Hello, it's been a while hasn't it?!

I can't believe I started this two years ago, and I haven't even had the politeness to finish it!

I'm at a bit of a crossroads with this story, one path has more melodrama, the other is more straightforward, albeit shorter. Please let me know if you guys want more angst, or you just want some kind of conclusion, finally..

Hope you are all staying safe and well. xx

Chapter 14 – "The moon was shining sulkily, because she thought the sun had got no business to be there"

Whorls of smoke billowed from her mouth, coiling into each other and settling in the air like mist over a field. In one hand Joyce held a tumbler of liquid that she had long given up trying to identify. It had been dug out the back of Karen's drinks cabinet and handled with great care. The ice clinked softly against the glass as she resettled herself on the sofa, legs drawn up defensively beneath her.

Karen was sitting opposite, leaning forward, forearms resting on knees. An observer would presume that they had interrupted an interrogation, the way Karen hung onto every expression of the woman in front of her, looking for signs of weakness.

Karen too was smoking, but the act looked ill at ease on her, her fingers unused to the presence of a cigarette, and she would occasionally cough delicately at the strength of the tobacco.

"So, tell me again." Karen asked after another drag of her cigarette. Her eyes were creased up in effort of keeping the smoke out of her eyes. She waved her hand backwards and forwards to clear the haze in front of her.

Joyce had told Karen three times about her argument with Hopper, it felt good to get it off of her chest and speak to another adult who might understand her predicament.

"I still can't remember what happened in his truck though. I must have said something that upset him." Joyce huffed out a breath, frustrated at her lack of memory.

"I honestly don't know why he would say things like that though. I thought he would understand."

"Joyce honey, I can't believe you've been so blind", Karen said somewhat exasperated.

"You've been twisting yourself up in knots for no reason. You know he was jealous don't you?"

Joyce's eyebrows drew together and furrowed; "What, of that ...guy?"

"I think Hopper would be jealous of Charles Manson, if he showed any interest in you Joyce", Karen replied.

"Besides, I don't think it was that guy at the bar that necessarily set him off. I think it was you and Bob."

Karen sipped on her drink before elaborating on her theory; "I'm guessing that he realized a while ago that he wanted more, probably around the same time that you started seeing Bob, and when Bob died, he hoped something might develop."

Joyce didn't reply, staring at the end of her cigarette.

"But that's all hypothetical," Karen continued; "What is actual fact." Karen stabbed her cigarette in emphasis; "Is that he couldn't stop staring at you in that bar. He's probably been waiting to ask you out, when you start flirting with some random teenager."

Karen shrugged her shoulders; "The Chief got jealous, It's not ideal, but it's a-typical Hopper behavior."

There was no reply. Joyce was staring off into space 'Was it really as simple as that?

"So what do you want? Neither of you are acting like a quick fuck is the aim here."

"Karen!", Joyce said in shock, her mouth dropping open.

"Answer the question Joyce!"

"I want him...", she started

"I want him..."

"Uh-huh, we established that by your behaviour earlier.", Karen said smugly.

Joyce's mind was working at a rate of knots, what did she want? She had certainly outgrown any expectation of romantic declarations of love, or fairytale endings, but part of her still longed for that family unit, stable and whole, despite it evading her for so long. Where did Hopper fit in with that longing?

"What would you do if he wasn't around Joyce?", Karen's voice interjected softly. "What if he met someone and moved away again?"

In answer, panic clawed its way up her throat and threatened to choke her.

"You need to tell him how you feel." Karen said kindly, reading the expression on her friend's face.

"Where would I start?", said Joyce, filled with the enormity of finishing a conversation that had been started when they were reckless teenagers.

Hopper was surprised when Joyce furtively shuffled into his office the day after he had seen her at Melvalds.

"Hey,", he said smiling at her.

Joyce bizarrely looked startled to see him, squeaking out a noise by way of greeting.

"You ok?', he asked; "You seem kinda hyped up?"

"Me? No, I'm fine!", She replied breathlessly.

"You wanna sit down then?"

Joyce flopped herself in the nearest chair, smiling at everything apart from him.

Something was up, but Hopper was just happy to be in the same room as her after so long. So, he said nothing and leant back in his chair, interlacing his fingers behind his head.

Joyce's hands twisted round in her lap, as the voice at the back of her brain made salacious comments about Hoppers new physique. She was finding it extremely difficult to formulate what she wanted to say, despite rehearsing it several times with Karen. She had never asked someone out on a date before, and she was so nervous that she resorted to jamming her hands under her thighs in order to control them. Joyce had wanted so desperately to look confident, instead she felt like she had been sent to the principle's office.

The silence was drawing on into ridiculousness, and she knew she had to say something. Anything.

"Howdy"

The silence drew on again, as Joyce grew extremely red in the face. Howdy. She had said Howdy to the man she wanted to ask out on a date. She desperately wished she had some more of that mysterious alcohol that Karen kept hidden in her drink's cabinet.

"Well Howdy back at ya", he chuckled. She was adorable when she was nervous.

Joyce pushed back the hair from her face, took a deep breath and started rambling;

"Look, it was good to see you the other day. I'm sorry that Karen called you to collect us that night. I don't remember a lot, so if I said something that was out of line, I'm sorry. But you were out of line too, what you said really hurt me and I missed you. Then you give me the silent treatment for what felt like forever." Joyce was now pacing backwards and forwards in front of his desk.

"And, I know you're sorry. I could tell as you soon as you came in to the store, but what I wanted to say was that I missed you. A lot. And I've been doing some thinking and I wanted to ask you whether"

She came to a stop and stood in front of him, like a wild bird ready to take flight if she was mistreated.

"Whether you wanted to get some dinner some time. With me?"

Flo's voice came through the intercom, hemming awkwardly.

"Uh, Chief. Carol is here to see you."

Hopper's eyes widened in shock, he looked very much like he had been caught sneaking food out of his mother's pantry.

Before his finger could reach out and press the intercom, a woman burst through the door of his office.

'Hi Hop," the woman said breathlessly at the mute man behind the desk before turning towards Joyce.

"Oh my goodness, I didn't realise you had an appointment!"

"No, uh. It's ok, Joyce this is Carol. Carol, Joyce." He finished lamely.

Carol reached out a hand with a smile like the Cheshire Cat, revealing perfect pearly whites.

"Joyce Byers? Jim has told me so much about you, I'm so pleased to meet you finally!"

Joyce started to experience a horrible sinking feeling in her body, she shook the woman's hand limply as she looked back at Hopper. Hopper however seemed to be staring at his intercom like it had betrayed him.

"Nice to meet you." Joyce eventually chewed out.

Oblivious to the atmosphere in the room, Carol smiled even more brilliantly, threatening to smash the lightbulbs with its luminosity. She sat herself in the chair opposite Joyce, folding her impossibly long legs around each other. Joyce noted with mortification that everything about Carol appeared perfect, from her manicured fingernails to the immaculate curls of her hair. Even her clothes were flawless, tasteful and tight-fitting in all the right places. The voice in the back of Joyce's head started whining like a petulant child whose toy was about to be taken away from her.

"Well," Carol said shyly, looking at Hopper; "Can I tell Joyce?"

Hopper shrugged weakly, as Joyce's eyes burned into his.

"Me and Jim have been out on a couple of dates", Carol said with evident bashful pride.

Joyce suddenly couldn't swallow, which was just as well as she didn't trust her mouth not to swear profusely. After a couple of seconds of silence, she choked out;

"That's great!" It sounded hollow in her ears.

"Thanks. Anyway, I need to get back to work," Hopper said in a sudden rush to escape both of them. "You were saying something Joyce?"

"Doesn't matter, I can't remember. Do you still want me to have Eleven tonight?" Suddenly realizing in horror the motives behind her babysitting duty. The tears started to burn behind her eyes, threatening to give the game away.

"If it's ok?" Hopper asked.

"Of course!" She flew out of the door, entirely missing the goodbyes of Carol and the sympathetic expression on Flo's face.