She's driving him to work today. He also has a massive hangover. And he already did one workout but still has to do a second to be on track. Today is going to be rough.
Did he really have a liquid dinner last night? Did he really have a conversation with her while drunk? Did he really tell her he'd wait for her? Did she really ask him to wait for her? What did all of that mean? Ugh, he really needs this hangover to go away so he can think without garden gnomes playing drums in his head.
But he knows for sure that she asked him to wait for her and that's what's important. She wants him, on some level at least partially. There's still the question of the date she's going on on Saturday. Should he ask her about it? Try and talk her out of it maybe? Is that his place? Is that part of waiting for her? Does he have to wait through dates with others? He just doesn't know.
His brain wants to argue all of it with her. But he's tired of arguing with her. He wants to be able to hold her already. He wants to be able to snatch her away from other people and to have her all to himself. But if he continues with these thoughts, or worse if he acts on that behaviors, is he showing her that he will wait for her? So even if the idea of her going out with someone else fills him with despair, he'll stay home with Jack and distract himself with whatever sports game is playing on the television while he knows she'll be out in the arms of someone else.
He can't let his mind be distracted by all of this anymore as Emily pulls up in front of his apartment building. For now he'll focus on the fact that he gets to spend an extra twenty minutes with his best friend, thanks to his stupidity last night. Is it the best of circumstances? No, but he's not sorry about it. So far they haven't received any calls about dump sites or new graves they have to head off to, so all they have to do is head into the office like normal. Walking out to her car, he can hear a light beat coming from inside her car, and sees her sitting in her car waiting for him. He opens the backseat door and places his stuff down. She hits the button to turn off her music as he places his bags down.
"Morning." Her voice tinkles through the air like a wind chime and he can't help but smile. Not even a hangover can take away the fact that he's getting to spend extra time with Emily.
"Morning." He replies as he slides into the passenger's seat.
"How are you feeling today?" She asks, but before he can answer, she tacks on, "How's your head?"
"It's ok. Nothing I can't live through." He admits begrudgingly as he pulls his seat belt on.
"I…" She starts to say something but trails off.
"You?"
"I was surprised to find you drinking like that." She admits.
"Why?"
"Because I don't think I've seen you drinking since Insanity started, but especially not at work." Her shoulder's move up and then down. "Didn't think I'd find you in your office on Thursday drowning yourself in scotch."
"Wasn't exactly my best moment." But the heat doesn't rise to his cheeks like he expects. He's not embarrassed by it like he thought he would be. It got them to talk about more than they usually would, so he'll take the fact that he had to get drunker than normally for it to happen. She put herself out there. She asked him to wait. That means something, especially coming from her who barely says the things she wants or needs to a lot of the time.
"No, but I think we both needed it." Emily admits, her thoughts following a similar path as his. "I think we both said things we needed to say." She doesn't regret the words said in his office or her car. In fact, she's proud of a lot of what was said last night. They're finally moving on the right path she thinks. They're finally having conversations that aren't just screaming at each other. They're finally on a path that is making it towards where they're supposed to be. With each other hopefully.
"Emily, I said some nasty things though-" She stops him as she turns onto the highway.
"And I haven't been the best at handling your heart. We've both made mistakes. But hopefully this is our start towards the finish line?" She says with hopefulness weaved into each word. "I meant what I said last night Aaron. I want you, but my heart is not completely there yet. I need just a little more time. But I'm in this. For us." She keeps her eyes on the road, not wanting to lose her nerve as she speaks her truth.
"That means a lot to me Em." He wants to take her hand in his, wants to place kisses on it. But he doesn't know how far off from a them she might be. He doesn't want to push her away, so for now he'll keep his hands to himself. But her own hand reaches for his and pulls his left into her right.
"Hopefully soon." She makes a promise to both him and herself.
"Only as soon as you're ready for it. I'm not trying to push you into something you aren't ready for." He turns his hand over to lightly squeeze hers. He'll always love the feeling of her hand in his. Just slightly smaller than his, but strong in their own ways. He doesn't want to let her go, but he feels as though he has been holding on to her for too long already, even though it has only been a few moments. But surprisingly, when he tries to let go, it's Emily's hand that keeps holding on. Her fingers wind in between his fingers while her other hand rests on the steering wheel.
The traffic is slow moving, so the two sit in silence. Aaron's too scared that if he says anything he'll break the soft bubble they have around them. She may realize that she still has his hand in hers and withdrawal back into herself. The warmth of his hand in hers is calming. Definitely not something that she wants to pull away from anytime soon. But she can't help but wonder if he's only leaving his hand because she had pulled it back. So she loosens her hold on his hand, to let him pull away if he wants to. But she's surprised when he squeezes her hand and pulls it back towards his. He had been surprised when she took charge in their relationship, or whatever they could call this between them, but he was happily surprised to be sure. After all this time of her pulling away in the moments when he wished she would lean into everything, this change was a welcomed one.
She knows he wants her, that he loves her. But here in this conversation less place, she can almost see the mechanics of how easy the two of them being together could be. Picturing a future together was one thing, but she could see the day to day, driving to work together, enjoying the little moments of quiet, things outside of just working together. The idea of spending little moments together, well it calms her and warms her to the idea of diving into a relationship, to placing her claims on him in a way that is different than just saying 'this is my best friend'.
Turning off of the highway, there's only a few more minutes before they'll be at the federal building. Aaron doesn't want the ride to be over, mainly because he knows they'll have to slip back into their roles as boss and subordinate as well as he'll lose his hold on her hand. It's a small thing to be sad to lose but after all their fights and arguments in the past couple weeks, he doesn't want to let go. He looks over to see a look of chagrin painting her features.
"What's wrong?" He asks.
"It's nothing."
"It's not nothing with that look on your face."
"I'm fine." He watches as Emily starts to place her emotions into boxes and he doesn't want to lose the insight into her.
"Emily, you can talk to me, about anything."
"And make your hangover worse, I'll pass." She lets a small smile take over her muscles, trying to distract him.
"You're not going to make my hangover worse by talking to me. The only person who made my hangover worse was me." He adds, not wanting her to take any of the blame for the fact that he's hungover.
"I'm fine." She repeats as she pulls into the parking garage. He isn't going to push her. In the past, that has only made things worse. So instead he watches as she swipes her badge to open the gate into the garage. The silence engulfs the car again.
"Why no music?" Aaron asks, finally noticing the thing that was even more different, beyond the hand holding.
"What?"
"You always play music. I don't think I've ever gone for a ride in your car where your music isn't blasting."
"Oh. Yeah I guess you're right." Emily looks down towards her stereo for a split second, her favorite thing about her car. "I thought your head might be pounding a bit much for music on top of it." Emily shrugs as she starts to turn into a parking space. She gave up her music for him? Emily, who would have music going twenty four seven if it was allowed? "I didn't want your headache to be worse."
"It wouldn't have made it that much worse. I'm more sorry that you didn't get your music. I know it's your preferred way to start your morning."
"There's other good ways to start the morning too." Emily says with a Cheshire like grin and Aaron can't even begin to imagine what is going through her head.
"Want to share?"
"You'll just have to wait and see if you get to find out." Emily says before taking her hand back to put her car into park. The underlying tone draws the reaction from him that she was hoping for. His mind is sent right back to their make out on his couch. What he would give to go back to that moment to find out what she means now. No, you want to have her for more than one night, his mind reminds him. "You coming?" Emily asks as she steps out of her now opened door.
"Not now," He grumbles at the double entendre she doesn't know she made. Emily looks back over her shoulder at him as she slams the door with one hand. Did he say not now? But moments later, Aaron gets out of the other side and starts to reach for his own stuff. Maybe she just heard him wrong.
The pair walks towards the elevators to ride up to their floor. They pass Jerry the security guard who they both wave to and then get on the metal box. Both profilers are in their own heads, thinking over the things that need to get done today. Emily is kind of hoping they catch another case so she can get out of the Ambassador's Ball tomorrow. Aaron knows that he has a list of things to get done, but the one that is sticking to the forefront of his mind is the fact that Emily has her secret date tomorrow that he still hasn't figured out anything more about. It's not like he can just admit to her that he accidentally eavesdropped on her conversation and wants to know more. But all the other tactics he has are either illegal or take a lot more explaining to be able to utilize.
His focus falls on her or wanders to where her plans might be instead of being able to concentrate on work. He can see her hand move as it writes her case file. She entices his every breath. He thought that they were moving forward. Hell, even in the car this morning, it felt different. But she's still going on pointless dates? It's frustrating. He meant what he told her last night. He'll wait until she's ready, but if it means watching her go through dating other men, well it will hurt but he'll do it.
She can feel his eyes on her for most of the morning. If he had a question, he would ask her right? Between that and the hoping that they catch another case so she can avoid tomorrow night, her day passes quicker than normal. She might be able to get home before it's super late. But as the clock gets closer to five, the chances of catching a case is slim. It seems like she may have to go tomorrow, but at least tonight she can get her workout in and then maybe relax. In terms of weeks, this hasn't been the worst, but it's been very long. So much had happened in less than a week. She kissed Aaron, they fought, she figured out her feelings for Aaron with JJ, Aaron decided they needed space, she found him drinking more than she'd seen him drinking in weeks, he told her he'd wait for her, and then there was the car ride this morning. Her heart had been taken on a trip this week, but she knows now what she really wants. She wants him. Risking her heart is worth it if it's for him. He's worth it. Glancing upwards, she tries to see the man of her heart, but he seems to have closed his blinds while she was thinking about everything that has happened.
Her files can wait until Monday to get turned in. If she sees Aaron, she may do something she regrets. So instead she leaves them on her desk as she starts to pack up her bag and collect her things to head out.
"You leaving Princess?" Morgan's voice calls from behind her.
"Getting ready to." She says with a smile. "Want to get my weekend started as soon as possible before we get called on a new case."
"Could it be you want to avoid a case because of your date tomorrow?" Morgan wiggles his eyebrows at her.
"Wouldn't you like to know."
"About someone that caught your attention enough to get a Saturday night out of you? Yes I would like to know."
"Well I hope you're happy being disappointed." She smirks at him as she shrugs her leather jacket on.
"Ouch Princess. My heart." His hand comes to rest upon his chest, above where his heart lays, mocking if she had stabbed him in the heart.
"Don't listen to him Prentiss, he'll survive not getting information." Reid says from his desk next to Emily's. "He doesn't have to get everything he's ever wanted in one go."
"I thought he was supposed to be a profiler, but yet, he's known about this for days and knows nothing new."
"Being a profiler doesn't mean I can read minds." Morgan mutters defensively.
"Yeah but seeing how little you like to work, I would have thought you would have figured more out then the nothing you've figured out." Emily teases the profiler she's known for going on five years.
"Well how about you give us some clues and I bet we can figure all of this out?" Emily shakes her head in response to Morgan's question.
"I've seen you figure out profiles with less." She crosses her arms as she smiles towards him.
"Fine. You're giving up a Saturday night for this guy, so clearly he doesn't have a non nine to five job that is keeping you from going out on a weekday. But somehow you're both managing to get a Saturday night off, so he must have made plans for the two of you. I'm thinking something like a nice dinner, reservations that you didn't want to miss, but he must have been the one making the plans since you told him to send you the information. You must know him pretty well since you're giving control in planning the date." He looks her over and then continues. "You're relaxed which means he must not be super new, and seeing as you needed to talk about girl problems with JJ the other day, I would guess this is getting pretty serious."
"Anything else?" Emily asks, trying to see what else he was seeing that isn't there.
"That's all I got right now." Morgan smirks at her. "So how good did I get?"
"I'm so single right now it's not even funny. But good try." She slips her bag over her shoulder and passes her folders to him. "As your reward, you can turn my files in too. I'm going to head out. See you Monday boys." Emily makes her way towards the elevator as Morgan and Reid watch her go.
"Guess I should go give these to Hotch?" Morgan says looking down at the files Emily handed to him.
"Maybe you should." Reid agrees as he pulls on his own coat. Morgan makes his way up the stairs towards Hotch's office.
"Hey Hotch," Morgan knocks on the door as he opens it, "I have some files for you."
"Come on in." Aaron looks up from the files he's checking over. "You finished more files than normal."
"Oh some of these are Emily's."
"Did she already leave?" Aaron glances at the window, but since his blinds are drawn, he can't see her desk. Turning back to face the dark skinned agent in front of him, he holds a hand out for the files.
"She wanted to get out of here for some reason."
"Maybe she has a date." Aaron answers glumly.
"Well seeing as she says she's 'so single it isn't funny', I don't think a date is in the cards tonight." Morgan shrugs. "I think she just wanted to get out of here before there's a case that pulls us out of having a weekend." So single it's not even funny? Then what was all the talk about her plans tomorrow? Aaron looks down at the files so that Morgan doesn't catch the questions in his eyes. Maybe he should message her and see if they can hang out tomorrow? But it wouldn't be a date. Jack would be there again. That wouldn't push her in the wrong direction right?
As Emily sits in traffic, one hand on her steering wheel, she can't help but think through what Morgan had pointed out. If she were in another time and place, if she were something different than who she is, maybe he could have been making assumptions about her and Aaron, but instead he just happens to think that her having plans on a Saturday means a date. Her mother forcing her to go to an event where she will have to duck 'suitable' matches and talk politics all night is the farthest thing ever from a date. Maybe if she asked Aaron to tag along with her, she could avoid having to talk to the other men her mother is going to try to force on her. But asking him to tag along this late would be a bad idea. He'd have to find someone to watch Jack. Plus if the press puts pictures of them at a non work event together, Penelope will find them and she will have so much worse things to deal with. Although, having Aaron would make the event so much more fun.
She shakes her head as Within You by David Bowie comes on. She added the whole Labyrinth soundtrack to her playlist a few days ago after remembering how much she loves David Bowie, but this one is a lot slower and almost darker than most of the other songs on her playlist. A great song, but she's not sure if it's what she should listen to right now. So instead she presses skip to see if something more lighthearted comes up. The opening notes of Stairway to Heaven by Led Zeppelin play, and although it's also not super upbeat, it calms her in a way that Within You wasn't. Something about the lyrics of Within You had hit her in a weird way that she couldn't think about, didn't want to think about. Running a hand through her hair, she looks up at the exit she passes to see how much farther she has to go. Jackson Ave- means she still has a few exits to go.
Across town, Aaron is getting in his own car to head home. He wants to see Jack before the night gets away from him, especially after last night. Plus after skipping dinner yesterday in exchange for his liquid dinner, he might want to actually try to get back on track tonight. A real dinner and his second workout, maybe not in that order though. The idea of doing a second Insanity workout sits in his gut like a bag of rocks. There's so many other things he would rather be doing- many of them involving Emily if he's telling the absolute truth.
He should have invited her to come workout with him, or seen if he could come workout with her. But at this point she's probably almost home, since she left before him. And he's not going to make her sit through traffic again just to come workout. So it looks like he'll be suffering through this workout on his own… unfortunately. He did Cardio Recovery to catch up this morning, so that means tonight he has to do Cardio Power and Resistance…? Or was it Plyometric Cardio Circuit? He had looked at the list this morning, but he honestly can't remember which one is tonight's workout.
Inside her apartment, Emily makes her way towards her bedroom to grab workout clothes. First tank top is… a blue one that reads 'I got 99 problems and burpees are all of them'. Probably some truth in that today. She grabs a pair of black shorts and her tennis shoes. After changing, she makes her way to the bathroom to pull her hair up. All she needs to do is get through this workout and then her responsibilities are done for the day.
So stepping back into her living room, she boots up her computer and brings up the webpage that she has visited so much recently. She pulls up the next workout for tonight. As the montage starts she gets herself mentally ready to start sweating and deal with a workout that she doesn't really want to do, but she will to keep going. Technically, all she has to do is make it to the end of Insanity and then she has a date with Aaron, which hopefully her heart will be ready for by then. Emily would laugh, if her lungs weren't already trying to keep up with the workout in front of her. She wouldn't be laughing at the idea of it, because a date with Aaron doesn't scare her like it used to. She would be laughing at the idea that it might take her another forty seven days to be ready to be with Aaron. For some reason that makes her want to laugh. Almost like her mind is telling her that sooner rather than later would be better, for both of them, she realizes as the workout pulls to a close. Could it be that she doesn't need more time?
