It continued to rain heavily for a week, almost like it was a monsoon. The water from the ocean soon crept up the sands and almost washed into our small yard, lapping inches away. On the roads, rivers of water washed away the grit and disallowed anyone from passing. No cars could come in and out either. Nobody was able to take walks or bike in the sunshine. The rains had made sure of that.
Mrs. Pettigrew was my only visitor and that was rare. I didn't want her to walk in this weather and always chided her for it, soaked as she was each time she came through the door. Granted, she came to check on us only. She always made sure I had enough help and that Larry would fix a few things for me if needed. But I was more worried than I let them know.
It was bad enough that Hawkeye and Dad were stuck in the clinic, pulling overtime. They could not come home yet because of the influx of injured people and that made me paranoid about their safety. Hawkeye told me over the phone during a two-minute coffee break that there was serious flooding in town and that there were many injured. He could not abandon the town in their time of need.
"Keep inside," he instructed me before hanging up, like I was child. "Don't go out in the rain. I will come get you if it gets too bad."
I listened to him and did not make fun of him for treating me like I was an idiot, yet still I grew apprehensive, even if he had rescue plans ( I suspected something silly, akin to a small boat with Hawkeye blowing a duck whistle at the bow). Even though they both would have chosen service over selfishness, I could not but help to think that I needed them home too. But the rational part of me had to recall that Dad and Hawkeye had a hard road ahead of them. They could not make it home if the streets were flooded.
I stifled these yearnings. Instead, I learned to work the house on my own, like I was the only living inhabitant around and with two children. I continued to care for both girls. Shannon stayed close to me and tried to help when her sister was crying. I allowed her to pretend to be Mommy, but it was tough, especially since I was a wreck. She was holding it better together than I was.
I don't think it was the storm that bothered me the most either. It was those prints dirtying my home. Yet, I did not touch the box. I didn't know what I wanted to do with it. It was enough to see myself naked, a naïve teen-ager that did not know better, and relive the horror of being the target of my stepfather's perverse affections. And I was not the only woman that suffered.
After a few days of monotony, I decided that I had to face the music without Hawkeye in the house. When Shannon and Annabeth were napping one afternoon, I snuck back into my room under the stairs. I had not entered since that day and only tossed my journal in there without a second thought the last time I wrote. I unlocked the door and turned the new nob on the wall to illuminate the room. My eyes adjusted to the dim lighting.
First, I found my journal. It was askew on the floor, with pages bent and cover crooked. I walked over and adjusted the binding and paging. I placed it on the desk and turned to find the dreaded item.
There it was. The box sat there, right in the middle of the floor. It stared at me in a threatening manner, daring me to take a look in there. It almost made me run and throw up. The scream fell silent in my throat.
I took a deep breath, willing myself to hold it together. I could not be crying over every wounded body. I had to help them someone. There were more women in there. It was not just me that Clarence violated. Girls twelve and over were not safe. If my stepfather was partial to someone, he'd stalk them. He'd be friends with their parents and charm them. Somehow, he'd end up with the girl alone and silence her with empty threats that might mean the end of their world.
I had to save them all though. Their shame and humiliation, much like mine, had to close. The wound was born open for so long. There was no way to close it unless it burnt to ash and returned to the ground of its birth.
Luckily, the telephone ringing woke me from the reverie. I rushed out of my room, leaving its secret closed for the moment, and grabbed the receiver from the cradle. I blurted out a greeting and heard the voice of Mrs. Pettigrew. She sounded frantic.
"Jeanie, the neighborhood is evacuating to the Protestant church in the hills," Mrs. Pettigrew warned. "Take the girls. I will meet you outside. Larry will help you."
There was no argument. Mrs. Pettigrew did not leave much room for one as she hung up. But she was right. We had to go. It was possibly too dangerous.
I had to act quickly. Thankful for the intervention, I rushed. I grabbed my old Army bag from a closet and packed as many supplies as I could – clothes, diapers, wash cloths and flasks of clean water – and threw it over my shoulders. Then, I ran upstairs, pulling a grabbed poncho over my head and around the bag, and picked up my girls. Luckily, they remained asleep in my arms as we went downstairs.
When I wrapped Shannon and Annabeth in another poncho, I opened the front door. The sheer sheet of cold water surprised me as it pushed me back against the door. It also woke them up. Shannon and Annabeth screamed continuously as jumped through the invisible wall and went down the stairs to the road. The water was up to my knees.
I almost didn't see Larry. He met me in the road and took my pack and my arm. He pulled me forward, to where his grandmother was. She was trying to keep afloat in a small fishing boat when the water was already getting rough. When we reached her, Larry kept the craft upright as I handed first Shannon and then Annabeth to Mrs. Pettigrew. Larry helped me up and climbed in himself before picking up the oars.
I tried to keep the girls as dry as possible. It was damn near impossible to though. The rain pelted us like chips of ice and were unrelenting in their quest to find prey. Each child cried as if they were in pain.
Larry continuing rowing. It seemed to take forever to hit somewhere dry to land because he seemed to be running in circles, past streets and businesses. Crabapple Cove was larger than I expected and I wished that we somehow made it somewhere safe. When we did, Larry managed to get us to a set of stone stairs near the woods. I couldn't see where we were. All I could discern was a pair of women trying to get us inside the building.
I handed over the girls before disembarking. I held out a hand for Mrs. Pettigrew and Larry (who carried the bags) and we followed our saviors. When we were given towels to try to dry ourselves, we saw ourselves inside the church. Our names were taken.
We were separated. A nun took hold of my arm and took my things from Larry. She guided me to a room full of mothers and children. There was screaming and crying from every family. I could not hear myself think. There was no way to begin to calm my daughters either. They were as scared as the children who endured the same. Hearing the agony was no help.
"Over there," the good sister told me. She pointed to a corner to the right. "You'll find some clothes and sheets."
I held her sleeve, willing her to stay a moment. "I am a nurse. Is there any way I can help?"
"We made an infirmary near the chorus upstairs," she revealed as she returned my bag. "There are some sick and injured." She patted my shoulder. "Rest first."
I heeded her for the moment. I knew that Hawkeye would admonish me if I did anything to endanger myself and our daughters. I found a spot in the direction the nun pointed in and began drying water and tears. Luckily, the bag was not so soaked. Diapers and clothes were fairly dry.
Faster than the speed of a bullet, Annabeth was changed and dried. Shannon required some assistance since her dress was stuck to her legs. Then, she was gratified and looking around. She saw some girls she knew from around town and tried running off to them. Much like Hawkeye, I had to hold her back and prevent her from getting lost.
Some of the mothers knew me by sight. Since I was not amongst their inner circles, they usually shunned me. Others tepidly walked by and whispers questions of need. I declined their assistance. I already had Shannon and Annabeth corralled. I was just about to find another sister and ask them where their infirmary was when Mrs. Pettigrew entered.
She found me and immediately asked, "Are you all right?"
"I don't think I had this much excitement since Korea," I admitted. "We've had heavy rain, but not like this."
She eyed me suspiciously. "You're staying right here."
"I feel needed," I confessed. "I can't just sit here. The girls can't either."
"You need to rest," Mrs. Pettigrew insisted. "You are two months gone since your daughter was born."
"That didn't stop me in Korea," I began, but stopped myself. I didn't enjoy it then. "And who many of us are nurses? You, me and what army?"
Mrs. Pettigrew knew better than to argue and gave up. She grabbed a sheet and wrapped it around my top midsection. She took Annabeth from me and positioned her in the wrap. Then, she told Shannon to find her friends. She was watching my eldest daughter now.
"Go," she told me. "Just be careful." She stepped aside.
I could have kissed her on the cheek. I smiled instead and walked outside. For the first time since finding my purpose as a mother, I found one as a tool in this town. I was no burden. I had something to offer.
When I walked out of that room, I searched for anyone that seemed to belong to the church. Unfortunately, with so many of them in layman clothing, it was tough. Everyone was also wet and in despair. However, when I saw the sister that helped us in, I waved her down. She raised an eyebrow over Annabeth being so close to me, but said nothing except give me directions.
It was difficult navigating around crowds of people who had just come in or were trying to find loved ones. Eventually, I managed to squeeze through with Annabeth and walk up the side stairs to the chorus. There were open rooms before the balcony that overlooked the back of the blessed place. In them, instead of music sheets and instruments, were cots and piles of blankets full of sick and injured people.
Nobody asked me why I arrived, with a baby strapped to my chest. The nuns there were startled by my presence, but did not mind me issuing orders right when I entered. Instantly, I told them what to do, how and why. I had some of them ripping up sheets and another third boiling hot water. Others continued to stay by the sides of those who needed it, mostly for spiritual comfort. One followed me and wrote down directives.
Many buildings in town had collapsed. The floods also washed away one person from another. Then, there were the fires that eventually were extinguished by the rains.
Oh, there were so many stories! My head spun as I went from one patient to the next. Sometimes, I stopped to care for Annabeth and to send someone downstairs to check on Shannon and Mrs. Pettigrew. Other times, I had to stop and breath. I was moving so fast that I was wheezing.
By nighttime, things had settled down and I was tired and having difficulty breathing. Our only concern was that the rains were still coming down hard. The water level had reached the halfway mark of the church's stairs. Many prayed that it stayed right there, for this was the highest point in town. If it moved any higher, we would have to go to the next town and there were no plans to evacuate.
Mrs. Pettigrew joined me upstairs. She carried Shannon with her. My social child decided to tired herself out by talking to everyone she could. She told them all about Mommy and Daddy and how happy she was with a baby sister. Everyone thought she was as cute as a button. They didn't comment about her origins this time.
"She was being forward," Mrs. Pettigrew added. "If she had something to say, she did it. She did not care."
"Well, I wonder where that came from." I finished wrapping up a man's head wound. "If she had a soapbox, she would not stop talking."
Mrs. Pettigrew tried hard not to laugh. "Of course." She paused, unsure if her next comment was going to be heard. "Can you rest now?"
"Oh, I don't know." I sighed. I checked my next patient before addressing her again. "I have a few people that came from the movie theater. Some of them received burns from the electricity that made contact with the water. The good sisters rubbed some –"
"You should rest," Mrs. Pettigrew urged. "You cannot stay up on your feet."
I refused. "I cannot abandon them."
"For the sake of your children, will you listen?" Now, the neighbor was getting defensive. "You cannot keep a whole ward of patients under your thumb on your own. You need to sleep too. I can take over from here. Besides, girl, when was the last time Annabeth was fed and changed?"
"Half an hour ago," I reassured her. "You can ask anyone here."
"And Shannon? I know she was fed and dressed, but what if she was underfoot?"
"I would have stopped and gotten her food. She would have sat down in a corner and given something to do. She's not stupid. She is independent and a great help."
"And their mother is stubborn. What will Hawkeye say? And Daniel?"
"They know not to cross me."
"And they can override you. Jeanie, please. You need to sleep."
The argument continued from one patient to another. When everyone was seen to, I relented. Even so, I was still issuing orders like Margaret Houlihan. The nuns laughed and promised that they will take care of everyone.
Somebody had found a crib for Annabeth and several blankets for me and Shannon to sleep in. My eldest daughter was still in her Dreamland and looked more comfortable in her bed. I could not blame her. Being on my feet most of the day had allowed me to find coziness in any place of slumber.
And that was how Dad and Hawkeye found me. I was sleeping on some blankets on the floor in the practice room. Annabeth was in a makeshift crib nearby and Shannon was still curled on another pile of blankets next to me. Hawkeye had kneeled before me and was shaking my shoulder gently, calling out my name. When I woke up, he pressed a warm cup of coffee into my hands.
"Hi, honey, I'm home," he announced. "Miss me while I was in the office?"
"Oh, Hawkeye!" I was so relieved to see him that I almost knocked him over when I hugged him. The coffee cup was put to one side. "I am so glad to see you!"
Hawkeye muffled some words about wives, but I could not hear it. I didn't care what he said. I was happy to see him and Dad. The worries about those pictures had to wait. So long as I could hold onto Hawkeye, I was content as my sleeping baby.
"How is it outside?" I asked when we separated.
Dad wrung his hands together. "Well, the rain stopped. It's a start."
"How bad is it out there?" I was afraid of our home being destroyed. "How long will we stay here?"
"A few days," Hawkeye reassured me. "The basement is probably flooded. That's it."
I let out some air, thankful. But I had to let him go because they were being called by those in the other room. Hawkeye and Dad were going back to work. They picked up where I left off and checked off my work. On his way out, Hawkeye kissed me on top of my head. It meant it was a job well done on my part.
All I could do was go back to sleep. Mrs. Pettigrew was right. They were going to stop me. I had maybe a few minutes before Annabeth woke up. I was going to enjoy every moment of rest.
~00~
Hawkeye was appreciatively correct about the house. When we returned home, all we had to do was clean out the basement. That was not bad either. The boxes were full of items that were not damaged from the water, although the cardboard was soggy. Dad repackaged them and set them up on a high shelf.
"Do you have intentions of using this again?" I asked him as I motioned to the underground space. We finalized putting things away. "It looks like you spent time here at one point."
"It was a play area for the children and we smoked and drank with some friends here," he mentioned quietly. "No, it has not been used much since."
"Why don't we put the washer and dryer down here?" I suggested. "It might free up some space in the kitchen. It'll give me more space to work. We can also move some of Shannon's toys down here."
Dad said he'd consider it and consult someone about the laundry, but his mind was not focused on it. He had been quiet since we returned. I thought it was melancholy or being tired from all the work he did, but neither fit the bill. He was very cool towards me. I could not tell if he was angry or not. He held his cards very closely to his chest. There were no replacement requests from the dealer.
We went upstairs. I heard Annabeth call for me from upstairs in Shannon's room and was going to heed it, but Dad stopped me. He told Hawkeye to check on the baby.
"You did so much for Crabapple Cove," he told me when Hawkeye was gone. "You have no idea how much it did. So many people could have died."
"I did what I had to do," I admitted. "You know I could not stand there and watch on the sidelines."
"You're also a mother," he reminded me. "What are you teaching these girls?"
It was a test again. "That to be of service is better than being idle," I argued. "I am a nurse. I have two hands and two legs. So do they. When they are older, they can somehow be of help to the community."
"I am worried about you some days," he told me. "You're compulsive and dangerous."
"This was a compulsive and dangerous venture. If I had stayed in the house, we could have been in danger. Instead, Mrs. Pettigrew and I went to the church. Larry rowed us in. We are safe."
"Wait, Mrs. Pettigrew told you to go?"
"What is this now?" Hawkeye had come downstairs with a screaming Annabeth. He increased the volume of his voice. "Mrs. Pettigrew told Jeanie to do something?"
"She called me and told me we had to leave," I clarified.
The two of them looked at each other and then at me like I was insane to listen to an old lady. Maybe I was. But I was not standing down. I did what I had to do to survive. And it felt exhilarating to be a nurse again, but the peace brought to me by motherhood was far preferable at this time. It shook me to the core, taking care of patients again. I needed the rest from all of these adventures.
I took Annabeth from Hawkeye. "I am not an invalid," I reiterated to them both. "I am a woman. Don't treat me like a china doll."
I decided to nurse Annabeth alone. To ensure that both men did not follow me, I went to my room. Slamming the door didn't seem to bother my father-in-law. Hawkeye was quite perturbed and started complaining to Dad. I heard him tell Hawkeye to calm his horses and to let me be.
"I think she has things under control," he mentioned, although a little doubt lined the statement. "We'll see. She's strong. She'll get through it."
I wanted to believe all of that too. As I buttoned by shirt and attached Annabeth, all I could ponder was the impact I just made. It wasn't just for Crabapple Cove. Other than nursing my girls, I had not been in the medical field since Korea. I took to it like a person who had not ridden a bike in years. It was easy to fall back into the familiar pattern of taking control of a ward and running it with ease.
I was right though. I had to be of some use to Crabapple Cove. If I didn't and just isolated myself, where would I be? Yes, I was not in the best of health. I did not care about that for the moment. The town was in danger. It passed. Now, things are being set right and I am back to my favorite role. I am being a model to my girls.
But then again, unlike some of the buildings, the pictures were still there. I shoved the box with my foot into a corner. I couldn't immediately see them. It was best that way.
I will deal with it later.
This chapter is for momoflanda. Thanking you is never enough. I hope this makes your day too. Enjoy the new chapters. I hope to update more often.
