The Courage To Love Him
A/N: I so love you guys. I hope everyone is staying safe. I tried to make this a longer chapter but it's so much to be said, and I love keeping you guy's attention. This chapter will answer a lot of unanswered question about past events and conversations. So just know this one has a cliffhanger at the end. I couldn't help myself. It's like I needed to do this. So I don't apologize but I will be loading another chapter soon. I did not proofread so there may be some grammar errors.
Happy Reading!
Chapter 14
"So Livvie Fitzgerald have you guys set a date yet we really should start planning marriage is a big deal?" Maya asks as Liv sits down to have dessert causing everyone at the table to stop and stare at her. The room is so quiet you could hear a pin drop on carpeted flooring.
Liv looks at her mother to see if she's serious "Umm yes May 16th."
"Oh well we better get started on the planning my dear daughter a year could go by so fast." Maya excitedly expresses causing Liv to frown not really liking the fact that since finding out Fitz has money she all of a sudden likes him and is on board with the wedding and the fact she thinks Liv is talking about getting married a year from now, but she keeps her thoughts to herself and will talk with Fitz about it later. "Why the change of heart mom I thought you were not on board with Fitz and I?" Liv inquires
"Oh Livvie dear my biggest concern was you being taken care of financially and Fitz is able to do that. I never want to see my only daughter struggling besides a year from now when the wedding comes I'm sure I will know everything there is to know about Fitz. So Fitz will you be requiring Liv to sign a pre-nup?
But before Fitz could answer he and everyone else at the table damn near chock on either their food or drink. Fitz looks at Liv and sees that she about to go off. The look on her face says everything he needs to know about how she's feeling and it's not good. Liv tosses her fork onto her plate and slowly pushes her chair back from the table before speaking. "Mother first of all we are getting married May 16th as in next month and whether I sign a prenup or not is rude of you to ask and none of your business."
Maya Eli and even Harrison heard nothing but next month in Liv's statement but before anyone could question her on it Maya takes the floor. "Next month, what the hell do you mean next month? Over my dead body will you be getting married next month!" Liv refuses to back down and goes in "You can't tell me what I can and can not do mother I am not a child. I am a grown woman and I make my own decisions."
Eli jumps in "Sweet pea next month is quit soon, can you tell me why?"
Liv without thinking and out of frustration yells out "Because I love him and he loves me, plus it's what I want." Gerry pats Fitz on the knee trying to comfort him as he sees Fitz temper starting to rise as his leg bounces up and down. Eli looks at Fitz and without words Fitz conveys his love for Liv with one look. Plus Eli understood what it was like to fall in love with someone you've barely known. But Maya was not having any of this. She wasn't quite sure why but she felt this thing as she called it with Liv and Fitz was being rushed. But she really hated was the she was no longer able to control Liv's life "What is the rush Livvie? If Fitz really loves you like you say he does then he will be there a year from now?" She expressively shares looking to Fitz for clarity she asks "Fitzgerald what is the rush why do you need to marry my daughter so quickly? How can you possibly be in love with her when you barely know her, she barely knows you?"
Fitz tries to answer "Mrs. Pope I…" But is interrupted by Olivia "No babe, you don't owe her an explanation." Liv stands from her seat "She clearly just doesn't like you. First you pretend he's not fit for me because you assumed he didn't make much money referring to him as a gardener when you clearly know what he does as a profession, then I tell you he's a self-made millionaire and you want to know when's the wedding clearly being fake and not to mention disrespectful with that prenup question. This ends here mother you are being a hypocrite right and I can't with you right now Fitz and I are getting married and you can be a part of my journey or not. I want you to be a part of everything but it's your choice."
Maya not being able to control herself keeps it coming "Olivia Carolyn Pope if you marry this man next month you and I…" In the mist of her rant Eli who has had enough slams his fist onto the table causing all the china to rattle spoons and all. "Maya Marie Pope that is enough!" This causes everyone to jump from being startled. "If you say one more word you will have to deal with me in front of everyone here!" Maya shuts down like a child being check by her father. "Sweet pea… Fitz congratulation and Gerry it's been a pleasure but I need to speak to my wife." Eli shares indicating it's time for everyone to leave. He was angry and Liv Harrison and even Maya knew it.
Everyone stands to leave including Harrison so he waits until he gets outside to ask Liv a very important question. "Umm Livvie can I stay at your place tonight? Plus I really need to talk with you." Without thinking Liv answers "Sure." She then looks to Fitz "Baby are you coming over or should I meet you at your place?" Fitz opens her door "Where you go I go love." He smiles as everyone takes up their positions inside of his car. Liv apologizes for her mother's behavior to both Fitz and Gerry.
Gerry is dropped off at Fitz place and he Liv and Harrison heads to her place. Harrison is amazed at Fitz's home even though he only seen the outside. "You really are rich dude?" Harrison says in awe of what he sees
"I do alright." Fitz responds always humble when it comes to his wealth
Once everyone is settled in Harrison explains to Liv and Fitz about his conversation with Eli after they arrived home from the ball. Eli was in protective father mode about Liv and no nonsense mode with him. Harrison shared that Eli told him it's time for him to stop hiding behind mommy and daddy. That he needed to grow up. He also explained how he was disappointed in how Harrison treated women and he was no longer allowed to bring different women into his home and now that he had graduated and had a good paying job he needed to leave the nest and find a place of his own and that he only had till the end of the month whether he found a place or not. He felt lost. He felt fear because he's never really had to take care of himself. He didn't know what to do or where he would go.
Liv look up at Fitz standing behind the sofa leaning down as he listens. She raises a brow asking a silent question and Fitz answers with a brow raise of his own indicating it's her choice. She turns her attention back to Harrison who's clearly scared. "Is that why you were so quiet at dinner?" "Yeah I should know how to do this Liv but I don't and I feel stupid."
She grabs him into a hug "Oh Harr you're not stupid don't ever say that about yourself. Mommy and daddy clearly enabled you and now daddy's just frustrated with everything, but you don't have to worry you can stay here Fitz and I will help you figure everything out. You may even be able to lease from me soon Fitz and I will be moving together into his place but I'm with daddy no line of women coming and going. You will pay rent and utilities once I move out. I will help you budget. You must keep up the yard and take care of my home. If you can do that little brother I got you…deal?" Harrison smiles and looks up at Fitz then back at Liv "Deal." "Great now you can use the guest room furthest from mines for now. Once I move out you can take the master if you'd like. Please don't paint my house Harry?" Harrison laughs but promises not to change much and not to repaint. Liv hands him the extra key from her key chain.
After their talk Harrison head to the guest room and Liv and Fitz sit and talk. "Are you okay Livvie?" She smiles placing her head on his shoulder "Yeah babe I'm fine. I'm sorry again about my mother." Fitz shifts to find more comfort "its okay Livvie as long as were on the same page and in this together I'm good." Liv looks up and pulls Fitz face down for a kiss. After the kiss Liv notice Fitz mind is somewhere else. "Babe what is it? Something's on your mind I can tell."
Fitz lets his head fall on the back of the sofa and sighs "Liv baby I don't want to come between you and your mother. I feel like since meeting me you and your mom have not been on good terms and now you guys are having full blown arguments about me. What I'm trying to say is maybe waiting to get married is not a bad thing. I love you enough to wait. I hate that you and your mother are at odds because of me. I'm sorry I mess up your plan to be married before you had children. I understand that you want any children you have to have their father's last name and our baby can still have that and then a couple of months later we get married and change your name."
Liv sits up so she can look Fitz directly in the eyes when she speaks to him. "Fitz listen, nothing we do will make my mom happy except to have total control over my decision making and if I do that you and I…" She points you him to herself "Will not be together no matter how much money you have. I really don't believe it's about how much money you make love. It's about race…that fact that you are not black. She won't come right out and say it, but we all including my dad know what she's really saying. Why do you think I was so hung up on finding my perfect IBM? I was raised to think that way; taught to be racist without seeing myself as a racists if that makes sense? I don't have the mind nor energy to fight with my mom over my life. I will never win but I will take charge of my life because I now have a reason to…and that reason is you. I never noticed how much control I had given my mother over my life until I met you, and to be honest because of you, I see the real Maya Pope and the real Olivia Pope."
This brings a smile to Fitz making him push forward with his next question "So, umm you told your brother you're moving in with me…did you really mean that, I mean we never discussed it and I don't want to assume?" "Babe it the next step we are engaged now and it only makes since." "I get that…" "Wait… do you not want to live together should I not have assumed I'd move in with you?" Fitz sees the panic in Liv's face and quickly interjects "No Livvie it's not that at all. I just wanted to be sure you're okay doing this because we just never had a chance to discuss any of this, but I'm all for you moving in with me. I want to share everything I have with you. It just feels like everything is moving so fast…the pregnancy, the proposal, you moving out of your home. You just purchased this house this year and haven't even really broken it in yet. I just don't want you to one day wake up and regret choosing me."
Liv becomes emotional "Babe, I thank you for thinking of me and putting my feeling before your own, but I'm in this for the long haul. We are in this together. I'm engaged to you, and having your baby, I understand that my life plans are a little out of sequence but it is what it is. I've fallen in love with you and will follow you over a cliff, as I told you Mr. you're stuck with me. I'm not giving up my home just moving out of it and in with you and Boom."
"So tomorrow we go the doctor and see our baby? I'm excited are you?"
"Yes especially now that you are going with me and I don't have to do this alone." "Let's finish this in the bedroom before you end up exposing me in front of your brother." Liv smiles as she rubs Fitz erection through his pant "I thought you'd never ask." The two shower and engage in a much needed release several times before retiring to bed.
The Pope's on the other hand did not retired to be for quite some time. Eli was very angry with his wife and he was now ready to tell her so and put his foot down. He's had enough of her high and mighty attitude. Once he was sure his children were gone he turned to Maya who was still sitting at the dining table. "Living room…Now!" He demands
Maya stands and walks almost childlike to the living room and takes a seat. "What the hell is wrong with you? You're need to control our daughter is getting way out of hand. What do you have to say for yourself?"
"She's moving too fast Eli. Can't you see that? She barely knows him?"
"You barely knew me and look at us now." He pauses "I will not have you discouraging our daughter. She's a very smart young lady and can make her own choices. She doesn't need you making them for her. You can't possibly know what's best for her love…she is not you Maya and unless you want to lose her you will mind your business and just be there for her. I will not allow you to continue to make our daughter feel bad about her life choices. This I will promise you Maya if you continue down this path I will choose my daughter and you will be left alone to fend for yourself financially and otherwise."
With a huff Maya spill out "You wouldn't"
"Try me." Eli state with a sneer "Olivia has done everything to please you all of her life and now she's stepping into her own person and you will respect that and allow her to do so. Are we clear?" "But Eli dear he's doesn't come from where we come from he…." Eli cuts her off "You mean the hood? Cause that where we come from. The freaking hood lower class, the poorest of the poor or did you forget? It seems to me you have a problem with his race just admit it and you're making excuses. I will say this you need to get over it because she loves him and there's nothing you can do when a woman is in love you should know this."
"Oh dear you're right…I do have a problem with his race. I just wanted her to fall in love and marry a prominent successful black man am I wrong for that?"
"You can't help who you fall in love with dear but we as her parents needs to except and respect our daughter's choices even if we may not agree with them."
"You're right dear I will try to do better. I don't want to lose you or her."
"Good now let's go to bed I have a surprise for you in the bedroom." Maya smiles and follows her husband hoping for the surprise he loves to share with his mouth.
…
The following morning Fitz and Liv prepare to go to the doctor's appointment when Liv notices Harrison has already left so she and Fitz heads to his house before going to the appointment so Fitz could change clothes. Once at the appointment Liv's name is called and they both follow the nurse to the back when the doctor's enters the room. "Hello Ms. Pope and Mr.…?" Fitz quickly stands and finishes the sentence "Grant, Fitz Grant." "Mr. Grant I'm Dr. Elizabeth North I see you both are here to confirm a pregnancy?"
Liv looks at Fitz and smiles "Well I was confirmed at another clinic, I wasn't sure if I was going to go through with the pregnancy."
"Okay I understand, so what I want to do is take some blood to determine for myself and check your HCG levels and then we will do an ultrasound so you can possibly hear the heartbeat. How does that sound?"
"That sounds good." Liv states as Fitz adds "Great." Both smiling like two Chinese cats
The blood work is taken and 45 minutes or so the doctor returns with a look of concern on her face. She takes a seat and clears her throat. "Umhm I have your results but I must say I have some concerns about you HCG levels. They are very high and that concerns me. You say you might be about 8 weeks?" Liv nods as Fitz look on "Well the normal range for 8 weeks of pregnancy is 7,650-230,000 MIU/ml yours are currently reading at 5000,000 and this concerns me because when your number are way too high. I'm concerned with a possible molar pregnancy." Liv and Fitz gasp as Fitz takes Liv's hand into his. "But I need to do and ultrasound to confirm which type you may be experiencing a whole molar pregnancy or a half molar pregnancy. The ultrasound will tell me this. I'm sorry to have to tell you guys this, but I'm a straight shooter and I like to just cut to the chase with my patients. I apologize ahead of time for having to share this news."
"What's a molar pregnancy?" Fitz asks feeling Liv anxiety kicking in
"It's an abnormal pregnancy that occurs when a non-viable fertilized egg implants into the uterus in the form of cells and fails to come to term. There are two types of molar pregnancies as I stated before but neither will produce a full pregnancy. It causes your HCG levels to rise a great deal which is an indicator for this type of pregnancy. I will need to do a vaginal ultrasound as well for the best diagnosis. If this is the case I will have to perform a D&C to remove the cells.
"So I will miscarry?" Liv asks with trembling lips
"Well if you are experiencing a half molar pregnancy yes, but if you're experiencing a whole molar pregnancy there is no fetus so no. Either way the pregnancy will not make it to term. I'm very sorry."
Fitz drops his head and Liv sits in shock. "Are you sure?" Liv asks "Yes Ms. Pope your HCG levels are a clear indication of this." "O…okay umm what do you need from me?"
"Let's start with the ultrasound." Dr. North expresses while standing motioning for Liv to lie on the exam table with Fitz by her side holding her hand the entire time Liv didn't feel as much fear as she did when she was alone in the last exam room.
The ultrasound is performed and just as Dr. North suspected there was not embryo just a bunch of cells attached to the uterine wall. No sign of a fetus or pregnancy. Olivia was experiencing a whole molar pregnancy with just the placenta attached to some cells. Dr. North performed the D&C and removed the cells being that it was an out-patient procedure and Dr. North's office was located inside of the hospital. Liv was told to follow-up in six weeks. She was also given birth control of her choice which was the pill. Since there was no baby Liv and Fitz was able to handle their disappointment a bit better than had they actually lost their baby.
Fitz takes Liv back to his place and shares with his dad today events. Gerry is so disappointed so he grabs Liv and hugs her causing her to cry. So he pulls Fitz in and the three cry together.
Over the next two weeks Fitz pampered spoiled and catered to Liv's every need or want or desire. He was not sure if the pregnancy bothered her or not after that day. She didn't mention it or talk about it. She just continued on as if it never happened. She also was not in the mood for any intimacy outside of kissing and cuddling. Getting married also became and undiscussed issue after telling Fitz she agreed with his decision to wait and just enjoy being engaged for a while.
She told her parents she was going to push the wedding date to sometime next year but wasn't sure of a date as of yet. Maya was filled with joy but Eli was concerned. He knew something had happened to make his daughter move the wedding date but he needed to wait until she was ready to talk about it.
Fitz decided to go with the Langston and Langston group after Liv looked over his paperwork and agreed with their decision for his investment to open another business in Chicago. Edison made partner with the group and Fitz became his client. Today was the meeting to sign off on the final paperwork and Fitz was scheduled to meet with Edison later today. After the meeting Fitz found Edison to be an okay guy. Edison apologized again about his initial encounter with Liv. He respected Fitz and Liv because they both could have pulled Fitz account and easily when with Liv's group but they didn't and that meant a lot to Edison. He also shared with Fitz his displeasure in what happened with Angela but admitted he still had feelings for her. Fitz shared his thoughts as well telling Edison that what was done was done and if he really cared about Angela he should do maybe give her a call. Edison took him up on his advice but Angela was in the wind.
No one had heard from her since they last saw her at the ball. When Fitz got home later that day he shared with Liv what he and Edison discussed so Liv tried to reach out to Angela herself but was unsuccessful in her efforts as well.
Over the next two months Liv had officially moved in with Fitz and Harrison had move into Liv's home. Gerry also stayed in LA and found a modest home not too far from Fitz and Liv. Lisa finally set a wedding date for August and Abby got engaged. Kim came out and publicly dated. Everyone seemed to be moving forward in their relationships and their lives. So it seemed. Still no one had heard from Angela. Liv was starting to feel bad for the way she treated her. She was a bit hard on her about the whole girl code seeing she and Edison never dated. So she talked with the other ladies and they all decided to get over the whole ordeal and check on their friend.
They all got together after several unanswered phone calls and went to her home only to find that it was up for sale and no one resided there. They then called her job to see if she was available only to find that she no longer worked there. This was not like Angela and now they were all worried. So they contacted her parents only to find out that she has a new man she lives with but since meeting him she doesn't come around much and her parent's didn't know where they lived, but they also expressed how they didn't like the guy she was dating because he gave them bad vibes and when they expressed their concerns she distanced herself from them.
Later that night as Liv prepared dinner she shared her concerns about Angela with Fitz. "Fitz I'm worried this is not like Angela to just go off with some guy."
"Yeah well she's and adult Liv." Liv quickly turns to Fitz "I know that Fitz what I'm saying is she would never quit her job and not talk to her parents just like that without talking to someone."
"Well speaking of talking to someone when are you going to talk about us getting married as well as our non-existent sex life?" Liv stiffens "We have sex."
Fitz becomes frustrated running his hand over his face "Really Liv? That's all you have to say?" Liv stirs the sauce she's making "Fitz I told you I don't want to end up pregnant again."
"And I told you we could use condoms until you felt more comfortable."
"But what if one breaks or leaks?"
"Okay I get that I can pull out Liv but what about setting a wedding date? What's your excuse for that. When I wanted to wait you said no then you came to me and said we should wait after the pregnancy thing. Do you not want to marry me now? Do you not love me anymore?" Fitz voice drops sadly with the question causing Liv to stop what she's doing and turn to him. "Babe…no I love you. I will always love you. I just…just I'm scared Fitz." "Of marrying me?" "No babe…of disappointing my mother. We've been getting along so well since we decided to wait…" Fitz interrupts "You mean since you decided to wait?" Liv turns and walks away and begins stirring the sauce again "I thought you understood when I told you I wanted to wait?"
"That still doesn't negate the fact that you decided to wait not me. I'm just making sure we are clear on that." In that moment Liv's cell phone rings and she walks over to the counter to retrieve it. "Hey Har can I call you back?"
Harrison's voice comes through the phone "Liv can you come to the house?"
"Har I'm in the middle of something can this wait?"
"No Liv get your ass over here now and bring Fitz with you." Harrison hangs up and the line goes dead. Liv looks at her cell phone in disbelief "We need to go to the house." "Why did something happen?" Liv turns off the stove "I don't know but my brother just cussed at me and told me to get there and to bring you." Fitz jumps up from his seated position "Let's go."
A/N: I couldn't help myself I had to leave you guys wanting more. So cliffhanger it is. What do you think happened? And what do you think about the chapter. What going on with Liv? What going on with Angela? What do you guys think about Fitz staying with Langston and Langston? I know these questions are all mixed up but I'm going off memory. What about Eli and Maya's discussion? Leave your thoughts, Just know I'm still writing as we speak…..Until next time….Keke
