Kaidan slinked into the med bay. The dim light of night cycle from the mess hall window casted the room in shadows. It was silent, except for the air handler and hum of FTL. A bundle shifted on the steel bed in the back, a mound of blankets with a tuff of hair and shinning eyes. Open eyes. Kaidan stopped in place.

"Sorry. Did I wake you?"

Shepard gave a pale smile and nestled her chin into the blanket. "I'm only fourteen hours into my beauty sleep."

"If that's all sleep is good for, you shouldn't bother." He shuffled closer.

"Hm. I'll remember that next time you're complaining I come to bed."

Kaidan grinned. "That's not all a bed's for."

His shadow fell over her face. Medical cords trailed out of the blanket to a heart rate monitor and an internal temperature gauge. The outside of the electric blanket almost seared Kaidan's palm. He pulled his hand back sharply. If it was that hot on the outside, how hot was it inside?

"You know," Shepard said through blue lips. "They always say the best way to bring your core body temperature up …"

Kaidan touched Shepard's cheek with the back of his fingers. Clammy. The skin around her eyes was sunken and dark. Her cheeks were bloodless. Whatever happened with the Leviathan wasn't wearing off fast.

"I'm sure Dr. Chakwas thought of all the options." Kaidan smiled down at her.

"I don't know what they teach in med school, but all the vids clearly say you should be under the blanket with me. Naked."

"All right. Move over." Kaidan grabbed the top button on his collar. He paused.

"Keep going." Shepard whistled. She craned her neck and looked around the room. "Over there. There's an IV pole. Wheel it over. Then keep going."

Kaidan laughed. "Pole dancing when the pole has wheels? Guess I'm in the right place for the most likely outcome."

"You still haven't gotten that button? Lean down." Shepard squirmed against the tight constraints of the blanket. Her arm popped free. It was sheathed in an insulated sleeve sealed all the way to her fingertips. It looked like a flipper. Kaidan laughed so loud, he had to cover his mouth.

"Hey." Shepard waved her fin. "I didn't come up with this get-up."

"What are you wearing under there?" Kaidan peeled back a sliver of the blanket. Shepard bopped his hand away with her mit.

"Don't worry about that," she said and pulled out her other arm, also sheathed. Kaidan laughed harder.

"Hey! Just bring your collar closer."

"I can't see you unbuttoning anything with those flippers."

"I don't intend to. I'll use them to hold your face while I tear the buttons off with my teeth."

"Sounds like a choking hazard." Kaidan undid the first button. "There. I got it started for you." He leaned his neck down to her face.

Shepard's lips curled in a deviled grin. "Should we play chicken? You undo a button, I undo a button. You think I'm not serious, but let's see who stops first."

Kaidan chuckled imagining it. "That'd give Dr. Chakwas a morning jolt, wouldn't it? Me, under the blankets lost in the sweet embrace of your flippers, my clothes gnawed off and scattered around the room."

"Sounds hilarious to me. Let's do it." Shepard wrapped his neck with her paddles and kissed his mouth.

"It feels like a starfish has me," Kaidan mumbled and kissed her back.

Her mouth was cold, her tongue soft but cool. There was a quiver in her jaw, and it wasn't from passion. At least, he was pretty sure.

He pulled back and framed her face with his hands. "Hell, Shepard. You're still cold. It's been fifteen hours."

"Get under here then."

"No, seriously. You all right? You scared me down there."

"Already got that message loud and clear."

"It doesn't change anything, though, does it?"

Shepard gave a slight smile and squeezed his neck with her mits before letting go. Kaidan dragged a chair from the desk. He folded an arm on the edge of the bed and rested his chin so they were face to face.

"You scare me, too, you know? Just the way it is." Shepard worked her arms back under the blanket.

"Yeah? And you're pissed as hell every time I do. Where's the 'just the way it is' shrug then?"

Shepard scrunched closer to his face until their noses nearly brushed. "Don't take a bullet for me, Kaidan. Ever."

"Don't take a bullet for me. Ever. Let me do some of this stuff. It doesn't always need to be you who falls on the grenade."

Shepard studied his eyes. "Virmire, Alchera, Mars … Sometimes I wonder if there's another name on the list. I just don't know it yet."

Kaidan brushed the hair back from her forehead and rested a palm on her cool cheek. "I actually did lose you. Not an almost."

"You're saying it's your turn then? Not on my watch."

Kaidan forced a weak smile. "You're not leaving me behind next time."

Shepard frowned. "There was only one seat in the deep sea diver."

"Not that. Or not exactly." He settled his cheek against his arm. "I'm not going to be left behind again. Left here."

Her frown sharpened. She gazed back at him with steady eyes but didn't say a word.

"I love you," Kaidan whispered. "I wish we had more time together."

"Kaidan, no. Don't say that."

Kaidan caressed a thumb along her cheekbone with a sigh and forced a smile. "All right."

"All right," Shepard repeated in a firmer, almost chipper tone, and a little too loudly. "You can't have your face this close to mine and not kiss me. Scoot closer. If I can't have you in the sweet embrace of my flippers, then at least let me kiss-"

Kaidan crushed his mouth to her lips. A part of him wanted to remember all of this - how she tasted, her voice, the feel of her skin, every word she said - but the other part of him said not to bother. He didn't need to remember anything. He would be beside her this time, not spinning away in an escape pod. If she left this life, then this time, it wouldn't be alone in the dark emptiness of space. He wasn't going to be left behind.