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Rachel couldn't deny that even on a normal day, she thought the world of Eddie's young son. She often didn't have the first clue what to do with him, but once he got over his shyness he was sweet, and extremely cute. She had never been so grateful to be woken up by the ring of Eddie's phone, however, with Alison offering him the day with the little boy.

They'd spent the evening exchanging almost painfully polite interactions. Usually, they both delighted in eating together and talking- last night, they'd eaten in front of the tv, neither really watching the talk show that was playing but each unwilling to engage with the other enough to turn it over either. It had still been early when Rachel quietly announced she was going to bed. She'd read for a while, before switching off and lying in the dark and when Eddie had finally come up, softly querying if she were still awake, she'd closed her eyes and pretended that she wasn't.

With the addition of a young child in the mix, however, it was much easier to pretend things weren't awkward between them. Michael's chatter filled the silences, and concentrating on him meant that neither could stew over the situation.

He smiled at Rachel, having crawled onto her lap to show his drawing. "See Rachel?" he was saying, pointing to the paper. "There's daddy, and mummy, and Joe, and you, and Spot!"

She stared at the drawing, a little stunned. "Who's Spot?" she managed, trying not to show her awe at the inclusion of her in Michael's family.

"My puppy."

She gave him a puzzled look. "Sweetheart, you don't have a puppy."

"Yes I do! He's over there." He pointed to an empty space on the floor. "See? He likes you, he's wagging his tail."

"He's an imaginary puppy?"

He shot her a wounded glance. "Spot's not imagery!"

"Imaginary," she corrected gently. "And of course he isn't. Silly me."

"Will you play with me and Spot?"

She smiled in amusement, but nodded her head. "Of course I will."

Unbeknownst to both of them, from the doorway of the room, Eddie was watching. As Rachel deposited Michael on the floor and quickly joined him, the faintly wistful expression he had quickly became one of fondness and affection, the stab of pure love he felt taking his breath away.

He stood there for longer than was probably normal, as the pair pretended to play tug-of-war with a dog, Michael 'helping' Spot and cheering when they won. And then he wanted to play fetch, and Rachel obliged, throwing a small ball across the room and breaking down into helpless laughter when Michael happily ran after it and brought it back time after time. Eddie had never heard a lovelier sound.

"Rachel, can I have juice?"

Eddie was snapped into awareness at his son's question, backing away from the doorway as he heard Rachel answer in the affirmative and offer to fetch it. Thirty seconds later, she entered the kitchen, barely having time to register his presence before she found herself engulfed in his embrace.

It took her a second to react, sliding her arms around him as he held her so tightly she wasn't certain she could take a deep breath. "What's this for?" she murmured, but he only responded by burying his face deeper into her hair. Within a few seconds, she'd decided she didn't care, and simply nestled into his hold, closing her eyes. She hadn't realised how much she'd missed this since the day before. She wasn't sure how to feel about that- she wasn't a child, she shouldn't constantly need someone's presence.

Eddie drew back just enough to see her face. "I love you."

She blinked in confusion, but he saw her expression soften slightly. "I love you too. Are you okay?" Her hand caressed his cheek, concern flicking through her but he merely nodded, and tipped her head up to kiss her.

That she definitely wasn't going to complain about.

They were interrupted, however, by giggling from the doorway. Sure enough, Michael was peeking around the frame, beaming at them both. "Michael, it's not nice to eavesdrop," Eddie told him, fighting to hide his amusement. Instead of paying attention, the little boy came flying at them and quickly found himself thrown high into the air, before Eddie settled him in his arms. Rachel couldn't help but smile at the pair, absently thinking how well fatherhood suited Eddie.

He didn't miss her expression. "Hey bud, can you go play for a little bit? I'll bring you your juice."

Rachel quirked an eyebrow as Michael scramble down and scampered from the room. "And you scolded him for eavesdropping."

Eddie didn't even look sheepish, instead taking her into his arms again and ignored her faint look of surprise. "I need you tell you something," he said seriously, and concern flickered over her gaze.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing's wrong. I just… I need you to know, even if we're fighting and things aren't okay, I love you. I'm always going to be on your side, no matter what. I'm always going to fight for you."

Warmth and awe and pure love shot through her at his words. Even if she didn't strictly need to hear him say it, knew it already, she couldn't deny that something inside her was soothed by his assurance. Her arms were wound around his waist, holding onto him just as tightly. "Eddie, has something happened? Is that why you're saying this?"

He quickly shook his head, pressing a kiss to her head. "No, no of course not. I just… need you to know."

"I do," she whispered, stroking her thumb over his cheekbone. She had no clue what had prompted this at this particular moment, but she could practically see him sag in relief at her words, drawing her into a hug that she couldn't be unhappy about.

"Daaddddyyy!"

They both laughed, breaking apart at the whine from the other room. "I'll get it." Rachel filled a cup and vanished back to the living room, where he heard her corralling Michael to sit down and drink slowly. She was wonderful with him, even if she didn't realise it. And he'd already decided- he was going to do his best to drop whatever had been between them. He wasn't sure he'd ever be Chris's biggest fan, but he was going to make a much bigger effort to hide his feelings from now on. The alternative was what he'd experienced the past day, and that was intolerable.

Laughter from the living room drew him back in, but this time, Rachel looked up and saw him, grinning at him. "Michael," she caught the little boy's attention, "why don't we ask daddy to play?"

Instantly, his head shot up and he practically glowed. "Daddy! Play horsey with me!"

Eddie swallowed his groan, shooting a mock glare at Rachel who had her best innocent look on. "If my knees give out, you only have yourself to blame," he joked, dropping to the floor. She gave him a sly smile.

"Your knees? And here I was worried about your back."

His jaw dropped. "Bloody cheek!"

But as long as she kept smiling that, Michael's giggles filling the air, he'd take a bad back, knees, neck- anything at all.

W.R.

When her alarm went off on Monday morning, Rachel promptly turned it off, rolled over and went back to sleep. It was so unusual that a very confused Eddie opened his eyes, peered and her, and actually checked her temperature with a hand to her forehead. The whole time they'd been together, Rachel was awake with her alarm, even if she didn't actually get out of bed. She also had a habit of forcing him awake at the same time. Quizzically, he gave her a poke. "Rach? You okay?"

She gave a grumble, and buried her face in her pillow. He sat up, and looked at her contemplatively. "Rach, I'm not really sure what to do here," he admitted. "This is new." She didn't respond. He glanced at the clock, saw that as usual, she had set it early. So there was no harm in letting her sleep for a while longer, he supposed, swinging out of bed and padding to the shower.

By the time he'd finished in the bathroom, remerged and dressed, she still hadn't stirred. He was more than a little puzzled, but he gave her as long as it took for him to make a cup of coffee and bring it upstairs before he tried to wake her again. "Darling, you'll be late if you sleep much longer," he said gently, growing more and more concerned.

She let out a groan, opening her eyes just enough to glare at him. "What?" Then, she frowned, raising her head to look at him properly. "You're dressed?"

"I am." He looked amused. "Sit up and I have coffee for you."

She scrambled upright, looking at the clock. "Did I forget to set the alarm?"

"No… you turned it off and went back to sleep." He fought to keep his lips from twitching in amusement, especially when a frown settled over her face as she looked down at her drink. He leant over, kissed her forehead. "I'll put some toast in for us."

What Eddie didn't realise, however, was that the frown wasn't due to confusion, but realisation. Now a little more awake and aware, she remembered exactly why she was so tired. She was just grateful Eddie hadn't noticed her slip out of bed at one am, after jolting herself awake gasping for air. It had taken a while- and several cups of tea- before she'd calmed another to creep back in, which explained her current state of tiredness, she thought, peering at herself in the mirror. Makeup was going to be needed today.

Downstairs, the radio played softly as Eddie dug out the bread from the cupboard and popped it in the toaster, keeping an eye on the clock as he did so. It took him longer to get to school than it did Rachel, especially with the traffic. He swigged the last of his coffee, turning to put the cup in the sink, only to pause. He'd been the last one in the kitchen last night, having put the dishwasher on last thing. Which is how he knew there absolutely hadn't been a cup in the sink when he and Rachel had gone to bed.

Which begged the question, how was there one now? It had to be Rachel's, but why she'd apparently decided to come downstairs in the middle of the night and make tea was beyond him. Maybe she was sleepwalking? She'd never mentioned it before… and making tea while asleep seemed like the kind of thing that would produce enough noise to wake him. Which meant that in all probability, she'd done it while awake then. She was hiding something from him, he knew, and while he'd promised himself he wouldn't rock the boat, he was beginning to lose patience.

He was sat at the island when Rachel came down, immediately bending to press a kiss to his cheek. "Thank you," she said simply, knowing he'd understand that she meant for everything he'd done this morning.

He managed a weak smile, waiting until she'd settled into her seat. "So why are you so tired?" he began tentatively.

She waved him off. "No particular reason. Must not have slept well."

He narrowed his eyes, but kept his tone carefully mild. "Difficult to sleep when you're down here making tea."

She froze, lowered the slice of toast she'd been about to bite into. "How did you…?"

"You left your cup in the sink."

She winced, and the look her was giving her made everything worse. She placed the toast down, suddenly losing her appetite. "I'm sorry," she said quietly, "I woke up, couldn't get back to sleep so came and made some tea. I didn't say because I didn't want to worry you."

He leant back, gave her a measured look. "Rachel, you only ended up worrying me more."

"Sorry."

"Just tell me next time?" He looked exasperated, and she reached for his hand.

"I will."

He kissed her, before dashing off upstairs to finish getting ready. She blew out a breath, relief running through her that he'd accepted her answer and hadn't tried to dig deeper. This was getting ridiculous, she thought, and resolved to google how to stop nightmares in fully grown adults later on… preferably where there was no chance of anyone overseeing.

But later never came.

Rachel hadn't allowed herself to think of Eddie, of Phillip and Lacey, of the hundreds of children back at school she was leaving behind when she went after Bianca. The thought that Eddie would be angry, that Chris would disapprove- none of it had crossed her mind. It wasn't until she'd been stood in that caravan staring at a lighter that it had begun to dawn on her just how much she wanted out of there. She couldn't understand the man in front of her, had no clue what was going on in his mind to convince him that any of this was a good idea.

For a moment, when she felt the heat of the flames on her back, she was convinced they were going to die.

It had been instinctive to grab Bianca, to shield her the best she could in the same way she hadn't hesitated to climb into her car to come after her, to stand in front of a JCB, to step between Flick Mellor and her father, run towards a gunshot instead of away from it, to remain in a burning building just in case… how many explosions could one person survive? She was a headteacher, this wasn't supposed to be her life.

She had held it together though, until she got back to school, her hold over her emotions tenuous at best. The fire, the flames- for a moment, she was half-convinced she could feel her scar burning again. She couldn't, it wasn't, of course it wasn't but equally, her lungs were screaming for air even as her brain told her they were expanding.

Kim's kind gaze didn't help, and she stumbled gratefully into the quiet of her office. She should call Eddie, she knew, before he found out some other way. There was no way what had happened wouldn't make the news, and it would take only one mention of her involvement to tell him. But she was busy trying to breathe, to not shatter completely in an office where anyone could walk in at any moment.

By the time she'd managed to get the trembling in her fingers to stop, Kim and Chris walked in with a bottle of wine. She was no longer on the verge of tears, but still shaken, turning the day's events over and over in her mind. A child had almost died- a small change, a slight tweaks in events and there as every possibility that she would have. Rachel had thought the school was secure, had put her faith in it. Chris and Kim's reassurances did little to comfort her.

She jumped when she felt a hand on her arm, bringing her harshly back to reality. Kim was looking at her, a mix of concern and sympathy in her eyes. "Are you okay?"

"I'm fine." She knew her tone was too curt, too harsh, but she couldn't bring herself to care. Kim and Chris exchanged a look, one which she couldn't be bothered to confront them about.

"I'll drive you home," Chris offered.

"That's not necessary. Besides, I don't think any of us should be driving."

Kim hesitated for a moment. "I've barely had any," she said finally, and Rachel shot her an odd look that she ignored. "I'll drive. No arguments. You as well, Chris."

It didn't quite turn out as planned. Chris refused to leave Rachel alone, and Kim couldn't bring herself to leave him without a way home so they both ended up inviting themselves to Rachel's, who seemed to be holding herself together so well that Kim knew it was all an act. No one was that okay after what she'd been through today.

She sat next to her on the sofa while Chris was clattering around in the kitchen making tea. "You don't have to be strong all of the time, you know," she murmured. "I wouldn't think any less of you. No one would."

Rachel didn't react, still staring at nothing in particular. "I would."

"Oh Rachel…"

Anything else she may have said was cut off by Chris entering, balancing three cups of tea as he looked between the uncertainly. "Everything alright?"

"Fine," Rachel said quickly, taking her cup. "So come on- one of you distract me with something. Isn't that why you're here?"

They exchanged a look, both faltering. Rachel huffed. "Well, you two are rubbish," she jibed good-naturedly. "In that case, you might as well tell me what I missed today. I know there was something."

Chris glanced at Kim. "You can take that one."

"Oh, thanks very much."

As Kim began to talk, Chris glanced around the room. It suited Rachel, he thought, the colours and the décor. Though he was harshly reminded that it wasn't just hers when his gaze landed on a photo of her and Eddie, heads close together as they beamed at the camera. He ignored the pang that sent through him, instead allowing his eyes to drift over the other pictures. There was one of a little boy he didn't recognise, giggling at whoever was holding the camera. Another of two babies laid together, an older picture he thought might have been a young Phillip perched on a swing and an even older one of two children on a beach. He couldn't see the others, knew they were of people, one of whom he would assume was occasionally Rachel. Regardless, they were all a stark reminder that he knew very little about his boss and her life.

His attention was drawn back by Rachel letting out a groan and tipping her head back. He assumed Kim had finished updating her. "Nope, I quit," she said. "Chris, you're in charge now. You can deal with it."

"Not in a million years." He shuddered. "You're not allowed to go anywhere."

She lifted her head. "You wouldn't do it? Not even for me?"

She was joking, grinning as he shook his head vigorously. But even as she did so, the errant thought crossed her mind that if it had been Eddie sat in front of her, he would have offered long before she asked, jokingly or not.

Speak of the devil, she thought as she heard his key in the lock. And then, almost immediately, felt her stomach sink. Because the first thing he would see when he walked in, was going to be Chris sat on the sofa. That was going to go down well, she thought, resisting the urge to groan and feeling a rush of thanks that Kim was here too. At least that might stop Eddie from completely hitting the roof.

The angle was wrong for her to see his expression as she heard him move towards the doorway, but Chris gave a tight nod, looking immensely uncomfortable. Kim just looked confused, glancing between them all uncertainly and Rachel had to resist the urge to sigh. "Hello, love," she called out instead, and Eddie stepped into the room, eyes searching her out.

"What happened?" he asked instantly. Tears pricked at her eyes. Of course he would know the instant he looked at her. She blinked rapidly, unable to speak lest she burst into tears.

Kim seemed to understand, placing her cup down and reaching out to give her hand a squeeze. "We'll see you in the morning," she murmured, shooting Chris a pointed look. Rachel could have kissed her. As it was, she managed a curt, insincere smile, throat thick as she struggled to keep herself together.

Eddie was visibly baffled as he walked Kim and Chris out, not missing the fact that neither would meet his gaze. "Kim?" he questioned softly before she stepped out, but she just shook her head.

"See you, Eddie."

His stomach was somewhere near his feet as he retraced his steps back to Rachel, and immediately felt it plummet straight through the floor. She was sat with her face buried in her hands, shoulders shaking. He knelt before her, hands gently pulling hers away. "Sweetheart?"

She looked up at him, tears streaking down her face and a look of complete devastation in her eyes. A second later, she'd fallen forward into his arms, stifling a sob against his shoulder and he could only hold her, murmuring meaningless platitudes as his mind raced with what could have prompted this. She clung to him, but before long he couldn't maintain the position they were in any longer. "Come here, darling." He levered himself up next to her, immediately scooped her up so that she was half on his lap, curled up against him as she cried.

He didn't know how long they sat there- long enough that the room had grown dim when her sobs finally petered out. After she'd been silent for a while, he shifted to look at her face properly, and immediately his heart broke all over again. She'd cried herself to sleep, but even then, tears still leaked from under her eyelids, face contorted. He gathered her closer, pressed his lips to her hair as he stroked a hand up and down her spine, attempting to soothe her. He'd seen her upset in the past, certainly, but never to this extent, and he was somewhat dreading what had caused it.

For now, however, he would let her sleep. From his position, he could reach the remote for the tv and flicked it on, quickly muting it so it didn't disturb her. He flicked through a few channels, finding nothing of interest until a news report caught his eye- it was reporting live from Rochdale, which wasn't exactly usual. He turned the subtitles on, grimacing upon realising how lagging they were.

Two minutes later, that grimace had turned into a gape. His gaze moved from the screen, down to Rachel and then back again. It didn't take a genius to work out the basics of what had happened, even with the sparse details in the report. "What did you do this time?" he mumbled resignedly, and flopped his head backwards against the arm of the sofa.

"I couldn't leave her. She's a child."

Eddie raised his head again, peered down at the woman in his arms. Her eyes were fixed to the screen, pale as she watched the bustle of police officers behind the reporter. He sat them both up, reached over to hand Rachel a tissue and looked at her square on. "Tell me," he said simply, but leaving no room for argument.

So she did.

Almost monotone, face blank as she described what had happened, everything from the very beginning right up to finding herself trapped inside that caravan with a terrified child and her murderous father. It was only when the lighter came up that her voice cracked, breath hitching and Eddie instinctively caught hold of her hand, but remained silent as she continued to talk. He had to bite his tongue to stop from lashing out at her, allowing her to finish before she fell quiet, face now dry but with a haunted expression on her face. "Come on then," she murmured, "let me have it."

"What?"

"I know you're itching to tell me how foolish I was. How it's not my job to save everyone, I'm just a teacher, I should never have gone in."

He did want to tell her all those things, but it seemed she already knew them. "I think you're beating yourself up enough for the both of us," he said quietly. Her gaze flicked up to meet his, and he sighed, reaching out to pull her into a hug. "I do think all of those things," he admitted. "I also know that you are who you are, and there's nothing in the world that could have stopped you from trying to protect a child."

She nestled into his embrace, closing her eyes against him. "I thought he was going to do it," she whispered, and he felt the shudder run through her. "I thought he was going to kill us both."

The thought made his throat constrict, dread and fear settling into his stomach like a rock as his arms tightened around her. He should have been there, should have been able to help. How different would things have been if it had been him in that school today instead of Chris Mead? Eddie closed his eyes, rested his lips against her temple as her hand came up to rest against his chest, her voice tiny. "I'm sorry."

He couldn't bring himself to reply.