Back at Skyhold…
(Drusilla)
Word had spread that Blackwall had returned and was going to actually go through the Joining once this was all over. I had no doubt in my mind of his survival but I still found myself worrying for him. Sera liked him, his backstory elicited a raw reaction, and he was painfully human. Even though neither of us really used him as a party member after our first couple of playthroughs.
Thinking about his romance made me frown deeply. He wasn't as bad as Solas, but he was still an asshole. I huffed my way over to the little house Maven and I shared and grabbed "the booze" as Iron Bull requested before going up the steps. The day was winding to a close, so the time seemed about right to head up to his room.
Rapping on the door a few times, I waited and tried to ignore that weird giddy feeling.
"Over here, Dru. You're kinda early." Bull said from somewhere behind me and I felt the delight trail up my spine.
'Oh fuck.'
"I'm still amazed at how you can walk so quietly like that." I was scrutinizing his boots before I looked up at him and smiled.
"Hey, Bull. We agreed to talk when we got back and...so...here I am." Awkward. Awkward. Awkward. Could you be any more obvious?!
"The door's unlocked." He was grinning deviously as he invited me to enter his room first. His had a hole in the roof, right? Wonder if they ever patched that...was about to find out. I twisted the knob and gently pushed the door open.
They had fixed it, after all. There was a window facing the area outside of Skyhold, a big one too. The bed was also nicer than I remembered from the game. Bull wasn't the sort to ask for much so it was likely provided for him to ensure he was well-rested.
"The description of your room I once read about doesn't do it any justice at all." I mused, thoughtfully before turning to face him. He had walked over to sit on his bed and it was too reminiscent of the scene with the Inquisitor I had playing in my head. It was hard to repress the urge to wring my hands.
Instead, I busied them making the cocoa, heat shooting to a part of me that I often forgot existed when he set the container next to me. He'd also smuggled up a pot of water.
"You've read a lot about all of us, right?" He asked rhetorically and I pursed my lips to prevent myself from correcting him. This story should have been like breathing by now.
"That's a yes." He chuckled. "You have a decent idea of how we work, then. You already knew about Krem and didn't give a shit. Maven too. Neither of you cares about who Dorian or Sera are into bumping uglies with or about anyone's race. You know all or most of our secrets and you tell no one, which means you know what I prefer." He was talking about the Shibari, right? Dude liked his ropes. Couldn't blame him.
"We have something like it in my world...what you call akun atlok we call transgender, Dorian and Sera are just homosexual, the racism of a different sort is still there, and there's an entire community base for 'what you prefer'. We call it Shibari...the art of it, anyways and I'm...I have a decent understanding of it. Maven and I also have our own secret...and our thought on it is 'we don't want anyone to know our secret, so why should we blab about the secrets of others to anyone other than them?'. Plus, it isn't really any of our business." I shrugged, not ready to mention how he already knew the secret I mentioned.
"And?"
"You specifically? I believe the words were 'when it's a hostile target, you give them what they want, but when it's someone you care about, you give them what they need'. Have I really been tense?" He barked out another booming laugh, but it was awkward and didn't sound like it was let out at its true potential.
"You're not from here, at all. You or your twin are sent with the Inquisitor on just about every mission she goes on. Even though you can drink like a Charger, you hardly drink yourself stupid every night. Neither of you is used to any of this and I doubt a hot bath helps with everything every time. Even if you're rubbing one out." I coughed and almost knocked the pot of water I was boiling off the cask I was using.
"Don't exactly have the privacy to rub one out in a bath when I live with my sister." We were forced to do enough weird shit together way back then. I noticed his brows shot up at that admonition. Sure, Maven had taken to spending the night with Cullen, but masturbation wasn't a part of my life so I didn't feel the need to mention it.
"Wow, right. So both of you are pretty wound up."
"Can't really speak for Maven. No idea about the progress she's made with Cullen. We don't talk much about relationships and the like. Neither of us has had one in a while…" If ever.
"But you know she's with Cullen." Everyone fucking knows she's with Cullen. Nobles won't shut the fuck up and it isn't like the two of them are trying to be discreet.
"I know how to read her, she's my twin. The way her face reacted around the Commander when we met up to talk about the whole Winter Palace shindig said it has definitely been acquainted with his face." I laughed, remembering how fussy she got when I brought it up at all, even just a little. When I noticed I was smiling at Bull, I stopped and recalled why I was in his quarters.
"Right. In order for me to continue this conversation, I need to drink and I am almost done with this." The water was all boiled up and I stirred in the cocoa powder. The bottle I hadn't touched was a large one and I almost just upended it into the pot but decided against it. Cocoa was poured into both cups and I handed him one, freezing when I caught him watching me intently.
"You keep making that face and I won't be able to carry a conversation properly." Taking up a seat in a chair, I sighed. Right. Peppermint stuff.
"Surprised you don't think I'm a coward for how I've been dancing around the topic for so long."
"Life dealt you two a real shit hand but you still made something of yourselves after getting out. You push the nightmares and paranoia behind you while you work instead of letting them consume you. It's easier here because those people aren't just dead but in an entirely different world. We all notice how you and your sister react to those Terror demons. Ever since that first one. You could have balled yourselves up and tried to avoid it. Instead, you make a point to focus on them to get them out of the way as soon as you can. Those ones really suck with their teleporting shit. How you chose to handle that isn't cowardly."
"You know what I mean." I drank on and off during his monologue, trying to hide my expressions and thoughts from him.
"Wanna tell me what you're worried about?"
"Ruining the moment with a panic attack or a breakdown."
"But you want to ride the Bull?" He said the thing! My head snapped up and I broke into giggles, pleased and relieved he had said something from the game. The alcohol may have had something to do with how goofy I was too. This felt stronger than the stuff back home and I was beginning to appreciate it a whole lot more.
"Hmm, yeah. I was wondering if you were going to say that. Still caught me off guard." I took another large swig and warmed my insides. How long has it been that I was alone with a man and perfectly okay with it? With or without liquid courage…
Before this place, it was definitely work.
