"Nathan, you're going to miss your train," Elizabeth said at the bedroom door. He was sitting on the bed going through a wooden box that she'd seen first on his bookshelf in Airdrie. He'd brought it from there to their new house, and she had never seen what was inside. She only knew it was filled with his private boyhood treasures.

"I'm looking for..." he said, and then he held up a photo for her. "A picture of my father."

Elizabeth sat on the bed next to Nathan and carefully took the photo he offered. It felt fragile and old; a daguerreotype, worn, silvery and fading in a cloud around the edges. It was Archie as a younger man with Nathan's dark hair, and he was off center in the frame and solemnly looking at the camera. Elizabeth could imagine this man worrying for his family, caught in the grip of gambling. He had a furtive look about his eyes, like an animal caught in a trap.

She sighed, remembering something Nathan had said to her once. Every person you meet has a story that can break your heart. Elizabeth's heart went out to the Archie Grant that looked back at her from the picture. At that point in his life, he had such a long, hard road ahead.

And now Archie was missing, and the why was a mystery. Elizabeth had heard Nathan so clearly that day, his voice choked with emotion when Archie had told him he was arresting the wrong person. You have no idea how badly I want to believe that right now. Nathan wanted to see the best of his father, but history was tugging at him.

Elizabeth leaned her head on Nathan's shoulder. If she could, she would take away every bit of the pain she felt right now in her husband's heart. She thought of the boy Nathan was, opening this wooden box and taking out the picture of his father, looking at it, trying so hard to understand. She had no words of comfort for him, so she simply said softly, "I love you, Nathan."

He turned and held her tightly, kissing her hair. "I'm not sure you know how much it means to me to have you to come home to, Elizabeth. You're like my North Star." He pulled away, smiling. "You, the children, this town, this house. So steady and constant."

Elizabeth smiled. "We'll be here waiting for you. And missing you," she said, her eyes glistening.

Nathan tenderly lifted her chin and kissed her. He sighed and held her once more, and then took a deep breath. "I'd better go," he said.

Elizabeth nodded. She was still holding the photo. "Let me put this in an envelope," she said. "It will protect it."

Nathan followed her out to her writing desk. She pulled an envelope out of the drawer and he smiled. When he'd been in Airdrie, those envelopes had given him great joy to receive. He liked the idea that he would be carrying one with him in his travels. Nathan went to the front window to look out at the pond and the town beyond.

It was very early, and the sun was just causing a glow at the horizon. Allie and Jack were still asleep, so Nathan and Elizabeth were talking quietly. Nathan wore his red serge today. Much as he disliked taking advantage of his position as a Mountie, it did oil the wheels somewhat when he traveled. This was a personal matter, but if his father was in trouble, it could easily become a professional one.

There was a fine mist laying low on the meadow and the pond. Elizabeth came up behind him and snuggled under his arm. The muted sky reflected in the water, and she thought again about how she never minded the gray during weather like this. It actually made her feel safe, warm, and comfortable in their house. With the windows all around it reminded her of Allie's treehouse out back, a little haven amid nature's unpredictable ways.

The rooster, Chester, was beginning to crow. His full name, given by Allie, was Mr. Rochester, because he had black moods and tended to bluster around the chickens like her favorite hero in Jane Eyre. In keeping with her grandmother, Allie had quickly named every animal on the Grant homestead. They kept the chickens for the eggs and not for meat, so they were in no danger. But Allie wasn't taking any chances.

"I wish I could go with you to the station," Elizabeth said.

Nathan put the envelope with Archie's photo into his pouch at his hip and took his heavy blue wool coat from the rack at the door. "No, we decided that it didn't make sense to wake the children just to wave goodbye again. We did all that last night. But you..." Nathan said, pulling her tightly to him.

Nathan smoothed her hair, still down around her shoulders and tousled from sleep. She wore her robe and nightgown and it reminded him again that this exquisite woman was entirely his. "...You, I will say goodbye to as many times as I can..." He kissed her, this time allowing himself the luxury of time and the heat she always seemed to bring out in him. He knew that the moment he stepped through the door he would miss being able to do this.

He gathered the necessary strength of will to move his lips from hers and he exhaled. "You think it'll always be like this?" he said, laughing softly. "I don't ever seem to get enough of you."

Elizabeth kept her eyes closed against his shoulder, feeling the rough wool of his coat at the same time she felt a little lightheaded from the kiss. She said, sighing, "Yes, I think it will always be like this. I can't imagine ever feeling any less than this when you kiss me." She looked into his eyes, bright and blue in the emerging light. Knowing it was just delaying the inevitable but not wanting it to end, Elizabeth put her arms around his neck and kissed him again.

After a moment, Nathan whispered roughly, "I could take the later train..."

Closing her eyes and steeling her courage, Elizabeth put him at arm's length. "You don't know how much I would love that, but one of us has to be strong," she said, sighing. "I'm glad you're not riding in this weather. It looks like rain." She reached up and closed the top button of his heavy coat and then straightened his hat. "Stay warm. Stay safe. Call me when you get to Edmonton, before you head out to Spruce Grove? Hopefully the weather will be better there."

Nathan smiled his crooked smile. "Ah, now you're happy the phone is in the house, aren't you?"

Elizabeth smiled back at him. "Yes. And that noisy thing can ring every hour if it's you on the other end of the line."

Elizabeth was working very hard to hold back the tears that were threatening to fill her eyes. They would fall as soon as he was far enough away to not see them. This was hard enough without making it harder for him.

They wanted to keep the warmth in the house, so they didn't open the front door yet. "Do you know how much I love you, angel?" he said softly.

"Um-hmmm," she said fervently. "As much as I love you." She brushed her lips across his once more quickly. He opened the door, walked through it and closed it behind him.

Elizabeth went to the window and watched him walk out into the mist, and now the tears did fall in long streaks down her face and into her cotton robe. When he had disappeared in the haze, Elizabeth closed her eyes with her forehead on the cold window. God, please keep him safe. Let him find his father and bring Archie home to us. And Lord, please keep us safe here at home too. All of us.

Elizabeth untied her robe and moved her hands down to her stomach, feeling for any difference. There was no rise, no change to match the myriad changes she was feeling inside. She had decided to stop by and see Carson soon, just to be sure, but she didn't really need to.

After little Jack, Elizabeth knew the signs – general fatigue, a sudden aversion to the smell of coffee, nausea after tasting Allie's fish or the goat's milk, changeable emotions, soreness in her breasts, trouble sleeping, headaches. Also, with Jack she had been in the throes of such grief that she'd had no idea what day or month it was for a while. This time, she knew exactly.

Elizabeth closed her eyes again and let the familiar wave of pure happiness wash over her, ending with a shiver in her neck. Something of me and something of Nathan, creating another miraculous little being that we will bring into the world and watch grow and love. God's wonder and our joy.

She'd been so close to telling him just now. All it would take would be four little words; I think I'm pregnant, and she knew he would have stayed. Nothing would have gotten him on that train.

Elizabeth wasn't unaware of Nathan's fear for her. It was not only an emotional reaction, it was logical, after what he'd been through with Sarah. But she also knew the other side, Nathan's intense desire to have a child, to have children with her. She didn't need to send him off with those warring emotions and no real way to process them in the middle of an investigation that was already emotional enough for him.

Walking to the kitchen, Elizabeth put the water on to boil. A cup of ginger tea would settle her stomach and then she would have a few hours to write before Jack woke up and it was time for Allie and Elizabeth to get ready for school. She would write by hand so she wouldn't wake them, and then would transcribe later with her typewriter into the pages of her book.

Waiting for the water to boil, Elizabeth looked again at the many photos they had on their walls. Their snowstorm wedding picture, photos of Airdrie, Rebecca, Charlie, Allie and Jack, Julie, Rosemary and Lee. She stopped at the framed drawing of the four of them that Nathan had promised Opal would go on their wall.

Touching it gently, Elizabeth smiled and whispered, "We'll need you to add another one, Opal."

Nathan walked quickly through the very early morning ghost town of Hope Valley, making up the extra time he'd spent with Elizabeth. Ned was up, bringing in an overnight delivery from in front of the Mercantile, and the lights were on in the newspaper office. Other than that, the mists rested undisturbed in the town.

Ned waved, "Hey, Nathan. Early day for you."

Nathan tipped his hat and walked closer to Ned. "Heading up to Edmonton on the train." Nathan had only told Bill what he would be doing up there. It felt like personal family business and until he knew more, there was no reason to say more. "Investigation. I should be back in a couple of days, at most a week."

Ned shook his hand and said, "Good luck. And rest assured we'll keep an eye on your family."

Nathan laughed softly and nodded. "I know you will, Ned. And you can't know how grateful I am for that."

The train station was busier than the town, but boarding in Hope Valley meant that Nathan had his pick of seats. Once they went through Calgary and picked up many more passengers, Nathan would be glad for the leg room he was afforded now.

The train would go right through Airdrie and Nathan considered letting Rebecca and Charlie know, but he knew they would only have the ten minutes the train sat in the station, and Nathan wasn't sure he wanted to explain why he was going to Edmonton just yet.

As the train pulled out of Hope Valley, he was remembering what his father had said from behind the bars in jail: So this is what happens to people like us, once you have a record. The automatic assumption that whatever you're doing is something illegal, or wrong, or has some ulterior motive. Nathan had seen it in Benson Hills with the Mountie investigating the necklace that had been stolen. Nathan was resolving, right now, to assume innocence before guilt with Archie. And this sudden disappearance, though troubling, didn't mean that his father was doing anything wrong.

Nathan yawned, knowing he had a long train trip and glad that he would probably sleep for part of it. After the trips to and from Airdrie with Elizabeth, Allie, and Jack, he felt a little adrift. He'd brought books to read, but for now he leaned his head on the cool window and watched as the farms and homesteads outside of Hope Valley flew by.

He wasn't really seeing them. He was back in Elizabeth's arms, both of them warm from sleep, murmuring their plans for the day to each other from their pillows. When he had tried to imagine waking up to Elizabeth, he'd been lacking the experience to know how wonderful it would truly be. Nathan silently blessed whatever twists of fate had led him to this life.

He reached down and opened the pouch attached to his belt. He pulled out the envelope with Archie's picture, and slipped his fingers inside. The photo came out, but so did a small piece of paper.

I'm there with you. Always. Don't forget to meet me in your dreams. x E

Nathan smiled. She had taken to putting a small circle over the E that she usually signed on her notes. It was an angel's halo. It had started out as a joke, but he loved it so much that she'd continued. As he looked at it now, it blurred as his eyes filled.

He put the note against the palm of his hand and moved it over his heart, sliding his thumb over the belt strap.

This. This feeling is the one that Nathan had worked so hard to push away for so many years. If you love it, you can lose it. And God only knew how much he loved Elizabeth.

Breathing deeply, Nathan shook his head, still looking out of the train window. No. Those are old thoughts. He smiled and wiped the moisture from the corner of his eye. And as he did, he breathed again and consciously opened his heart further than he knew was possible.

As he closed his eyes and fell asleep, he thought of her note again.

Yes, Elizabeth. You are here with me. Always.