Tenth part : Talks
Song: Michael Logen – Darkness Within
I couldn't believe I had one that! Why on earth did I hug Street? And why did I cry while I was doing it? I was so shaken by what had just happened. I just needed to go to sleep! And that was what I did. As soon as my head reached the pillows, I fall deeply asleep and woke up until the morning.
I woke up very early. When I opened the door, Street was asleep on the sofa. He was snoring. I swore if my phone had some battery, I would record him! Just in case… to have something to blackmail him with.
I went to the kitchen. I had to keep my mind busy. Last night, I had been weak in front of Street and I was not proud of it. Even if he was my best friend, I couldn't be like that. I was evolving in a men's world and I needed to be much stronger, much tougher. I made some eggs, I fried bacon, I made pancakes. I was so on fire this morning! It had so much to do with the fact that this afternoon the doctor was gonna to remove my plaster.
Street woke up around 6:30AM. He had to go to work today. His shift was beginning at 8. He seemed so tired when he showed up in the kitchen. He drank a coffee, took some eggs, pancakes and bacon in a plastic box to eat in the morning. He promised me to be back in the afternoon to take me to the doctor. I didn't even ask for it. I could take the bus or order an Uber. But I could feel he was really to do it. Then he went to work and I remained alone in my apartment.
This afternoon, I had to go to the hospital. I didn't like to go there but this time, it was for the good cause: I was about to say goodbye to my plaster after six weeks of immobilization. It also meant I would be back to work in a few days and my life could be like before the explosion! I waited for this moment for so long!
I washed my uniform and my boots. I made it dry in the bathroom. I made sure my stuff were all clear for going back to work. I prepared my bag with my jump rope, my shots and my towel. I cleaned my room. I had let too much stuff lay around for weeks.
I was ready to go almost 45 minutes earlier. I put my jacket and got out of the apartment to enjoy the sun. I sat on the stairs on the first floor of the building and waited for Street to pick me up. I had not done this for so long. I was happy to be there…
My mind was drifting through the past weeks. So much had happened in so little time. I didn't know where to start. I met Street almost three years ago. We quickly became friends. It was as if I had known him forever! I could talk about anything with him, I could share my thoughts (not my deepest thoughts but at least the most convenient ones), I laughes and teased him. Everything seemed so easy when we were together. I thanked heaven every day for having met him!
And I totally screwed up. I kissed him while I was drunk and I felt guilty about it since. I had made myself a promise not to date or kiss any cop, anytime, anywhere after what had happened with Thompson. I shouldn't have done that but at the moment, it had seemed to be the thing to do… I was mad at myself. I broke our friendship and I had been blaming him for months. I lost the connection with my best friend for a mistake I made because of alcohol. I had been weak and I had refused to admit it. I paid for it since: he has been dating Molly and we lost the connection we had before. I hoped that one day, I would be able to make amends.
Street arrived right on time. I jumped on the bike just beside him and he drove till the hospital. I didn't want to talk. I thought he understood I needed silence and anything else. We entered the hospital and went to the waiting room. We didn't wait for long. The doctor came to meet me just a few minutes after we sat on the chairs.
I went to his office, letting Street alone in the waiting room. The doctor told me my arm was as good as before. I had to remain careful because it was still fragile. For at least six other weeks, I had to remain in the control room. At that moment, I had to come back to his office and he would give me the right to be back on the field.
I was relieved the doctor authorized me to go back to work. I was gonna be able to find my routine again. Even if I had to stay at SWAT HQ all day, it was a good beginning. The doctor asked me to meet a physiotherapist twice a week to rehabilitate my arm. I agreed even if it bothered me. I had to be 100% when I will be back on the field.
"You're free!" Street shouted as I came out of the doctor's office.
"Finally! I can't believe it is finished. The doc said I can go back to work on Monday!"
I called Hondo to learn him the good news. He exulted on the phone! I was so happy to be back at work with them all. I could hear Tan, Luca and Deac shouting besides Hondo. Soon all this story would be a bad dream and my life would be back to normal.
Street was still there, waiting for me. He was smiling like a kid. I liked when he was like this. On my way home, I was fine. My new life was about to begin and I really needed that to be able to move on.
This night, I made a promise to myself: starting to live again. We ordered a pizza, drank beers and played cards. And we laughed. We laughed so hard my belly was aching! It was a perfect night. SO I once again did something I shouldn't have: I got up from the sofa and I went to hug Street one last time. I was nostalgic. Our time together was coming to an end. And even if I didn't really want to admit it, I really enjoyed it.
"Thank you for everything you have done for me since the explosion. I could not have done anything without you. But from tomorrow, you'll be free to do what you like. I have used too much of your time by now. You could have time to be with Molly!"
As I was saying the last sentence, my heart broke. I should not have felt like this but it was the case. I put my forehead against his and we stayed there for seconds, minutes, hours. I didn't know what time it was when I left him in the middle of the living room.
"Goodnight, Street."
I closed the door and stayed for a moment. I was smiling. Whatever I was thinking, it was one of the best moments I had ever had. I knew it was bad because Street was in love with Molly but I couldn't fight this feeling. I went to bed still thinking about what had just happened. But as I was falling asleep, I heard someone knocking at the door…