I think you guys will like this one. You'll learn more about Ana's family business and a little present for you guys at the end of the chapter.
I'm glad a lot of you liked the last chapter, we are on our way to these two getting back together. I PINKY PROMISE. Next chapter will be a heart to heart between Elliot and Ana. I've always adored Elliot's character in general.
TLynnson: You read my mind! I actually have something up my sleeve like that in the coming chapters. thank you so much for leaving a review and sharing your thoughts!
Luvdisney2007: I wanted to say THANK YOU for being dedicated. I know how crazy this time is and you're doing us all such a huge favor. Stay safe love. To all the people out there who are showing up for work and are essential employees in their industries. Thank you, THANK YOU for your service. We do not deserve you. I'm glad you liked the little humor in girl talk between Kate and Ana. I really enjoyed writing it, haha. Along with showing a mirror to Christian in regards to his businessman demeanor. He played with fire and da bish got burnttttt haha.
This is short chapter but it has goodies in it.
Chapter 25 - I was so foolish, I was so blind.
Monday, January 27th, 2020
After my nightmare early this morning, I lay in bed and set my playlist to shuffle as I thought about everything Grace told me about Christian when she came by for a surprise visit yesterday afternoon before her shift at Seattle-Mason. Christian and Mia had told her about Nana's passing and she wanted to check in on me and brought me some home cooked food. It was the best thing to have in this time of confusion and loneliness.
"When I saw him across the room... his eyes were magnetic. I saw a world of hurt in them but I just knew I was meant to be his mother. I wanted to take him away from all the pain and give him all the love I could. I went home to Cary that night, woke up him up and said that I found my son."
"He was so self-sufficient. It was almost heartbreaking. He wouldn't let me touch him and still doesn't. He would bathe himself. He'd eat to his hearts content but there was still fear in his eyes. I'd find food stashed away under his bed or hidden in the drawers. He was just so afraid. He'd wake up at night crying and screaming. He had horrible night terrors, screaming for his mother, screaming for the abuse to stop. It was... my baby boy went through so much."
"Elliot of course wasn't all that happy to have another sibling. He's my clown but he eventually got over it and they got a long but Christian never spoke. Not until Mia. I brought her home and Christian never left her side. He looked at her with wonder and when I introduced him to her, I said 'Christian, this is your baby sister. Her name is Mia."... he said her name. His first word was Mia and Ana, it was like there was light in his eyes. I looked at Cary and cried. My baby boy had found his voice."
"The second time I felt like I saw the light in his eyes, the light that was always meant to be there and burn bright was when he was with you. They way he worried for you at the resort and the way he looked at you the entire time. It was magic."
"That bitch took a lot away from him. I'd be lucky if I'd get to speak to Christian once a week but since you Ana, I get to speak to him 2-3 times a week and we've met for lunch twice. Even if it's small conversations, he talks. We still have a long way to go but he's coming back to us. You did that Ana."
I say a prayer to try and calm myself. I can go back to him. I can trust him. I have to believe that I can trust him. I have to believe that he won't hurt me like that. He's been patient and gentle with me, that person really does exist. I need to have faith in him. I need to find the strength in me to have more faith than fear.
For the infinite time in the last few weeks, I wake up late. Thank god, I always set out my clothes the night before to save me some time. While I always do get to work on time, the anxiety filled morning tends to hang over me like a cloud for the rest of the day. I can't seem to sleep. I haven't slept well since my last night with Christian. How is it that someone who I haven't known for very long can have such a hold on me. I have confusing dreams and I wake up crying. Nani told me to not measure my relationship in time but in trust. I trusted him with everything and I ran away in fear. One aspect of his life came to light and it scared me to my core. A part of my brain is screaming at me to leave before I get left because I've never been enough.
I blast some music. I need to get out of this mindset. I take a quick and cold shower to help me wake up and do a quick low messy bun. I have puffy eyes and dark circles. When I feel like shit I tend to overdo my make up. I read somewhere that lipstick gives you endorphins. Well, this morning at Steele, Inc... we're going for a shit ton of concealer, eyeliner a shit ton of mascara and a red lip. Hopefully that will distract everyone from my miserable looking face. I throw on a dark green, structured crepe dress and black heels. Yes, this façade will get me through the day because it has to.
Sound of the times
Sound of your crimes
Thinkin' about the other night
Was it all in my mind?
I was so foolish, I was so blind
Why do we do this to each other, baby?
Heartbreak by design
How could you tell me nothing's wrong
(Just tell me, baby)
Tell me, tell me nothing's wrong
(How could you tell me nothing's wrong)
It was good but now it's gone, baby
Tell me, tell me nothing's wrong
(T-tell me nothing's wrong)
How could you tell me nothing's wrong
(Just tell me baby)
Go on, tell me what you want (t-tell me)
Boy, you keep telling me all along (t-tell me)
Just telling me nothing's wrong
CPOV
"The Malaysians are really easy to work with. Wish the Chinese weren't such pricks." Ros groans.
"Hmm."
"Christian, is everything okay? You've been really out of it this morning." Ros asks and I almost detect a sense of worry in her voice.
"Yeah, just a lot on my mind. Personally."
"IS IT A GIRL? I sincerely hope so because you being gay would really make me question my gaydar."
"Ros, for fucks sake."
"Christian, you have been up and down like a girl on her period. I mean you barely spoke a word outside of your usual grunts in this conference call."
"Fuck off, Ros. What's next?"
"We have a meeting with Senator Rhodes at 4pm. We need to leave by 3:30 and then we have that dinner with the Swedes and the Mayor to talk about the wind turbine pilot program. We also need to find time to talk about Rahman Industries, are you up for a working lunch in my office?"
"Yeah, I have lunch free." Thought I wish I didn't. I wish I could be spending quality time with Ana... spending it inside her. Fuck, I need to get a grip. I wonder what she's doing today.
"Mrs. Rahman is finally making an appearance at this next meeting and I get the distinct impression her bastard son is playing both sides. We are going to need our own interpreter in the room just in case to make sure our side is being heard. Does anyone at GEH come from India or maybe knows the language? Let me call HR!" Ros moves to call Caroline from the conference room phone.
"Caroline, Ros here. Do you we have anyone at GEH who is from India or can speak the language? It's kind of urgent."
"Hold on, give me a second... yes we have two people. Anastasia Steele, she can speak Hindi, Urdu and Punjabi and we have Ishaan Kadam, he can speak Marathi, Gujrati and Hindi."
"Okay great. I'll take it from here. Can you email me her file too? Thank Caroline." Ros hangs up and calls Travis.
"Travis did you know Ana spoke Hindi? I'm going to need for the Rahman meeting this week."
"It slipped my mind actually, she doesn't look Indian so I didn't realize to even have her part of this process."
Fuck. I have no idea how this will go. I stayed quiet on purpose; I didn't want to put her in this position, given how she's already doesn't want to see my face. Fuck me, how will this go?
Ros hangs up with Travis and calls Ana's extension.
"Ana!"
"Ros?"
"What are your lunch plans?"
"Um, I was going to work through lunch. Everything okay?"
"I need our input on something GEH related. Working lunch in my office? I'll get sushi. Meet me at 12:30. What do you want to eat?"
"Okay sure. Um... spicy tuna and the fried oyster roll we had a few weeks ago? I also have Gwen's cookies too, by the way. Please don't eat any from the box this time before they get to her."
"I need to block your number from her phone." Ros laughs and Ana giggles. It takes everything in me to not smile as well.
Ros is hell bent on setting up a decent net over the Middle East and Asia, she's got her sights set on modest company based in Delhi, India by the name of Rahman Industries. Their main bread and butter is their investment in the private telecommunication industry while the remainder of their portfolio is divided across textile and hospitality sector in India. Ros wants us in the South Asian market to better position ourselves for Middle East and China to take us seriously. She's been with me for the past 10 years and I owe her this for all the shit I've put her through. She's has never let me down.
We've had two negotiation meetings with the CEO, Mrs. Rahman's son, Akash and their lawyers and we can't seem to agree on a price or terms of the acquisition. Mrs. Rahman, the owner, has yet to make an appearance and apparently doesn't speak English. I have a feeling Akash isn't giving her the full picture of what we're offering in hopes of extracting more money from us. It's fucking frustrating.
I get a buzz from Ros to come into her office for lunch. As I open the doors and walk out of my own, I catch a glimpse of Ana walking out of the elevator looking into her phone and holding a box of cookies, as she turns towards the hallway and walks towards Ros' office. I follow her as quietly as I can. Fuck, she's gives a whole new meaning to 'hate to see you go but love to watch you walk away.' I'm like a horny fucking teenager right now. It's been 38 days since I had sex. Fuck, it feels like it's been 10 years. I'm so pathetic right now.
"Hey Ros... god, I could eat a horse today, I'm starving." Ana giggles as she enters. I stay by the threshold for a bit, out of sight.
"You didn't have breakfast?"
"I had half a yogurt when I came in this morning... I woke up insanely, so yeah. You're saving my life right now." Ana laughs and the admission pisses me off a little. She needs to eat properly.
"Trouble sleeping?"
"Yeah, something like that."
"You know what helps with that?" Ros laughs.
"Shut up, Bailey. I know exactly what you're gonna say because Jose and Val have been driving me nuts with the same. You guys are hell bent on driving me mad with the blind date shit." She giggles feigning annoyance and I take that as my cue to walk in.
"Ladies." I say coolly.
"Hey Christian."
Ana's demeanor changes and she looks to Ros, and I can sense her uneasiness. Fuck me, she looks to die for.
I offer my hand. "Miss Steele, thank you for joining us." She looks at me impassively gives me her strong unaffected handshake and quickly pulls her hand away and continues to help Ros setup the food around the small conference table in her office.
She walks around the table as her heels echo. She is breath taking and looks so incredibly different, grown up and dare I say a little hardened. I quickly take a seat in order to hide the growing bulge in my pants.
We take our seats and she sits across from me but barely looks at me. Her focus remains on Ros.
"So how can I help?" Ana asks. She's completely expressionless as we work to make our plates from the selection of sushi and sashimi in front of us.
"Well, we're trying to acquire a company in India called Rahman Industries and we're having trouble getting through to them. It's a language and cultural barrier and HR told us you speak the language so we need your help." Ros tells her.
"I see." she says simply. "Do you have a file on them?"
"Yes, hold on, it's on my desk." Ros gets up and Ana gives me the death stare for this ambush but she never said anything about this in the session so it's my loophole to spend time with her. I smirk at her and she rolls her eyes, shaking her head. She could very easily murder me right now.
Ros comes back and hands Ana the folder. She stops eating and goes through it but soon looks annoyed at what she sees. "Is this all the info you have on them?" She asks.
"Yes. It tells us exactly what we need to know. Anything else is just noise."
"How have the negotiations been going?"
"Not that good, they want more money and we also suspect that the son isn't giving the mother, who we have yet to meet and has final sign off on anything related to the company, the full picture of what we're offering, so it's been a struggle." Ros tells her.
"How much are you offering them?"
"I don't think you need to concern yourself with that number right now."
"I thought you wanted my help." Ana looks even more annoyed.
"Yes but not with how much to offer them, just to get through to them and explain our side of things by speaking the language."
"Ros, may I speak freely?" She asks.
"Sure, go ahead."
"Unless I have all the facts I cannot even begin to help you with this. There are so many layers to this entire situation that it would make your head spin. I don't operate well in the dark, you want me to help you to the best of my ability then I need all the facts because what you all are operating off of from what I can see in this folder is abysmal. I don't know who put it together but it tells you nothing at all. It's just cold hard facts, Rahman Industries is much more that. You're not acquiring a product, you're acquiring a living, breathing organism that someone essentially gave birth to and put decades of hard work into." She tosses the folder to the side.
"The late Mr. Rahman and his wife built this company from the ground up. Mrs. Rahman comes from Indian occupied Kashmir where all the men in her family were murdered or thrown in jail for activism by the Indian armed forces. She moved to Delhi at the age of 16 and started a small business using all the textile knowledge she inherited from her family. She sold the jewelry that was passed down to her and meant for her wedding and paid for her own education. She met Mr. Rahman along the way who grew up in the slums and somehow made it out of there and ended up going to school followed by college on scholarships to become an engineer. They met, fell in love got married and started Rahman Industries and built that place into what it is brick by brick and became the industry standard of employee care and fair labor practices in India.
Money isn't everything to Mrs. Rahman, she'd sell to you for peanuts as long as it meant that her legacy and workers were to be taken care of. That is her bottom line. They've been in the market to sell for the past 5 years and it's been unsuccessful because no one has convinced Mrs. Rahman that they're worthy of carrying on her legacy, this includes not letting her youngest son lead them into the new decade as well. So yes Ros, what you want to offer them does concern me especially when you want me to help out."
I look to Ros and her jaw is slightly open as is mine.
Ros quickly recovers "we're offering them 325 but they want 350"
"I see." Ana says, giving nothing away.
"Okay two questions: How do you know so much about them and I was reading your file, you've worked with AHAK since your were in your teens, how did you land that because I tried for two years and they would never respond?" Ros asks.
"Well, my adoptive mother's is Kashmiri but her family settled in Delhi after the partition and her sister is married to Rish Kapadia of Kapadia Global Industries and my grandfather's company is AHAK International based in San Francisco. All these families know each other and as I result I know all the histories and the ins and outs of that world."
"Wait, you're Abdul Karim's granddaughter? You're part of the AHAK family?" Ros looks at me completely surprised. "Christian, she's part of the AHAK and KGI family!" She looks back at Ana who is a little stunned by Ros' behavior. "I suddenly have so many more questions, which I will get to but first, I'm so sorry for your loss. Why are you here, shouldn't you be with family?" Ros says with concern, finally calming down a bit.
Ana swallows and gives a small smile; I can tell she's really uncomfortable now. "My entire family is in India right now and it's okay. They'll be back soon and I'll spend time with them then."
Ros smiles back and nods. "If you don't mind me asking, I believe KGI made a go at Rahman Industries 2 years ago. Correct? Any idea what they offered them and why it never panned out?"
"Philosophical differences and I'm afraid I can't volunteer any concrete details of that deal. I was told that information in confidence. I hope you can understand that." Ana says.
"I understand. I appreciate you taking the time to explain all this to us. We'd love for you to join us in the next negotiation meeting, I think you will be a tremendous help. It's on Wednesday at 10am."
"I'll be there... Can I ask you something Ros?"
"Sure thing Ana."
"Are you using the Rahman's to get your feet wet in the market to significantly expand your holdings in India?"
"Ideally yes, that would the 5 year goal for GEH to have a significant presence in that region."
"Don't. India is extremely volatile with over 470 dialects and a shit ton of minority uprisings, they are still dealing with the effects of residual colonialism and an ineffective, morally corrupt and nationalistic governments every 5 years... not to mention the constant threat of nuclear war with Pakistan. Even if you reach the level to take on someone like, say, the Ambani's it will be brutal and strain your holdings across the board. Having a decent sized presence in India should suffice and show your seriousness in that part of the world. It's better to be in the conversation than completely dismissed because you bit off more than you could chew. That entire region is ruthless and no non south asian legacy continues on intact. It's a geo-political mess. Look to other countries in the region, Sri Lanka, Bangladesh, Pakistan even, the Chinese have invested heavily into Pakistan and now the Russians are looking to do so too. India is in a word... messy but that's what happens when you have so much going on. Spread the wealth, don't concentrate it all in India."
Ros looks visibly shocked. "Thanks Ana, I will definitely take that under consideration."
"In addition, regardless of the meeting's outcome tomorrow, invite Mrs. Rahman and her family over for dinner, not to wine and dine, Mrs. Rahman is a devout Muslim, she doesn't drink and follows the halal rules for food, her children aren't as religious so as long as you strike a good balance between the two you'll be good. You can choose amongst yourselves who will host her. She has three children, two of whom are based in Seattle with their families, a son who is a neuroscientist and a daughter who is professor of mathematics at University of Washington. This gesture will mean a lot to her. She's not enamored by all of this" Ana waves her hand dismissively "She is looking to give her baby away to another loving family. If you can show her that, it will be smooth sailing all throughout the acquisition procedure. These little gestures mean a lot in the south Asian culture, it will also show her the kind of values you were raised with. Even if you don't end up acquiring her company, this gesture will still speak volumes and she'll put a good word out in the community there should you decide to make another move in that market."
Ros nods and I just stare at her in wonder and quietly nod. "Thanks for all this information Ana, we really appreciate it." She gives a small smile and nods.
We quietly eat for a bit.
"You mind if I make a quick phone call, a few of the assets listed in their file caught my attention and I want to double check something with a contact of mine?"
"Yeah sure, go ahead."
She gets up to make a phone call and walks away from us to the window overlooking the skyline. I hear her speak in Hindi and she looks incredibly serious. Ros is saying something but I can't be bothered, I can't stop looking at Ana when I feel Ros poke me with a chopstick.
"What the fuck Ros." I whisper.
"You son of bitch. You like her don't you? I just caught you staring her ass." She whispers back.
"Fuck off Ros. You're delusional." Fuck me. She will never let me live this down.
"This gives me so many ideas. I am going to have so much fun with this." Ros gives me a sly smile.
Ana starts to make her way back to us. "Thank you for waiting. I have a hunch about some of their south indian investments and I'm just waiting to hear back on the latest on that. I'll email you all and let you know as soon as I do."
"Sounds good. So, I have a few questions if you don't mind?" Ros asks innocently.
"Sure, ask away."
"If you're related to the AHAK family, you essentially come from money so why work for GEH. Are you a spy?" Ros cackles and Ana cocks her head to one side, smiling.
"Well Rosalyn Anne Bailey, if I was a spy, either the almighty GEH is lacking in security or I'm just that fucking good at what I do given how I landed myself in legal and made friends with you all." She says smugly, shrugging one shoulder suggestively and I can't help but chuckle. Ros immediately looks at me and lets out another cackle. Fuck me, I just gave her more rope to hang me with. Ana continues to giggle and soon we're all laughing.
"In all seriousness, I don't come from money. My adoptive mother and I use the term adoptive loosely since I'm not legally adopted by her, married my father who's from Montesano where I grew up, a real small town life but her extended family embraced me and took me in after my dad died and well, I could have definitely worked with the family company but I didn't... I mean I've definitely worked for AHAK before and did a little freelance stuff for them in college and I've learned a lot but it's complicated and I wanted to create my own identity away from them. I don't want to be only known for my association with them. I think you guys are maybe the 7th or 8th people who know that I'm part of the family outside of the South Asian community. I just ask that you not mention this to anyone... "
"Wow, that's... you really keep that shit under wraps. Sounds like someone else I know" Ros looks at me.
"Ros, everyone has the right to keep their private life private." I grumble.
"Yeah, I don't want to give people the wrong idea. I just visit that world from time to time, I don't live in it. My real life is very different, always has been." She shrugs with a tight smile.
"...but I gotta ask... AHAK is worth 9 billion right now... surely you're set to inherit something through your mother, no?" God, Ros can be so fucking obtuse. I give her a look but she is completely unaware.
"Ros!" I chide
"God... sorry, Ana, I didn't mean it that way. Sorry my social skills can be a little too aggressive sometimes."
I can see Ana slightly taken aback but she quickly recovers. "No, please it's okay. I've actually have never really talked about this stuff out loud with anyone else besides a cousin or two of mine so I just needed second." She giggles.
"AHAK also owns 40% of KGI and KGI themselves are worth 13 billion but their assets are mostly in India, Middle East and South East Asia with a just a few in Europe and the US. But to answer your question, no, I'm not allowed to. South Asian families are really big on bloodline and legacies and since I'm not part of the bloodline, I am not entitled to anything. Honestly, I'm okay with that. Mo money, mo problems and I've got enough drama in my life." She laughs but it's tinged with sadness.
I'm suddenly so intrigued. Nita is set to inherit close to 9.5 billion in assets at least now that her father has passed. And Ana gets nothing? That's fucking ridiculous.
"That's fucked up but I hear you. I guess I just don't understand the conditional love approach here. If they've embraced you then you should be a part of the inheritance."
"I know what you mean but it's futile for me to think about. I've got a life to live, I just focus on that." She smiles but it doesn't reach her eyes.
"Does AHAK provide you with security?" I ask. She looks up to me and is puzzled by the question.
"Um, no. I don't need it. I'm not in any danger."
"Your mother is essentially a billionaire, that puts you all at risk."
She snorts. "Well, AHAK keeps a fairly low profile and are not known for ruffling feathers unlike some people in this building." She says with sass and giggles. She's so fucking adorable and Ros and I chuckle. "So I highly doubt it plus I live here, no one knows that I'm part of the family. I'm good! But thank you for the concern, it's definitely a valid question."
I don't care what she says, she's getting proper security now. I am not risking it. Covert CPO be fucking damned. I'm putting Sawyer back on active CPO duty with her.
"What kind of work did you do at AHAK?" I ask.
"Well, starting in my teens I did a lot of proof reading of official documents and got a basic understanding of the legalities and what to look for during a real estate acquisition and then for year before I started college, I'd spend a couple of weeks here and there in New York with my cousin. I worked on projections to see what were the next upcoming neighborhoods for them to invest in for private development." She finishes with a small smile.
"Why didn't you major in business then?" Ros continues.
"Wasn't interested in it. I had thought for a bit to major in Architecture because I loved urban design but that didn't work out for me financially and since I like reading and analyzing stuff, I decided English literature would be best." She laughs and shrugs.
Ros smiles as she nods. "You know, your grandfather once gave a seminar during our sophomore year at Harvard. It was incredible. His presentation really stuck with me because he talked about the dire need for women in business. That business lacked heart and compassion and how we needed more of that. I've been a little obsessed with him since then."
Ana suddenly takes a sharp intake of breath. "Umm... when was this seminar because he's only given two at Harvard."
"Really? Uhhh it was 10 years ago I think? Right Christian. You were with me too, it was like an extra credit thing for one of our classes... Christian do you remember?"
I suddenly feel the alarm bells go off and my skin goes numb. Ana looks at me wide-eyed and then quickly back to Ros.
"Was it for Dr. Chatterjee's class? 10 years or so ago, it was during President's week."
"Wait. How do you know that?" Ros loses her shit.
Ana suddenly hides her face and when she removes her hands she's beet red and biting her lip. Stop biting that lip baby before I launch myself at you.
"Whenever I had a couple of days off from school, my mom would take me to SF and at the time I was on this new 'I want to go to harvard' streak, my grandmother suggested that we make it a family trip since my grandfather was going anyway for the seminar. So not only did I get a special tour with the President of the school but then later on I actually sat in on that presentation."
"I'm trying to remember now, because Christian and I stayed back to ask him questions as people left, we were like the few last people and I remember him telling us that his family was here. Were you sitting in the front row with a Harvard cap...because he pointed towards a kid sitting in the front row reading while he was answering and talking to a group of us."
Ana gives a small smile and nods. "Yep, that was me. I had gotten a tour earlier that day and was convinced that I was going to Harvard and bought a shit ton of stuff from the bookstore. I was basically a walking mascot." She giggles.
I suddenly realize that I remember her. I don't remember her face but I remember seeing a girl sitting reading a book that had a turquoise color cover and illustration of a cake on it. Fuck... she was there. Ana was there. She was in my life. She was there.
"Holy shit, Steele! I have goose bumps right now. I mean, look where we were 10 years ago. Isn't that incredible Christian?"
I quietly nod and Ros grimaces at my lack of enthusiasm.
"His speech was very inspiring, in fact that day when you spoke to me about the saying your grandmother had it sounded very familiar and it now just made sense to me because your grandfather talked about a similar idea but I couldn't place it until now. It was definitely an inspiration for me when starting GEH, though I suppose you think I've lost my way." I ask her.
"Mr. Grey, as I said earlier, we see things differently. The very same idea was interpreted differently. There are no right or wrong answers, just whatever works for you personally. As long as you're content with your choices and your actions, I suppose that's all that matters. My grandfather built his business over personal relationships and that was mostly because of my grandmother, it was important to her. If he was the brains, she was the brains and heart and they were the perfect balance to each other.
After the Harvard Seminar we went to New York they had over this couple at their apartment that had been in the market to sell their small but lucrative portfolio of buildings along Broadway and Central Park. The buildings had been passed down from their great-grandparents but they only had one child who was sick and it was just too much for them to handle.
They closed that deal over the kitchen table while my grandmother made us all breakfast and I talked to them about my book report. My grandfather promised to honor their child's memory and family legacy. He named one of the high rises they built by Central Park, Elijah House as a gift for their trust." She gives a slight shrug and I see her eyes are slightly red. "Sometimes people just want to see themselves in you because then they know that what they created will continue to thrive in the right hands. It's all about connection."
She holds my gaze and quickly turns to Ros and gives her a small smile. There it is again, the wind is knocked out of me.
"See, that's what I mean. Like, how do you guys just do that, how do you even think about something like that? It's hard to find interviews of Abdul Karim, he barely spoke at conferences or gave interviews. I wanted so badly to intern at AHAK but there were never any openings. He's harder to get to than this guy right here. I just wanted to learn from him but you're the next best thing now" Ros laughs.
Ana giggles. "I don't know about that. Nothing can replace the source." She shrugs. "He just liked keeping a low profile and living a simple life. A lot of AHAK is operated by family and it's a very tight knit operation and he was at the helm of it all. It was important for him to always be home by 6pm, if he wasn't travelling, to have evening tea with his wife. I mean they were a real team. They had a 12 year difference but really relied on her for support. He ran every single business decision by her. AHAK could've gone the distance but after a while he took a step back because of his health, then he wanted to enjoy life and watch their grandkids grow up and travel in peace."
"That makes sense. I'd love to meet you grandmother and talk to her. Does she visit Seattle?"
"No since I moved here, I've been trying to get her to visit and when I do, I'll let you know and we can have dinner together and you can ask her anything. She's an open book though she gives a lot of philosophical advice so you'll have to brace yourself." Ana giggles and Ros smiles.
"What's the best advice your Abdul Karim gave you?" Ros asks.
"Abdul Karim was a bit of an odd bird." She laughs "I kind of had a complicated relationship with him and it was mostly because I wasn't really related by blood but in all my time he's only given me advice once, everything else that I learned from him was because I was always listening to what he was saying whenever he spoke and watching how he treated people. When he gave advice to my cousins I listened and absorbed it and I try to live by it. The advice he gave me specifically came the day before I left for WSU. I was having a really difficult day and I was in my room crying and moping, looking at pictures of my dad cause I missed him and he passed by my room and walked in and sat with me. Again, he'd never done that and he just said this one thing to me." She takes a breath and places her elbows on the table and leans into her clasped hands. "I'm trying to figure the English translation really quickly my head, sorry!" she giggles but it's with profound sadness and my heart aches for her.
"He said something to the effect of 'you have a lot of heart which is your best and worst quality. Worst because you will be met with a lot of crushing disappoint and best because in the long run you will be at peace while the rest of your peers will still be searching. The disappointment will teach you patience and strengthen your foresight, so always look at the bigger picture, always play for the long game." Her eyes water but she quickly recovers and gives Ros a bright smile.
"That's solid advice." Ros smiles and Ana looks down "Yeah, it is." Her voice wavers and I can she's trying to hold back tears.
"I'm sorry for your loss Miss Steele." I say in a low voice.
"Thank you Mr. Grey. I appreciate that." She looks me in the eye and I try to communicate to her that I'm here for her if she needs me.
"So are you Muslim then?" God, Ros really has no fucking filter.
She takes a sip of her water and then proceeds to answer. "Yes. I never had any formal religious training when I was younger but when my mother's family took me in, it was the most natural thing in the world to subscribe to all the teachings."
"Interesting... so I know in south asian traditions some women have arranged marriages, does that still happen? Is that something that you have to consider?"
Ana laughs out loud. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to laugh but it's just a little funny...no I don't. My grandparents had an arranged marriage but that's because that's what happened back then. My grandfather was part of the dwindling Kashmiri Royal family and he was married to my grandmother who was from a prominent family and well... yeah I mean, most marriages were strategic partnerships like the European royal families did. Regular people did the same, your parents were to make the decision to the best of their ability. Nowadays the arranged marriage route is mostly "semi-arranged" for the slightly conservative families... your parents show you a prospect, you choose to even meet the guy and if you think he's worthy, you guys date for a bit and if there's a spark, great, you get married and if there's not... on to next one."
"I find this so fascinating. It feels like a fishbowl experience..." Ros looks at Ana wide-eyed.
"Yeah, it definitely is but I understand the wisdom in it. It's definitely a conversation that requires a lot more time for me to explain." She smiles back at Ros
"So you're allowed to date non-south Asian guys right?"
Ana laughs again. "Yes Ros I am. Again, I'm not held by the same traditions, they've never been forced on me, I adopted them in my life on my own. There are no expectations of me in that way. I mean, my cousin is Indian and she married a white guy."
"Okay but seriously, I know you're single and I know a guy. I think you guys would be perfect." Ros looks at Ana pleadingly almost and Ana rolls her eyes.
"Ros, I hold the key to your sanity in the cookies and as Kim K said... 'let me live'".
"Cut the shit Steele, I'm bored and I need a project."
Ana gives her a look and rolls her eyes. "You're about to have child Rosalyn. That's your new project." and gets up to gather the food and put everything away. I let out a laugh.
"Fuck off Christian. Do you have anymore questions for Ana?" Ros looks at me innocently and I swear I want to throw her from the roof.
"Not really, I've found this entire conversation really informative and intriguing. Thank you for sharing information about your adopted family and culture Miss Steele. It's been an education." I offer a smile.
Ana nods but doesn't smile. "Sure, any time."
"Ana, do you have any questions for us?" Ros asks.
"Um... not really, just another suggestion for Wednesday. When you meet Mrs. Rahman, greet her by saying Asalaam-o-alaikum. She'll appreciate that." Ana smiles her genuine smile at Ros. Smile at me Ana, please.
"Thank you, Miss Steele. See you at the meeting on Wednesday." I offer my hand again, craving the contact and she takes it but quickly pulls away again and walks out.
Ros looks at me and smiles her smug ass bitchy smile.
"I know I'm married but I think I'm in love with her." Ros chuckles.
I smirk. "She put you in your place for a second there Ros."
"And I love how she completely ignores you. She's the first straight woman to be so... unaffected by you but you know what, she's fucking perfect for you."
"What makes you think you know what's perfect for me?"
"Trust me, I know my shit Christian and I am going to get you two together" She laughs.
"Ros. Drop it. I do not date employees."
"Yeah but you sure love to check out her ass. I saw you drink her up. You're a goner. She's hot, Christian. TAP DAT you know you want to." She wiggles her eyebrows and it's like I'm talking to Elliot right now.
...
CG: Ana, I'm sorry about the lunch ambush, Ros told me last minute.
AS: It's okay. It was a work lunch though her Spanish inquisition was a little unexpected.
CG: You did great under pressure.
AS: Only because I like her.
CG: I know you asked for space, but I do have a question and I just need 2 minutes of your time. Tell Travis I called you up about the Rahman meeting tomorrow and meet me in my office for a few minutes? It's just to talk. It's about something you said in our lunch meeting. Andrea will let you through.
She doesn't reply for five minutes and it feels like an eternity.
AS: Okay. I will be up in a few minutes.
I tell Andrea that I have a meeting with Ana and to let her walk through and to not interrupt us. I register her surprise but ignore it.
APOV
What on earth could he want to talk to me about? My mind is racing. I still have goose bumps from the Harvard Seminar connection. Did he see me? I never saw him, I didn't give two shits about the people there in the room, I just listened to the presentation and then got back to my book. I was dying to know what happened to Rose and where her brother went off to.
I walk to Mr. Travis' office to let him know I'll be gone for 10 minutes.
"Mr. Travis, Mr. Grey has called me up to discuss something about the Rahman meeting this week. I'll be right back."
"Sure, I trust the working lunch with Ros went well?"
"Yes it did sir. I was able to give them some insight into the culture and some personal background on Rahman Industries since I know the family history."
"Ana, that's incredible. Happy you're on the team. Let's get this done tomorrow because I'm ready for the next project."
"I'll do my best Mr. Travis." I smile at him and walk out.
It's only a two floor elevator ride but it feels heavy. I exit and walk up to Olivia and Andrea, teeth chattering with nerves.
"Hi Ladies, Mr. Grey asked me to meet with him."
"Sure Ana go ahead and good luck!" Andrea gives me a smile. She probably thinks I'm heading to my death.
"How's his mood? Don't think I can handle being yelled at." I laugh.
"Honestly Ana, you never know with him but I think he's okay... fingers crossed." Andrea smiles at me.
I knock and open the door and see him standing looking out the window while talking on the phone. He turns towards me and walks over. He's dressed to kill as always; a sharp charcoal grey suit with a crisp white shirt and a dark grey tie. Sitting in front of him in Ros' office I was a wet mess. I want to run my hands through his unruly hair. I feel so fucking nervous. I don't know why. I hear the door close and click in place behind me.
He's still on the phone but looking at me, I turn my gaze away, his eyes are too intense for me sometimes. I look to my right across the room and look to his desk as I play with my hands and fingers. He ends the call and puts the phone in his pocket. He's so close that it's driving me nuts. Why must this body betray me?
He strokes my cheek and my temperature immediately rises. "Are you okay? I'm sorry for the third degree with Ros, she needs to learn how to have a fucking filter."
I nod, looking down trying to stop the tears. I'm not sad. I'm conflicted. I'm in mourning I think. I don't know. "It's okay, I know it was coming from a good place. She was just curious." I say, and I mean it. Ros cares for me as a friend. I truly know that.
"I remember this girl from the Harvard seminar. I never saw her face but I remember briefly seeing a girl sitting on the floor, indian style with her hair open and she was wearing a black coat and a Harvard hat, I never got to see her face. The book she was reading and it had a turquoise cover, do you remember what it was?"
Oh god. He remembers. He remembers me. Well, sort of, he never saw my face... we have a starting point. This feels like fate, we are meant to be. I look down and nod as the tears start to fall.
He leans in and kisses my forehead and then holds my face in his hands and raises it to meet his. I look up at him with eyes full of tears and a heavy voice. "It was turquoise with an illustration of a slice of birthday cake. The book was called The Particular Sadness of Lemon Cake."
"I've been so blind to you all this time. You were there at the beginning and I didn't see you." I see the emotion in his face. Please don't look at me like that. Please
"But I didn't see you either. I never looked up." I can barely speak, my voice is thick and strained.
"And I never looked long enough to find you."
I close my eyes and look down again. He wipes my tears and kisses my forehead; both my eyes and cheeks and then a soft chaste kiss on my lips. "I love you Ana."
"I love you, Christian. I wish we could've saved each other back then." He pulls me in for a hug and I do my best to not let the damn break but I fail.
"Don't cry baby. We're here for each other now. Don't cry." He kisses my hair and soothes me. We stand in each other's embrace for what seems like an eternity.
"Baby, I know you agreed to a covert CPO but this isn't up for debate. You need proper security. Please. I am not going to take any chances. As soon as your grandfather's will is read and a statement is released, news will spread in the business community and you don't know what threats are out there against AHAK and KGI. Nita's life is about to change as well."
"But I'm a nobody Christian. Literally only Daniel's family, your family, Ros and Kate's family knows my connection to AHAK. No one here at GEH knows anything."
"Anyone motivated can figure out the connection if they look hard enough. Ana, this is not up for further discussion. Sawyer is going to take you home and bring you to work from now on."
He's right. I rationally know this but I fucking hate this infringement on my independence. I didn't ask for any of this. Why can't this be simple? I look up at him, his beautiful face. I've missed it.
"Okay fine." I acquiesce. He gives me a genuine smile and leans in to kiss me but I stop him. "You'll get my lipstick all over your lips" I say as I use my thumb to remove traces of red from the earlier kiss.
"As much as I love that color on you. I think I'm going to have to ban you from wearing it to work. It's an occupational hazard for me." He smirks and I can't help but giggle like schoolgirl.
"You look so beautiful today." He kisses the corner of my mouth.
"You don't have to say that Christian...I..." I trail off unable to complete the sentence because I'm too overcome with emotion again. I'm a fucking mess of a person. Why do you continue to be so nice to me?
"You're exquisite to me in every way, Ana. You know I'm here for you baby, right?"
I nod. "I do and I'll be fine. I should go back before I get fired." I chuckle and make my way to turn but he holds me in place and looks into my eyes, searching for I don't know what. He kisses my forehead but lingers for a second before letting me go. I inhale his scent and soak in his warmth that I miss every night.
I miss him so much.
Authors Note: Hopefully you all hate me a little less? I know some reviews have been asking for a time jump because it's too many sad ass vibes but being human is complicated so you might wait till i've posted te next 3 chapters to read again cause major drama for your mama about to happen y'all. Till then, who's Team Ros?
Pinterest: www dot pinterest dot com/paleseptember10/50-shades-of-love-and-light/ - check out the chapter 25 board :)
Music:
Nothing's Wrong - HAIM
