Kaidan's eyes slit open. The fish tank rippled light around the room. It outlined a shadow. A shadow leaning over him.

"What's happening?" Kaidan's eyes flashed open.

Shepard froze. Her hands hovered over his face. "Oh, uh. Hey there."

"What are you doing?"

"I was just – Oh, nothing." Shepard drew back.

Kaidan narrowed his eyes. Her grin had a curling, pressed-lipped quality that reminded him of the cartoon grinch. She flicked on her Omni-Tool, and he knew his suspicion was right. He put a hand up and blocked the camera flash.

"What the hell?" He sat up. Then he felt it. "What's in my hair?"

He lifted his hand, but Shepard caught his elbow. "Just go slow."

"What?" Kaidan hissed. She didn't answer, just released his arm and took a step back. Kaidan held her gaze and raised a hand slowly into his hair. Fur. Something moved. "What? No. Is that your hamster?"

"Go slow. Don't scare him."

"Get him out. I think he's burrowing in."

"Into your scalp? Oh, come on."

"Into my hair. Nesting."

Shepard sat on the edge of the bed and smiled. "What? You don't want to go on duty with a hamster on your head?"

"I don't want a hamster on my head when I'm off duty."

"Afraid it'll affect your image?"

"If it didn't, I should be more worried about my image." He felt down into his hair, but Shepard caught his arm again. "Shepard, really? I can feel him setting up camp."

"Oh, fine." Shepard moved Kaidan hair aside and plucked out a wiggling ball of fur. "I didn't see a wheel up there. Couldn't have set up camp that permanently."

Kaidan rubbed the top of his head. "Was that staged? This some sort of relationship hazing?"

"I didn't put him up to it. Chose it himself. I was letting him scamper around while I read the news on my datapad."

Shepard dropped the hamster back into the cage.

"Don't forget to snap the lid," Kaidan said. "You keep forgetting."

"Hey, he's not exactly athletic if you've noticed the lack of wheel squeaking. Climb a glass wall? I don't think so. Still …" She snapped the cage closed. "There. You and your lovely locks are safe from the machinations of a pot-bellied hamster."

"Thanks, I guess."

"We're marines. We stick together." Shepard flew down the stairs and pounced into bed. "Nothing like starting the day with a hamster on your head."

"I prefer coffee. It did wake me up though."

"See."

Kaidan sunk back into the sheets. "You realize I'll be paranoid now, checking my hair every time I wake up."

"I was hoping you wouldn't notice until after your shower. Cage's getting a little ripe. Little fellow could use a good shampoo."

"Ah." Kaidan folded the pillow under his head. "You know, maybe one morning you'll wake up with a hamster in your hair."

"Can't force a nesting site. Has to be his idea."

"I'll sprinkle sunflower seeds as a welcome mat."

"Seeds in my hair? Sounds worse than a warm, furry little hamster." Shepard pulled over her own pillow. "You told me to wake you up."

Kaidan smiled. "Should have been more specific. Guess I had it coming."

"Precisely." She traced her fingers along his jaw. "Good morning."

"Yeah. It is." He brushed her smile with his lips.

She twisted her fingers into his hair and kissed him harder. "I'm glad you're here, Kaidan."

"Wouldn't be anywhere else. Even if I have to comb hamster out of my hair."

Shepard chuckled and crawled over him. "So, how awake are you?"

"Whichever's the right answer, I'm it." He laughed, pulled her down by the neck, and kissed her mouth.

XXX

Kaidan threw the shuttle door open to the cargo bay. They tumbled out flushed and laughing. Kaidan broke mid-laugh and stopped dead in his tracks. Cortez glared at them with crossed arms and a sour expression.

"Lieutenant Cortez." Kaidan gave a strained smile. "How long have you …"

"Long enough."

"Long enough for what?" Shepard said unperturbed. "I thought you were at Vega's poker thing."

"Hey, Lola."

Kaidan craned his neck to see around Cortez. James stood at his workbench polishing armor with a rag and an alarmingly wide grin.

"Get this," James said, "Buggie, who I didn't invite but came anyway, guess what he did? Apparently – don't know how I never knew – but aces are low cards. That's what I'm being told anyway. Everyone agrees with me, he throws the table over. Chip hits Doctor Blue right between the eyes. And she was only there to watch him."

"So, he says aces are low, huh?" Shepard said.

"Says in his cycle, ace is low. Since his cycle came first … I'm like, 'Whoa, whoa, hold on. Ace has always been high. Right, Doc?' But she's vamoosed. Then it's just he said, he said, you know? Just called it a night. Don't know why I never thought of inviting him."

Shepard chuckled and tugged the zipper up higher on her hoodie. "You know Javik's messing with you, right? Don't need Liara to know the Protheans never had poker."

"How should I know? Hard to argue with a Prothean about Protheans."

Kaidan edged toward the elevator, but he couldn't catch Shepard's eyes. Cortez was still giving them a dark look. James dumped the armor on the bench and came over.

"So, Lola and L2 in the shuttle." James whistled through his smile. "Guess we shoulda picked the card table back up, huh, Esteban? Kept playing. This is gonna stick with you a long time." James patted Cortez's back.

Shepard sighed and put a hand on her hip. "Uh huh. What's all this whistling and winking going on, Vega? Everything's very aboveboard here."

"Sure, ha. Whatever you say," James said.

Cortez face scrunched. "Respectfully, I'd sooner believe Protheans play poker."

"Eh. Fine. Believe whatever you want." Shepard shrugged. She tugged on Kaidan's arm. "We should go."

James laughed and his grin deepened. "Ha, Lola. Look at L2's face. Knew I was right! That's what I'm believing."

"What?" Shepard spun to Kaidan. "Hey, don't look so shifty there, Kaidan. You're giving James an ego and Cortez an aneurysm."

Kaidan tried to smooth whatever it was playing in his expression.

"So," James said wolfishly, "what sort of aboveboard thing were you two doing in there?"

"Well," Shepard said. She adjusted her hoodie and put her hands on her hips. "My hamster got free. We were looking for him."

"In the shuttle?" James cocked his head with a serious expression. "Huh, weird. How'd he get all the way down here? Long ways from your cabin, right?"

Shepard shifted on her feet and threw Kaidan a sideways look. She focused back on James.

"Funny story," she said. "Forgot to close the cage. Damn critter's more athletic than I gave him credit for. Escaped. He likes to run around the ship. Making my rounds, I saw his cheeky, little hind end crawling into the shuttle."

"And L2?" James waved at him. "Where's he come in?"

"Hamster crawled under the floor panels. Needed someone dexterous in biotics to, you know, pluck the hamster out."

"Why close the door?" Cortez asked with a hardened stare.

"Couldn't let the hamster escape. Obviously," Shepard said.

"That the right story, Major?" James smirked.

Kaidan cleared his throat. "Yep. That's about it."

"Uh huh. Sure, sure." James shared a look with Cortez. "Oh, yeah. Just one thing. Where's that hamster now? You shut the door so he couldn't escapar, right? L2 not as, uh, dexterous as you thought?"

Kaidan frowned. "Not appreciating the air quotes on that, Vega."

"Major Alenko is plenty dexterous."

"Not appreciating the air quotes from you either, Shepard."

"What? Don't worry." Shepard laughed and elbowed him. "You did a good job."

Cortez buried his face in his hands. "Oh. My shuttle."

"Why're you crying, Cortez?" Shepard said. "He was out before he could make a mess."

"Still talking about the hamster, right?" James leaned a palm on the shuttle. His molars showed his smile was so wide. His eyes shifted to Kaidan. "Ow, Man. Hamster-diving's got some mean restrictions."

"My shuttle," Cortez moaned. "Do I need to clean it?"

"Not much." Shepard shrugged. "Did kind of get exciting at the end though. May have missed some things. There was a lot of writhing and screaming in Kaidan's hands. Kaidan's dexterity in finest form."

James's palm slipped. He stumbled against the shuttle. Cortez only moaned louder.

"Shepard!" Kaidan hissed.

"What?" Shepard lifted her shoulders. "Deny any of that's true."

Kaidan stared at her a long moment. He reached for her sweatshirt. "Just give me … Hey! Don't fight me on this." She slapped him away and stumbled out of his grab.

"What's happening?" James's eyes widened. "Yo, L2, you trying to get her clothes off? Lola's got a private room. You know that, right?"

Kaidan snared her hood. She shoved him away with both hands.

"Shepard, just show—"

"Don't show anythin'." James put his hands up. "Difference between real and joking around."

"My shuttle," Cortez said mournfully.

"Shepard!" Kaidan lunged at her. She slipped under his reach, but he hooked her hood. His hand closed around a furry ball nestled inside. It squirmed in his fist with a shrill squeal.

"What the …" James's eyes bulged. "You really—That the—Damn. There really was a … Whoa. Did not see that coming."

Kaidan waved the beady-eyed fur in front of James's face. He thrust it into Cortez's face next.

"Then …" Cortez's face brightened. Kaidan's towed him to the shuttle and flicked on his Omni-Tool light. It illuminated the inside of the shuttle. Panels gaped open in the floor with the covers stacked in the corner.

"Sorry about the panels," Shepard said in a deflated tone. She crossed her arms with a huff and gave Kaidan a sideways frown. "We could have taken this much further."

"I didn't want it taken anywhere." Kaidan pet the fuzzy head with the pad of his thumb. "Keep leaving the cage cover off, he'll be on your next ground mission."

Shepard shoved Kaidan lightly and flashed him a smile. "Come on. I know you'll still help me find him again, despite me giving 'dexterous' air quotes."

"So you really …" James's mouth hung open. "Looking for a hamster. Damn, kind of feel disappointed in you two now. Horrified to bored. That fast."

"Thank all species' gods and spirits," Cortez mumbled and crawled into his shuttle. "It was only a hamster. Only a hamster."

"Come on, Alenko. Let's put him back behind bars." Shepard tugged his arm and tilted her head toward the elevator.

Kaidan followed her inside. She turned her hood to him, and he plopped the wiggling fur back inside. The elevator doors slid shut.

"See," Shepard turned to him, "got away with the hamster-rescue celebration after all."

"Yeah, but then I had to catch him a second time," Kaidan said. He grinned despite the heat stinging his face. "I'm not following you alone into a shuttle again."

"Hey. I can't help if hamster-hunting heats my blood. Your ass was in the air rooting around in the floor. I had to start undressing. Couldn't orphan my hamster dying from hyperthermia."

Kaidan rolled his eyes and laughed.

"So," Shepard sidled up next to him. "You did save him a second time. Second hamster-rescue celebration?"

The elevator door opened to the landing. Kaidan pressed her against the cabin door.

"You look hyperthermic." He zipped her hoodie down, fingers grazing her skin. With his other hand, he reached for the hood in back.

"Hey!" Shepard said. "You're worried about putting the hamster away, aren't you?"

Kaidan laughed. "I draw the line at three times in one day."

"Really?" Shepard adjusted his collar. "That's too bad."

"Three hamster rescues. Three hamster rescue celebrations, different."

The cabin door opened at her back, and he peeled off her hoodie as she stepped into her room.

Shepard patted the lump in her hood. "Back to the block, Little Guy. Then just crank the TV the up and plug your igloo door with plenty of woodchips."

Shepard sprang down her steps and dove on the bed. She rolled onto her back.

"Hey, Kaidan. Don't forget to snap the cage shut. You forget every damn time."

He gave her a flat look through the glass case. Shepard only grinned.