Chapter 19
Rachel stands a few feet into the room, her eyes darting back and forth between House and Cuddy, her features carrying a forlorn expression.
"Oh God," Cuddy breathes, briefly turning her body away from Rachel and looking up at the ceiling, utterly horrified and dismayed. The fact that her little girl has been a witness to their fight invokes Cuddy's softer side even further, and the tears that have been brimming throughout the last part of her quarrel with House finally spill over. She swiftly wipes at them before facing her daughter. "Everything's okay, honey," she says softly, swallowing hard against the lump in her throat. "Come here," she holds out her hand, beckoning Rachel over. She sits down on the edge of the bed a few feet away from House, and helps Rachel crawl onto her lap. "I'm sorry we were talking so loud we woke you up." House detects a load of guilt on her face as more tears roll down her cheeks.
"You sad, Mommy?" Rachel searches her mother's face apprehensively.
"Yeah," Cuddy nods. "Mommy's a little sad. But it's okay." She tries to reassure her daughter by caressing her face and back.
"Why are you sad?"
Cuddy takes in a deep breath, her gaze leaving Rachel's as she tries to figure out what to respond.
House jumps in, mumbling, "I did something I shouldn't have done."
Rachel turns her head to him. "You draw on the living room wall with crayons, too?"
"No," he huffs. "I, uh," he scratches his head behind his ear, "I got married. To the wrong woman."
Rachel's eyes go wide with interest. "She not a princess?"
"Nope. More like a toad." He is uncertain of what to do or say. Cuddy keeps her eyes on Rachel, still crying silently, and runs one hand soothingly across Rachel's back; the other is resting on her round belly. "Promise me you don't ever do that," he continues talking to Rachel, "get married to the wrong guy. It'll make your mama sad."
Rachel nods, not completely understanding what she is agreeing to, then returns her attention to Cuddy.
"I didn't sleep with her," he mutters. This information catches Cuddy's attention. He holds her gaze, trying to convey to her that he is telling the truth. "Or Alina."
Her expression is almost blank, and he has the feeling she has some doubts and questions, but her eyes swiftly dash to Rachel.
House picks up the hint and, to allay Rachel's confusion, he adds, "In the same bed."
Rachel's eyebrows rise up, and she asks, "You sleepy in mommy's bed tonight?" The question is somewhat lying at hand, considering the fact that all three of them are currently sitting on said bed.
"No," he shakes his head. "Mommy needs it to herself. Look at how big she is." He winks at Rachel.
Rachel grins and places her tiny hands on Cuddy's baby bump.
"But maybe I'll fit into yours," he smirks at her with mischief. "You wanna see me try?"
She bobs her head up and down.
"Come on." He grabs his cane and slowly rises from the bed.
Rachel hesitates, giving her mother a concerned glance.
"It's okay, sweetie, Mommy's fine," Cuddy assures her, gently combing her fingers through Rachel's hair. "Go with House."
"You want a kiss?" Rachel offers.
Cuddy smiles in surprise, visibly moved by the unexpected affection. "I'd love a kiss." She bows forward and turns her cheek to Rachel, who gives her a loud smack. "Thank you."
Rachel whispers, "Good night, baby," kissing Cuddy's belly as well.
After pressing her lips to the crown of Rachel's head, Cuddy mutters, "I love you, sweetheart," and releases her daughter to the floor.
"Love you, too."
House keeps his eyes on the carpet as he holds out his hand to Rachel. He briefly glances over his shoulder when he exits the room with her, catching Cuddy in the action of wiping more tears from her face.
He shares a couple of moments of silliness with Rachel before he tucks her back in, and stays with her until she is asleep.
After that, he limps to the kitchen to grab a bottle of water, and returns to Cuddy's room. She is lying in bed on her side, her back turned to him. He carefully places the water on the nightstand. Her eyes are closed, but he can tell from her breathing that she is awake.
He knows there is so much more they should address, but their situation seems too messed up and complicated, and he feels powerless to fix it. Also, her demeanor implies she wants to be left alone. But maybe he has been misinterpreting her all along. Maybe her want doesn't align with her need, and both of them had them mixed up on too many occasions.
His thigh hurts, which prompts him to take the middle ground: He quietly sits down on the carpet with his back against the bed and his legs out long, thus leaving her alone without actually leaving.
After many minutes of silence, he hears her shift, turning around on the mattress. There's a pause, then she reaches for the water and takes a few gulps.
He keeps his focus straight ahead, but catches her movements out of the corner of his eye.
She opens the drawer of her nightstand and pulls something from it. "Hand me that," she mumbles, pointing to the floor next to him. It's a bottle of Aloe Vera gel.
He does as told, and a few moments later he hears a quiet thumping. A heartbeat. Their baby's. They both remain silent as they listen to it together.
He counts 47 beats before the sound stops and she has drifted off to sleep.