Chapter Thirty Five
Present Day
Alice and Jasper came back in, just in time to hear Edward holding back sobs as he talked about his child's birth and what happened after.
"Why don't you give Edward a few minutes?" Alice suggested softly. She sat in Jasper's lap again once he was seated. "I can fill in the details there."
Barbara Walters nodded and smiled as Edward sniffled a bit and stood, walking out without another word.
Alice sighed. "It's hard for Edward to talk about. He almost lost Bella after the birth. The hospital accidentally gave her a drug that she was allergic to. It was bad. But in the end, she and the baby were both healthy and very happy. It was the happiest I've ever seen him…" she finished faintly.
"Tell us about you, Jasper," Barbara prompted. "Obviously you made it after your drug overdose, so what happened next?"
Jasper winced and Alice rubbed his shoulder. "You can do it, Jazzy. Go on. People need to know what happens when you mess with drugs."
He took in a deep breath and began his tale.
April 2006
"Leave me the fuck alone!" Jasper snapped.
The nurse sighed and walked out of the room. Ever since Jasper had awoken, he had been angry at everyone and everything. What was worse than the fact that he lived was the fact that he had to face the looks of hurt and pity on everyone's faces, especially Emmett.
He turned over as best he could in his restraints and felt a tear leak out of his eye. It wasn't supposed to be this way. When he first woke up, he had almost been grateful he'd lived. He could have sworn he heard Alice's voice and that was what brought him out of the darkness, but she wasn't here now and all he was faced with was the same amount of shit he'd had before. Rose and Em had their own life, Carlisle and Esme had theirs, same with Jacob and Lyn, Edward and Bella just had a baby…and where was he? Stuck in a fucking hospital.
So, naturally, the first chance he had, he'd tried to kill himself again, going into the bathroom and breaking the glass and attempting to jamb it in his neck. He'd bled all over the bathroom before a nurse came and found him. Luckily, he'd only nicked the artery. They'd put a pressure bandage on it, tossed him back on the bed, and now he was strapped down. They even went so far as to make the nurse hold a urinal under his dick for him to pee. It was degrading and it fully pissed him off.
He heard a door open and he sighed. "What the fuck do you want?"
Chanel No. 5 filled his senses as Rosalie stepped into his room.
"Leave," he said bitterly. "I don't want you here."
She didn't pause as those kitten heels clicked on the tile floor. She walked right around to where he was staring at the wall and she got right down into his face. "You know, I don't blame you, Jasper. I'd have done the same thing. Hell, I have done the same thing. I tried to kill myself once. Royce found me and had them pump my stomach. He said I'd just had a rough night and had ingested too many sleeping pills. Of course, I hadn't. I'd tried to escape him. Once we were back home, he then beat me so badly I thought that would kill me and I'd finally be out, but I wasn't. It wasn't until someone else intervened that I managed to escape." She smiled as she fingered her wedding band.
"Well jolly the fuck for you," he said flatly.
Her jaw set. "That wasn't what I was trying to tell you. I really don't give a shit how miserable you are, Jasper. I hate it for you, but I understand it. What I don't understand is how you can be so cold to Emmett. He's done nothing but love you his whole life, Jasper, and you blow him off and bitch at him and fuss at him and act like a royal bastard to him."
"I am a bastard," he said under his breath. "Literally. I don't have a daddy, see…"
She slapped his face. His eyes grew round as he looked up at her. "You fucking…!" she screamed. She turned and looked out the window, taking a deep breath. "I'm sorry. I swore I wouldn't lose my cool." She turned back to him. "Look, bottom line? I don't really care how you feel. Yes, you're my friend, but if you want to end it, I can't stop you. But I am going to get into your shit because you are hurting what's mine. I love Emmett with everything I am and I won't have you hurting him anymore. So here's the deal…they're moving you to a very nice psychiatric hospital. You can either get in there, fully commit to getting past your addictions and get yourself straightened out, or…I'll help you kill yourself."
He couldn't believe his ears. "What?"
She closed her eyes before she opened them and looked down at him. Gone was the pity he'd seen from everyone that had visited. Her eyes were now filled with nothing but steely resolve. "I've been there, like I said. But…if you don't think that you can get better, I'm sorry, I'd rather you be dead. At least Emmett could mourn you. As it is now…"
He sucked in a breath. Well, what a cold-hearted way to put things. But she was right. It all came down to him. He was being a selfish ass and he knew it. And he loved Emmett and…Alice.
"Where is she?" he said finally. When Rosalie looked at him in confusion, he said, "Alice. I know she was here."
An ounce of pity filled Rose's eyes as she said, "She was here, yes. But she had a commitment she couldn't get out of…"
"Meaning she saw that I'd live and then she left. They always leave…" he added softly.
"She loves you, Jasper, you asshat. Why, I honest-to-God don't know, but she does."
"She does?" he asked, incredulous.
Rosalie sighed. "Jasper, you have a second chance at life. Please, think about it and make it a good one, okay?" She bent down and brushed a kiss to his forehead. "Otherwise, I'm going to have to not let Emmett visit you. If you can't at least treat him decent, it's not worth it for him to come home and cry every time he sees you." And with that, she breezed back out of the hospital room.
Jasper thought long and hard that night. The nurses didn't come in to check on him like they usually did, probably because he was acting so contrary, and he was left to his musings.
When morning arrived, a new nurse came in and said cautiously, "Good morning, Mr. Whitlock, how did you rest?"
"I didn't," he said flatly.
He could see the look on her face; it was contention. He wondered briefly if she had drawn the short straw to land him as a patient. His voice was husky with the emotions that plagued him all night as he said, "Could…could you call in the doctor? I think…I think I'm ready to have myself committed…for my own good, to that treatment facility."
Surprise flickered across her face, but she merely nodded. "Alright. Let's see about getting you some help."
"Thank you," he whispered. "I need all the help I can get."
