A/N: Tyy and I wanted to explore more what happened between Boruto and Nyoko, and how she still affects him in our current timeline. We also included how Sarada reacts to it. This filler happens after the first filler, Moving Forward.

Guide for the transitions:

Three dots for a transition happening in the same period (a few hours, days, weeks, later).

A single line is to change perspective between Boruto and Sarada.

Two lines is to indicate the beginning and end of Boruto's university days with Nyoko.

We don't own Naruto/Boruto.


The first week back in the office always felt slow, but happy. Happy because it was chill and the holiday cheer could still be felt. Slow because everyone was still on vacation mode and it was hard to switch back into the work groove instantaneously. The upside was that Boruto was working while she was on leave, meaning things were covered but it was also a little disconcerting since she opened her inbox to hoards of email from him.

Filtering it by subject, Sarada got to work and read all of them, opting not to reply just yet and collate her questions. Maybe she could sit down in his office and file through them one by one instead, that would surely be faster. Besides, there were more than two hundred emails, it would take her at least more than an hour to sort it all out.

Once Sarada finished, she read over her notes again and picked up a pen before heading over to Boruto's office. She didn't knock, opening it by a crack and peeking in before calling out his name. "Boruto? Can I have a minute, please?"

He was sitting at his desk as he would be any other time, but his head was downcast, buried in his hands, fingers tangled in his hair while his elbows were propped on the dark mahogany. "What is it?" He asked so quietly she almost didn't hear him.

Her lips parted, dark eyes going wide. He was different today, not like how he was texting her a few days ago. Definitely not like how he was during the play or the Secret Santa event. "Umm…" She didn't know what to do. "I just had some questions but I can come back later." Although she knew she should leave, Sarada found herself walking inside, carefully approaching him from the other side of the desk.

"Is there something I can do for you?" Sarada asked quietly.

Though it was subtle, there was a noticeable tremble to his hands and a shift in his breathing. "I'm fine." He whispered. "Now is just… not a good time. Please take my calls."

"Okay." Sarada stood there a little longer, chewing on her lower lip if she should ask more or not. Ultimately she told him before leaving, "I'm here if you need me."

Sarada closed his door softly and stood outside a little longer, feeling at a loss. It was almost like she didn't recognize him. Going back to her desk, she typed her questions for him instead and hit send. All of the emails that had her in copy, but were addressed to Boruto, she replied to if it was within her power.

It was strange. She never knew seeing him so sad could make her feel the same.

Over lunch, Sarada noticed that Boruto wasn't coming to join in. For a moment she thought to go over and call him but she caught Shikadai speaking to Naruto, and holding on to his lunch.

"Yeah, I know." Shikadai sighed. "I'll talk to Boruto."

Talk to him about what?

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The time flew by for Sarada, but she still felt something was wrong. Boruto was sad about something and she was sure it had nothing to do with work. But if it was personal and affected him so much, he shouldn't have come at all. Maybe she could talk to him on their way home, try to ease him into the conversation to open up.

Inojin stretched and sighed. "I think it's time to call it a day."

Sarada looked up from her screen. "It's only five-thirty."

"Yeah but Boruto left half an hour ago and we finished this brief so we're good to go."

"What?" Sarada blinked. He already left? Boruto always came by her desk and would offer her a ride home.

Inojin raises a brow. "Yeah. Didn't he come by to tell you—you know, like he always does?" He smirked.

No, he didn't. But Sarada ignored Inojin. "Just get back to work already." She wasn't sure if she was telling herself or Inojin that.

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It was hard to sleep that night for Sarada, feeling like something wasn't right. It wasn't really like her to take things so personally, that happened to people in the office but it felt different with Boruto. The way he spoke to her, or lack thereof, really threw her off.

The following morning, Sarada passed by the bakery and purchased an assorted box of pastries for her and the team. She hoped that when she got back to the office, he would be back to normal, but if not, the pastries should help. Sarada would have baked it herself but didn't have the time. To make up for it, she bought another cup of coffee, just for Boruto.

He was already in the office, the laptop opened up and his briefcase was on the floor. But he wasn't at his desk. Sarada entered anyway, placing the cup of coffee down on his desk and arranging it with tissue underneath. Carefully, she set the box down and tried to guess which one he would take for breakfast.

Boruto walked in a few seconds later, blue eyes dull and lifeless. He looked as if he hadn't slept in days, and didn't even react to seeing her. There was no cheeky smile, no warm greeting. Just a fleeting glance as he walked around his desk and sat down.

The shock was evident in Sarada's face but she schooled her features as soon as he sat down. There was something wrong. It wasn't her place to ask or to pry. He didn't even acknowledge her.

"Good morning, Boruto." Although she wanted to smile, she couldn't manage to. There were a million things going through her mind on what might be wrong and what she could do to help. "Have you had breakfast? I brought some for the team."

He dragged his hand through his hair and let out a long sigh. "No… I haven't been feeling well. Can't eat much. I'm sorry." He spoke so quietly and still didn't look at her, though he did catch sight of the coffee on his desk and moved his arm to wrap his hand around it. "For me?"

Sarada nodded. "Yes. It goes well with cinnamon rolls," she whispered.

"Thank you, Sarada," Boruto said as he picked up one of the cinnamon rolls and left it on a napkin. "Maybe I can eat after all."

Since he accepted it, her heart felt lighter but it didn't mean she was already satisfied. "Please do." She eyed his tie, it was loose and unkempt and his eyes looked dead. Sarada bit her lower lip. "Boruto…" It was really not her place to ask but it was bothering her to see him like this.

"No." He quipped as if he knew what she wanted to say. His voice was still quiet, but broken. "Sarada, please. Just… I'm okay."

A wave of anger washed over her. He was blatantly lying to her when she was just concerned. Even if she was angry, Sarada didn't show it.

"If you say so." She picked up the box of pastries and left his office. Her anger didn't stay for long as it was quickly replaced with her heart tightening in her chest.

All she could think about that day was why Boruto wouldn't tell her why he was so sad.

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Naruto sent an invitation to Sarada, Chocho, and Inojin to his office the following afternoon. Her heart was racing, wondering why he had to call the three of them into his office. Sarada hadn't seen Boruto that day, although all of his belongings were in his office. Chocho and Inojin seemed nervous as well, but for other reasons.

The president sat behind his desk, and Konohamaru was there, too.

"I'm sorry my invitation was so sudden, but I had to tell you that Boruto will be taking an extended leave from today to the following week."

It was hard to read Naruto's expression. Sarada kept quiet, letting Chocho and Inojin react and ask the question even though she wanted to know.

"Huh? Why?" Inojin raised a brow. "He didn't tell us he was going to."

Konohamaru stepped in, answering for Naruto. "It's actually a sick leave. Any work and decisions that need to be made, you can course it through Sarada."

"And if you feel you need higher approval, please direct it to me for the time being," Naruto added, looking at Sarada's eyes.

"Yes, sir. Of course." Sarada nodded obediently. "Can I know if Boruto's okay, though?"

Chocho and Inojin gave her a look. Konohamaru looked at Naruto before turning his gaze back to Sarada.

"He's fine, Sarada. My wife and daughter are taking care of him." Although Naruto smiled, Sarada didn't return it.

The three of them were dismissed. And instead of celebrating like Inojin and Chocho were that they wouldn't have their boss around for a week, Sarada felt the exact opposite.

"You two go ahead," she told them. "I have to stop by supply chain for a while."

Sarada hurriedly walked over to the department, seeking out the one person whom she knew always had the answers to everything. "Shikadai."

He looked up from his laptop, quite surprised to see her but gave her an easy smile. "Hey. Did I miss an email from you?"

"No." Sarada cut in quickly. "I need to talk to you." She looked at his other teammates. Even if they looked like they were minding their own business, she knew they were listening. "Alone."

When she took that tone, Shikadai knew he didn't have a choice. Sarada led him to Boruto's office and closed the door behind them. She didn't bother sitting down, only getting right into business when Shikadai turned to face her.

"What's happening to Boruto? He isn't okay. Don't lie to me." She hated it whenever people did.

Not looking the least bit surprised by the question, he only sighed as he looked at her. "Right now, no, he isn't. But he will be." He answered truthfully, knowingly.

"You didn't answer my question." Her lips pressed into a fine line. Shikadai was a smart guy, and he knew how to answer around questions. But she was clear, and Sarada wasn't going to back off until she was satisfied with a straight answer.

Knowing she wasn't playing around, Shikadai stiffened a bit and averted his eyes. "This is a tough time for him, Sarada. It's not really my place to say anything though."

"It isn't my place to ask either, but here we are." Sarada crossed her arms across her chest. "He just dumped all his work on me. I think I deserve to know why." Seeing how depressed Boruto looked, Sarada didn't mind filling in, but if it would scare Shikadai into talking, she would act as if she was.

Shikadai's face fell, a look of surprise forming next before finally he looked at her with narrowed eyes. "If you knew, you wouldn't mind helping him out. He's got a lot on his mind right now, Sarada. A few years ago, Boruto lost someone very precious to him. It was during this time of the year and he never takes it well."

Losing someone was a pain Sarada couldn't understand, especially because all of her loved ones were still alive and well. Her gaze fell to the floor, silently regretting making it look like work was the reason why she was asking. "I'm so sorry," she whispered. "How long has it been?"

"Friday will be three years." He answered with a quiet sigh. "Don't let it bother you too much, there's not much anyone can do for him right now. He just needs time."

Three years. Sarada did the math, brows furrowing. "Wait, it happened when he was still in college?" Her arms fell to her side.

No, it couldn't be.

Shikadai crossed his arms and nodded once. "Yeah. Junior year."

She sucked in a shaky breath, a hand coming up to cover her mouth. "Oh my god. It was her…"

It was all making sense. The way Boruto's eyes darkened and looked away from her was the same when he told her about his regrets, and how he addressed her the last few days.

"Boruto told you about Nyoko?" Shikadai asked, sounding taken aback, eyes widening slightly as he stared at her.

"I-I didn't know her name," Sarada looked at Shikadai and took in his expression. From the way Boruto spoke about Nyoko, she already knew it wasn't something he told just anyone. "I don't know specifics, but he did mention her to me."

Shikadai frowned and walked over to the window, staring out of it though it didn't seem as if he was actually taking anything in. "Boruto never talks to anyone about her. Even with me… he always loses it."

Thinking back to the time they both had dinner in his office, she remembered how he almost clammed up on her, but he did keep talking. If Shikadai couldn't get Boruto to talk about it, then she wondered why Boruto would tell her. But that wasn't important right now. "He wouldn't tell me what was wrong, though. I've been trying."

"Of course he didn't. I'm sure he wouldn't want to choke on his words and break down in front of you… or anyone for that matter. As I said, he wouldn't talk to me either and I was there when everything happened."

She held on to her heart, fearing it would break if she didn't. "Will he really be okay?"

Turning back around, Shikadai nodded solemnly. "He will. But right now, he needs to focus on himself—and her. Don't worry about it," he walked over and laid his hand on her shoulder. "Okay?"

Although Sarada didn't agree with Shikadai, she kept quiet. It was a personal matter and it had absolutely nothing to do with her. Asking around and calling Boruto about it was just going to make her look nosy and cause him unnecessary pain. "What usually happens until Friday?"

Shikadai gave her a sad smile and said, "He'll just be in his head for a bit. And Friday, he will go sit with her. After that, he will feel better. Don't worry, we'll have him back in no time."

Her fists clenched. "He's so stupid," she muttered.

"Yeah? I'm sure he'd agree with you on that." Shikadai laughed lightly and patted her shoulder before stepping away. "I'm sure he'll be back Monday morning, just take it easy until then."


Wintertime was filled with bitter, unrelenting cold. It was harsh, stressful and Boruto felt that way more-so than most. For him, it was the worst time of the year.

It was always tolerable until the new year hit, that was when reality set in for him and he was overwhelmed with grievous emotions, agonizing memories and a pricking, intense pain in his chest that made it hard for him to breathe.

Sleep was out of the question, even his work was slacking and he couldn't bring himself to focus on any of his tasks and what was worse, he couldn't even be bothered to care. There were other, more important things on his mind and right now, those things deserved his undivided attention.

Boruto was aware this time was approaching quickly but that awareness did him no good. He was never prepared for the onslaught of depression that washed over him on the first day of that week, every single year. It always started with a dream, but that dream was the most horrific nightmare and it was all the more frightening because it was real.

That first day always began with Boruto jolting awake, gasping for air and clawing at his tight, aching chest. Covered in a cold sweat, tears spilling down his cheeks. It always took him several moments at least to finally begin calming down.

He was never truly calm though and that was only the beginning of his hellish week.

That first day, even though he literally felt as if he was on the verge of death, Boruto still forced himself to about his day. This year, that meant going to work. There were people depending on him and Boruto took his work seriously, so of course, he tried his best to keep going—to just be himself and live his life normally as he would any other time.

But it just wasn't happening for him.

The week before had already been difficult. He was a mess, forgetting important things and tuning people out when they were talking to him. It got worse by the day, but he never wanted to just give in and admit that he needed time. He was already leaving earlier in the day, sometimes even by lunch, but it wasn't enough.

Boruto desperately needed time.

This pain was brutal, consuming him wholly and making it so he could concentrate on nothing more. He'd tried to be precarious, working ahead as much as he could before things got to be too much. That time had come though and Boruto knew he had to take a step back. His dad would understand—he had to. Only a select few people would, but Naruto was one of them. After all, he'd been one of the ones helping Boruto move forward after experiencing true devastation for the first time in his life.

So, Boruto knew he had to think about his own mental health and his workload and on Wednesday he couldn't put it off any longer.

On his way to Naruto's office, Boruto just wished the hurt would go away and he could feel numb. It seemed so much more appealing, that he could handle. This though, he couldn't.

His father already looked to him apologetically, blue eyes full of pity that Boruto couldn't even be mad about. The younger Uzumaki's face was contorted in anguish, dark circles under his red-rimmed eyes. Boruto was always one to present himself professionally, but today—and for the past several days—his hair and his clothes were in disarray.

Naruto had been trying to give him his space, knowing Boruto never did well with having him comfort him. It had seemed like a more appropriate idea to have Shikadai speak with him, but that hadn't been fruitful either. Seeing him like this and knowing firsthand how much he was suffering had Naruto on his feet and crossing his office to pull his son into a tight, loving hug. That was when Boruto broke down and sobbed for the first time.

With his face buried in his father's chest and his hands fisting the shirt on his back, Boruto let himself succumb to the pain. He let it out while Naruto held him, whispering sweet words that did nothing to soothe him. For a long time, he cried and he was still an emotional wreck by the time Himawari took over for Naruto.

She was truly his strongest pillar of support, the two of them holding each other, on their knees of their father's office floor while their parents and Konohamaru spoke softly by the closed door.

Everything after that was a blur for Boruto. Until the next day when he woke up in his old bedroom. The bedroom he had grown up in. He knew what to expect, his parents and especially his sister doing whatever they could to help him get through the period of depression that would pass after that dreadful day was finally behind him. Hopefully.

That dreadful day was tomorrow and tomorrow, he would be by her side every second until it was over.


"Don't tell me you're tired right now." Boruto scoffed as he laid on his bed on his back, his left arm under his head and his pillow while Nyoko shifted closer to him. She was laying her head on his chest the next instant and his right arm curled around her small frame. "You slept nine hours last night…"

"But I am," she mumbled, nuzzling her cheek on his chest. "I just want to lie down."

"Fine but when you wake up, we're going for food. You're obviously not eating well which is causing this lack of energy and—" he let his hand wander down over her side and back up her back. "You've been losing weight recently."

"Don't touch me," she slapped his hand away playfully, hiding her smile. "I changed my diet."

"Mmhmm, I noticed." Boruto snorted. "I'm changing it back."

Nyoko gave him a pointed glare, her lower lip jutting out by the smallest bit. "I'm not eating Thunder Burger."

"You are, and you're gonna love it." He grinned at her, bringing his right hand around her head to poke her cheek. "Maybe we will both start getting a little chunky. You'll be so soft and then you can smack me a lot more."

Nyoko hummed and rested her head back on his chest. "If I get soft the more you won't want to stop holding me."

"Exactly." He wasn't about to deny it, but he was happy to hold her now, sliding his arm back down while bringing the other from under his pillow to wrap around her as well. "Holding you is fun no matter what though." A smile tugged his lips apart and he winked at her.

"Don't say those things to me if you don't mean it," Nyoko scoffed and hid her face on his chest, pulling the blanket up to cover herself.

But I do mean it. Boruto bit his lip at the dangerous turn his thoughts had taken and told himself to calm down. "Sorry… you know I love teasing you." He laughed it off, being honest at least to a certain extent. He did enjoy teasing her, but sometimes he was more serious than she knew and he hated slipping up like that.

She nodded a few times before her breathing slowed, and she fell asleep again. Boruto just shook his head, amazed at how much she was sleeping lately. He supposed he couldn't be too upset though, he wanted her to get as much rest as she needed. Later though, he was definitely taking her to Thunder Burger.

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On the weekends, Boruto was known to attend any parties his friends were having. He didn't mind drowning himself in booze and finding a new girl to play with for the night. This was just the norm for him and he wasn't good with his norm being disrupted.

One Saturday night, it was still relatively early but he'd already had a few drinks—was just getting started on his fourth when someone he never expected to see strolled into the frat house. She was tagging along with Mitsuki and Boruto immediately felt his temper flaring. Excusing himself from the conversation he'd been ignoring anyway, he set his drink aside and then walked over to them.

After giving Mitsuki a cold look, Boruto's blue eyes dropped and softened as he looked into Nyoko's magenta gaze. "What the hell are you doing here, doll?"

She looked up at him and smiled sweetly. "Mitsuki invited me. He said the guys here always make fun of him for being the only one who isn't drinking, and well, I don't drink so he has me."

"You gotta be fucking kidding me," Boruto scoffed, looking over her head and scowling at the smug look on Mitsuki's face. Bastard. "He's a big boy, even if he doesn't act like it." He muttered, glancing back down to her and raising his hand to rest atop her head. "This isn't a place for you, Nyoko. I'll walk you back."

"I just got here!" She exclaimed, brows furrowing. "Don't you want me here?"

Blanching, Boruto held both his hands up defensively and pouted at her. "Of course not! I mean, not that I don't want you around—just not here. These bastards can't be trusted around a girl as sweet as you."

"I can handle myself just fine." She crossed her arms across her chest. "And I came here with Mitsuki because he invited me, unlike someone else."

Mitsuki smiled a little wider. "Of course. I like Nyoko's company, anywhere it may be."

"Thank you," she smiled at Mitsuki and then stuck her tongue out at Boruto.

She wasn't normally so bratty and it was strange for her to agree to come out somewhere like this, but Boruto didn't want her thinking he didn't want her around. "It's just… I know you don't drink and this isn't your type of place at all. And what if somebody tries something…" He was already panicking because he knew he'd lose it.

"Try what?" she blinked.

Feeling his ears burn and eyes widen, Boruto blinked back at her. Of course she wouldn't know. "Tries to you know… touch you or flirt with you or anything like that." It should have been obvious, but she was painfully innocent and always tried to see the good in people.

Nyoko tipped her head to the side. "But you always do that to me, Boruto."

Boruto gasped, blood running cold while Mitsuki snickering behind her. "That's totally different!" He yelled, grabbing her wrist and tugging her against him to hug her tightly. "I can, because I'm a special case."

Nyoko nearly completely disappeared in his arms, her tiny frame engulfed in his embrace. "B-Boruto, stop it!" She tried to push out of his hold but she had no strength.

"Damn," one of the frat boys walked by them. "Get a room, Boruto."

"Bastard," Boruto groaned, still holding tight to her. "See what I mean, we should get out of here."

"Boruto, let go!" Nyoko hit his sides as hard as she could but he didn't even feel it. She did manage to move her head to peek an eye out, though.

"Babyyyy there you aaare!" A girl with long blonde hair and hazel eyes pressed her breasts up at his arm, so close that Nyoko could smell her perfume. "I've been waiting for you, you said five minutes." She pouted and batted her long eyelashes at him.

"Back off," Boruto turned his head to face her, the mood for her or any other girl besides Nyoko long gone. "I'm busy now."

The girl scoffed and turned her nose up in the air, upset to be rejected so harshly. Boruto didn't care about hurting her feelings though, whoever she was.

"You're so mean!" Nyoko huffed, her words muffled since Boruto was still crushing her to him. "Let go of me!"

"Not a chance." He grumbled, facing his head back forward and resting his chin on top of hers. "Unless we can leave."

"But I don't want to leave," she pouted. "I want to see what happens at parties."

"I doubt you'd like it." Boruto sighed, but lifted his head and reluctantly loosened his hold on her. "We will stay for an hour, but you stay by my side. Okay?"

Magenta eyes lit up and she grinned at him, nodding excitedly. "An hour is fine. I just want to know why you're always attending these things, you know? Everyone seems to like it. I feel like I'm missing out."

She really made his heart go crazy. "You're not. This isn't the kind of thing you're into and that's okay. I'm glad for that." He smiled softly, taking her hand and walked with her back to where he left his drink. "We can sit over there on that couch."

"Okay." She hid her hands on the large front pocket of her hoodie—Boruto's university hoodie. She was practically bouncing on the way to the couch, the bun on her head synchronizing with her movements. Once she was settled in, she looked around. "Is this all you do?" She fixed her gaze at him. "Sit on couches and talk to girls?"

"Uhh…" Boruto laughed nervously and scratched the back of his head. "No. I drink and just hang out. Most of the time I'm not sitting."

"Oh," her gaze roamed around again, cheeks blushing and quickly looking away when she saw a couple making out by the door. "Like that?" she asked.

Boruto was certain she didn't want to hear about all the things he did at these parties. He wasn't proud of most of the things he did, so he knew she wouldn't be. But he didn't want to be a heartless liar. "That's not—let's just forget about them." He took a quick sip of his drink and willed himself to calm down.

"Right," Nyoko looked away. "You're right, I shouldn't have even been looking at them." She covered her face with her hands, feeling wildly embarrassed.

"You might see more things like that—and worse. I wasn't lying when I said this wasn't your kind of thing, doll." She was way too pure. "We can leave anytime you want before the hour."

"But this is your thing!" Nyoko leaned against him, face so close to his as she stared at his blue eyes with her magenta ones. "I want to know why you like being at parties."

Boruto felt really low when she was looking at him so softly, not knowing just how stupid he was. "For no good reasons, Nyoko." He said, face showing his disappointment in himself. "You don't need to know shit like that."

"But… I want to know more about you." Her curiosity was relentless. "If you like it, then there has to be something fun or good about parties."

"You know all the important things." Boruto sulked. She didn't need to know about his desire to get wasted and fuck any girl that tickled his fancy for a night—that he absolutely would not ever be able to commit himself to anyone… that he'd never be able to commit to her.

She stared at him a little longer, and she shifted her position on the couch to be able to be at eye-level with him. Nyoko was a small girl, needing to kneel on the couch and hold on to his shoulder for support just to achieve her goal.

"You're handsome and charming, Boruto. Is that all you use to get a girl to sleep with you? Or are they the ones who come on to you like the other girl you were mean to earlier?" She may be innocent but she wasn't dumb. Perhaps Nyoko just wanted to hear it from him other than everyone else, like she always did.

Boruto wanted to say he was innocent—but he wasn't. She was really calling him out and he didn't know how to respond. "Does that matter?" He asked, swallowing hard. He never wanted to look bad in her eyes, but there was no way out of this. She never pried about his 'relationships' before now. "That doesn't matter…" it was the last thing they needed to be talking about.

He was prone to word vomit.

"Why aren't you telling me?" She huffed. "Everyone is so eager to tell me except you."

That had his brows furrowing. "Tell you what? What do they say?" His heart had fallen and he wasn't sure how to feel or what to think exactly—but he could feel that this wasn't going to end well for him.

"That—" She looked away and sat back down. "That you do a lot of things to a lot of girls." Her cheeks turned pink, giving her usual pale complexion a rosy glow. "And they were a lot," She looked at him, her eyes wide. "I don't believe them, though. I'd believe what you'd tell me, that's why I want to know."

Boruto did do a lot, with a lot of girls, but admitting that to her wasn't going to be easy for him—especially when she didn't want to believe it. "Nyoko," he began with a sigh, drink long forgotten. "I never want to talk about other girls when I'm with you. But I can't lie to you and say that I don't see a fair amount of girls." None of them mattered to him though, they were irrelevant.

She didn't speak for a long while, barely even blinking. "Oh. I see." Nyoko turned her gaze away from him and looked around the frat house again. There were more people now, and she could see new couples getting cozy and doing things that she felt was inappropriate for her to be seeing. "I-I think I'll go back, now. But you can stay, don't worry about me."

As if he wouldn't worry. Boruto was worried about her, for more than one reason. For a long time, he had feared their closeness—craving it while wanting to keep her at a safe distance at the same time. Boruto adored her, but he didn't want her to fall in love with a guy like him because he wasn't good enough for her.

"Don't be silly, I'll walk you." He was already on his feet and offering her his hand. "It's late and the drunks are out."

"It's barely ten in the evening." she giggled. "Are you sure, though?" Nyoko asked as she took his hand and got up from the couch, swaying lightly from the head rush. "I don't want you to miss out because of me."

"I'm sure." He nodded quickly, giving her tiny hand a squeeze before ushering her along with him. "You could come back to my room and we can watch a movie if you want."

"You want to come watch a movie with me instead of going back to your party?" It shouldn't have been a surprise to her, but she was. "I don't think that's a good choice."

Boruto held the door open as they walked through and then closed it behind them, breathing in the fresh air outside and relaxing at the much quieter surroundings. "Why not?" He asked with a smile. "You're my best friend, of course I'm always happy to be with you."

"Right. Because we're… friends." She pulled her hand out of his grasp and slipped them back into the hoodie's front pockets. "I think I'll just head back to my dorm. I'm tired."

Was she lying to him? She was always tired lately and it wasn't like her to pass up a movie with him. And she pulled her hand away… "O-okay… You could still stay over though, I wouldn't be upset if you passed out on me."

Her smile widened but she shook her head. "I think I'll sleep for ten hours this time. Or forever." She laughed.

Boruto scoffed at that and threw his arm around her shoulder, pulling her to his side as they walked. "I'd never let that happen. I'll come wake your ass up in the morning with a burger and some soda."

Nyoko leaned on him and closed her eyes. "Really? You would?"

"You can expect me bright and early, doll. Not all of us like to sleep in all the time." He laughed, glad he was able to calm her down and hoping she would forget all the girls completely.

"At least I'll have something to look forward to in the morning," Nyoko sighed. "One more reason to wake up in the morning."

"Silly, you have a million reasons to wake up, but that burger will be number one tomorrow."

She giggled and wrapped an arm around his middle, leaning into Boruto some more. "You're the number one reason I'll be waking up tomorrow, Boruto."

Feeling his heart skip a beat, Boruto held onto her and wished on everything that one day, he would find the nerve to ask her for more. For now though, it just wasn't possible.

.

.

.

In the weeks following that night, there was a shift in Boruto's relationship with Nyoko. He knew it had a lot to do with the other girls in his life, he knew that she felt something more for him and she wanted him to step up and do something about it.

But he couldn't.

Even if he wanted to, Boruto wasn't capable of telling her how he felt—he wasn't capable of being in a real romantic relationship with anyone. Not even her.

He tried his best to be there for her regardless, he never wanted to lose her, but he felt like he was. She was skipping movie nights with him and seeming to sleep more than ever. Nyoko was going off with her parents more often too and she hadn't been looking like herself. She was losing more weight and Boruto was scared. He knew it was all his fault because he was hurting her even though he didn't want to and he just didn't know how to fix it. All he wanted was her in his life—safe, healthy and smiling.

The more she distances herself from him, the more he did the same. Maybe it was for the best, he should just let her go. One day she would meet a decent guy who would be good for her and he would have to back off anyway. Boruto was never going to change. He had already considered it, but he didn't have the nerve for it. So he just started seeing more girls to forget about it, started drinking more and not thinking about all the what if's that had constantly been nagging him.

Forgetting her was impossible though and on those weeknights when he had consumed a particularly generous amount of alcohol, he couldn't help thinking of her and wishing things were back to normal. He wanted to see her. Wanted to talk to her. And Mitsuki was the one who had to deal with him.

"I wanna call… but I can't call… she won't fucking call me, bro. Why won't she call me?" Boruto has been going on for about half an hour straight.

Mitsuki turned on his bed and looked at Boruto. "It's three in the morning, Boruto. Nyoko is usually asleep by ten in the evening."

"Is it so wrong to want to talk to her? It's been two days since I've seen her. Maybe I should just go over to her dorm…" It didn't seem like a bad idea, but he was too busy drinking to actually get out of bed.

"Her roommate will kill you, and so will her neighbors," Mitsuki deadpanned. He was already not getting enough sleep since Boruto kept inviting girls over, but now that he was actually in his own bed, Boruto was being a drunk bastard. "Go to her dorm tomorrow morning when she wakes up."

"I need to talk to her nowwww." Boruto groaned and then had another drink straight from the bottle. It didn't even burn anymore.

Mituski groaned and picked up his phone, looking through his contacts. After a while, he found Nyoko's number and sent her a text, apologizing if he was waking her, but Boruto was drunk and being a nuisance. If she was willing, Mitsuki would come to fetch her from her dorm to come and talk to Boruto. "She's asleep—" His eyes widened when he got a reply almost instantly.

'I'm awake. Okay, I'll be there.'

It took a little longer than usual, but finally, there was a soft knock at the door. Mitsuki jumped out of bed and opened the door, and there stood Nyoko. She was in a large—or perhaps it looked large on her because she had lost a lot of weight—sweater and pajamas. Her hair was loose on her shoulders, it seemed a lot longer and heavier now that her face looked thinner.

"Hello." She smiled weakly.

"Doll?" Boruto jolted up in bed, knocking his closed bottle of liquor onto the floor.

Nyoko hummed. "It's me."

Mitsuki looked at her from head to toe and then zeroed in on her face. He usually said whatever was on his mind but surprisingly he kept his lips shut. "Do you want me to leave you alone?"

She smiled at him and gave Mitsuki a light hug. "You can sleep in my dorm for a while if you like. My roommate isn't there."

Mitsuki looked at Boruto and then back at her before nodding. "Just text me." And with that, he closed the door behind him, leaving the two in the dorm.

"Nyoko," Boruto grinned at her, holding out his hand for her to come over. "I've been missing you."

With small and careful steps, she made her way over to Boruto and sat on his bed, crossing her legs in front of her. "I've been missing you, too."

"Come here then," he said, giving her arm a little tug. He knew how much she loved to snuggle up to him and it had been too long.

Although she shifted a little closer, her nose wrinkled and she paused. "You smell like alcohol, Boruto."

Boruto hummed. "Been drinking… some." He shrugged but felt a little down that it put her off so much. "You want me to go shower?"

"No, it's okay." Nyoko moved a little closer, enough to lean her head on his shoulder but nowhere near as close as she used to cuddle with him. "Are you really drunk?" She poked his cheek. "I heard that drunk people can't lie… but anyway! Mitsuki told me you were looking for me."

"I have. I miss you and I know you've been avoiding me. I don't like it… I want us to be back to normal." It hurt to think that she didn't want the same thing—but Boruto was certain she did.

"I've been preoccupied with a lot of things, I'm sorry." She clutched onto his shirt and looked at him. "I want that too, but I also don't."

"Don't? Why… why not?" Boruto didn't like the thought of her not wanting to be his best friend anymore.

"Boruto…" Her hand shook as she gripped onto his shirt a little tighter, lower lip trembling. "Just what am I to you?"

What kind of a question was that? "You're my best friend, doll. You know that, don't you?" It had been that way for so long now. But he had messed up and not been around like he should, so he could understand her doubting him.

Her next breath came in shaky and her lower lip trembled. "Best friend? Is that all I'll ever be to you?" Nyoko released her hold on him and sat back, unable to look at him directly. "Because that's not what I want us to be."

"Why not? You don't want to be my friend anymore?" It really hurt him that she was pushing him away. Or had he been pushing her away all along?

"I want to be more than friends," she mumbled. "I've always had feelings for you, Boruto. And I thought… you might have for me as well."

And there it was—his biggest fear becoming reality. For so long, Boruto had tried to avoid this. He hoped it would never happen. But it was happening and there was nothing he could do to salvage their friendship. Truthfully he did have feelings for her. Boruto had been in love with her for years, but it didn't matter. He couldn't admit that to her.

"Nyoko… you don't mean that. You just think your feelings are more than what they are. You feel comfortable with me because we're best friends. That's all."

"I—What? No. That isn't what it is, Boruto. I mean it."

"Don't do this. Please don't ruin what we have. I don't want to lose you." Boruto could feel his heart breaking, but it was him who was now putting a distance between them as he slid further away from her.

It was all his fault for making her feel things for him. He should have known better.

"I'm not… doing anything, Boruto," She whispered. "If I was wrong, and you really don't love me, then at least tell me." Nyoko covered her face with her small hands, her shoulders shaking.

Boruto was about to lose her forever but he was desperate not to—not desperate enough to confess though. "I do love you, Nyoko… but I'm not in love with you."

She had pushed herself to the other side of the bed, folding her legs in front of her and keeping her hands on her face and her head bowed. No matter how hard she tried to hide her feelings from him, the sound of her choking on her own tears and sucking in the air was more than enough to let Boruto know how she was really feeling.

"Please don't cry, doll," Boruto frowned, moving closer to rub her back. He was too drunk to notice how much skinnier she was. "You mean so much to me. I just—it's not like that for me. Doesn't mean I don't love you though."

"B-But I do…" she cried. "I love you so much."

This was too much and he had drank way too much to deal with it properly. "I'm sorry." He whispered, not knowing what else to say. "You mean a lot to me… I wish I could be what you want but I can't. I'm still here though—I'm still your best friend."

Nyoko cried a little louder, but eventually started laughing between the tears. "I-I'm sorry." She cried more. "You shouldn't feel the need to love me back when you don't. That's not—not what I want." She wiped her tears away. "I never wanted to pressure you for anything, Boruto. I'm sorry if I ever have."

"Never." He denied it quickly, because it was true. The only pressure he felt was from himself. Never her. "Really, it's okay. I'm the one who is sorry, doll. And I meant it when I said I love you. You believe me, don't you?"

"They say drunk people never lie," she laughed between sobs. "I wouldn't know but I'll take their word for it. Or… yours, rather."

Boruto was sure what little remained of his heart had shattered and he wanted nothing more than to hold her, so he moved to sit next to her and pulled her onto his lap, not paying attention to how easy it was to do so. "I mean it… and… everything will be okay. I mean, we never know what might happen." Maybe one day he could admit his feelings. Right now though, Boruto couldn't see it happening.

Especially not tonight.

Nyoko leaned on him and wrapped her arms around his middle, trying her best to calm herself down. She didn't talk, only nodded, agreeing that they both really didn't know what would happen to them in the future. "I'm tired," she breathed.

"Okay." Boruto nodded and got under the covers, moving her along with him easily. She snuggled up to him just as she always did and Boruto held onto her, playing with her hair as she drifted off.

It was a long time after that before he actually fell asleep and he allowed himself to only after he'd told her sleeping form that he loved her once again, wishing he could tell her how much. This was all he could do for now though. Boruto pressed a soft kiss to the top of her head and finally let himself fall asleep as well. But when he woke up the following day, she wasn't there.

Mitsuki was in the room, doing some work on his laptop, but Boruto didn't bother asking about Nyoko. He felt like shit—both from drinking too much and from knowing how horrible he was to her.

That was the first time Boruto had ever seen her cry like that and it was because of him.

Needing some time to get his thoughts in order, Boruto decided not to reach out to her. He wanted to, but he just couldn't do it. Several times, he'd actually tried. He went to text her only to type a dozen different messages that all ended up being erased. Eventually he gave up and turned to alcohol again and for once Mitsuki didn't utter a single word to him.

At least not until the next day, when Boruto was awakened by his roommate calling out to him and shaking his shoulder. Groggily, Boruto's blue eyes fluttered open and he groaned. His head was pounding and Mitsuki was still hovering and shaking him, so Boruto slapped his hand away.

"What the hell, Mitsuki?" He snapped, hand coming together his face to rub his tired eyes.

"Boruto wake up!" Mitsuki sounded frantic. "It's Nyoko. She's—" he stopped, seemingly still horrified about what he was about to say. "She's—"

Boruto felt his blood run cold, eyes opening wide to truly take in his distressed friend. "She's what?" He moved to stand up but was so shaken, his knees were wobbly. "What's wrong with Nyoko?!"

There was a harsh knock on the door, a guy screaming behind it to open the door. Mitsuki rushed to open it, and Shikadai stumbled in, looking at the two of them. "They found Nyoko…"

"I know," Mitsuki replies grimly.

"Found her where?" Boruto looked between his friends, pushing Mitsuki on his arm when he didn't start talking immediately. "Did something happen to her?" It wasn't possible. Boruto wouldn't believe it.

Shikadai couldn't believe Boruto didn't know. "They found her in her dorm, she was asleep and—"

"She didn't wake up." Mitsuki finished.

She didn't wake up? "She's sleeping a lot." Boruto whispered, that was all. "She's just tired."

"Bro." Shikadai gave him a pitying look.

"She has been," Mitsuki agreed. "But Boruto, Nyoko's roommate found her and couldn't wake her up."

She was a deep sleeper. "Is it… something more serious?" Boruto asked carefully. He took a step towards his closet. He needed to get dressed. "Maybe… she needs to see a doctor."

"She was brought out by an ambulance," Shikadai replied quietly. "Most of the people were asking what for, though."

"We need to get to the hospital then." Boruto opened his closet and grabbed the closest shirt he could find.

"Boruto." Mitsuki walked up to him and placed a hand on his shoulder. He looked at his friend in the eyes. "Nyoko's dead."


It was cold—so cold it was freezing but thankfully there was no snow in the forecast.

Boruto did at least make sure to dress warmly, even wrapping his scarf around his neck and a thick toboggan was on his head, covering his ears. It was early, not even lunchtime but Boruto had been visiting Nyoko since just after the sun had risen.

It was a day as quiet and cold as death itself, but Boruto stood before her grave, staring at her name that was engraved so beautifully on the stone in front of him. He hadn't said anything, but he had cried a lot and spent a lot of time scolding himself. Even after three years—even after doing his best to be a better guy, Boruto still hadn't been able to forgive himself.

Maybe he never would.

Eventually, Boruto sat on the ground by her grave. By then, her parents had already come and gone as well as many of her friends and relatives. They never stayed long, but they all added flowers to her grave just as he had—said a few words and then went on their way. Boruto was the only one who found it so hard to leave. He didn't pay anyone else any attention, her parents being the only ones he greeted. For a while, he was just in a daze of painful nostalgia until a familiar scent filled his nose.

Sarada.

Boruto turned his head just in time to see the girl walking up, carrying flowers as well. At first, Boruto assumed she was there to pay respects to someone else and was walking over because she'd spotted him, but she added her flowers to all the other ones surrounding Nyoko's grave.

Having no words, Boruto just stared at her, face calm but giving away his inner turmoil. He was exhausted and on the verge of becoming ill, but he couldn't hide that from Sarada and he knew she was really seeing him.

Sarada smiled at him, and pulled out a thick blanket from her bag. She opened it open and draped it around his shoulders. Once she was satisfied that it kept him covered, she sat on the ground next to him, still not saying a word. She pulled out a canister next, and opened it up. Hot soup came pouring out and she handed it to him, a kind smile on her face.

"I think she would have wanted you to stay warm."

Knowing her, she probably would. Boruto nodded and had a sip of the soup even if his appetite was nonexistent. It was good and warm and it made him feel slightly better. Or maybe that was just Sarada.

"Thank you." He smiled at her, even if it came across as more sad than anything. He never expected her to show up—bringing him soup and a blanket. But he did appreciate it.

"You're welcome." Sarada smiled and rubbed his shoulder. She looked at him for a while, before looking over to Nyoko's grave. "I'm really sorry. I didn't mean to intrude here. I just wanted to know you were okay."

"That's okay… Nyoko gets a lot of visitors today. And I'm okay, Sarada. Glad that you came."

Sarada smiled at him. "It's no problem. I did want to come and meet her, too. Shikadai sends his regards."

Boruto hummed and had another sip of the soup. "He gave away my location, huh?"

"Shikadai can be extremely helpful when given the right incentive," Sarada giggled.

"Mmhmm." Boruto shook his head at that. "I'm sure you were very persuasive."

"Maybe a little bit," she stuck her tongue out at him playfully. When a cold wind blew, Sarada shuddered and wound her scarf on a little tighter. "I guess I should go, I don't want to catch a cold."

Frowning, Boruto looked back to the tombstone and sighed. Nyoko wouldn't want Sarada getting sick either and he had already been with her all day. "I'll drive you home." He said while holding his arm out with the blanket, inviting her in. "But first, I'll finish my soup. So come here."

Sarada's eyes widened but softened after a while. She moved closer to him and got under the blanket, feeling so much warmer. Her cheeks were flushed, rosy and so full of life. Her eyes stayed on the tombstone for a while before she finally leaned on Boruto's shoulder.

"You can tell me about her, if you like."

Boruto had another sip of his soup and found himself smiling softly at her thoughtfulness. "I'd love to tell you about her… another day though. Thank you for caring."

"Alright," Sarada nodded. "And when that day comes, I'll visit Nyoko again to validate everything." She grinned at him, although playful, was still soft. "Whenever you want to."

Nobody ever wanted to visit with him. Even Shikadai and Mitsuki avoided it. "I would really like that, Sarada. And I'm sure she would too."

For the first time in three years, on this very day, Boruto had managed to smile. Somehow, Sarada put him at ease and made everything seem a lot calmer. He was warm now and full thanks to the soup she'd brought him. He was also leaving the grave much earlier than he normally would, but he wasn't upset about it. If anything, Boruto was thankful because it felt like he was actually going to be moving on with his life.

He would never forget, but he could push forward and be an even better man. It seemed like the best option for him and he didn't want to hurt anyone else. Ever. Sarada had already told him that she believed he had changed and Boruto believed that too. He couldn't change the past, but he was determined to never make those mistakes again.

Boruto would always make sure that he showed those people closest to him that he cared.

Even after he finished his soup, Sarada didn't make a move to leave. She stayed right by his side and waited for him to be ready to go. Boruto finally stood up and offered her his hand, Sarada gladly took it and stood up, carefully folding her blanket and putting away the empty canister.

She waited for him a few steps away, watching Boruto as he looked at the tombstone one last time before turning to face Sarada and ushered her back on to the road then led the way to his car. He still opened her door for her, like he always did.

Once they were both settled in and Boruto turned the heater on, Sarada reached for his hand and held it in hers. Boruto didn't look at her, as he kept his eyes on the road, but he gave her hand a squeeze.

The rest of the ride was quiet, but the aura felt a lot lighter than it did since the start of the week and Boruto was happy to have Sarada with him at the end of the day.

For the first time, the day didn't end on such a heavy note. And Boruto felt like he was finally moving on.


A/N: lots of tears were shed while writing this chapter. Mostly Tyy. Hahaha! We both felt so attached to Nyoko and genuinely feel bad this is what had to push Boruto to grow and do better. Kudos to Sarada for also being understanding and supportive. Loss is a theme that's always hard to write and convey but we hope we were able to deliver the feels.

We go back to the canon chapters next week! Are you excited? I know I am!

Have a good week ahead, darlings.

Cheers,

Kairi and Tyy