Kill Them
I couldn't sleep that night. I don't want to believe it. Why would Natsu do that? He hated my father? He hated Sting? If he wanted revenge, why did he offer me the arrangement? Why not a real relationship?
There are many questions swirling inside my mind. And I am determined to look for their answers.
Before I met with Natsu in a restaurant, I decided to call Levy and Cana to search for information about him.
"Natsu's the youngest guy among the Fairy Tail Group of Companies. He's twenty three when the ambush happened. He's 26 right now. I'm sure you know his businesses already?" Cana confirmed. She's my primary source of information, after all.
"Doesn't he has other affiliates aside from the Dreyars and the Drakes?" I asked. I should've done this a long time ago...
"Us, Lucy... There's the Black Steel, Ars Magia, Crush, 'ya know... Companies who are owned by the people you've met in Erza's wedding."
"And?" Levy looked at her expectantly. She's probably waiting for Cana to spit personal information about him. Well, I am too.
Cana rolled her eyes, "We're not that close, Pipsqueak. My father said that there's nothing fishy going on between them. Purely business, that's all. Pops knows since that's a joint project of Drakes Realty and Clive Lands, they're partners and she's the one representing the Alabaster's Furnitures. Ugh..." Cana tightly closed her eyes because of irritation, " I really hate the guts of that girl."
"Wasn't close to her too but you know... I just feel something's off with her..." Her eyes shifted from playful to serious before continuing, "Natsu and I almost share the same father but I will never forgive him if he hurt you."
Cana's protectiveness touched my heart. She doesn't really express herself like this. Not affectionate. Though her version of affection might differ from other people since hers includes boobs grabbing and platonic body touchings.
"Hmm. Gajeel said once that he's Natsu's cousin. His father and Natsu's were brothers. Wendy is their cousin too so they're probably affiliated with him," Levy paused, as if remembering all the important details that her boyfriend told her.
"Aside from that... hmm... what about the government, Lu? His father is a retired General and his brother, Zeref Dragneel is a General too. Fiore Forces, Lu? Do you think they're involved with this? I mean the ambush three years ago?" Levy speculated.
I swallowed. I have no answer to her questions. We both looked at Cana in hopes that she has one but the latter just shrugged apologetically while joking about hw she doesn't care about Natsu so she didn't bother knowing things about him. I also don't want to ask Natsu about these matters. I don't want him to find out that I have an inkling to whatever's happening. I want to end this one his way.
"Good evening..." his gorgeous smile made me forget my ideas for a moment.
He kissed me on the cheek. I chose to meet in a restaurant instead of going to any of out condo units. He's holding a paper bag which he placed on the table.
"Did I make you wait?" He looked at his expensive leather wristwatch.
I shook my head even if I've been here for a while now. He's not late. In fact, he's five minutes early. It's just that I happened to arrive here fifteen minutes before our call time.
"Shall we order?" he asked, forehead wrinkled.
I nodded while accepting the menu from the waiter.
I know he's still staring at me. My heart is jumping up and down because of his fixed gaze on my but I forced my eyes to remain on the menu.
"I'll have White Truffle Risotto," while giving it back to the waiter.
I turned to Natsu and caught him staring at me. He told the waiter for his additional orders before returning his eyes on me. When the waiter left us, he fully gave his attention to me.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
I smiled, "I'm fine... How's your trip?" I avoided his eyes.
"Well, it's fine. I'll be busy with the upcoming project. We'll build three towers of condominium around Malyi. We're still on the planning process but this project is going to be big. How about you? You went to Sorciere last night? You didn't reply after my last text."
"Yup. I went home early and slept. I got tired so..." I still can't look t him straight in the eye.
"Are you okay, Luce? Did something happen while I'm away that you aren't telling me?" his voice is soft and gentle, peacefully stroking every corner of my heart.
I hated that I trusted him. But I'm angrier on myself because I know what he wants from me but I still trust him. I still trust him. Damned. Much.
"I'm just hungry..." I said "Nothing special happened. Just the usual..."
"Okay... We'll eat when the food is served. I missed you..." he said in his usual sweet voice.
I took a deep breath and smiled at him. "I missed you too," Damnit!
He smiled back. It's genuine. He's good in acting.
"Your birthday's next week? What's your plan?" he asked.
"The usual..."
"The usual? What do you usually do on your birthday?"
"Hmm... Bar with Cana and Levy with some of our friends? That's probably it..."
"Family dinner, no?" He raised an eyebrow at me.
I stared at him. I feel like everything he'll ask about my family would be suspicious for me, "No. I don't do that."
Although I want a dinner with my dad and mom, I know they won't give me that.
Natsu inhaled a deep breath. I glanced at him. I am not sure of his expression. His eyes are dark.
"Can I go with you on your birthday?" he asked, "I'll clear my sched."
I was about to answer but the food arrived. The waiter placed our orders in front of us. Natsu's still looking at me expectantly, waiting for my answer which didn't come.
"Let's eat?" I asked.
He nodded before turning to the food.
The both of us ate in silence. This is unnerving. We're not usually like this. We never ran out of topic everytime we're together. I know he also feels the awkwardness because I felt his constant glance at me.
I wiped my lips when I finished eating. He mimicked my actions.
"Are you okay?" he asked.
"Yup." I lied again.
"Luce, you're not okay."
I'm annoyed with how he knows to differentiate when I'm fine and when I'm not. I'm annoyed because he already knows me. I'm annoyed because in that short time we spent together, I feel like he's more adept with my actions compared to my parents who gave birth to me and who also don't know even a tiny detail about myself. I bet they don't even remember my fucking birthday!
"Natsu, I want out of this arrangement."
He didn't talk. He just continued drinking his wine and looked at me seriously after emptying his glass.
"For what reason?" he calmly asked.
I became nervous. No. My heart hurts. I feel like it has been crushed to pieces and I don't understand why I'm feeling this way.
"I am tired of it," I formally said.
"You are tired of it? We didn't meet for four days and now you're tired?" I heard the mixture of pain and shock in his voice.
"Isn't it allowed? Haven't we made it clear from the very start? That when one of us wants out, we would stop this?"
"I want a better excuse from you. Why do you want to be out of this arrangement, Lucy?"
I gritted my teeth, "Why are you asking a personal question anyway? If I told you I want out then I want out! Isn't that the rile in each hook up? If one doesn't want to continue anymore, break it up. Besides, you can choose other girls, why me?"
I saw the obvious shock plastered in his eyes.
"We both decide on this. I don't want to. I don't want to so we won't stop this!" the tune of his voice started to rise.
"Aren't you tired of me, Natsu? We've been on this arrangement for months! You are known for being a man who don't recycle woman! You should be tired of me now! But why aren't you finished with me yet?" my voice also started to rise.
"Luce, please don't drag my past here..." he almost begged.
Seeing him like this annoyed me. No, what annoyed me is how he can touch my heart using just his voice.
"Drag your past? I am not! I'm just stating a fact! Anyway, please respect my decision, Natsu. I don't want to do this anymore. I want out. Let me go..." I calmly said.
I don't know why my insides are shaking. I want to cry. I want to let all of my frustrations out. I slowly but painfully felt how my heart is being crushed to pieces. Fuck! Am I falling for him? No! No! No, Lucy!
"I guess you're right... We should end this arrangement," Natsu said, voice is now calm.
I was shocked with what he said. I thought it would be hard to break this up. His eyes on me are intense and piercing while he's saying that.
"We should stop this..." he continued.
I can't speak. I also can't breathe. But my expression remained the same. I will never let him see what I'm feeling.
"We should stop this arrangement, this stupid hook up, Lucy..." his eyes became clouded by an emotion I cannot name, "Let's not kid ourselves. You and I both know what we really are. Even in the beginning, you know everything is out of the arrangement."
My lips trembled. I know where is this headed and I'm scared.
"Don't ask personal questions my ass but you've asked me a lot of that. I did, too... even in the beginning of this, there's no hook up that happened," he said.
I shook my head. I know what he means and I'm scared because I liked it. I wanted it too but I also know that I shouldn't let that happen. He's just using me! He's only using me! He knows my weakness! He knows I allowed him inside my life. He made himself an important part of me. And now, I'm scared that he's just one of those people who are putting up with me just because of my utility! He's one of those people I love dearly... who only want me to finish whatever they wanted me to do.
"Luce, you're right. We should end our stupid arrangement. I want a real relationship with you. I want to be the one who'll pick you up every after work. I want to be there on your birthday. I want you to spend your weekends with me. I want a vacation with you. I want your paintings on my condo. I want your scent on my sheets. I want you on me, Luce."
The corner of my eyes heated. I can't believe what he just said! But that's all a lie right? Just to get to me! Or to get to my father! Or to get to whatever he wants, right?
I shook my head, "I don't want that. I want out. I want out of this. I want out of you..."
Natsu's jaw dropped. He slowly drank his wine on his wine glass. He didn't speak for a few minutes.
I stared at him. He cannot bring himself to look at me now. I drank my water, hoping that through that, the tears on the corner of my eyes would vanish.
"I... I am not happy with this. I want out of this relationship, Natsu."
He nodded and took a dee breath before meeting my eyes. His stare was as cold as ice. I didn't back down. Maybe through this, the tears that are threatening to come down would get frozen too.
"I understand," his voice cracked. "Do you want to go home? I'll send you home."
"No. I can go home alone. I have my car with me"
He bit his lower lip, "Are you with Sting? Are you back with him?"
I didn't answer. I grabbed my bag and placed it on my shoulder. He didn't look at me when I stood up.
"Goodbye, Natsu."
I quickly walked away from the restaurant. I left him sitting alone on our table. Hot tears quickly streamed to my cheeks as soon as I got out. Fuck, I do love him! I thought he's true! I really thought...
I started my car's engine. I almost can't see the road because of the tears that are obscuring my view.
My phone rang. I grabbed it when I got stuck in traffic. I clicked the loudspeaker button when I answered. It's from daddy!
"Dad..." I greeted.
My voice is trembling but I know he won't notice it.
"Where are you?" he asked.
"I'm driving. Along Fiore Main Road —"
"Go to Eucliffe's mansion, quickly. We're here —"
"Dad, I can't. I need to go home. I'm tired-"
"I need you to come here right now!"
Dad's voice thundered and I know it's one of his orders that I cannot refuse.
"Dad, I am sick and I just want to go home..." I almost cried in desperation.
"Are you sick or are you with Dragneel?" He coldly asked, "Lucy, I know you're a good child. You're obedient. I know that... So please come here and we'll talk!"
He ended the call. My eyes widened before hitting the steering wheel. Sting told dad about me and Natsu? Can this day get worse?
I don't want to obey daddy. For once I want to do things my way but I have to see him to. I need to see him. I want answers! And he's the only one who can answer my questions!
I quickly drove towards Sting's mansion in Flavus. My eyes caught a glimpse of him standing on the staircase with hands on his pockets while waiting for me.
I went out of my car in front the stars and didn't bother to properly park.
"How dare you tell dad!" I shouted at him.
"He'll eventually know even if I didn't tell him! You two have lost your minds! You're going public, Lucy!"
I walked past Sting and went inside their house. I saw Loke and Virgo talking on the living room. They were startled by my arrival so they both stood up in panic.
"Lucy!" Loke called but I ignored him.
I walked straight to the Eucliffe's dining are and saw that they're complete. Sting's mom and dad, his uncle who's also dad's partner, daddy, Auntie Michelle, Loke and Virgo's mom... they're all there and staring at me.
"Lucy, sit down, dear..." Sting's mom greeted me.
I couldn't move from where I'm standing. Sting pulled me towards a seat but I don't want to sit. I looked at all of them. I'm furious and I saw the obvious shock in their faces.
"What is it, Dad?" I asked as I violently turned to him.
Dad's jaw hardened while looking at me, "Is it true? You're dating Natsu Dragneel? Aren't you supposed to be with Sting?"
Aunt Michelle laughed, "Jude, that kid's hardheaded. She's been like that ever since."
My jaw clenched. I stopped myself from talking shit just because of my anger. I want answers to my questions and I need it now!
"I am disappointed, Lucy. I really thought you and Sting are perfect for each other," Sting's mom said.
I want to laugh. Perfect for each other? How can we be perfect? He's a cheat and a liar! But then maybe I am a cheat and a liar too? That's why we're perfect for each other!
"Sit down, Lucy!" Daddy ordered.
I didn't obey him. This would be the first time I wouldn't follow his orders. This is just a small order but it's a huge thing for me.
"So what if I'm dating Natsu Dragneel?"
"Have you lost your mind? Why are you dating our enemy?" Daddy's palm met the table violently.
Silence ate every person in the room. Sting's mom tightly closed her eyes while his dad shook his head.
"Enemy? How did he become your enemy, huh? Didn't you made a deal with them? Didn't you close a deal involving the firearms with them?" I asked, putting emphasis on every word.
"Lucy, we closed that deal because we need the numbers they offered. Drakes is failing and they made that deal to find an evidence to a crime three years ago," Loke, who's now standing beside daddy with his arms crossed, tried to explain.
"A crime three years ago? Of course! That... That crime! The ambush of Senator Alabaster's wife with the late General Igneel Dragneel in that van too right? The ambush which killed them both? They want evidence because of that crime! Why is your company involved?" I shouted.
All of them stayed silent. I can't believe it! I can't believe this! Is this true?
"Dad..." I cried while looking at my father, hoping for him to deny my claims. I have a very high respect for him. I wanted his approval and I craved for his attention, "We're you involved with their deaths?"
They didn't answer. Daddy is just staring at me. He's just looking at me like he just wants to see how everything is tearing me apart.
"Did you kill them?" I forced myself to say.
They didn't answer. Daddy took a deep breath.
"DID YOU KILL THEM?" My shout echoed inside the spacious house.
Fuck! They can't answer me!
"Lucy... please..."
"Did you kill them, dad? Please answer me..." I broke down.
