held back laughter. This was going to be nothing short of amazing to witness. Mean, admittedly, but also very funny.


Toothless saw Hiccup working in the forge, so he reluctantly adhered to the hurriedly-made rule banning him from going inside and waited outside for him. Hiccup noticed that Toothless was waiting for him and went outside to greet the slightly gullible Night Fury/human hybrid. "Hey, buddy!" Hiccup called from inside the forge. "What did you learn about humans, Toothless?"

"I was told that there is a stage of maturity for humans where they act just like a small child, but don't want to be treated like one," Toothless reported happily.

"And what stage of maturity would that be?" Hiccup asked, with absolutely no idea about what was going to come out of Toothless' mouth next. He never had any idea what Toothless was going to say, so he was always in a state of shock. As far as this was concerned, he couldn't wait until the berries wore off.

"Teenagers, apparently," Toothless replied. Hiccup's eyes bugged out of his head with shock.

"What?" Hiccup spluttered.

"Did I say something wrong?" Toothless asked, confused by Hiccup's reaction to what he had learned.

"That is not true! The person who told you this is a liar!" Hiccup shouted. "Who told you, Toothless? Who?"

"Your father told me!" Toothless replied, not knowing what was going on but still being a little scared. "You can't call your father a liar or you'll be in a lot of trouble!" This stopped Hiccup in his tracks. Toothless was right. Insulting one's father was basically a death sentence for Vikings. Men had been publicly lynched for much less serious things.

"Why did my dad tell you this? It's all wrong," Hiccup told the perplexed hybrid.

"It is?" Toothless asked, utterly perplexed. "But your father is human. How could he be wrong?"

"I don't even know!" Hiccup yelled. He looked like he was about to freak out. Toothless backed away, slightly fearful. Hiccup was angry. Very, very angry. "Toothless, when you went to go find someone to teach you about humans and the way they grow up, did you go and see my dad?" Toothless nodded. "And none of it seemed off to you? Absolutely nothing?" Toothless shook his head. Hiccup knew that Toothless had been tricked by his father, who thought that misinforming Toothless would be funny. Toothless, however, did not know that he had been tricked.

"I can't correct him if I don't know anything about it myself. That's why I'm asking in the first place. I'd just have to take his word for it," Toothless pointed out. He was right in that regard, but Hiccup still couldn't wrap his head around how Toothless thought everything his dad had just told him was true. He failed to remember how sweet, trusting and unassuming Toothless was, and it came back to bite him.

"But all of this is clearly wrong! How are you this stupid?" Hiccup blurted out. Toothless' face shifted from confusion to hurt. Hiccup immediately knew that of all the things he could have said, that was the wrong one. He tried to apologize to his buddy, but he just couldn't get the right words out. By the time he knew what to say, Toothless had gone, walking in the other direction. The Night Fury/human hybrid looked utterly heartbroken, and it was all Hiccup's fault. "Wait! Toothless, wait! I didn't mean it! I swear!" Hiccup yelled. But Toothless had already gone, leaving no hint of which direction he'd been in.

He had to fix this.


"Lad, what's the rush?" Gobber asked, as he saw Hiccup go from person to person asking if they'd seen Toothless and which direction he'd been going when they saw him.

"Gobber, have you seen Toothless anywhere?" Hiccup asked, talking very fast. Something was wrong.

"He was headed near the cove," Gobber informed. This was a lucky break.

"Thanks!" Hiccup blurted out, running over to the cove. He didn't look where he was going and bumped into Hookfang.

"What are you doing?" Hookfang asked. "Hey, how's Toothless?"

"I don't know, I'm not sure where he is," Hiccup admitted. "I heard he was going to the cove."

"That's where I saw him going," Stormfly offered. "Why isn't he with you? You're usually together all the time." Hiccup stiffened, and knew he'd have to tell them why he and Toothless had been separated.

"We . . . had an argument and I called him stupid. He's gone somewhere to think or . . . something like that," Hiccup admitted. The other hybrids went from looking relatively happy to staring at him coldly. That was when Hiccup knew that these dragons really, really cared about Toothless. Hookfang rolled up his sleeves and almost lunged at Hiccup, but Barf and Belch held him back. The girls refused to look at him, staring at the floor just because it meant not looking him in the eyes. Before a fight started, Hiccup sidestepped away from them and went to the cove.

Hiccup found Toothless upside down in a tree, either asleep or trying to. He heard a sniffle. "I can't be near you. You'll get mad and yell at me and call me stupid again," Toothless whispered hoarsely. His face was pale (he couldn't tell if that was from being upside down or just shock) and there was sadness in his big, green eyes. They were also tinged with redness. He'd been crying. Hiccup hated how he'd talked to Toothless earlier. He had to make this right somehow. He just had no real idea how. Words were not his strong point.

"Toothless, come down from there," Hiccup pleaded. "You'll get hurt if you stay up there."

"I'll be fine," Toothless denied. "I've climbed higher trees than this."

"I'm worried about you, bud," Hiccup sighed. "I came here because I wanted to apologize to you." Toothless climbed up the tree, going higher than he had before. Hiccup's heart sank.

"Really?" Toothless asked. He didn't budge, though.

"Of course," Hiccup insisted. "I am so, so sorry for being so mean to you. Nothing like this will ever happen again, I swear it on my life." Hiccup was ready to go up the tree himself and hug Toothless, but then Toothless came down and petted Hiccup before hugging him. Toothless knew Hiccup was sorry and the skinny brunette seemed to be on the verge of tears from pure guilt.

"OK, Hiccup, I believe you," Toothless smiled, before walking home with him. As far as Toothless was concerned, everything was fine. For Hiccup, it wouldn't be anywhere near that simple.


Ever since, Hiccup noticed Toothless being lured away by the other hybrids so he wouldn't be around Hiccup for long. Out of guilt and because he wanted Toothless to stay with him, Hiccup began to do little things for Toothless like get him the food that he liked or not give him more chores, just so he stayed there with him and not the other hybrids. But his efforts were being outdone every time. The other hybrids would feed him a bit of everything they could find so he didn't eat Hiccup's food, meaning Toothless was so stuffed with food that he couldn't move and couldn't go back to Hiccup. It was calculated, it was detailed . . . and it was working. Hiccup knew first hand how easy it was to distract Toothless with creature comforts like the tasty fish he liked and somewhere cosy to sleep. Right now, Hiccup was getting Toothless an especially cosy blanket. Toothless seemed cold earlier (he'd been shivering) and although he wanted to get it himself, Hiccup insisted just so Toothless would be comfortable.

"Hey, Toothless, found the blanket you . . . wanted." Hiccup's voice trailed off after he saw the other hybrids surrounding Toothless, who was sleeping peacefully while wrapped in other blankets that they had gotten for him. These other blankets seemed to be of much better quality than what Hiccup had hurriedly found for him. They slowly turned to look at him, glaring.

"And why are you here?" Hookfang growled, as he got up. Barf, Belch, Stormfly and Meatlug stayed with Toothless, glaring at Hiccup from a distance. "Leave him alone. Now."

"Look, I just want to see Toothless and give him this blanket," Hiccup insisted. They weren't buying it at all. To them, Hiccup Horrendous Haddock the Third was nothing more and nothing less than bad news. Toothless had to be kept away from him at all costs.

"Don't bother. He's with us now, and we're going to give him everything he needs," Stormfly smugly stated.

"You're going to upset him again, aren't you?" Barf accused. "You're no good for him."

"Stay away from our Toothless, you cowardly bully," Belch ordered.

"Cowardly bully? Aren't you overreacting a little? It was just an argument," Hiccup blurted out. Hookfang lunged at him, barely held back by Barf, Belch, Stormfly and Meatlug.

"You'll never understand, will you?" Hookfang yelled, as the others did their best to hold him back. "Toothless loves you! He thinks you're the smartest, coolest, bravest person ever, and you treat him like that! You, Hiccup, are a moronic, self-righteous, arrogant little-"

"What's going on?" Toothless asked. He had been woken up by the arguing between his rider and his friends and was naturally worried. Everyone stared at him, then at themselves, feeling guilty. "I heard yelling and moving. You weren't fighting, were you?" Everyone involved tried to make it seem like nothing was going to happen. The other hybrids let go of Hookfang and everyone tried to look like they weren't about to beat Hiccup to a bloody pulp.

"No, just some Vikings getting really, really drunk," Hiccup lied. He had to change the subject before Toothless got worried. "Here, got you the blanket you wanted."

"Hiccup, you got me the cosy blanket like you promised! Thank you! You're the best!" Toothless smiled. He hugged Hiccup really hard (hard enough for Hiccup to feel his ribs cracking), took the blanket and snuggled into it, still feeling sleepy. After seeing that, the other hybrids felt guilty. Toothless really knew that Hiccup wasn't about to do anything to him, meaning the one-time argument really was just an argument. Ignoring their attempts to apologize, Hiccup headed over to Toothless, who was all too willing to snuggle. That was how they slept, limbs intertwined and breathing synchronized. It was adorable, and looking at them made them all feel so ashamed of the way they talked to Hiccup. Toothless had forgiven him so easily; why hadn't they?

"We'll need to talk to those two," Hookfang sighed.


Hiccup was pleased to note that Toothless wasn't being stolen away from him any longer. He could finally have his buddy all to himself. But then he noticed that none of the other hybrids were going anywhere near them. In fact, he hadn't seen them anywhere. Toothless was getting worried.

"Hiccup, do you know where Hookfang is?" Toothless asked. "He said that he was going to wrestle with me today and I can't find him."

"No," Hiccup replied.

And then they showed up. Not as cocky or sure of themselves as before, they approached with caution. Hookfang chose to be the distraction, leaving the rest to talk to Hiccup about Toothless.

"Toothless, little guy!" Hookfang greeted. "Come with me; I promised that I would wrestle with you, and now I've got that chance." Toothless jumped up and allowed himself to be taken away by Hookfang, leaving Hiccup with the other hybrids.

"What do you want?" Hiccup asked, the moment Toothless was out of earshot. He was mad at every last one of them, and with good reason. Meatlug spoke first.

"Hiccup, we need to talk to you about you and Toothless . . . and how wrong we were," she admitted. Stormfly, Barf and Belch nodded behind her. "We're protective of Toothless because he's like a little brother to us. Smaller, very energetic, prone to trouble." Hiccup's anger died down. He could see their point.

"And taking Toothless from you is wrong. You always seem to make him so happy," Stormfly confessed. "There's only one solution that we can think of: we'll have to share him with you." This caught Hiccup by surprise.

"How do we . . . share him, exactly?" he blurted out.

"We all need to find some way to play with him that he likes," Barf and Belch chorused. "We just don't know what that thing is." That was when Hiccup had an idea.

"How about we check on Toothless now and see what he feels like doing?" Hiccup asked. The other hybrids nodded, and they went looking for Hookfang and Toothless. But what they found was nothing like what they were expecting to see. They crept over to the arena, expecting to see Hookfang and Toothless wrestling. They . . . weren't wrestling. Hookfang was on top of Toothless, tickling him senseless with his hands and letting his tail poke and prod his belly button.

"GAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! HOOKFANG, IT-MMMPH!" Toothless went from laughing hysterically to being forcefully and effectively silenced by Hookfang's palm over his mouth. "MMMMMMMPH! NNNNNNNNNNPH! MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM!"

"Oh hush, Toothless, I know you love this," Hookfang taunted. "Besides, you can't move and you'll be getting lots and lots of tickles until I decide when to stop playing with you. And nobody can hear you beg and laugh except me anyway." Hookfang smiled, removed his hand and continued to torture Toothless, who could do nothing but laugh hysterically, too far away from other people to be detected and rescued. Both believed that nobody would ever hear Toothless' hysterical howls of laughter. All of them had the same devious idea at the same time, and with that, they quietly sneaked out so Hookfang and Toothless could 'wrestle' in peace. They now knew exactly how to bond with their precious little Toothless.


"Toothless," Hiccup cooed, poking the hybrid's side with a single finger. Toothless squeaked and turned around, to see that it was only Hiccup. His shoulders slumped with relief, and his tail wagged like that of a puppy.

"Hiccup, what are you doing?" Toothless asked. "You seem awfully playful today and you're not normally like that."

"There's a game we want to play with you, Toothless," Hiccup confided. Toothless smiled happily. He got to play with all his friends with this special new game, and it seemed fun too. "Now come with me to the cove." Toothless, excited now, allowed himself to be steered towards the cove, far away from people. They could have some privacy while they played.

"Is it supposed to be so far away from the village?" Toothless asked. "I'm a little confused."

"This game is a little loud," Hiccup explained, and Toothless nodded. That all made sense, and Hiccup would never lie to him. But still, it did make him wonder what it was about this game that made it loud. Hookfang, Stormfly, Meatlug and Barf and Belch were already there, along with some rope. Toothless was now very confused and a little scared. What was going on?

"What are the rules for this game?" Toothless asked. Hiccup, Hookfang, Stormfly, Meatlug, Barf and Belch all grinned. The innocent-minded Night Fury was a little confused and scared.

"Toothless, you need to sit down while we just poke and prod different parts of your body to test which parts are the strongest," Hookfang explained. Toothless looked like he was about to argue with somebody about this rule when Hookfang fixed him with a simple look that made him quieten down and sit on the floor, just the way he had been told.

"OK," Toothless agreed.

"And you need to put your hands behind your head," Hookfang added. Without question, Toothless did as he was told. And that was when they pounced, all of them poking and prodding Toothless' worst spots. The poor little Night Fury collapsed laughing, sweet and innocent laughter echoing throughout the cove. He bucked and tried to get away, but Hookfang held him still while torturing his sweet little hatchling of a friend.

"HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! WHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAT AHAHAHAHAHAHAHARE YOHOHOHOHOU DOHOHOHOHOHOHOING?" Toothless laughed, squirming and giggling. Hookfang knew that Toothless' begging was all for show, since his tail wagged the whole time while they tortured him. And while he was still enjoying this, Hookfang saw no reason to go easy on him. His hands explored the many folds and crevices of Toothless' wings, while a tail navigated every single nook and cranny of Toothless' belly button.

"You are not going anywhere, you hear me? Not until we're done with you," Hiccup smiled, squeezing Toothless' sides. Toothless let out another sensitive shriek and nearly collapsed into a giggling wreck. Hookfang simply laid him down on the floor and continued torturing him.

"Oh, you are such a cutie," Stormfly cooed. "I don't know why we never did this to you before."

"Can we do this to him all the time?" Barf and Belch chorused, as they squeezed and traced the sensitive flesh of his feet with their fingers. Toothless screamed and thrashed around, but they wouldn't be letting him go just yet. He was just adorable, smiling and giggling while he thrashed around on the floor. The tears of mirth in his eyes were leaking down his face and his lungs burned. That was when Hookfang, the one most used to playing with Toothless this way, stopped. Playing became soothing, and nobody quite knew why. But Hookfang was the one who was (unofficially) in control, and the others followed his lead. He had the most experience with this sort of play, after all.

"Stop, stop! No more!" Hookfang ordered. "He's too tired. We have to let him rest." Toothless was allowed a reprieve for just a little while, and his eyes drooped downwards. His breathing slowed and evened out, and he started to curl up into a ball. They began to stroke the adolescent Night Fury, and Hiccup stayed close to him.

"So sweet. Toothless, are you tired?" Hiccup teased.

"So tired," Toothless yawned. "You're all mean." They chuckled and helped get Toothless up onto Hookfang's shoulder so he could be carried home. "Stop going so rough on me." Hookfang grinned and scratched Toothless under the chin, making him squeal and stay quiet. Soon, he fell asleep.


"What happened to Toothless?" Stoick asked, when Hookfang carried him up the stairs to his bed. Toothless was obviously unconscious, which worried Stoick. He thought it was suspicious to see Toothless asleep so early. Had he been hurt in any way?

"He got tired while we played, so Hookfang's carrying him," Hiccup explained. "Poor little guy."

"Hiccup, you can only call someone little if they're shorter than you. Toothless doesn't qualify," Stoick sighed. "In fact, nobody does. Except for everyone under the age of ten, and they're not fair game because they're so young."

"For Thor's sake," Hiccup sighed, as he went upstairs to see Toothless, who was peacefully asleep, snuggling into a blanket. Hiccup smiled and patted his head.

"Goodnight, Toothless," Hiccup sighed.


Idiot tree

"Hey, look at that tree," Snotlout said, randomly pointing up at a huge tree one day for no apparent reason. "I am going to climb it to prove my manliness to the rest of the village."

"Do you have to climb the tree? Why don't you do something more productive instead?" Hiccup asked. "This can't possibly end well."

"Snotlout, don't you have enough stupid things under your belt?" Astrid asked.

"Did someone mention stupid?" the twins chorused. "What's the plan?"

"I wanna see if I can climb that tree," Snotlout told them.

"We're in," they chorused, immediately.

"Popcorn?" Toothless asked, appearing out of nowhere with a huge wooden bowl filled to the brim with popcorn. Snotlout grinned at him. For once, he agreed with Toothless' thinking.

"Of course! The people of Berk should be allowed to feast on popcorn as they watch me - I mean us - conquer this tree," Snotlout agreed. "Quickly, Night Fury, fetch more popcorn for the great people of Berk!"

"I hate the way you talk to me, but I love how I don't have to be near you," Toothless remarked, as he ran off. While he was gone, Snotlout, Ruffnut and Tuffnut decided to start their perilous, uncertain journey up the great tree, while their friends looked on and told them that this was the stupidest thing they could possibly do. Hiccup used those exact words.

"This is the stupidest thing you could possibly do," Hiccup told them. Snotlout sneered at him.

Their friends were absolutely right.


"Help!" Snotlout wailed. "Help! Somebody help me! We're all stuck!"

"Send help!" Tuffnut pleaded.

"I regret everything!" Ruffnut sorrowfully declared. Toothless, at the bottom of the tree, ate popcorn and laughed at them all. That was when Hookfang, Barf and Belch arrived.

"Why are our riders all stuck up one tree?" Hookfang asked.

"Snotlout wanted to climb it to show off his manliness. Ruffnut and Tuffnut went with him for some reason. None of them know how to get down," Toothless explained. "They told me to get popcorn for the people of Berk to feast on. Now they're stuck in a tree."

"I guess we're going to have to rescue them, won't we?" Barf said to Belch.

"I guess we do," Belch replied. "Us three will rescue our hapless and desperate riders from the damned tree."

"Yeah!" Hookfang, Barf and Belch cheered as they, like their riders before them, started climbing the same tree.

"They are so going to get stuck," Meatlug sighed.

"Shush, Meatlug I need to see this," Stormfly grinned.

"I'm off to get more popcorn," Toothless replied, scurrying away.


Soon after, Snotlout, Ruffnut, Tuffnut, Hookfang, Barf and Belch were all stuck in the same tree. "Someone else needs to send help!" Snotlout wailed.

"I'll do it!" Toothless volunteered, running to the Great Hall and went to find Stoick and Gobber. "Sir, I have good news, bad news and worse news."

"Toothless, what the Thor happened?" Stoick asked.

"The bad news is Snotlout, Ruffnut and Tuffnut all got stuck in a tree to show off how tough they were. The good news is that their dragons went up the tree to help them get out of the tree. The worse news is that now they are all stuck up in one tree and sent me to get someone to help," Toothless explained. There were two very different reactions. Stoick facepalmed at the stupidity of his nephew, his nephew's stupid friends and their dragons. Gobber laughed hysterically.

"All of them?" Gobber laughed. "In one tree? This I have got to see!"

"I'll get a ladder," Stoick sighed. "Gobber, go see if they're OK. For all we know, they could end up falling out of the tree at any second. Bring a ladder with you."

"Yes, sir," Gobber snickered, hobbling away to take in the hilarious spectacle offered to him by the gods. Stoick never explicitly said that Gobber had to be diplomatic and calm when helping him with his chief stuff, but it was heavily implied. However, when he saw all of them hanging out of the same tree, backsides in the air just waiting to be pelted with fruit . . . he couldn't help but laugh at them all.

"BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! WHAT HAVE YOU MUTTONHEADS DONE TO END UP LIKE THIS?" Gobber laughed. Hiccup rolled his eyes.

"I warned them. Just wanted to make that clear," Hiccup remarked, not wanting anything more to do with the already stupid scenario. Toothless was eating popcorn. "Toothless!" Hiccup scolded. "Stop eating popcorn!"

"But I'm hungry! And this is really, really funny!" Toothless protested.

"There's nothing funny about finding out how to get them down, Toothless, trust me," Gobber told him. He'd had to do this before, and it wasn't very funny if you had to get them down. (Laughing about it over a pint of ale later was always acceptable, though.)

"Do we have to get them down, though? We could leave them there and call it the idiot tree," Toothless suggested.

"We can hear you, you know!" Snotlout yelled.

"And for the record, Toothless, that is not called an idiot tree!" Hiccup corrected, pinching the bridge of his nose the same way as his father.

"Sure it is. If a tree full of apples is called an apple tree, then a tree full of idiots is called an idiot tree," Toothless explained, feeling rather proud of himself.

"Well, he's not wrong," Gobber pointed out, still snickering at the idiotic teenagers and hybrids.

"You are so not helping," Hiccup sighed, facepalming.

"Right. I'll get a ladder," Gobber sighed.

"Yes, Gobber!" Hiccup congratulated.

"And at least ten people who have wanted to see this for a very long time," Gobber added.

"No, Gobber!" Hiccup told him. Toothless was pointing upwards and laughing hysterically at them all.

"Toothless, shut up!" Hookfang ordered.

"Come down and say it to my face!" Toothless laughed. "Oh right; I forgot; you can't!"

"Oh, what I wouldn't give to throttle you right now, you little smart mouth," Barf and Belch growled in unison. Toothless was still relatively safe at the bottom of the tree, so he continued to laugh at them all, waving up every once in a while.

"That little jerk!" Ruffnut growled. Toothless grinned, saluted them, and ran in circles around the so-called idiot tree before leaving.

"Finally! He's gone!" Tuffnut celebrated. This celebration was to be short-lived, as a crowd soon began to form. Jokes were thrown around like axes in a traditional Viking argument.

"You reckon the next time we get a large downpour of rain, the tree will grow more and sprout more idiots?"

"Are they ripe for the picking yet?"

"Can we sell them to villages we have alliances with that don't have their own village idiot?"

"Can we sell them to villages we don't have alliances with to establish an alliance?"

"Sell them? That's insane! What we should be doing is renting them out across the archipelago to anyone willing to take them in for a month of extra stupidity!"

"If we're going to sell anyone, let's start with the Thorston twins so we don't have to deal with any more Loki Day pranks!" A loud roar of approval rippled through the crowd. Clearly, this idea was pretty popular with the locals. The twins gulped with fear.

"And just to be on the safe side, let's sell their dragon along with them as a package deal!" another Viking yelled. Barf and Belch looked to each other with despair. They didn't know that the Vikings were teasing them.

"Let's sell Snotlout first so he stops running around the village yelling 'Snotlout, Snotlout, oi, oi, oi'!" Astrid suggested, grinning. Stormfly and Meatlug were eating Toothless' popcorn, giggling hysterically at the events unfolding before them.

"We're going to be sold one by one!" Hookfang lamented.

"They won't sell you one by one! That's not how Vikings operate!" the resident Night Fury hybrid reassured.

"Oh, good," Barf and Belch sighed, relieved.

"They'll sell you all at once and get it over and done with!" Toothless corrected, to the roars of the other Vikings. The idiots screamed with terror.

"Just get us down so nobody tries to sell us, you twit!" Snotlout begged.

"I'm not going to help you if you keep calling me a twit," Toothless negotiated. "By the way, you are in no position to call anyone a twit when you are all stuck in a tree and we are down here. Safe, sound and not looking stupid, like you."

"Shut up, Toothless!" Hookfang huffed.

"And you are definitely not in a position to say that," Toothless told him. "Just wait for someone to come over with a ladder."

"Ohh, so that was why Stoick wanted me to be here," Gobber suddenly remembered.

"Then what the Thor were you doing here?" Toothless asked.

"Enjoying the rare sight of all these idiots up one tree," Gobber explained.

"But that's my job!" Toothless blurted out.

"And drawing this scene for posterity is my job!" Hiccup blurted out, as he doodled the scene on a scrap of paper.

"Yeah, yeah, whatever, muttonheads," Snotlout blathered.

"SHUT UP!" everyone yelled. Snotlout finally shut up. Gobber let the ladder lean against the tree and, slowly (he's missing an arm and a leg, be nice), climbed up it. One by one, all the idiots were carried down the tree to the laughter and cheering of other Vikings. Hiccup rolled his eyes at all of them.

"The next thing I hear out of your mouth had better not be 'I told you so'," Ruffnut snapped. Hiccup smiled.

"What made you think I would say that?" Hiccup asked.

"Well, you did say it earlier," Snotlout pointed out.

"If you could hear me, why didn't you listen?" Hiccup asked. He had a good point there. The morons stammered, trying to utter a decent answer before thinking it was wiser to stay silent. "I thought you'd say that."

"But we didn't even say anything," Ruffnut pointed out.

"My point exactly," Hiccup chuckled. "Come on, Toothless, let's go home. I've had enough stupid for one day."

"I've had enough stupid to last me a lifetime," Toothless huffed, as the two went home. After seeing so much stupidity, they would have to sleep it all off.

Also, Hiccup wasn't sure whether he should sell the drawings he made or hang them up for free. Decisions, decisions.